Hey guys, I finally finished this chapter! I don't know why, but this is getting harder and harder to write for. Whether it's because I'm nearing the end, I don't know? I wouldn't mind, but I've had this story planned since I posted the first chapter. I know - I really tried to be organised with this story, I'm not sure if it's working though.

As always, I really appreciate you guys reading, alerting and reviewing. You have no idea how much it means to me to see a new alert/review pop up in my inbox. I've already reached over 10,000 hits on this. It's unbelievable, you guys are awesome!

Yes, the end is near - I can't believe how far we've come, but there is still about 2/3 chapters left, plus an epilogue. Yes, I'm actually going to do an epilogue for this story. Again, it's been planned since chapter one.

Enough with the long AN, as always hope you enjoy. Please keep the review coming :)

Blaine and Rachel had been back in New York for a couple of weeks now, and had quickly settled back into their day-to-day routine. Only this time Blaine had tried to distance himself from Rachel as he desperately struggled with his rapidly developing feelings for her. Of course, it was easier said than done as he taught her daughter, but their interactions outside of school had been cut down considerably. He knew that avoiding her like this would be probably causing more harm than good to their friendship, but he was really struggling to think straight – no pun included. He honestly thought that by giving her some space, he'd learn how to control his feelings and would eventually get over what he was deeming as a childish crush. So far it was proving to be easier said than done.

Rachel, meanwhile, had remained true to her word and had been in contact with Quinn and Puck on more than one occasion, Quinn had given birth to baby Daniel days after Rachel had returned to New York, and found that talking to Rachel about her concerns was much easier than talking to Finn. With Rachel, at least she knew what she was going through, their conversations generally ended up being about Rachel and her ever-growing feelings for Blaine though. At first Rachel had denied everything, but she'd forgotten what it was like to have a female friend and how persistent they could be, and Quinn had told her more than once that Rachel was her only source to the outside world, whilst she was busy playing mum and Finn was busy at work. Rachel had profoundly refused to act upon her feelings, terrified of losing Blaine again. She'd also felt Blaine pulling away from her, and by throwing her feelings into the mix, she was scared that she'd push him over the edge and that would be it between them. She'd lost him once before, she wasn't prepared to lose him again.

"Do you think Mr. Blaine will like his present mummy?" Amy asked as they walked to school on the last day before the holidays. It had been snowing for the last couple of days and Amy was making the most of it, running off in front of Rachel in her bright pink wellington boots with matching hat and gloves, and throwing snowballs in front of them. "I think Ella will like her ball, do you think Mr. Blaine will let us take her to park to play with it?"

"I don't know sweetheart," Rachel smiled, "But I'm sure that he'll love his present because it's from you." Amy nodded, content with Rachel's answer, before running off in front again, pausing as they reached the school gates, and she was surrounded by the bigger kids. Although Rachel and Amy didn't celebrate Christmas, Rachel knew that it had always been one of Blaine's favourite holidays, so she decided to buy him a gift to let him know that she would be thinking of him over the holidays when he was away spending it with his family.

"Come on Mummy!" Amy shouted as Rachel caught up with her, "I want to give Mr. Blaine his present before school starts," Rachel giggled quietly as she clasped her daughter's cold hand and they walked into the school building. Once inside, Amy quickly removed her coat and jumped up to hang it on her hanger, she had grown in the last couple of months and had taken great joy in showing both Blaine and Rachel that she could reach it now without having to ask for help. She still had a habit of dropping her hat and gloves on the floor though, causing Rachel to smile as she bent down to pick them up.

"Mr. Blaine!" Amy shouted happily, "We brought you a Christmas present!" Rachel stood up and quickly placed Amy's things into her bag before walking over to join Amy and Blaine.

"I didn't think you celebrated Christmas?" Blaine smiled as Amy took the gift bag out of Rachel's hands.

"We don't," Rachel shrugged, "But that doesn't mean we can't help you to," Blaine smiled at Rachel as Amy held the bag out to Blaine.

"You can't open it yet though," Amy stated as she placed her hands on her hips, "Mummy says you have to wait until Christmas day." Blaine chuckled and nodded as Molly appeared the doorway, smiling at the three of them. She too had become closer to Amy and Rachel thanks to Blaine.

