Death: Hello guys! Sorry that I'm like a week overdue. Busy with truckloads of english assignments. :P THIS IS NOT THE LAST CHAPTER. Those who care to stick around for one more month will be rewarded with an exclusive bonus chapter where we interview all of the Akatsuki together. :D

"Hello people of the living. I had a little chat with Life up there yesterday and he allowed this special guest to be lucky enough to join us for today. We'll be interviewing Zetsu, the Akatsuki's most trusted spy." Death began. "Zetsu, do you have anything to say before we start?"

"Yeah, don't get me mixed up with this idiot. Hey! That hurts! What do you mean? I didn't even touch you. My feeling are hurting that's what." White Zetsu pouted while Black Zetsu just scowled at his other half.

"Fair enough." Death nodded. "Question one. What are your hobbies?" Death asked.

"Why, observing unique human specimens of course! They taste the best!" He chided.

"I'm sure they do." Death smirked. "Question two. What are your favorite foods?"

"Humans! People!" They cheered. Death smiled.

"Alright, Question three. From Midnight Aravell. Can you talk to plants? If you can, what kind of evil things are they thinking to rule the world?" Death asked aloud as she read off the paper.

"Yes, yes we can! They particularly don't like it when you play recklessly around the park and not know what you step on. Please raise awareness, otherwise we will begin translating everything that reaches our ears. Our cousins aren't exactly the polite, quiet confession that you pluck out of the ground to offer your human spouse. Yeah, they're plotting your imminent death as we speak! But, we won't rat out a friend. After all, the human race is sure to all come to an end some day right?" Zetsu concluded.

"Yes, actually. The countdown has just begun." Death glanced at the watch coiled around her wrist. "Anyway, moving on to question four, from Storyteller. Hey, have you ever heard of the classic childhood story called the 'Birds and the Bees'?"

All of the sudden, Zetsu shot up from his chair looking like he just got his ass snipped by a weed-whacker.

"It is an abomination to all plant kind! Yeah! Leave us out of your gross human sexual reproduction!" Zetsu protested.

"Yo, don't say that to us. We're all already dead here." Death stated. Zetsu, then turned and directed the lecture towards your screen with a thorny, pointed finger. "Anywho, please take a seat so we can continue." She gestured.

"Oh, OK." Zetsu sat back down.

"Question five, from ARandomKidInTheFourthGrade. Hey Zetsu, how does pollination work?" Death knit her eyebrows at the asker's name, then proceed to roll her eyes in a, whatever kid, kind of manner.

"A-Ah... Well... Uh... I'm out of this. You see, when male plant is ready, he releases a certain, uh, potion into the air where good old wind, water, or insects will carry it over to the waiting female who eagerly receives the potion. She delicately applies it to her own mix of the potion and bottle and places the genetic material into seeds that she gracefully scatters about on the dirt floor for them to grow in adult plants. Mommy plants have many ways of doing this, but I won't go into detail. Besides, it's quite rude to watch and stare at a plant going through his or her hormones. And that's how baby plants are made! Happy?" Zetsu explained.

"Yeah, I'm sure you are quite the romance novelist here. Moving on to question six, from Druidical. Zetsu, if you pollinate then you must have both a male and female plant part. Which is the male and which is the female part, Black Zetsu or White Zetsu?"

"Excuse me? How rude of you! Well, to answer your question Black Zetsu is actually the fe- No! Shut up, right now!" Black Zetsu slammed his part of the arm onto White Zetsu's mouth. White Zetsu pouted silently to himself.

"Ok... Question seven, from WowRude. How do the rest of the Akatsuki feel about you pollinating?"

"Goddammit! Do you humans have anything better to do than ask us these sick questions? They like to pick at our flowers, especially Konan, but she's nice so we aren't too tempted to eat her. Plus, she helps us preen during the summers, so it's all good. Sasori doesn't seem to care, Deidara has allergies, Kakazu keeps on asking if they are even worth anything, Pein is fine as long as Konan's happy, Tobi likes it, and the rest are fine with it." Zetsu answered.

"Alright, lucky for you guys there are no more questions on that topic. Now for question eight, from LovelyBunchOfCoconuts. Who is you favorite person to spy on in the Akatsuki and why?"

"Tobi. Because he's really interesting. He's always getting into these crazy things, from peeking inside the woman's bathroom, to nearly jumping off a cliff from glee. The little guy needs someone to watch out for him after all."

"Oh, so you two are like guardians. Well, guardian considering that you each share one body." Death acknowledged.

"Well, yes. Correct." Zetsu nodded.

"Isn't that sweet. Anyway, question nine from Generosity. Since you are the spy of the Akatsuki, what odd quirks about the members have you noticed over the passed years that you were with them?"

"All of them? Well, there's lots about them that are very interesting. Interesting enough for us to stick around. Sasori says he has no emotions with that puppet body, but Deidara still manages to piss him off quite a bit. Deidara is quite the scared sissy when it comes to girls. That nervous wreck. Itachi... Just really loves is brother and really tries to do everything for him. It's actually kinda sad that he could never tell him how he felt until he met his end. Kisame constantly gets himself involved with protests against restaurants that sell sharks fin. It ends badly usually... For the restaurant. Hidan is self-explanatory, he swears constantly yet considers himself to be a religious man. Kakazu doesn't get involved with anything unless it has something to deal with money. Pein has this huge crush on Konan, and secretly wants to ask her out. Too bad he never got the chance though. Yeah, sucks. Konan is a real sweetheart once you get to know her, though she can be a little cold towards outsiders sometimes. She's like all of our mothers. Yeah, don't know what we'd do without her actually. Chaos. Utter chaos. Tobi's fun. Although sometimes his fun-time gets a little out of hand once in a while." Zetsu answered.

"Hm... Seems like you guys know a lot about the members." Death complimented.

"Yes, of course. After all we are their most trusted spy like you said earlier."

"Yes. Last question, from Peak. What is the best part about being in the Akatsuki for you two?"

"All of the interesting people of course!" They agreed. Death chuckled.

"Alright, that was Zetsu everybody. Join us next time for an exclusive bonus interview where we ask all of the Akatsuki for a nice group reunion. Should be fun." Death signed off.

"Oh, boy. What fun!"

Death: Please post questions in your wonderful reviews on what you want to ask ALL of the Akatsuki. They are really well appreciated. Ask us anything! :D