Whew I'm back! Sorry about the terribly long wait. A few things have been happening and also because of my laziness. Also the fact that I got a new video game (coughHarvestMooncough) didn't help much either. Well enjoy!

Disclaimer: I do not own Naruto! If I did then Tsunade would PWN every person she comes across! Why? Because Tsunade is my all time favorite Naruto character!

Chapter 10: I will make you forget.

Konan watched in silent anticipation as the female sannin healed Pein. Zetsu had found him collapsed on the ground in Amekagure. She was at her breaking point. Pein had discovered that woman's greatest weakness but Zetsu would not tell her a thing. She was also kept in the dark about the attack in the village. Who attacked and why was under tight wraps. No one that needed to know was kept out of the loop. She was one that "did not need to know".

She hated it. All she could do was wait and hope. Oh how she hated that. She wanted to know theses things so she could act. Not stand off to the side and watch.

"Konan." Tsunade pivoted her head to face the blue haired Akatsuki.

"Yes." Konan's voice was tipped with worry and long awaited anticipation.

"His condition is caused by a malfunctioning artery in his heart. Such a thing is almost extremely hard to discover and could act up at any moment. I believe that mas- that woman did this to him when they first fought."

Konan's eyes widened. "Y-you can fix it right?" Soft tears welled in the corners of tired eyes. "Y-You can save him right?" Tsunade merly hung her head in silent response.

"I don't know. This may be beyond my ability to heal." She admitted ruefully.

"But weren't you that woman's apprentice?" Konan crossed the distance between them and grasped Tsunade's shoulder. "Surely you have some of your master's ability?"

Tsunade stared hopelessly into Konan's crying eyes. Several moments past, neither woman moved or looked away.

Finally Tsunade spoke. "I-I stabilized his condition for now… I…I need to think." With a firm flick of a wrist Konan's hand was brushed off to the side. Tsunade bee lined for the door, not wanting to linger. A soft sob escaped Konan's parted lips as she knelt down beside Pein. She vaguely heard the door close with a whisper of a click.

He was in pain. She could tell by the expression on his sleeping face. Tsunade had given him morphine and sleeping pills for the pain but…. She grasped his hand with her small pale ones and tenderly rubbed the tips of his fingers against her cheek.

"Please, Pein." She whispered. "Please get better for Amekagure. If not for the village then please… get better for me."

Tsunade cursed. She was standing outside the door and heard every word. She wanted dearly to save Pein but… memories of Dan and brother filed her thoughts. She had failed to save them. What if she failed to save Pein? She couldn't save the two most important people in her life, what's to say that she couldn't save this man?

Neglecting her duties to check on the other members she slowly ambled to the base's kitchen. Her mind a flurry of thought and her heart heavy.

She rounded the corner and stepped onto the smooth grey tile floor. The kitchen's bland color scheme of grey did little to appease her mood.

I am a failure. Her own words cut her deeper than any knife. I am a total failure. I am a fraud. A doctor, who kills, not saves.

She let herself fall to her knees in defeat. Her willpower had abandoning her.

What happened to her optimistic attitude? What happened to her determination to fight all enemies of the Akatsuki, including her master? Someone she had once come to regard as a mother figure.

She leaned foreword, her elbows supporting her scrunched body.

What am I to do? I can't save him. I can't even save myself. Living in the memories of Dan and 'lil bro's deaths. Never moving foreword but always stepping back. Am I shrinking away from my true purpose?

The world spun around her as her energy depleted. The white tilted floor came rushing to her face. Or was her face falling towards it.

No… I was never meant to be a doctor. I was never meant to save anyone. One by one the important people on my life are disappearing from me. Grandfather, Mother, Father, Brother… Dan. Am I a bringer of death? Am I a bringer of pain to those I try to save?

Joy, happiness. It meant nothing to her. What's the point? What's' the point to have such trivial emotions. They mean nothing in the end. They entice you with hope and comfort but in the end the joy forgets you. Leaving you to swallow in the pain and hurt.