"Molly!" Amy grinned as she ran over to hug her,

"Morning Ames," Molly smiled, placing her hand on the little girl's shoulder, she glanced over at Blaine and Rachel who were stood awkwardly, she rolled her eyes, their strange behavior had stunned her since they had returned from New York. Blaine hadn't said anything to her of course, but Molly was certain that there was something had happened between them.

"Why don't we go inside, and leave mummy and Mr. Anderson to talk?" Molly smiled, Amy nodded and turned to wave to Rachel quickly before following Molly into the already noisy classroom. Blaine and Rachel stood quietly for a couple seconds, Blaine shuffled his feet and swung the bag slightly in his hand, he lifted his eyes and smiled at Rachel.

"Thanks for this by the way, you didn't have to." Rachel smiled and shrugged as she sat down on the bench that was resting against the wall and Blaine joined her.

"It's nothing much, Beth was making Christmas cards last week, and Amy insisted on making one for you," Rachel smiled, pulling out a hand made, extremely glittery Christmas card and passing it to Blaine. "Then she decided that she wanted to get you and Ella a present."

"You bought a present for a dog!" Blaine scoffed, and Rachel rolled her eyes.

"She's five Blaine!" Rachel laughed, "But like I said, it's nothing much. Just a gesture really for the two of you," Blaine smiled and rested his head against the wall deep in thought. Rachel sighed quietly and stared at him. She hadn't felt this awkward with him since they had met up again, and that had been for completely different reasons. She missed her best friend, yet there he was sitting right next to her.

"So, you're leaving tomorrow right?" Rachel asked, breaking the silence, Blaine lifted his head from the wall and turned to face her, nodding slightly.

"Yeah, I'm spending Christmas with the family, then I'm heading over to Lima for New Years," he explained. Rachel nodded and bit her lip, cursing herself for feeling so nervous about something so innocent.

"So, I was wondering whether you wanted to have dinner with us tonight?" Rachel asked, "I mean, we won't be seeing you for a while, and I'm sure Amy is going to miss you." I'm going to miss you, she bit her lip again to prevent spilling out any more words in front of him.

"You know, I'd love to." Blaine started, and Rachel smiled happily at him, but Blaine placed his hand on top of hers and sighed, "But I haven't packed yet," Rachel nodded and smiled back at him, trying to hide her disappointment. They remained like this for a few minutes, Blaine's hand still resting on top of hers, this was as close as they'd been since New York, and Rachel had missed the contact. They were soon distracted from their individual thoughts by a scream coming from Blaine's classroom, seconds later Molly appeared in the doorway. "Sorry to interrupt," she smiled, noticing their clasped hands, "But I could really use your help in here,"

"I'll be there in a minute," Blaine nodded, Rachel removed her hand from Blaine's and got to her feet.

"It's okay, I was going anyway." Blaine frowned as Molly nodded and returned to the classroom, Rachel sighed and turned to walk away, now Blaine felt guilty.

"Rachel, wait – " he sighed, Rachel paused and turned around slowly to face him again, he opened his mouth to speak but wasn't sure what to say to her, he silently cursed himself, he was single handedly ruining their friendship and he hadn't even said anything to her yet. Rachel smiled and took pity on him, stepping forward and hugging him tightly

"Merry Christmas Blaine," she whispered, "We'll see you when you come back." Blaine nodded and continued to hold her as she felt her breath brush against his skin sending shivers down his spine, he inhaled deeply taking in the familiar scent of her shampoo, his chest tightened again and she slowly pulled away, giving him a shy smile, before she turned on her heel to leave the school building. He watched her leave and sighed loudly. Yeah, he really needed this vacation.

Christmas was uneventful for the pair; Hiram and Leroy joined Rachel and Amy as they did at the end of every December, before enjoying Shelby's New Year's party. Blaine however wasn't much company, despite his mother trying to get him involved with the rest of family. It was an Anderson tradition, they avoided each other for the majority of the year, then met up at Christmas and put a front on pretending that everything was okay and that they were the image of the perfect family, it couldn't have been further from the truth, it had been like that for as long as Blaine could remember, and sadly he didn't see that tradition ending anytime soon. By the time New Year's rolled around, both Rachel and Blaine were depressed, no matter how many times the people around them tried to cheer them up.

