Thanks again to our AWESOME beta, Maddsgirl75!

Chapter 10

Walking up to the foot of the bed, John's eyes feasted on Elise while at the same time his heart almost ceased to beat in his chest when he saw the extent of her injuries. The stark pain in his eyes tore at Zoe's heart. She wanted to comfort him but didn't think he'd accept it, at least not from her.

Clearing her throat, she quietly said, "Meg..."

Hearing her name, Meg kept her eyes on the machine's readout and answered, "hold on". After adjusting the IV drip she turned toward Zoe expectantly. Nodding her head in the direction of John, Zoe said nothing.

Turning to her left, she saw John standing there. He certainly looked better than he had earlier. His hair was washed but not combed. The cuts and bruising on his face stood out against the paleness of his skin. His split lip was swollen as was his right eye. His light blue denim shirt was unbuttoned and opened. She could see fresh cuts on his chest and on his neck. Looking down she gasped as she saw his hands gripping the foot of the bed. Moving over to him she closely assessed him and knew he needed to be checked out immediately.

"John, I need you to step over here for me so I can make sure you're ok." She tugged on his arm….and got nowhere. He didn't move or even acknowledge that she had spoken. "John, I've got to check you out before you can even touch her. Do you understand me?"

Never moving his head, John turned his tortured eyes toward Meg. "I'm fine." He said quietly.

"No you are not John. You are in shock. You've lost a lot of blood, you have open wounds that need to be treated all over you. Especially on your hands. I'm not going to take a chance that you could spread germs to her. She is very fragile right now and I'm taking no chances. YOU CAN NOT TOUCH HER until I say you can." Meg said in a raised voice. "Do you understand me John Reese?"

Finally turning to face her, John nodded and waited for Meg to take care of him. Indicating an area off to the side Meg walked ahead to uncover the triage set-up she had brought with her from the hospital. For the next thirty minutes she cleaned and swabbed and patched and stitched all over John's body. She knew he was a strong and tough individual who had led a rough, life but she could not believe the sheer number of wounds on his body. She felt that he had broken ribs, but she knew she'd never get him to leave the room for an X-ray. She just bound him up as best she could which seemed to ease his breathing. Stitching up the ninth cut, she told him he looked like the scarecrow from the Wizard of Oz. That brought a slight smile to his face.

The whole time she worked on him he never took his eyes off of Elise. She barely made a bump under the blankets. All he could see was her dark hair spread out on the pillow, her arms, with their bandages were outside the covers. The monitors blinked numbers in different colors showing heart rate, breathing rate, etc...proof that she WAS actually alive.

Cleaning up his hands was the last part Meg had to deal with. The knuckles were scraped raw and his fingers were swollen on both hands. He was a man who lived and died by his fists. She would have hated to see what the men looked like that those fists had connected with. Stepping back from John she checked him out one last time from head to toe. Pleased with her work she smiled at him. "Ok, you're cleaned up enough to my satisfaction."

Turning back toward the bed she grabbed his arm and stopped him. "I need to tell you something about Elise." She said. "I've patched her up as best I can do without being at a hospital with access to an OR. I've set what broken bones I could and wrapped the ones I couldn't put a cast on. She may still need surgery later. Her internal injuries are bad but not fatal. She was beaten pretty hard in the stomach, her kidneys, and on her back. The whip marks on her back were mainly shallow but stillpainful. Very few of those actually needed stitches. I've stitched up the worst. Whoever did that, knew how to inflict the most pain with the least damage. Her arms were also cut, with a knife I think, but no stitches needed there, butterfly bandages took care of that. I think her cheek bone might be cracked on the side where the darkest bruising is. I was so worried about the mild concussion she had that I didn't position the X-ray correctly to X-ray her cheek. 'Course there's not a lot I could do with that anyway. The cut over her eye did require stitches but shouldn't be too bad of a scar."

While giving John the list of injuries, Meg was looking at Elise. She didn't notice him flinching with every injury she described. He was clenching his fists so hard he caused them to start bleeding again through the bandages. She finally paused and then said. "Barring those injuries, you can touch her where you wish, just be careful NOT to spread any germs." She stepped away from the bed, making room for him to get closer to Elise.

Now that he could go to her, his feet felt like lead. He could not make himself pick up one foot then the other. Absolute terror engulfed him. Looking wildly around, he found Meg's eyes looking at him with understanding and compassion but not pity.

"It's ok John. I know you're scared. It's always scary to see someone you love in pain. But right now she's not feeling the pain. She's in a light coma, while her body tries to handle what happened to it. Marshalling the troops if you will."

Looking back at Elise in the bed, Meg smiled. "She can hear you. She can feel your touch. It's what she's been waiting for. I truly believe that." Turning back to John she frowned. "But, you can NOT let her hear fear for her, in your voice. Do NOT let her see it in your eyes. You must be in control of yourself so you can help her. Do you understand me?"

