Bella Swan: The Unwanted Bride

A story by tumblin' di

Chapter 10: Confessions

Saturday was pretty much a repeat of Sunday-except we ate meat. Edward stayed exiled in his room except for meals, which he ate in silence. I cooked and cleaned.

Around 3:00 there was a knock at the front door. Of course I peeked before I would open it, but I knew I would have to answer the door or Edward would question what was going on. We needed to talk about how we would respond to (nosy) neighbor questions.

Sucking in a breath, I opened the door and a woman with a warm smile was standing there with a cake in her hands.

"I'm Esme Cullen, I just wanted to welcome you to the neighborhood and bring you a little something to nibble on while you're here."

I was so relieved.

"Oh, please, come in. It's so nice to meet you. I hope you have time for a cup of tea?"

"I really don't want to impose…"

"Nonsense, Mrs. Cullen. Any wife of Dr. Cullen is welcome in my home."

She walked into the foyer and we heard a door open upstairs.

"Bella, who's here?" Called Edward from the upstairs hall.

"It's Esme Cullen. Dr. Cullen's wife."

Esme's eyes were going from me to the top of the stairs and she looked panicked. Slowly, her arms began to give and the cake she was holding began to slide off. Quickly, I managed to get the plate from her hands before any damage was done. She put her hand over her mouth and began backing towards the door.

"Esme, are you alright?"

"Who…who…" She was pointing up the stairs.

"It's only Edw…OH! Oh Esme. You didn't know?"

She couldn't speak. Oh my gosh, she didn't know that Edward had survived.

Edward walked down the staircase and began to smile as he saw Esme but he immediately switched to concern when he saw how upset she was. Edward walked to her side and guided her into the parlor. I hurried to the kitchen so I could put the cake away because this was a visit I wasn't going to miss. Every time I even mentioned the hospital Edward would walk out of the room.

Esme was sitting on the couch when I walked into the parlor, so I sat next to her and put her hand in mine. She looked like she had seen a ghost. Well I guess she should.

"Esme, I'm sorry. I didn't mean to startle you. I suppose you husband had given you rather bad news about me, right?"

"Indeed he did."

"The only thing I can remember was waking up on a gurney in the morgue. The attending doctor probably woke up a few other dead people with as loud as he screamed."

Esme and I just looked at each other at that last statement.

"Eh, well, he explained to me that sometimes, a person's breathing and heartbeat are so shallow, that they're undetectable. He assumed that either that was the case, or that whomever verified my, uh, death, didn't do a very good job. It's really not that uncommon of an occurrence. I wasn't even the first corpse he had seen come back to life. He also said that bringing me down to the morgue probably saved my life. It's so cool down there that it must have broken my fever."

Esme was crying at this point. She got up from the couch and Edward rose as well. She gave him a strong hug and put her hands on his face, squeezing his cheeks. He squirmed a little but smiled at her just the same.

She sat back down and was shaking her head, I suppose she was trying to clear her thoughts. This was an amazing thing, after all.

Esme told Edward how sorry she was about his parents. I could tell that Edward thought the world of Esme. When she finally turned to me she froze for a moment.

"Oh."

"Oh, indeed" replied Edward.

Esme looked like a fly caught in a web. She suddenly stood rambling about not wanting to intrude, we must be so busy…

Edward and I walked her to the door. I thanked her for the cake and invited her to visit any time. She was shaking so badly that I wondered how she managed to walk but before Edward could offer to walk her home she was gone.

We both walked back into the parlor. Before Edward had the chance to do his disappearing act up the stairs I said:

"For what it's worth Edward, I'm very glad that you survived. Even if it means having to live this charade, I'm very glad."

He just turned and walked up the stairs.

I spent the rest of the day alone which gave me plenty of time to think about what my life had become and what my future held. It was pretty bleak. I still had no idea what I was going to say to my father. Lying was not something I wanted to do, but if I told my father the truth, he would never allow me back home. Even worse than not having a home to go back home to was knowing the pain it would cause my father to discover that his only daughter was soon to be a divorcee.

There was one last truth that I may also have to face, but I refused to think about it. It was just too terrifying. Instead of facing it, I cut a big slice of Esme's cake and ate it. I didn't bring any upstairs for Edward.

Why, oh, why was Edward knocking on my bedroom door at six in the morning?

"Bella, you're going to make us late for Mass."

"I'm up, I'm up."

I don't want to get up. But I did. Six o'clock on a Sunday morning? Are they crazy?

I hurried and threw my Sunday dress on. I rushed so much in the bathroom that I spilled tooth powder all over the front of myself—well at least I smelled minty. It must be raining, because my hair was all over the place. I had bags under my eyes from lack of sleep. The best part was that I was going to have to listen to a sermon that would probably tell me that I was going to be damned. What a great start to the day.