The cold tile barley registered on her skin. Her nerves were dull. Her emotions muddled and pain filled. She laid there, drowning in her own despair and pain.

I truly am hopeless.

Any sliver of hope that had duitly remind with her was gone. Like a whisper of a cloud in the dry desert.

Is this what it is like to live? To feel joy then the most horrible of pain? Is this truly living?

'Tsunade-Hime'

'Master?'

'Keep your guard up. Never close your eyes. Never turn you back on your opponent'

Tsunade couldn't understand. Was this an illusion? A wraith of her memories?

'Why master?' She heard her younger self reply. Any image there might have been was washed away, leaving only the nonchalant voices.

'Because then you'll survive. And when you survive you will live longer.'

'Why do I want to live so long?'

'What do you mean?' Master's voice scolded. 'If you have no reason to live then you have no reason to train under me. Leave now.'

'Wa-wait! I-I don't understand.'

'…'

'I don't understand what we are supposed to live for.'

'Tsunade. There are many mystious things in this world. This you could never dream to even imagine. Human will to live is one of them.'

'I- I see…'

'Don't lie. Maybe when you are older you will understand.'

The voices faded from her mind. Vanishing into nothing as fast as they came.

We are alive to feel pain. Tsunade concluded. We are alive to feel pain. Pain and nothing else. No mater where we go. Or what we do. Pain will always be with us. We could never hope to escape it. Human kind shall forever be clouded by the wicked fog of pain.

"She's late" Kakuzu grumbled to himself. He was lying in his bed. It was half past noon. Usually Tsunade stopped by around noon but today she has yet to show up. Gah what is he thinking? Worrying like an old mother over her children. He swept clean his mind of his pointless worries.

"I'm sure the others are giving her trouble or something." He reasoned. Even though he thought this firmly he glanced fugitively at the small alarm clock on his bedside table every five minuets.

"That's it." He growled after the checking the clock for the thirtieth time. With little effort he pushed himself out of the bed and walked out of his room.

Tsunade had done her job well. Thanks to her treatments he was almost one hundred percent good again. He stood uncomfotrly in the hallway. Not sure why he was even there in the first place. Why was he getting himself so worked up? This wasn't like him. To be so worried over some woman. He stared at wall, hoping it would give him some idea as to what to do.

Of course a wall being a wall it didn't do much.

"I guess I could get some food." His stomach growled loudly in response. He did turn down breakfast that morning.

'Who knows, maybe I'll find her there.' He thought placidly. His steps were even and smooth as he treads the familiar halls of the main base. He was not twenty feet from the kitchen door when his heard pain filled cry. Soon another ands soon after than sobs came forth like a torrent of rushing water.

He didn't know why. He couldn't understand how but he followed the sound. An unknown force guiding him. His face contorted as he gazed upon Tsunade. Her heaving body sprawled across the floor. Her pale hand covered her mouth, muting her shameful sobs. Again that unknown forced roared up within him. He balked as the unfamiliar emotion welled through him.

He didn't think, only acted. His body moved of its own accorded to her grief stricken figure. His large rough hand against the silky texture of her arm. She quivered under his unexpected touch.

"Relax it's me." He whispered softly.

"I can't do it." She croaked. Her voice hoarse from her crying. "I can't save him." Kakuzu held back that question of who she was talking about.

'Of course' He concluded after a second of thought. 'She's talking about Leader'

"Yes you will." He said firmly. "You are the famous medical ninja Tsunade. If anybody could save him it would be you."

"I can't. I can't." She curled into a tight ball. Hoping to squeeze out the world and choke on her own misery.

"Yes you can." His grip tightened.

And this is how it was. She denied her abilities, she denied being able to save anyone. He comforted her. The words caught on his throat but he forced them out, wanting to help her.

She cried her soul. She didn't cry for Dan or her brother. She cried for herself and he was there to hold and comfort her.