"So how was your Christmas?" Kurt asked as they walked into Finn and Quinn's house where the former members of New Directions had gathered. Blaine shrugged not really wanting to go into the details, as Kurt guided them into the kitchen.

"That bad huh?" Blaine nodded and poured himself a large drink and downed it in one swift movement.

"You?" Blaine asked, placing his now empty glass back onto the kitchen counter.

"Oh you know, the usual." Kurt shrugged, "Only this Christmas we had Carole cooing over Daniel, she's really taken to being a grandmother, dad seemed to be getting into the swing of things as well." He paused and glanced around him, "I know it's stupid, but I'm all babied out," Blaine stared at his friend and for the first time over the winter holidays started laughing. The evening continued and Blaine found himself easing up slightly, enjoying the company of his friends and the amount of alcohol that was available was also helping him, but he was still not being able to ignore the Rachel shaped hole in the room. It didn't help that Santana and Sam were still grilling on him on his relationship status with Rachel, who knew that they'd be so interested? So whilst everyone else was dancing in the lounge, Blaine was hiding away in Quinn's kitchen.

"Dude, you okay?" he turned around quickly, recognizing the familiar voice of Puck. He nodded and forced out a smile.

"So Sam and Mike told me," Puck shrugged, jumping up to sit on the counter, Blaine's eyes widened as he stared at Puck. Despite the Rachel thing, Puck had always intimidated him, he had a feeling it was probably the height thing, and the stories that Kurt had told him when they'd first met, and well they tend to stick with a guy.

"Oh," was all Blaine could manage to say, Puck smirked and stared at him.

"So have you told her yet?" Blaine frowned and tried to meet his eyes as she slowly shook his head, "Dude, you need to work on that,"

"Why does everybody keep telling me that?" Blaine asked in an exasperated tone, "It's just a stupid crush!"

"Is it really?" Blaine paused, not used to hearing Puck to talk to him like this, "Look, I don't usually deal with all of this emotional crap, but I get it."

Blaine opened his mouth to retort, but he knew it was pointless, Puck was a lot of things, but he was mostly always right. Granted they had never actually been the closest of friends, but Blaine knew that Puck had always cared about Rachel, so by default that had made him pretty okay in his book.

"I don't know what to do," Blaine sighed, "I just miss her so much."

"Rachel was always important to me, I guess you could say that she was the one who got away. It was never our time, what with the whole Finn issue," Puck started, Blaine sighed quietly and dropped his head, "But with you, there was always something different about her she was when she was with you, she was happier."

"Was I really that oblivious in high school?" Blaine finally asked, Puck shrugged and his usual cocky smirk returned to his face.

"Dude, you two were harder to separate than Schue and his sweater vests, when she left you broke down. You have no idea how many times Hummel came crying to me when you wouldn't open up to him." Blaine frowned at Puck, wondering when Kurt and Puck had ever really spoken, as far as he was aware they had never been that close.

"Yeah," Puck nodded, "It was awkward for me as well, but apparently I was the only other person who Rachel was closest to. Finn had his own issues back than, but I think he knew then about how you really felt about her," the kitchen fell silent again, the music drifting in from the lounge. Blaine stood frozen to the spot, and Puck felt considerably awkward, never really being the one to submit to his emotions and comfort those that needed it. But he could tell that his words had really hit home to Blaine.

"Can I ask you something?" Blaine asked quietly, Puck shrugged Blaine took a deep breath and stepped forward, "Why the hell didn't any of you tell me this before?" Puck laughed and jumped down from the kitchen counter, patting Blaine's back.

"You wouldn't have listened anyway," he laughed, as he walked across the kitchen and picked up a bottle of beer from the counter. He removed the lid and took a mouthful, before turning to walk back into the lounge. "It's almost midnight, I wonder if Satan is drunk enough to lay one on me when the ball drops?" He paused in the doorway and glanced back at Blaine who was still stood on the spot. "But seriously dude, talk to her." Blaine nodded slowly, his mouth open slightly, as if preparing to say something else. His phone started ringing from his trouser pocket, and he quickly fished it out, his eyes widening in surprise when he saw Rachel's name flash across the screen.

