A/N: Thank you everyone for the continued to support. I hope you enjoy this chapter. :)

I assumed here meant home, not my home of course, her home. So that is where I find myself now and I am so relieved I didn't get that wrong. My palms are sweaty and my heart racing away as I now sit opposite her on the couch in her front room.

Ok this is so much more awkward than I thought it would be.

My mouth is dry and I only notice when I get the urge to cough.

I wonder if she feels uncomfortable too?

I know I need to make the first move here, open up and start talking like I said I would in my text but the situation is so awkward. Our greeting at the door was uncomfortable and quick and has just led to us sitting opposite each other in this deadly silence as we are now.

"So?" she asks whilst I am mid thought on how to begin and it has taken me a little by surprise.

"So" I repeat shyly whilst quickly wiping my sweaty palms on the denim of my jeans.

"Start explaining" she gently snaps and it has set the mood.

Right she was clipped and sharp then, her patience is wearing thin. I swallow hard and open my mouth again ready to start talking but only inhale a deep, deep breath.

I wipe my hands on my jeans again, they are so clammy and spot her watching me. I really have no idea how she is keeping so cool and calm. I am a wreck. Where do I start? What do I say to her?

I take another quick deep breath and stop musing. Just do this, I tell myself. Go with what you feel in your heart. Speak, just speak!

"As I have already told you, I umm, I love you" I choke out unpleasantly.

She is staring right at me.

"Yes, so you keep saying" she huffs out as if she is bored and I know I need to move on and quickly.

I watch her, distracted for a second as she tucks a stray strand of hair behind her ear. So poised still even if she is a little agitated.

"and well its not my fault. I mean well it is but I didn't mean for it to happen. Well I mean I did, well wanted it to...I..." I stutter and stumble getting the words out.

Way to go here!

I'm not making a mess of it at all.

She raises an eyebrow slightly and my eyes drop to her lap where she seems to be pushing a ring around her finger. My mind I find it wandering, wondering where she got that from but I am soon interrupted and pulled back from my thoughts into the room.

She has only coughed to bring back the focus to the grovelling and explanation I am supposed to be giving her. I look back up and into her eyes. Big mistake and I quickly look away. That stare is so intense.

"How? How did it happen?" She asks me gently.

I am a little lost for words. This is just as hard as trying to write an explanation down. How do you explain the fact that it just sort of happened. It developed I suppose. I mean I'm pretty sure I didn't just wake up one morning and was like just in love with her like that , or was I?

Oh this is all such a confusing mess.

"Well it just sort of developed" I explain, sheepishly looking up at her and shrugging also.

"Developed?" she questions.

I nod like one of those little nodding dogs.

"Explain" she sort of demands but in a quiet and reserved voice.

I notice she is still twirling that ring around her finger. Is she nervous? I know I am.

Right explain, I psych myself up. Ok this cannot be that difficult. Remember follow your heart, just get the words out, don't think to much, just talk.

Another deep breath and then I find myself talking away unable to stop.

"Well I met you and being friends was great but then we started talking all the time. You kinda opened up and I just wanted to be there for you, I wanted to help. And then well things went a little bit wrong for me and you were nice. You were there you talked to me. You helped. That means so much to me."

I break for a long breath realising I mumbled most of that and didn't breath very well as I rushed to get it all off of my chest, and that is just the start.

She is just staring at me.

Ok maybe she isn't satisfied, so I keep going.

"Then well we had a connection and well, there isn't really anyone else in my life like you. No one who listens or understands like you and I like to think I help you and understand you too. All I really want is for you to be happy. I like your smile, its really pretty."

I shut up then. Oops, was that maybe too far?

My head snaps up to look at her half expecting to find her glaring at me but she's not, she has her head down.

I cough awkwardly in a bid to get her attention.

"Carry on" She mumbles but in a firmish tone.

A little taken by surprise at her reaction I quickly try to continue.

"And erm, I think you are a really beautiful person inside and out and I think you are good and loving. I think you really deserve to be happy. I just want to take away all your pain."

I stop again there feeling a little over emotional myself.

There is a hard and large lump in my throat and I actually feel like all the oxygen is being sucked out of the room. For fear I have made things worse and worried by her silence, I quickly pull myself up off of the couch.

My heart has been stomped on a few times now and I won't survive it again I know I won't. That is why I reserve my feelings until I really trust someone. I definitely regret admitting them this time, like all the times before. Before anything else can go wrong I flee. The pain I am beginning to feel and the looming of rejection all too close for comfort.

I can't take it.

I leave before she can stop me or I convince myself that it isn't such a good idea and I run. Destination unknown.