A/N: The song on the last chapter was Pac-Man Fever by Buckner and Garcia. Sorry I forgot to tell you guys who sang that song. Ok so thanks to all of my reviewers out there! Thank you to: GAjujubee, JNC12, the captains wife, gemma loves edward, alexisR.W, EvilTwinSie, alice cullen 1297, edwardandjakeloverr ! This chapter is dedicated to all of you guys for taking the time to tell me what you guys thought so far of the story! Oh and by the way you should go and read my bestest buddy EvilTwinSie's story its super amazing! Ok enough of my rambling on to the disclaimer and the rest of the story!
Disclaimer:
Jasper: Hey MissRisa!
Me: Hey… Oh my gosh! JASPER!!! *run up and give him a hug*
Jasper: You seem happy.
Me: DUH! I mean your Jasper who wouldn't be happy you're here?
Alice: MISSRISA!
Me: uh oh…
Alice: What did I tell you about staying away from my husband!?
Me: …
Alice: Exactly, stay away from Jasper you don't own him.
Me: … I know… Dang SM for not selling me the ownership of her amazing books… (But we all love SM anyways!)
Chapter 10: Choices
*Previously*
"No! I won't let him hurt me or her anymore. She comes first." I thought. I scooped Nessie up and turned and ran away. I ran as far and as fast as I could before my dry sobbing started.
It hurt to see Edward, knowing he doesn't want me. I could tell by the look on his face that he was upset about me getting pregnant. One side of me screamed to run and move away. To never look back and stop the hurt. I couldn't do that though. Renesmee deserved to have a chance to get to know her father; it would be up to her. She has waited too long to get the chance to meet her family. I would let her have this chance.
It would be Renesmee's choice now on whether we leave…or stay.
Bella's POV:
I ran and ran and ran. I knew at some point I had started 'crying'. I came to a stop when it proved to be too hard to continue running when I was like this. I sank down to the floor and I curled up before I let the racking sobs break free.
Nessie pulled my head onto her lap and gently stroked my hair. She was trying to comfort and soothe me as best as possible. The roles of mother and daughter seemed to be reversed here, because I clung to my daughter as tight as I could without hurting her.
After a little while, my sobs had quieted and I had stopped holding Nessie so tight. I slowly sat up. I looked at my daughter and my heart broke. How could I be so selfish as to let her see how much it hurt to see Edward?
"I'm so sorry Renesmee," I said honestly.
"For what Mom?"
"For everything. You shouldn't have had to grow p the way you did. You should have been able to grow up knowing your fathers family. I was selfish in taking you away before they knew about you."
"Mom, look at me," I looked up at my daughter," Do I look like I have had a hard life? Do I complain about not knowing the Cullens earlier? Mom I have loved living with you and not once in my life have I ever regretted it. Mom you are amazing and I love you." My daughter put her arms around me and wrapped me up in a hug.
"How did I ever get such an amazing and wonderful daughter?"
"The same way I got such an amazing mother."
I laughed at my daughter's response. She had a sense of humor close to that of her uncle Emmett's. She loved to try and lighten the mood when everyone was serious. Much to my regret she is also a little prankster when she wants to be. Curse anyone who tries and go against her in anything. She definitely gets her competitive when she really wants something.
Once again I had run back to my peaceful escape. The same place where I had originally ran to after seeing the Cullen's again. I didn't plan on showing anyone my little retreat, but I didn't mind sharing it with my daughter.
It really was peaceful here. The lake was calm and inviting. For a moment I thought of suggesting a swim with my daughter. No doubt leading to some form of water fight once we got in.
I sobered up quickly when I remembered why we had gotten here in the first place. This place really made me forget about my problems.
"Renesmee . . . we need to talk," I said looking at my daughter with a blank expression.
Renesmee looked at me and sighed. I guess she knew what I was going to ask now. I think she even already has an answer.
"Mom I don't want you to hate me." Renesmee said looking up at me sadly.
"Sweetie, I could never hate you. I just want to know whether or not you think we should stay. I need to know if you want to stay and have a relationship with your father. I'm going to leave the choice up to you. It's your life too and I think you have just as much say in the matter as I do." I said looking at her.
"I see how it hurts you to be around him though Mom,-"
"What do you want to do?" I interjected
" -- how can you expect me to make such an important decision that effects all of us?!" Nessie yelled standing up.
"I raised you right; I have confidence in anything and everything you do." I responded calmly.
"I can't stand choosing something that will in turn hurt you though." Nessie said slowly.