He didn't understand why. What could he gain from her? Defiantly not money. She was hundreds of thousands of dollars in debt. His body acutely registered her shaking and shivering form against his. The warm tears that fled her eyes and on to his chest.

"I still don't understand" Tsunade's voice wafted to his ears.

"Understand what?' he inquired. All five hearts were beating rapidly each at different intervals. Creating a fast rhythmic beat that only spurred the roared emotion within.

"Why we try so hard to live when all we will ever find in life is fear and pain."

"Why we strive to live." He chanted under his breath. Yes he had spent many days wondering that very reason. And long ago he came to the understanding that living for emotion lead you only to your death. In his days before Akatsuki he srove to find something to live for. He didn't find his reason until hiding in a politically ruined country far south of Fire Country. When observing the town he saw death, pain and heartbreak. But he also saw money. The town was loaded in cash and it was always in use. Political leaders would bribe others or mire mercenaries to assinate their enemies.

While the country was in political ruin. Its wealth was flourishing. Kakuzu found then that the only thing you could trust was money.

"Living for emotion gain has become obsolete for me." He mused. "The only thing I could trust is money but…" He trailed off.

Money was all he ever thought about after then. Soon he was found by Zetsu and was enlisted into the Akatsuki where he was assigned position of treasurer. A fitting job for him.

He did his job well. Whether finding deals with cloth for the cloaks or for basic equipment. He even hunted for bounties in his fee time. But now he wasn't so sure. Ever since their lives had intertwined old feelings and emotions had awakened within him. He wanted desperately to stuff these emotions right back where they came from but something stopped him. A part of his mind enjoyed these emotions, vive for the emotions. It was when ever he felt that his hears beat faster into their intoxicating rhythm. He could stand for hours soaking in the emotion.

He… he didn't know what he was. Was he happy? Happy to have these feelings even if it may lead to pain like Tsunade had said?

"But." He continued his voice small, "Maybe it is emotions what humanity strives for. Yes emotion leads to pain and heartache but it never lasts. Humanity lives for the times we feel joy. The pain… makes the joy we feel afterwards even greater."

"There is no joy in mu future." He heaved she fists white as she squeezed his shirt. "I have nothing. No family, no village, no friends, no future. All I have is the pain."

Kakuzu did not know why he said what he said next. "Then I will make you forget." The words surprised him as much it did Tsunade. The drumming beat of his hearts crescendo'ed in side him. It felt as if his whole body was shaking from the force of the wild beat.

"M-make me forget." She breathed into his chest. Kakuzu willed himself to breathe, in and out, in and out. His five heart beats slowed with each breath. With each breath brought more sense and clarity to his mind. With each breath that amazing thought ringed louder in his head.

He loved Tsunade.

"I will make you forget." He repeated. "And I will make you feel joy again. I believe you can save Leader-sama. You lived though so much pain. Pain that made you fear for the lives whose fate is in the palms of your hands. Forget the pain and remember what it means to be alive."

Tsunade was speechless. Was this really Kakuzu talking to her? Was it really the same person? Yes… this is defiantly Kakuzu.

Her Master's words vibrated through her entire being. The memory appearing from a forget corner of her mind.

"This is so stupid." She muttered quietly into his chest.

"How so."

"Master long ago… taught me that a doctor is only as good as she believes herself to be. I can't believe I forgot until now."

Kakuzu contemplated her words lingering over their elaborate details.

"If I don't believe that I could save him then I won't. I remember when D-Dan was dying. I-I doubted myself so much. Every second I watched his pain filled face. I kept thinking. I can't do this, I can't do this. I wanted so badly for him to live. T-To be with me but…" She gritted her teeth. She wasn't going to waste another tear. She was going to be strong.

"What are you going to do?" Kakuzu asked her.

"I'm going to save him."

She couldn't see it but under this mask a small smile pulled at the corners of his mouth.