Nodding his head, he turned his eyes back to Elise. He ached, seeing her again with her dark hair framing her face, the oxygen mask covering the lower portion of that face. As his eyes focused more on her face he could see the bruising, the cuts...he stumbled as his knees got weak. Grabbing his arm, Meg held on to him until she could pull the chair up next to the bed. He sat down heavily, looking at the floor.

He could not bring himself to look at her. In his mind, every cut, every bruise, every broken bone was his fault. His failure. She was his, his to love and protect...and he'd failed. No amount of logic or argument would ever be able to convince him otherwise. Closing his eyes, he slowly shook his head back and forth. Knowing what was going through his mind, Meg leaned down and whispered in his ear.

"John Reese, this is NOT about you. This IS about Elise. You can blame yourself all you want when you are away from her. But right now you are here to help her. Please...please..." pausing for a moment, Meg knew the words to get through to him but she knew they would hurt him. Still, it had to be done "You OWE it to her John".

Clenching his eyes tighter, John seemed to shrink into himself. But only for a moment. The words had the magical effect that Meg had hoped. He stepped outside of his emotional pain and took a deep breath. Opening his eyes, he continued to stare at the floor. Meg knew him well enough to back off and let him handle things himself.

Glancing over at the bed, John saw Elise's hand. It was as battered as his, knuckles raw and bruised, fingers swollen, but still tiny. He knew firsthand how hard she could hit with that hand. Closing his eyes momentarily, he could picture her hand in his, see it stretched out over his chest in sleep. Snapping his eyes open to stop the direction of his thoughts, he saw the butterfly IV taped to the back of her hand. Above her wrist he noticed the heavy gauze wrapped around tightly from her wrist up to her elbow. He remembered seeing the cuts on her arms when he helped cut the bloody sweater off her. Above the gauze on her upper arm he could see bruises in the shape of fingers. It was obvious that she had been grabbed and held tightly or held to keep her from landing any more blows.

The neckline of the hospital gown was pulled down slightly to allow the cardiac monitor leads to be attached. Again the bruising he saw made his breath catch in his throat. And the cuts, those were not defensive wounds, those were inflicted as torture. More bruises indicated that she'd been punched with fists with no way to block them. He'd had it done to him and he'd done it to others. Once again he had to focus and stay away from the mindless screaming going on in the back of his mind.

Finally able to look her in the face he was still not prepared. Seeing her from the foot of the bed had been terrible, seeing her from twelve inches away was excruciating. He saw every detail of every injury. His need to touch her was becoming all consuming. He needed to see her whole face, not just what was above the oxygen mask. Reaching up, he tried to remove it.

Meg was quick to intervene. "Here, let me handle that. She can go awhile without the oxygen assist. Her numbers are looking good."

Removing the mask and turning off the oxygen machine she walked away to give John some privacy.

Gazing at Elise, John felt a sense of calmness come over him. He was here, with her. Neither of them was alone.

Gently taking one hand in his, he began to talk softly. Leaning closer to her he called her name "Elise. Elise, it's me baby. It's John." Watching her closely he looked for any sign to show that she'd heard him. But nothing changed. Her eyes didn't open. She didn't open her mouth, she didn't speak. Looking back at Meg for encouragement, he tried again. "Elise, I'm here for you. Always and forever."

Meg was watching the monitors. Elise's heart rate had increased. Just a little, but enough to take note. "Keep talking to her John."

Resting his forehead on the bed next to her, John grasped her hand with both of his. The bandages on her hands and the bandages on his hands meant there was no skin on skin contact but the pressure from his grip was enough for her to feel...at least he hoped.

Lifting his head he spoke again "I'm sorry...I'm so sorry." His voice broke and he wasn't able to continue. Tears threatened to fall from his eyes, but he heard Meg hiss from behind him. Remembering what she'd said, he blinked rapidly to regain control.

Using his right hand he reached up to smooth Elise's hair. Wrapping a long strand around his finger like he always did, he marveled at the silky feel against his battered skin. Carefully placing it behind her ear, he was almost undone by her reaction to that familiar gesture.

Slightly turning her head she almost nuzzled his hand and then sighed deeply.

"Elise...," he breathed. He was rewarded by a slight smile. But her eyes remained closed. Her long, dark eyelashes contrasted starkly with the paleness of her skin. But there was a slight blush to her cheeks that was not there a moment ago.

Looking back at Meg, he saw that she was watching the monitors. She was smiling and nodding her head. She returned John's look with a smile. "You're doing fine John. You are the perfect medicine for her right now."

Turning back to Elise, everything else in the room fell away. There were no beeping machines, no Meg, no Zoe...no one. Just the two of them. "Elise, I'm here baby. And I'm never going to let anything happen to you again. You are mine...always and forever." He said as he gently leaned over to kiss her. At the touch of his lips her eyes opened. Their blueness was filled with love. Love for him.