"That's her isn't it?" Puck smirked. Blaine smirked and held the phone up for Puck to see, "That figures, well now's your chance." He glanced once more at Blaine before leaving him alone once more.

"Rachel, hey!" Blaine said, clicking answer and trying to sound more confident than he was actually feeling.

Rachel wasn't exactly the life and soul of the party either. Not that she usually was, but she had been known to break out Broadway showstoppers when Shelby connected up her karaoke machine, and sing along with Amy in tow. But tonight she was different, despite being surrounded by her family, she felt like something was different. She tried to keep a happy face, if only to assure Amy that she was enjoying herself. For a five year old child, she could be very observant. She sighed quietly and poured herself a large glass of wine before walking back into the lounge and slumping onto the couch.

"Is Mr. Blaine coming mummy?" Amy asked, climbing next to Rachel. Rachel blinked and placed her glass on the table next to her and smiled back at her daughter.

"Not tonight Ames," she noticed the frown on Amy's face and wrapped her arms around her, pulling her into her lap, "He's gone to another party."

"Does he not like us anymore?" Amy asked quietly, Rachel carefully began running her fingers through Amy's soft brown hair, trying to comfort her.

"Of course he does," Rachel smiled, "Why did you ask that?" Amy sighed quietly and shifted around to look up at Rachel.

"I miss Mr. Blaine," she said quietly, Rachel nodded and kissed Amy's forehead gently.

"I miss him to, Ames," Rachel sighed quietly, holding Amy close to her and resting her own head against hers. She suddenly felt the couch dip next to her, she frowned and lifted her head, spotting her father's sitting either side of her. Hiram grinned at him and passed her Shelby's phone.

"Call him," he stated, Amy sat up and stared at Rachel eagerly.

"Who?" Rachel asked, feigning ignorance.

"Blaine," Leroy grinned, "We know you're both missing him."

"Can we mummy, please?" Amy asked, her mood lightening immediately.

"He's at Quinn's party," Rachel stated, shaking her head.

"Rachel, it's almost midnight, call him and wish him a happy new year." Hiram ordered, thrusting the phone into Amy's eager hands. Amy giggled and jumped down from Rachel's lap and started tugging at Rachel's hands, excitedly pulling her towards the kitchen. Hiram and Leroy laughed loudly as Rachel followed Amy.

Amy giggled loudly as Rachel picked her up and sat her on the counter, before she dialed Blaine's number, she put it on loudspeaker and handed it back to Amy, it rang a few times, and Rachel's heart sank, believing that he really was to busy enjoying himself with their friends from Lima to think of her. Then he answered.

"Rachel, hey!" Amy's eye's sparkled, and it touched Rachel to see just how much this man meant to her daughter.

"Mr. Blaine, when are you coming home?" Amy asked.

"Amy?" Blaine started, "Does your mummy know you're calling me?" Rachel rolled her eyes at his concerned.

"I'm here Blaine, we've got you on loudspeaker," she smiled.

"So, when are you coming home?" Amy demanded.

"I'll be home in a couple of days," Blaine chuckled, "Are you having fun at your grandma's party."

"Yeah, Beth has been showing me what she learned at her dance class," Amy explained, "Grandpa said I'm really good."

"I'm sure you are, I can't wait to see it," Blaine chuckled again, Rachel smiled and leant against the counter, watching as Amy spoke animatedly with Blaine, informing her of what she'd been up to over the holidays, and yet again Rachel was incredibly grateful to Blaine for humouring her daughter.

"Amy, sweetie. The fireworks are going to start in a minute, do you want to come and watch them?" Shelby shouted through to the kitchen, Amy grinned and practically threw the phone at Rachel as she clambered from the counter and shouted a hasty goodbye to Blaine before scurrying into the lounge. Rachel laughed quietly and switched off the loudspeaker and placed the phone to her ear.

"Sorry about that," she smiled, "Apparently the fireworks are too good to miss,"

"Yeah, Finn and Sam are setting ours up outside now," Blaine commented, there was pause as the two of them waited for the other to speak, Blaine took a deep breath before taking the plunge.

"So how have you been?"

"Did you have a good Christmas?" Rachel let out a nervous laugh as she heard Blaine speak over her, Blaine chuckled lightly and Rachel realized just how much she'd missed his laugh, up until now she'd had no idea what it did to her.

