' So close no matter how far
Couldn't be much more from the heart
Forever trusting who we are
And nothing else matters
Never opened myself this way
Life is ours, we live it our way
All these words I don't just say
And nothing else matters
Trust I seek and I find in you
Every day for us something new
Open mind for a different view
And nothing else matters
Never cared for what they do
Never cared for what they know
But I know
So close no matter how far
Couldn't be much more from the heart
Forever trusting who we are
And nothing else matters
Never cared for what they do
Never cared for what they know
But I know
I never opened myself this way
Life is ours, we live it our way
All these words I don't just say
And nothing else matters
Trust I seek and I find in you
Every day for us something new
Open mind for a different view
And nothing else matters
Never cared for what they say
Never cared for games they play
Never cared for what they do
Never cared for what they know
And I know
So close no matter how far
Couldn't be much more from the heart
Forever trusting who we are
No nothing else matters '
I could hear Nothing Else Matters by Metallica playing from outside of my house as I woke up from my deep sleep. I looked over at my alarm clock beside my bed. 2:30 a.m. What the hell was Josh still doing up? We had arrived here around 8:00 p.m. and I decided to hit the sheets at 10. I thought he was going to bed too. Guess not. But I still don't understand why he's still up. I got up out of my bed and made my way downstairs and to my patio outsid beside the pool . I could see Josh sitting out there on one of the lounge chairs just listening to the music with a can of Coors Light in his hand. I made my way over to the radio and shut it off.
"What are you still doing up?" I asked. I saw him stretch his arms some and put down his beer.
"Just thinking." He said. "Couldn't sleep for thinking." He yawned. I went over and sat on the end of the lounge chair he was sitting on and turned his direction.
"Is something bothering you Josh?" I asked him. He sighed in frustration and looked down not saying anything. I put my hand on his muscular arm and spoke extremely soft. "What is it, baby?" I asked him looking into his eyes. All I saw was sadness. This broke my heart. He sighed and scratched his head then cleared his throat as if he were fighting back emotions then he licked his lips and bit his bottom one.
"Aubrey's not mine." He said and scratched his goatee. What the fuck. I was in complete shock.
"What are you talking about?" I asked.
"She's not mine. I did the math. Around the time she was conceived, I was in Japan. We hadn't had sex in a long time." He said.
"Oh my God, Josh. I'm so sorry." I looked up at him this time and I saw tears forming in his eyes. Oh God. This killed me. I hadn't seen him cry since the day he told me we had to break up. This was just pure pain I could see. He had put his all into his relationship with Ashley and she betrayed him.
"I wanted so bad for that little girl to be mine. I thought I'd had another chance and love and this would secure us." He sighed. I put my hand on his shoulder.
"Don't be rash about it just yet, Josh. You could be wrong about it. Aubrey could still be yours." I gave him a little smile.
"Yeah I guess she could. We'll see I guess. I just have a funny feeling about it." He sighed.
"It'll be okay, Josh. Just go get some sleep." I told him.
"Yeah, I guess you're right." He got up and hugged me and kissed my cheek. "Thanks for being a great friend, Jamie." He smiled. "You're the best." He went inside and upstairs to my guest bedroom. I sighed. I never thought I'd hear the words come out of his mouth many years ago. I was just his 'friend'. I sighed and went upstairs to my room and laid on the bed just thinking about my life.
It was a long sleepless rest of the night and my alarm clock just sounded off. I walked down to the kitchen and Josh was sitting on the counter in some jeans, a TNA t-shirt, some Jordans, and a MCMG beanie. He looked adorable to me. He was sitting there eating an apple and talking on the phone.
"Yeah man, yeah, you just take care of that foot and worry about the Guns later bruh. Jeff isn't worried right now so you just rest up." He said and right away I could tell that he was talking to Patrick. He looked over at me and smiled which sent butterflies through my stomach. "Yeah okay bro, I'll see you soon. Alright. Love ya too man. Okay, bye." He said hanging up his cell phone and he sighed putting it down. "Patrick has to have surgery on his foot. He shattered some of the bones in it."
