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The World of Paradox

After the chaos of their arrival, the Doctor and Amy's next few days in Venice were comparatively relaxing. After arranging a funeral for Guido and Isabella once they'd confirmed that the two had no other family in the area, they'd spent some time enjoying the sights of the city, appreciating their relative peace now that the crisis had been resolved.

It had been a difficult crisis in its way, but the Doctor had enjoyed the chance not to think about the Saturnynes' potential support from the Faction. It was worrying, but in the end, the Saturnynes nearly sinking Venice was just another example of the problems that had arisen since the destruction of Gallifrey rather than an example of their usual efforts. The Faction might have ensured that the Saturnynes would go to Earth in particular, but they couldn't take too much action on their own; the Saturnynes were relatively free to interfere in Earth's past as their past wouldn't have been affected if history had been changed, but the Faction were still limited in case they unintentionally paradoxed themselves out of existence, lacking the necessary temporal security systems to fully protect themselves from their more extreme changes.

He just wished that he felt as confident about that as he would have done in the past; the days when the Faction were satisfied to be nothing more than a cult preaching about the pointlessness of life and demonstrating their ability to twist history into minor loops were a thing of the past. He could tell himself that the destruction of Gallifrey had ensured that the Faction would be limited in their influence on the wider universe by depriving them of access to his peoples' technology, but as that mess with the Tractites had proven, even amateurs could get lucky; the Grandfather's knowledge just helped ensure that they wouldn't push the universe to the point. As long as the TARDIS remained out of their grasp, all they had was what the Grandfather could create away from Gallifrey, but the grandfather could do a great deal; after all, anything the Doctor could do could just as easily be achieved by the Grandfather.

The night after they'd left Venice, the Doctor had thought he'd seen a figure in armour standing off to the side in the console room, just out of the corner of his eye, but the moment had passed and he'd dismissed it as mere paranoia; if the Grandfather regained access to the TARDIS, he'd do more than try to taunt him with brief glimpses…

He couldn't get bogged down in that train of thought; as he'd been reminded during that mess with Avalon, so long as he could set his own agenda and think for himself, whatever they attempted to do to his timeline didn't matter while he was here to counter it.

Currently, the Doctor and Amy were enjoying the opportunity to relax in the TARDIS as they discussed some of the Doctor's old journeys; after seeing friends die, the Doctor felt that Amy could do with a reminder of what they were out here to see. He was in the middle of discussing his old quest for the Key to Time and some of his experiences during that search- the robotic parrot had been a rather amusing incident, even if his confrontation with Cessair had been a frustratingly close call- when he was interrupted by what sounded like someone knocking on the TARDIS's door.

"What was that?" Amy asked, looking sharply in the direction of the knock.

"The door," the Doctor said, walking slowly towards the doors. "It knocked."

"But… aren't we in deep space?" Amy asked, looking uncertainly at him as she moved from her position against the console railings.

"Very, very deep," the Doctor confirmed, as the knocking was heard once again, maintaining its original pace. "And somebody's knocking…"

With nothing else to do, the Doctor reached out and opened the door, revealing a small glowing box floating outside the ship, illuminated from inside.

"Oh, come here," the Doctor said, reaching out towards the cube. "Come here, you scrumptious little beauty-!"

As he reached out for the box, just as his hand was in position underneath it, the cube suddenly whizzed past him into the ship, but subsequently zoomed back towards the Time Lord to strike him in the chest, the blow sending the Doctor reeling backwards before he grabbed the box in his hands.

"What is that?" Amy asked, hurrying over to help him to his feet as he stared at the object in his hands.

"I've got mail!" the Doctor said, unable to take his eyes off the box as he stood up, virtually ignoring Amy's hand on his arm. "I've got mail…"

Amy didn't even have time to talk to him about it before her friend had turned to run towards the console, rapidly adjusting controls with one hand as he held the cube in the other.

"It's a Time Lord emergency messaging system; I used it myself to end the War Games," he explained eagerly. "In an emergency, we'd wrap up thoughts in psychic containers and send them through time and space; give them all available information about the danger and request immediate assistance. Anyway, there's a Time Lord out there, and it's one of the good ones!"

"But… you said there weren't any Time Lords left…" Amy asked uncertainly, recalling the tales he'd told her of Gallifrey's destruction.

"There aren't any left in the universe, but the universe isn't where we're going!" the Doctor proclaimed gleefully, tossing the box to Amy as he accelerated his work on the console. "See that snake? The mark of the Corsair. Fantastic bloke; he had that snake as a tattoo in every regeneration. Didn't feel like himself without the tattoo. Or herself, a couple of times. Ooh, she was a bad girl!" (Particularly considering that most Time Lords chose not to regenerate across genders unless they had to for some reason; it was always harder to adjust to a gender other than the one you were born with, which made the Corsair's ability to adapt to such changes an eccentric even by the standards set by other renegades).