Edward was waiting in the kitchen for me, eating a piece of cake. He was dressed in a smart, dark blue, pin striped suit with a white shirt and stiff collar. His hair went every which way, but I was beginning to realize that it wasn't his being incapacitated which caused it—that was how his hair was all the time. It made me angry that I wanted to rub my face in it so badly.

We realized at the same time that he was staring at me as well.

He casually stuffed one last bite of cake in his mouth.

"Is this dress ok? I have one other if I'm not dressed right."

"No, no, you look…appropriate. Ready?"

I nodded.

Appropriate? I guess he's trying to be kind because it's Sunday. Another rule maybe?

I pulled my coat out of the hall closet and we met at the door. He was gentlemanly enough to allow me to go first. The sun was just coming up and I saw that there were quite a few people on the sidewalks and street heading to church. There were some very large families and the children seemed to be well behaved. Some people were dressed to the nines, and there were just as many who wore clothes that were obviously dated. My dress fell somewhere in between.

We were headed up the steps to the church when I someone behind us said "Edward, Edward, wait up."

We stopped and looked behind us. Blondie and apparently her mother and father were waving us over. Edward's face tightened up, but he placed his hand against my back and led me down to our neighbors.

"Oh, Edward, I can't tell you how devastated we all are over the loss of your parents. I'm sure you've been very busy (she very obviously looked at my hand for a ring and my belly for a bulge) which is why there haven't been any funeral details in the newspaper. Edward, you must let your wife know that she has certain social responsibilities now that she's taken your mother's place in your home."

Edward's fists clenched up at his side. I put my hand on his forearm.

"I'm sorry that we haven't properly been introduced. I'm Bella Sw—Masen, and you are?"

"My heaven's, I'm Mrs. Hale, of course, and this is my husband and my daughter Rosalie. So very nice to meet you Bella. I'm sure you'll be having an open house soon and then we'll be able to get to know one another much better."

Edward gritted his teeth and said:

"Mrs. Masen and I should be finding a seat now. Good day Mrs. Hale, Mr. Hale, Rosalie."

"Oh and Mrs. Masen, it's so refreshing that you decided to forgo wearing black and choosing light colors instead. You must be from somewhere with a very modern morality."

Edward and I were probably both a matching shade of red. He looked down and saw my eyes were brimming with tears. He put his hand on my back again and led me to the side of the building so no one would see me cry.

"We don't have to go in Bella. Father Seth would understand if you can't do this."

"Are you embarrassed of me?"

"No, I'm embarrassed that I know people like that."

"Then I want to go in. I won't allow ignorant people like her to choose where I can and cannot go."

A flicker of a smile came to his face and we walked into church together.

Edward did that thing with the water again, and before he sat in the pew he briefly knelt down on one knee. I didn't know if I should curtsey or something. I'll need to learn the rules.

To say that the church was beautiful was an understatement. For one thing, it was huge. There were giant stained glass windows on either side down the entire length of the church. They were breathtaking. The altar was white marble, and at the end of it was a series of sculptures of Christ and Mary in various stages of their history. Everywhere you looked there were gold statues and candles and with the sun coming through the stained glass window the entire interior sparkled.

An elderly woman sitting behind me tapped me on my shoulder. I turned around and she handed me a square of lace and a hair pin. I had no idea why she gave it to me and she pointed to her hair. I noticed the all the women at church were wearing hats or veils, so I put it on to make her happy. I guess she thought I'd feel out of place without a hat.

Everyone became quiet as Father Seth went up to the pulpit. He began speaking—in Latin. For a real long time. Edward and everyone else seemed to be answering him in unison—in Latin. I was lost. Also, I was always the last person who would go from standing, to sitting, to kneeling…

Edward didn't even look at me. He seemed entranced. There were several people who weren't so entranced though, and they were staring at me and whispering amongst themselves. Finally Father Seth began speaking in English so I had something to occupy my mind.

He gave a sermon on how good deeds are sometimes not acknowledged and that we need to understand that there is only one opinion that matters, and He knows what's in our hearts. I love Father Seth.

Edward went to the front of the church to get communion while I sat and waited. I was the only person in the church who did not go to communion. I may as well have had horns protruding from the top of my head and done a little dance on those kneely benches to deserve all the stares I was getting. My face had to have been red enough to look like the devil himself.

Father Seth reminded us to pray for our soldier's safe return, and also remember those who were affected by the flu. Amen.

We had to wait in line to leave the church. Father Seth stood at the door, greeting all of the parishioners. When it was our turn, instead of shaking my hand he wrapped me in a gentle hug.

"I'm so glad you came Mrs. Masen. It was probably a bit overwhelming the first time and I do hope that you come back again next Sunday—or any time that you want to visit with me."