"Damn. I hope he's okay." I said grabbing an apple too. "What about The Guns?" I asked taking a bite of my apple.
"Jeff is making Chris Sabin go into an X-Division title run." He smiled.
"That's so awesome!" I smiled and hugged him.
"Thanks. I'm really excited. But there's something else with it. I don't know how you're going to feel about it and I'm not sure how Ashley is going to feel about it either." He said scratching his head.
"How bad could it be for us not to like it?" I ask.
"They want you and me to be a couple on screen since Patrick and Ashley are both out. They were already planning on putting Ashley in the beautiful people with you and Angel but Angel is also taking some time away so it's just you and I left." He said. This is so amazing but I knew Ashley was going to hate it. She's told me countless times that if they ever decided to put 'Chris Sabin' in a relationship with any other knockout other than 'Madison Rayne' she would have a bitch flip. Well you better start doing your flips Ashley Simmons.
"Oh. Um. Wow. This is. Different." Was all I could get out of my mouth.
"Yeah, but we'll just be as professional as possible about it." He said pushing himself back on his feet from the counter. "Now let's get going to your folk's before we have to go to the arena." He said. I grabbed my purse and the keys and we headed out.
It didn't take long to get to my parent's house from mine. This was the house that I lived in from the time I was born till I was 6 then we moved to Detroit and my parents kept the house and when I graduated high school they decided to move back. I always loved this house. It always felt more like home than any other place in the world. I learned how to walk, talk, ride my bike, learned my ABC's, but most of all, this was a place where my Grandmother would visit me before her tragic death when I was 5. She was my best friend and she was murdered by a man who broke into her house and robbed her. I was devastated and I still miss her every single day.
We got out of Josh's escalade and closed the door. This place never changed and I loved it. I looked up at the front door and saw my mother smiling as she opened the front door. It had been a few months since I'd seen my mother now and she hadn't changed a bit.
"Jamie!" She smiled.
"Mom!" I ran to her and hugged her tight.
"Oh, my baby girl is home. I'm so happy to see you my precious angel." She smiled and kissed my head as I looked up at her and her smile disappeared as she looked out past me. She started to look pissed. What in the fuck?
"Joshua. Harter." She said with some hatred in her voice. "James!" She yelled out for my father who came out of the door. What the hell was going on here.
"What the hell is he doing here?" My dad asked.
"What are you talking about, dad? He's my friend." I said.
"Friend, my ass. You can't be friends with your ex. He did you like dirt, Jamie. Left you for the airforce and never came back." He did have a point.
"Bullshit, James. You know what happened a year later. Oh wait, you didn't tell, Jamie did you?" Josh fought back. This made me look to Josh then back to my dad.
"Tell me what?." I hissed. My dad looked even more pissed then looked at me and softened his look and sighed.
"Tell her, James." Josh yelled. He sighed and looked at me as I gritted my teeth.
"Tell me." I hissed.
"Back whenever Josh got discharged from the military, he came here looking for you and at the time you were out hanging out with Jennifer." He said referring to my sister. My anger was rising. "He wanted you to take him back but I told him that you needed nothing to do with him and that you deserved better and then that was the time that I updated your phone and told you you had to change your phone number." My eyes widened. What the fuck did I just hear come from my father's lips. I couldn't believe me. How in the hell could he do this to me? Josh could have been mine now. I could have been Mrs. Harter. I could have been carrying his baby. Tears of hatred and pain started to escape my eyes and I went over to my dad just hitting him in the chest over and over again.
"How could you do this to me?" I screamed into his face and continued to hit him. I was screaming and crying and I felt Josh's muscular arms pull me back. I just kept hitting until I couldn't anymore then I broke down and he turned me towards him and hugged me tight. This caused me to calm down.
I couldn't believe this shit.