With that explanation provided, he adjusted the last setting on the console and set the ship in motion, a brief explosion at the console marking the start of their progress.

"What's happening?" Amy asked, clutching the edge of the console as the TARDIS suddenly shook around them.

"We're leaving the universe!" the Doctor proclaimed gleefully.

"How can you leave the universe?" Amy asked.

"With enormous difficulty, particularly when we're trying to go somewhere specific!" the Doctor explained, even as he studied the controls before him; he had better control that Tegan and Nyssa had when they were doing this in the aftermath of his fourth regeneration, but he didn't want to delete anything too important after all the other damage the old girl had sustained over the centuries when he had no easy way to replace damaged components. "Right now I'm burning up TARDIS rooms to give us some welly. Goodbye, swimming pool, goodbye scullery, sayonara, squash court seven!"

As he raced around the console, working as hard as he could to keep the ship on the move without losing his connection to the universe he was leaving behind, the destination finally became obvious, sensors picking up a strange solo planet that could only be where the messenger cube had come from…

Finally, the ship came to a jolting halt, knocking Amy off-balance and forcing the Doctor to duck before the time rotor came to a halt.

"OK… where are we?" Amy asked, looking uncertainly at him.

"Outside the universe," the Doctor said with a grin. "Where we've never, ever been."

His enthusiasm for the chance to explore something new was cut short when the interior lights suddenly dimmed, the power in the TARDIS suddenly draining down to nothing. For a moment, the Doctor thought that he'd lost the connection to the remaining Eye of Harmony fragments, but a quick check confirmed that the link Compassion had created in her last moments remained intact; the power was still getting through, but the TARDIS had no means of processing it…

"Is this meant to be happening?" Amy asked, looking anxiously at him.

"No…" the Doctor said, anxiously studying the controls, trying to find another explanation for what was happening and failing miserably. "Everything's been drained… but that's impossible…"

"Why?" Amy asked. "I thought you told me that the TARDIS drew power fromsome black hole your people trapped-"

"And I took care to secure the connection to the remaining fragments when we started to leave the universe; we shouldn't have lost this much power this quickly," the Doctor said, shaking his head as he stared at the console. "It's as though the matrix, the soul of the TARDIS, just vanished… but where would it go?"

After taking a moment to study the console before confirming that there was nothing more he could do, the Doctor sighed and shook his head as he looked up at Amy. "There's nothing we can do from here; we're going to have to get out and see where we are."

"Is that safe?" Amy asked.

"Before the power went down, I confirmed that the environment was habitable for us," the Doctor clarified, before he opened the door to reveal what he could only consider a vast junkyard, filled with components that he immediately recognised as spaceship parts even if the precise make and model eluded him.

"So… what kind of trouble's your friend in?" Amy asked, as she followed him outside.

"He was…" the Doctor began, before shaking his head in frustration; he'd invested too much time in training Amy to lie to her about something minor like this just to save face. "I don't know; he was talking about danger, but he apparently didn't have the time to give specifics."

"Ah," Amy said, before taking in her surroundings. "What is this? The scrap yard at the end of the universe?"

"Not end of, outside of," the Doctor corrected.

"OK, how can we be outside the universe?" Amy asked, still looking confused as she stared at him. "Isn't the universe… well, everything?"

"Imagine a great big soap bubble with one of those tiny little bubbles on the outside," the Doctor said, placing an arm around Amy's shoulders as he spoke.

"OK…" Amy said thoughtfully.

"Well, it's nothing like that, but it's a good analogy," the Doctor said, stepping back to examine the TARDIS again, placing one hand on the door to confirm the lack of the usual thrum that indicated the ship's continued existence. "Completely drained, look at her…"

"So… we're essentially in a tiny bubble universe on the outside of the bigger bubble universe?" Amy asked, examining what looked for all the world like a discarded washing machine.

"Essentially, no, but if it helps, yes," the Doctor said, taking in his surroundings once again, picking up a rock to test the gravity. "The place is full of rift energy; she'll probably refuel just by being here. Now, this place, what do you think, eh? Earth-normal gravity, breathable air, but it smells like…"

"Armpit?" Amy asked, sniffing the air experimentally before looking at their surroundings. "And where did all this stuff come from?"

"Rifts; now and then, stuff gets sucked through them," the Doctor said. "This isn't a bubble, it's a plughole with things getting sucked into it-"

"Thief!" an unfamiliar voice suddenly called out. "Thief! You're my thief!"

Turning to look at the source of the voice, the Doctor just had time to see a woman wearing a pale blue dress that looked like it had been thrown together at the last minute, thick dark hair practically piled above her head in a manner that looked as though it had never been brushed, pointing at him with an air of desperation about her.