"John...mine...always... forever," she whispered. And then she closed her eyes once more.

"Elise!" Said John in a strangled voice. "Elise!"

Placing her hand on his shoulder, Meg tried to calm him down. "You did fine John. You did fine. I was hoping that hearing your voice would get through to her. And it did. It took a lot for her to come back to us but she did it for you. Let her rest for a while now. I really need to put the oxygen mask back on her."

Watching from across the room, Zoe was transfixed by what she had seen. The power of love. Meg had told her how much she was worried about Elise. Her injuries were severe but not quite life threatening. If they had been, Zoe would have pulled rank on Harold and gotten her to a hospital. The major concern was the part of Elise that Meg could not reach. The fact that she was in a coma was not surprising due to the extent of her injuries but it was her lack of response to any stimuli that had Meg concerned.

Elise seemed to have withdrawn into herself. Meg had asked Zoe to try and talk to her while they had waited for Carter and Fusco to find John. But Elise never reacted to Zoe's touch or Zoe's voice. That scared Zoe. She hadn't realized how much Elise had come to mean to her. Her friend, her essence could be gone forever. Seeing Elise looking small and defenseless in the hospital bed with tubes coming out everywhere was almost more than she could handle. Not being an overly emotional person herself she was surprised to feel tears rolling down her cheeks as she stood by the bed holding Elise's hand.

Seeing John with Elise, she was reminded of the first time she had seen them 'together'...after John had been shot. She had felt like an intruder during their moment together. An aura seemed to surround them and shield them from everyone else then, just as it did now.

Elise had not responded to anyone, to her or Meg, but John's touch seemed to rouse her. Zoe found herself holding her breath as she watched them. When Elise opened her eyes to look at him, Zoe felt new tears flowing down her cheeks. It was his love for her that brought her back to them. And it was her love for him that completed the connection.

Walking over to John, she rested her hand on his shoulder and squeezed. Never taking his eyes off of Elise he reached up and squeezed her hand back. Leaning down she spoke quietly in his ear. "Let me get you something to eat and drink and let Meg tend to her. We won't go far I promise. Just across the room."

Shaking his head, he remained seated. Meg turned to them and looked at John. "Remember John, Elise still needs you. You have to take care of yourself if you're going to help me take care of her. Go with Zoe and get something to eat and drink. By the time you're done I will be done too and you can come sit back down right here and continue to talk to her."

Looking up at Meg, John could see the truth in what she said. He knew he was weak, knew he needed to eat to offset all the alcohol he had consumed earlier. Standing up slowly, he leaned down and gently kissed Elise on the top of her head and laid her hand down carefully on the bed. Turning toward Zoe he slowly shuffled forward on bare feet. Zoe led him across the room to the couch that Harold and Grace had been sitting on earlier. Looking around she wondered when they had left. She'd been concentrating so much on John and Elise that she didn't remember seeing them leave. Depositing him on the couch she went to find him something to eat and drink. He looked like he was about out on his feet.

Sitting on the sofa eating a sandwich he could not taste, John kept watch over Elise from across the room. The beeps from the monitors were comforting in the respect that it meant all was well. Washing down the last bite of the sandwich he did feel a little bit closer to human. But not much. Until Elise was completely out of danger and healed, he would not, could not feel normal. Heaving a deep sigh he tried to stand up. Dizziness overcame him and he fell back to the sofa, grateful for the soft landing. His body couldn't take much more punishment. His mental anguish was beyond measure.

Seeing him struggling to stand up, Zoe hurried over. "Hold on John, let me help." She said quietly. Standing over him, looking down at his bowed head, she was worried. He was a strong man, physically and mentally…but his emotional well-being at the moment was another matter altogether. Holding her hand out to him, he looked up. The blue eyes that she'd fallen in love with were still there, but they were haunted now. Too much inward reflection had dimmed their clarity. She could see the shadow in him. He was NOT alright. With sudden insight Zoe realized that John needed Elise as much as Elise needed John. Elise HAD to survive this or she...they, would lose John too.

Pulling him up with both hands she gave him a moment to find his balance. Standing there swaying, he was looking over her head at Elise. The light blue denim shirt gaped open and the numerous bandages showed just how many wounds he had on his body. Zoe shook her head wondering how he could even stand much less walk. Gently taking one of his damaged hands, she led him back to the chair at the side of the bed. Once he was seated she squeezed his shoulder and left him to his vigil.

Meg finished the last check on Elise for the night. All the monitors were keeping watch. Turning to Reese she crouched down in front of him.

"John...I need you to be here. Keep talking to her. She hears and might respond to your voice. You can touch her, but be careful of the bandages and the IVs."

Watching him watch Elise while she was talking to him she wasn't 100% sure he heard her.