"Oh, you know what my family are like," Blaine sighed, there was a pause again and Blaine rubbed a hand through his hair in frustration, he couldn't remember ever having this much trouble with words before. His mind flicked back to the end of his junior year when he'd told Kurt that he loved him, it was so easy, it just slipped out. But this was a bigger deal, this could change everything.

"Dude, we're almost ready, you coming?" Puck shouted, poking his head through the kitchen door, Blaine nodded and blindly followed him out into the garden, joining everyone else on the grass.

"So how's the party going?" Rachel asked,

"Yeah, everyone's here," Blaine grinned, they all turned to face him and he smiled holding the phone up in the air.

"Happy new year Rachel!" they shouted, Rachel giggled as she heard the countdown starting the other room.

"FIVE!" Puck and Kurt stared at Blaine, urging him to tell Rachel the truth, he bit his lip and nodded.

"Listen Rachel, there's something I need to tell you, it's kind of important," he started, Puck and Kurt smirked at him and turned back to watch Finn and Sam put the finishing touches to the display.

"FOUR!"

"What is it? Is everything okay?" Rachel asked, the volume in the other room getting considerably louder, she quickly jumped down from the counter and slammed the door shut.

"THREE!"

"Yeah everything's fine Rachel. I just…I miss you so much!"

"TWO!"

"I miss you to," Rachel smiled, her heart beating fast against her chest

"ONE!"

"I love you Rachel,"

"I love you Blaine!"

"HAPPY NEW YEAR!"

"I'm sorry your call has been disconnected due to a high usage at this time, please try your again later,"

"Dammit!"

It was the Saturday before school was supposed to start up again, Blaine had only been back in New York for a day, deciding to stay on at the Hummel's with Kurt and fly back with him, instead of returning on his own and dealing with what had happened at New Years. He hadn't spoken to Rachel since that night, they'd struggled to get a connection after their fist initial call, and Blaine was too embarrassed to call her the next day to see if she'd actually heard anything that he'd said to her. He sighed as he walked through the quiet streets with Ella, he'd decided to take her out for a long walk this morning, since he hadn't been around for a couple of weeks. What he wasn't expecting however was to return home and find Rachel and Amy sat on his doorstep.

"Rachel, what are you doing here?" Blaine asked, fumbling in his pocket for his keys, Rachel shrugged as Amy ran forward started stroking Ella happily.

"We thought we'd come by and see you," she smiled as Blaine unlocked the door and gestured for Amy and Rachel to head on inside. Rachel removed Amy's coat as Blaine unhooked Ella's leash and dog ran off into the kitchen with Amy happily following behind. Rachel chuckled and removed her coat and perched on the edge of Blaine's sofa.

"Coffee?" Blaine asked, Rachel smiled and shook her head politely.

"Can we talk?" she asked, Blaine gulped, so she had heard? Now she was going to try and let him down gently.

"Um sure," he nodded, sitting down beside her, Rachel shifted her body so she was facing him directly, she placed her hands in her lap and stared at them.

"Um, okay. Have I done something to upset you?" she asked quietly, Blaine frowned and stared at her.

"Of course not!" he smiled leaning forward and placing his hands on top of hers, she lifted her head and glanced at him, smiling slightly, "Why did you think that?"

"I don't know," Rachel shrugged as Blaine squeezed her hand gently, "It's just, okay. Since we both returned from Lima, you've been different with me. Almost like you're avoiding me." Now Blaine felt plain guilty. He scooted over and placed his arm around her shoulders.

"You could never upset me Rachel," he smiled, "I guess I just let things get on top of me before the holidays," he paused and stared at her, "But everything's fine now," he told her. Rachel smiled as she turned to hug him, pressing her body closely against his.

"I've missed you," she whispered, I just wish you knew how much I love you.

"I've missed you to," he said quietly. I love you more than you'll ever know.

They remained like this for a while, both of them content to stay in this private bubble without having to admit to their feelings aloud. It hurt them both that they'd admitted it once before yet the other was still oblivious to it all. But for now they were just happy to have each other back again.

Coming up: Puck comes to NY to finally meet Beth (Yay!), he also tries to help Blaine and Rachel, with the added help of Amy and Kurt :)