Then don't part of me said. I knew I couldn't ask my daughter that though. If she wanted this then she will get this.
"Don't think about me, I'm strong I can handle it. What matters more is what you want."
"Mom, I think I want…"
Edward's POV:
*Previously*
Bella slowly turned to face us. Japer, Emmett, and I were very confused by everything.
"Oh shit…"Bella thought.
Wait, her shield is down? Oh her powers are controlled by her emotions, she must have let her shield fall during the fight because how upset she was.
"My little sister just kicked Tanya's ass!"Emmett thought, proud about how Bella handled herself.
"How did Bella have a kid is what I want to know…" Jasper thoughts trailed off.
Hurt and pain was all over my face. Did my love meet another man? Did she have a child with him? Before she was changed I mean. How am I supposed to win her back now?
I looked at Bella, her face crumpled in pain. "Of course he wouldn't want me after this. I am not surprised, I always knew it would happen, but I never suspected it to hurt so much."Bella said in her head. How could she think that? Of course I want her. I took a step towards her.
"No! I won't let him hurt me or her anymore. She comes first."Bella thought panicking. Bella turned around and scooped Renesmee up into her arms.
For the second time I had hurt my angel and made her flee. Bella ran fast, but not fast enough, before her dry sobbing reached our ears.
*** Seconds after the above happened***
How could I do that to her? I made her cry, and run from me again. Even if she had another man's child, I would still love her. I have never stopped loving her. What have I done?
"Damn it Edward!" Rosalie screamed at me in her head.
"Poor Bella, she looked so upset…" Esme thought sadly.
"Damn! Did you see Tanya run! HA, she was scared of BELLA! Of all the people she chooses to be afraid of she is afraid of sweet little Bella."
I shook my head at Emmett's thoughts. Only he could think of that after seeing Bella run off clearly upset about what happened.
"Edward, why is Emmett so amused at a time like this?" Jasper asked me in his head.
I rolled my eyes, there was no way I was answering that question.
"Son, you need to talk to her before making any assumptions." Carlisle thought.
WAIT! They know what is wrong with Bella?! Hmm who will be the easiest to get to tell me? Alice. Surely my sister will tell me what is going on here.
I turned to look at my pixie little sister. She tensed when she realized I was staring at her. She shifted nervously form foot to foot.
"I just can't get you out of my head,
La la la la la la la la,
La la la la la la la la,
I just can't get you out of my head,
La la la la la la la la,
La la la la la la la la,
I just can't get you out of my head,
La la la la la la la la,
La la la la la la la la,
I just can't get you out of my head,
La la la la la la la la,
La la la la la la la la," Alice sang in attempt to keep me out of her head.
I laughed it was an interesting choice of song, and completely ironic. Here is Alice, singing a song in her head about how she can't get me out of her head, and she is completely blocking her thoughts in the process.
What an evil little pixie.
"I must say Alice, you are doing an amazing job of blocking your thoughts." I said to her.
Alice just laughed, at me. She must have known that this was driving me insane. Not knowing was killing me.
Alice got the far away gaze that we all know so well. She was having a vision. I peeked into her mind and saw nothing. Absolutely nothing.
"YAY!" Alice said jumping up and down excitedly.
"What was your vision of dear?" Esme asked.
"Nothing," She replied with a smile.
"No, really what was your vision of?" Emmett asked.
"I told you, nothing. I didn't see anything in my vision." Alice said exasperated.
"She's telling the truth her vision was of just blackness." I said on behalf of Alice.
Alice shared a knowing look with Rosalie and Esme. Both smiled back.
So they know too…
Bella's POV:
It has been decided. We are staying. Renesmee thinks it may be a good idea to try and have a relationship with them.
I see her point though. Most of the Cullens already know and it would really hurt them if I took Renesmee away from them now.
So, I guess I would have to stay and ignore my instincts that are telling me to run. If this is what it would take to make my daughter happy then so be it.
Until she decides to leave then we will be staying right here where we are.
(A/N: Sorry everyone! Let's just say I am grounded and computer is being taken away. I will try to update when I can and will be probably having my friend login to my account and update for me. Thanks for my reviews everyone! My goal is to get over 60 of them by the next update. So everyone go review please! The song featured in this chapter was Can't Get You Out Of My Head by Kylie Minogue. Love you guys!
~MissRisa
p.s. I will keep updating as fast as I can but it's a little hard to do when your mom is convinced every time I'm on the computer I am doing school work so most likely updates will be on the weekends.