11th September 2014
Once in my modest bedroom, Christian deposits me on the bed and climbs on top of me, kissing me fiercely. We make out for what feels like forever, our breath mixing together, our lips pressed tightly, our tongues exploring each other's mouths. My hands are running down his shoulders and back. His are roaming all over my body. He picks my thigh up, placing it over his hip and breaks away from my lips to kiss my neck. I close my eyes, breathing heavily, trying to absorb all of these very overwhelming feelings at once. As well as intense feelings of pleasure, there is also love.
He takes his time in slowly undressing me, kissing my neck at the same time and whispering little murmurs of reassurance. Once my top is off, he kisses down the hollow of my neck, down to my cleavage as he nuzzles his face between my breasts.
He looks up at me with a grin and I can't help but giggle a little. He's so so gorgeous. Christian takes my bra off with expertise and the way he's looking at me, I don't feel insecure like I thought I would. I feel amazing.
"Stunning" he whispers, before swirling his tongue around my breast and encasing my nipple between his mouth.
"Oh," I close my eyes as sighs of pleasure escape my mouth.
He does this for what feels like hours, his hands also stroking my stomach and thighs, until I feel myself aching...my legs rubbing together to create friction.
"Ana," he murmurs quietly against my skin. His hand trails down, underneath my skirt, touching my most intimate area over my very damp underwear. "Do you want me to touch you baby?"
"Yes." I don't hesitate.
He brings himself back up to kiss me, long deep kisses, while rubbing me gently. And then his hand goes underneath the underwear and I cry into his mouth.
"Do you like that honey?"
"Yeah," I moaning continuously as he continues to keep up his motions.
"Would you like me to try this with my tongue?" He whispers, so quietly, into the space between the end of my neck and my ear.
I gasp a little because I've never had that done to me before. And, I guess, I'm a little naive, I didn't ever think he'd suggest something like that.
"Nobody's ever done that to me before," I say gently.
His hand stills momentarily and he trails his kisses down my whole body.
"Well, then let this be the first."
Christian removes my skirt and panties before I even have time to protest. He spreads my legs as wide as they can go and kisses the sides of my thighs as he takes me all in.
I'm shaking a little, nervous, and then Christian puts his hand up to grab mine, comforting me. I hold it tight within my grasp and I close my eyes and let the sensations wash over my body. It feels foreign, alien, but oh God, so good.
His tongue slowly circles my clit in gentle little motions and I cry out. This is amazing. This is magnificent. There is nothing that compares to this surely. He holds my hands, he squeezes my breasts, he rubs my thighs, all while pressing his mouth against my centre. He kisses, licks, sucks, devours me, until I'm so wet that I feel I'm about to explode. When I feel myself getting close, he eases two of his beautifully long fingers inside of me and I clutch the sheets between my fists and arch my back.
'"So tight," I hear him murmur. "Come for me darling."
His fingers move at a fast pace and they get gradually faster and faster until I scream as I feel myself coming. I shatter beneath him, into a tiny million little pieces.
Minutes, hours, days later he climbs back up my body, kissing every inch of my naked skin until he gets to my lips.
"Do you have any idea how beautiful you look right now?" He asks, hovering over me and pressing his lips against mine tenderly.
I shake my head and smile.
Christian brings one finger up to stroke the side of my face, down to my neck and then into my hair.
"So precious," he whispers. "I hope that felt good."
"It was amazing," I reply quietly. "Nobody's ever touched me like that before."
"I find that hard to believe." He looks at me seriously then. "You're exquisite."
He's still in his clothes and I shrug him out of them until he's in just his boxers. My god he's gorgeous. Toned in all the right places and beautifully tanned. I push us over and roll right on top of him so I'm looking down into his face. We kiss for a while and then I tuck my head underneath his neck. I feel so warm and safe and unexpectedly start to tear up because I've never felt this way before.
"Sweetheart, what's wrong?" He asks, stroking my hair.
"Nothing," I reassure him. "Everything's perfect. Absolutely perfect."
And then I fall asleep in Christian's arms.
I awake a few hours later, around 12am. I'm still in the same position, Christian's arms are still around me and the duvet has been pulled up so I'm toasty warm. It's pitch black now and there's only a flicker of moonlight coming in through the gap in the curtains.
"Are you awake?" I whisper into the darkness.
"I am."
He strokes my hair and I melt into him.
"Did you fall asleep?" I ask.
"For a while."
We're silent for a while then, and there's just the sounds of our hearts beating and the stillness of the peaceful night air.
"You live alone," I say to him. I don't ask the question, I already know it's true.
In the darkness, I can't see his face, and I feel brave enough to speak my mind. I want to know why this beautiful soul is all alone in the world.