"She's dangerous!" another, weaker voice said as the woman grabbed the Doctor's shoulders. "Guard yourselves!"

"Look at you; goodbye!" the woman said, staring at the Doctor in enthusiastic desperation. "No, not goodbye, what's the other one?"

The Doctor didn't have time to answer before she suddenly leaned over and kissed him, lips pressed together as though she had no real idea what she was doing, simultaneously inspiring something in the Doctor he hadn't felt in as long as he could remember…

"Watch out!" a male voice said, as the woman was suddenly pulled away from him. "Careful, keep back from her!"

As the woman was taken away, the Doctor noted that the other two speakers were an unfamiliar man and woman dressed in an assorted patchwork of clothes; the man was wearing a blue soldier's uniform and had with the right sleeve replaced and cloth draped over his right ear, while the woman was wearing a tatty dress and cardigan that gave the impression they'd also been assembled with whatever materials were available.

"Welcome, strangers, lovely," the man said, smiling sheepishly at them. "Sorry about the mad person."

"Why am I a thief?" the Doctor asked, looking at the woman as she took in her surroundings with sudden jerky movements of her head; it might be rude, but he was curious what was motivating her actions. "What have I stolen?"

"Me," the woman said. "You're going to steal me- you have stolen me- you are stealing me- tenses are difficult, aren't they?"

"Oh, we are sorry, my dove," the older woman said, sounding tired as she looked at the Doctor, the woman reaching over to examine Amy's hair in a childish manner before walking past his companion. "She's off her head. They call me Auntie."

"I'm Uncle; I'm everybody's uncle," the man said, as the two shook hands with the Doctor and Amy before he indicated the unnamed woman in blue. "Just keep back from this one, she bites!"

"Do I?" the woman said. "Excellent."

The Doctor didn't even have time to react when the woman lunged forward and bit down on his neck, the Time Lord yelling out in pain before the other two strangers pulled the woman away.

"Biting's excellent!" the woman said, ignoring the Doctor's yells of pain as she looked at Amy (He suddenly wondered if she was like some overly-sensitive agent of the Remote, responding to brief comments as opposed to detailed signals, but shied away from that thought; thinking of the Remote brought back memories of Fitz and Compassion). "It's like kissing, only there's a winner!"

"Sorry," Uncle said. "She's doolally."

"No, I'm not doolally; I'm…" the woman began, humming as she tried to find the right word. "I'm… it's on the tip of my tongue. I've just had a new idea about kissing. Come here, you!"

"Hey!" Amy said, stepping forward to stand between the Doctor and the woman as she started to move towards him, the Doctor ducking behind Amy to escape another potential 'assault'. "You don't just-"

"You're angry," the woman said, suddenly coming to a halt as she looked thoughtfully at him. "No, you're not… you will be angry. The little boxes will make you angry."

"Sorry?" the Doctor asked, moving past Amy to look at her directly, struck by the strange woman's suddenly more solemn manner. "The little what? Boxes?"

"Your chin is hilarious!" the woman said, the solemn mood vanishing as she laughed, reaching out to take a hold of the chin in question, before looking over at Amy. "It means the smell of dust after rain."

"What does?" Amy asked.

"Petrichor," the woman said.

"Uh… I didn't need to know that," Amy said.

"You will," the woman said, smiling simply at his friend.

"Idris, I think you should have a rest," 'Auntie' said.

"Yes, yes, good idea!" the woman who was apparently 'Idris' said. "I'll just see if there's an off switch."

With that bizarre statement, the woman collapsed to the ground, the Doctor and Amy hurrying over to examine her.

"That's it," Uncle said dismissively. "She's dead now; so sad."

"She's still breathing," Amy said, glaring up at Uncle; regardless of his title, he didn't seem to be expressing that much concern for his 'niece'.

"Nephew, take Idris somewhere she cannot bite people," Uncle said, indicating something behind him. Turning around, the Doctor smiled at the sight of a green-eyed Ood; they might have given him bad news in the past, but he wasn't one to blame the messenger, and he'd enjoyed spending some time with Ood Sigma after freeing the primary brain.

"Oh, hello!" he said, grinning at the creature.

"Uh… what is that?" Amy asked uncertainly.

"It's all right, it's an Ood!" the Doctor said reassuringly as he walked up to the creature. "Oods are good, love an Ood… hello, Ood; can't you talk? Oh, I see, it's damaged; may I?"

After the creature gave him a confirming nod, the Doctor removed the top half of the sphere to examine the Ood's translator, the Doctor only half-paid attention to Auntie's comment about House 'repairing' them as he adjusted the relevant settings. Satisfied that he'd done what he could, the Doctor put the sphere back together and turned it on, only to be shocked as he heard a familiar-yet-unfamiliar voice.