Tsunade stood in green robes next Peins bed. So was going to perform a heart transplant. She disinfected the whole room and set it up to be prepared for anything that could happen. Sitting in a clear container floating is sickly green fluid was a large healthy heart, courtesy of Kakuzu. The heart had the same chakra nature as Pein so there should be no complications later.

'I can do this.' She tugged the green mask over her mouth. She checked the machine that pumped morphine into his system. Once she was sure everything was in working order she leaned foreword over Pein's drug induced sleeping body.

The surgical scalpel glinted in the bright light as she made the first cut.

'Careful' the automatic remainder pinged in her head. With fast practiced movements she slid the thin silver needle through the thin lays of skin on either side of the first cut. Pulling the string tight as she went she threaded the thin stitches into place. With a final tug and the stitches tied off t the end Tsunade wiped the think sweat of her brow.

Her surgical gloves snapped as she pulled them of and tossed them to the side. She set about tidying up her work area, throwing away used scalps, needles, and wiping the metal surgical instruments free of blood.

A quick glance at Peins chest told her that his breathing was even. The morphine was still in affect. By her reasoning he should wake in an hour or so.

"You may come in now." She said casually." The door slammed open. Konan burst into the room wide eyed. Her anous gaze shifted from Pein to Tsunade.

"Konan-san." Tsunade stepped forward, placed her hand on the blue haired woman's shoulder. "Operation success."

The base was almost empty. Everyone but Konan, Pein Hidan, Kakuzu and Tsunade remained. The others had missions or biju to catch. They couldn't waste another day lingering.

Kakuzu didn't mind though. It was not that he hated the other members, they were alright. Itachi and Sasori especially since they were quiet and did not give him a headache.

That reminds him. Hidan has been acting a little odd lately… He's been so self drawn and…well…quiet. Even his rituals are different. All he dose is pray. No bloody emo rituals, nothing bloody or gory at all. Just praying.

"Kakuzu-san!" Kakuzu saw Konan's blue haired head stick out of Leaders room down the hall. "It was a success!" She exclaimed jubilantly. "Tsunade saved him!"

His heart beat fluttered at the mention of Tsunade's' name. Her blonde hair and fair face with golden brown eyes flashed across his minds eye. But it went by so fast, could he have imagined it. Ever since what he called the "kitchen incident" He didn't know what to think anymore.

"Where is Tsunade?" He asked taking measured strides down the hall.

"The surgery wore her out. Right now she's resting in my room." Konan sent a quick glance into the room before stepping out and closeting the door with a barely audible click. "She did a brilliant job. Only she could have pulled that surgery off."

"She is a famous medical expert." Kakuzu agreed. Nodding once at Konan he stepped past her and continued to walk down the hall.

"Wh-where are you going?' Konan called after him. He stopped dead in his tracks. Konan was hiding something.

"I'm going to go see Tsunade." He said simply.

"W-why?' She questioned at his backside.

'Her heart beat is irregular.' He noted. Even from five feet away her could hear the tell tale signs of lying.

"I wish to commend her on a job well done."

"Y-You can't!" Konan grabbed his elbow keeping him in place.

"Why not." He growled. His patience was dwindling by the second. If he didn't get a straight answer soon he was going to snap.

"I-I….I lied."

He remained silent.

"Tsunade was really sent with Hidan on a month long mission."

Three words could describe what Kakuzu thought right now.

What the Heck.

Heh didn't expect that now did you? Remember at the beginning of the fic I said that this was going to be KakuxTsuna AND HidanxTsuna? Well now it's time we went into the latter pairing. Sorry to those who liked the KakuxTsuna pairing but that will be on hold for oh about… 3 chapters?

Next time! Chapter 11: What is it like to be an immortal?

Tsunade has started her mission with Hidan as a member in training but something doesn't seem right with him. A surprise visit from the past confronts Tsunade when a stop at a hot spring goes terribly wrong!