"I do," he replies after a moment. "Well, apart from my staff."
"Did you used to live with...someone?" I ask hesitantly.
"Well, I used to live with my family, until I moved out many years ago of course. They still live close. I see them often."
"No...I mean a, um, a lover."
He takes a while to respond and I worry if I've hurt him.
"I've never had a lover."
My heart breaks but then he pulls me closer and kisses the top of my head. "Until you. You're my lover."
The grin on my face is ridiculous. "I've never had a lover either," I reply when my giddiness has surpassed. "Until you."
He considers this. "You haven't? What about..."
I cut him off before he can speak. "Lily's father? He was my high school boyfriend, not my lover. I got pregnant the very first time I lost my virginity. That's the only time I've ever had sex."
"So, you broke up with him after he found out?" He asks.
"Yes. He moved out of the state after telling me to have an abortion," I whisper. "He saw her once but never again. I don't know where he is. We don't stay in touch."
"Ana I'm so sorry," he replies. His voice is strained, full of emotion and I hug him tight.
"It's okay," I assure him. "It's okay."
"No it isn't. It's not okay. He should have been there for you, to help you, to support you, to be there when you gave birth." His voice is angry and I lean up, trying to look into his eyes even in the dark.
"Calm down. It's okay now, I've got you remember?"
He closes his eyes and breathes deeply. This seems to calm him down, at least a little.
"What kind of person could leave their own child?" He says quietly at last. He strokes my face and I can feel the warmth of his fingertips radiate through me. "What kind of person could leave you?"
"He didn't want to be a father. He said he was too young."
"You were young! You still are! And you did it. Why couldn't he?"
"Christian," I murmur sweetly, "he didn't want to."
"You deserve better," he finally says.
"I have better. I have you."
12th September 2014
Christian stays the night but he gets ready to leave around six in the morning. I hug him from behind and kiss his neck as he gets redressed.
"I had the most amazing weekend," I say to him.
He takes my hand over his shoulder and presses a kiss there. "As did I."
"I wish you didn't have to go to work."
He chuckles and spins me around so that I'm now sitting on his lap, facing him.
"I'm a very successful businessman. How would it look if I didn't show up to work?"
"You run your own company. You're the CEO of Grey enterprise holdings." I finger the collar on his shirt. "I'm sure you can do whatever you like."
He smirks.
"So?..." I ask.
"I can, but I have to be professional. My business depends on me."
"You have a much more busy life than I thought," I say with a hint of dismay.
He pulls me closer.
"I don't want to scare you away but my work life is very big. Huge events, hectic work schedule, long hours, there's even paparazzi from time to time. I didn't tell you the extent of my life because I didn't want that to cloud anything right now. Wherever is possible, I like to lead a private personal life. I didn't want you to have to deal with any of that."
I push him down onto the bed and kiss his lips.
"Nothing could scare me away from you Mr Grey."
He smiles and kisses me, but I notice that it doesn't quite reach his eyes all the way.
I see Christian out with a sad smile. His driver, Taylor, is waiting for him and I sigh as I close the door. He leads a very big life, very time consuming. I shall miss him when he's working but I know it has to be done. He's one of the most successful businessmen in the world. I can't believe he's mine.
Lily wakes shortly after. I make us toast and eggs for breakfast before dropping her to Pre School. I head to work and for once, am not excited by the smell of freshly baked cakes and bread. All I want is the soft scent of Christian surrounding me.
"What's wrong dear?" Alison asks, noticing I'm not my usually, cheery, perky self. "Missing the little one?"
I give her a weak smile. "I am."
I don't want to talk about it to anyone right now. I'm feeling mixed emotions. I know I'm falling hard for Christian. I just hope he's feeling the same way.
After work, I pick Lily up and we stop by the bakery so that she can visit Alison. She chatters to her as she eats cookies and milk and as we leave, I promise to bring her by again very soon.
We have a quiet evening. After dinner, Lily watches a Barbie movie on Netflix and on a whim; I look at a few art schools nearby. I close the tabs almost immediately. They're so expensive and also very demanding. I can't work like that when I have such a young child. It's just not possible. I check my phone, hoping it's a message from Christian telling me he's coming over after work.
However, it's a message that tells me he'll be working late and so he'll hopefully see me tomorrow or possibly even Wednesday.
A few tears catch in my throat as I watch Barbie dancing in her pink ball gown with her handsome prince.
Hi guys, thank you so much for all the messages wishing me well, I appreciate them more than you'd ever know. A question I get a lot is about a Christian POV. There WILL be one at some point, i'm just not sure when. Hope you enjoyed the chapter and please review, the reviews bring me happiness and continue me to stay strong and keep writing quicker, thanks so much. - Elizabeth x