"If you are receiving this message, please help me," the voice said, the sphere glowing green as several voices spoke. "Send a signal to the High Council of the Time Lords on Gallifrey. Help! I'm still alive! I don't know where I am. I'm on some rock-like planet -"

There were other voices behind that message, but Nephew switched off the translator before the Doctor could pick anything up clearly.

"Uh… was that him?" Amy asked.

"No, no, it's picking up something else…" the Doctor said, fighting down the urge to think of the best possible answer to that question; he could hope for the best, but he had to be prepared for the worst. "But that's... That's not possible. That's... Who else is here? Tell me. Show me! Show me!"

"Just what you see," Auntie said. "It's just the four of us, and the House. Nephew, will you take Idris somewhere safe where she can't hurt nobody?"

"The House?" the Doctor repeated, ignoring 'Idris' as Nephew picked her up; he had bigger priorities than a madwoman right now. "What's the house?"

"House is all around you, my sweets," Auntie said with a broad smile, Uncle demonstrating her words by jumping slightly beside her. "You are standing on him. This is the House; this world. Would you like to meet him?"

"Meet… the planet?" Amy repeated sceptically.

"I'd love to," the Doctor said, holding up a finger to halt Amy; aside from the fact that you didn't get a chance to talk with a seemingly sentient planet every day, it might be interesting to learn more about what he'd just heard through the Ood translator.

"What's wrong?" Amy asked, looking anxiously at him as Auntie and Uncle led the way into a cave system. "Were those voices…?"

"Time Lords," the Doctor said, rubbing his fingers thoughtfully before he looked back at her. "It's not just the Corsair. Somewhere close by there are lots and lots of… Time Lords."

It might be a gamble to assume that all of them were like the Corsair- it wasn't like he knew where the Rani and the Monk had been when everything fell apart in those last few days, and those were just the most prominent renegades- but if he could just find another of his race…

"Come, come, come," Uncle said, guiding them through a dark tunnel into a glowing green cavern, girders on the roof giving the impression that this had once been part of something bigger and a pile of junk up against one wall. "You can see the House and he can look at you and he…"

"I see," the Doctor said, peering through a grate in the floor at what lay below; the green glow might be unusual, but there was definitely some form of sentience down there making that stuff move, if his senses were telling him the truth. "This asteroid is sentient."

"We walk on his back, breathe his air, eat his food…" Auntie said

"Smell its armpits," Amy muttered in a low voice, her nose wrinkling at the smell around them.

"And do my will," Auntie and Uncle said simultaneously, in a deep voice that clearly didn't belong to them, both suddenly standing up straight as opposed to their earlier slouches. "You are most welcome, travellers."

"Uh… that's the planet talking, right?" Amy asked, looking at the Doctor for confirmation.

"Yes," the Doctor said briefly, before crouching down to feel the floor below him; it was hard to tell from a small sample, of course, but so far the planet exterior felt fairly normal. "So you're like a... sea urchin? Hard outer surface is the planet we're walking on, while you're the big, squashy, oogly thing inside?"

"That is correct, Time Lord," House replied.

"Ah!" the Doctor said, attention refocused with this positive identification. "So you've met Time Lords before?"

"Many travellers have come through the rift, like Auntie and Uncle and Nephew," House replied. "I repair them when they break."

"So there are Time Lords here, then?" the Doctor asked, turning around to address the two human speakers more directly; they might not be House itself, but it felt saner than talking to thin air.

"Not any more," House replied. "But there have been many TARDISes on my back in days gone by."

"Well, there won't be any more after us," the Doctor said, suddenly grim at the thought. "Last Time Lord. Last TARDIS."

"A pity," House said. "Your people were so kind. Be here in safety, Doctor. Rest, feed, if you will."

As the two 'natives' lowered their heads, clearly released from House's control, Amy looked anxiously over at him.

"Tell me we're not actually staying here, right?" she asked.

"It seems like a friendly planet, literally," the Doctor said, restraining his subconscious apprehension for the moment; he had to investigate the source of those calls before he made a decision one way or the other. "Mind if we poke around a bit?"

"You can look all you want," Auntie said with her usual smile. "Go, look. House loves you."

As Auntie cupped Amy's face with her hands while saying goodbye, the Doctor noted and disregarded the observation that her left hand, far thicker and more muscular than the right, was definitely not that of a woman; he had more important things to investigate right now than what could just be a difficult-to-discuss birth defect.

"Come on, Pond," he said, clapping his hands together to try and feign enthusiasm; everything was up in the air right now and he was going to think positive until he knew otherwise. "We're just going to… see the sights."

He wasn't sure what he was expecting to find, but he was sure that it would be interesting…