"I'm exhausted. I've done everything I can for her. I'm going to sack out on that couch. Call me if something happens." Standing up, she started to walk away...but Reese reached out and grasped her hand.

Looking up at her he quietly said, "Thank you. Thank you for saving her for me."

Giving him a tired smile, she patted his hand and walked to the couch. Sitting down and then stretching out, Meg used the trick she'd learned in medical school to 'switch off' her brain and drift off to sleep inside of five minutes.

Once again taking Elise's hand in his, Reese murmured to her. Nonsensical things, plans that he wanted to make with her, places they would go, things they would do. He rambled for over two hours, untill he got hoarse. He was sometimes rewarded when her hand would tighten on his. A ghost of a smile played across her face a couple of times. Slowly his own mind relaxed as much as his body did and he found himself resting his head on his arm on the bed. Eventually he fell sound asleep still holding her hand.

Trying repeatedly to fight her way up from the heavy darkness that surrounded her, Elise sighed deeply when she finally felt that she'd dragged herself away from the abyss. At first she felt warm and comfortable like she did when she was in John's arms. But that moment faded as the pain came into focus: sharp, burning, aching pain. Everywhere...her face, her jaw, her back, her arms. 'What the hell?' Was her first thought. Then her memory kicked in and she recalled what had happened. She remembered pain, remembered how she got that pain, the anger and helplessness she'd felt. Everything came crashing back into her awareness all at once.

But along with those memories came one of John. Her John. He'd found her. She knew he would. He'd promised her he would always find her. Smiling to herself she relaxed...a little. She wanted to find him, now. She attempted to move but was restrained by the pain that act caused and the tubes and bandages she could now feel all over her body. Opening her eyes, she tried to focus. Where was she? How did she get here? Flailing around in the bed, she felt couldn't move her left hand. That scared her, but then looking down she saw someone. Someone she knew, someone she loved. That salt and pepper hair was unmistakable.

"John? John?" She spoke barely above a whisper. She couldn't seem to take in enough air to speak any louder. "John?"

Coming from a distance John could hear someone calling him. It was Elise. But where was she? Why couldn't he see her? He began to panic again. 'I'm here Elise! I'm here!' He screamed in his mind. Shaking his head he tried to move, to find her. He released her hand and immediately felt the loss of connection.

With her hand free, Elise reached out and stroked John's hair. She couldn't see his face, but she could feel his agitation. "John...look at me." She spoke slowly. "I'm here. I'm here baby."

Finally hearing Elise's voice, John raised his head and opened his eyes. He found himself looking into those blue eyes that had captured his soul.

Elise's reaction was not what he'd expected. "John! John! What happened to you? What happened to your face? Are you ok?" She gasped.

"I'm...I'm ok...I'm ok now." Standing up, he leaned over the bed and kissed Elise gently, afraid he might hurt her. She however was going to have none of that. Reaching up with her bandaged arms she pulled him down to her and kissed him with all she had. She ignored the pain in her arms and back as she pulled him close. After all that she'd been through and thinking that she'd never see him again, she could not get enough of him. Her kisses were harsh and urgent. She needed vindication, proof that she was here with him. Once he got over her initial assault with her mouth, John returned it with equal fervor. Pulling away to catch his breath, John cupped her face with both hands. His love for this tiny woman flowed out of him in waves, almost drowning Elise in its intensity. She was his LIFE. Searching her eyes he saw the same emotion reflected back from her.

A frown appeared on Elise's face. Another memory surfaced. "Grace?" She whispered, with panic in her voice. Last thing she remembered was the elevator door closing, taking Grace to John, to safety.

"She's fine, she's with Harold they told me." Answered John.

"Poor Grace and poor Harold..." Elise sighed with her eyes closed. "I hope he can help her deal with…." She paused, not wanting to dwell on what had happened to either herself or Grace.

"Hold me please John, I need you to hold me. I need to feel your arms around me, I need to hear your heartbeat." She asked haltingly and quietly.

Stepping back, John looked at the hospital bed. It was wide enough for two people, but he was worried about all the monitor leads. Elise looked down and saw all the leads snaking out from her body. She started grabbing them, intent on pulling them off but John would not let her remove them.

"Dr. Tillman put those on and until she takes them off, they are going to stay there." He was worried that she was not out of the woods yet. If something went wrong, they had to have a way to get meds in her quickly.

"But, John….I want you here with me." She pleaded with him.

John just smiled down at her and carefully moved Elise closer to the opposite side and then got onto the bed next to her. Pulling her carefully into his arms, he held her tight, making sure all the leads were not tangled. Elise fought to position herself despite the pain and snuggled up under his chin, throwing her leg over him. They both released deep, contented sighs. No words were necessary. They were together. Slowly drifting off to sleep, they both rested completely for the first time in over a week. Now the real healing could begin.