"Thank you Father Seth. I'll be back again on Sunday."

"Oh, actually Mr. and Mrs. Masen, I'll be going to visit the people who are unable to get to church today, would you mind if I stopped by while I am making my rounds. I have something I'd like to talk to you about?"

Edward replied, "Of course, you know you're always welcome."

The crowd behind us was getting a little restless to get out. One girl in particular was looking at me like she wanted to pull my hair out. I thought being nice was a Sunday rule? I realized then that Alice was standing behind her so I waved. I was surprised that Alice was wearing that raggedy old dress instead of her new one. Miss Meany was now glaring at Alice. I thought I would wait for another day to chit chat with Alice as I couldn't really understand what was going on between her and Miss Meany.

As Edward and I were walking home I asked him if he would be able to teach me some of the 'rules'. He laughed a little but said that he would do that before next Sunday. I also asked if he knew who Alice was with and he told me it was the Mallorys. He said that he really didn't know the situation, but that Alice was a recent addition to the family.

When we got home I fixed us a quick breakfast and went to work preparing for a big Sunday dinner, hoping that Father Seth would join us. I made chicken fricassee and mashed potatoes along with baking powder biscuits. We still had most of Esme's cake left so we could have that for dessert. Since it was Sunday, I also put the percolator on the stove to make some coffee. It would probably take an hour to brew but we would have enough for the whole day.

Surprisingly, Edward stayed in the kitchen with me most of the day and read the Sunday paper and watched me cook. Must be that Sunday nice thing again. He gave me tips on the customs at church. He explained that most of what was said in Latin was repeated every week and translated some of the main words that were used. When I asked him if I was supposed to curtsy before sitting down he had a good laugh. He showed me how to 'genuflect'.

When I was done preparing dinner and we ran out of safe subjects to talk about I fixed us both a cup of coffee and sat down at the kitchen table with him.

I wanted to get to know Edward better, but I knew that he was reluctant to tell me about himself because he didn't trust me. So I started with some easy questioning.

I asked if he was excited about getting back to school and he admitted that he was. He blushed a little and nodded when I asked if he got good grades. He shyly admitted that he was hoping to be valedictorian. He said his father would have expected no less. He told me that his school was called St. Mary's and that there would be 75 people in his graduating class. His eyes popped when I told him that I was in a class with 5 other seniors. He asked about my grades and I also shyly admitted that I was a good student. When he asked about my favorite teacher I laughed and told him that I had the same teacher since I began going to school.

After a pause, I took a deep breath and asked the big question:

"Edward, normally, I wouldn't be so intrusive, but given the situation, I was wondering if you have or…had…a…sweetheart?

He pinched his nose and opened his mouth to answer and someone knocked at the door.

"I'll get that."

Darn!

I could hear Father Seth's voice coming from the foyer. Edward led Father Seth to the parlor so I put together a tray of coffee and joined them there. We made some small talk and when asked if he would be joining us for dinner, Father Seth informed me that there was a rule that no priest was allowed to refuse chicken fricassee.

"Edward, Bella, I have some good news for the both of you."

We looked at him expectantly.

"Edward, I discovered that your parents had already purchased a lot at St. Joseph's Cemetery. I've arranged to have them removed from where they are now and have them buried at St. Joe's on Saturday morning. This should give you some time to make an announcement in the paper so everyone will be able to pay their respects."

Edward was stunned.

"I'm stunned. I don't even know what to say or how to thank you. This is beyond—

"I admit I did have to wrestle with a few demons—and when I say demons I mean the city bureaucrats—but if it wasn't for Bella bringing this to my attention it would have been too late to take care of it."

Edward looked at me through damp lashes.

"Bella, I don't know what to say, but thank you. So much. You, too Father, thank you both so much."

Father Seth wanted to give Edward a moment so he had me show him where he could freshen up before dinner.

We all ate happily at the dining room table. Edward had a shine in his eyes that I hadn't seen before. I don't know if he was just happy to hear about his parent's situation or that he was in love with my chicken. I swear if he was alone he would have licked his plate.

Before he left, Father gave Edward details about the service on Saturday and he warned me to expect a lot of visitors that day. When I asked him if it was inappropriate to wear clothes other than black during the week, he assured me that people Edward and my age were not required to do so. Not only that, but the church had changed their views on that saying that life was meant to be colorful, not bleak.

Edward was still not 100 percent, so he went to bed right after Father left. I cleaned up and took a long hot soak in the bathtub. Considering how my morning began it actually turned out to be the best day I had in quite a while. Oh, if only that feeling would have continued.

The next day Mr. Jenks stopped by.

Edward ushered him into the library and closed the door in my face. I pressed my ear to the door but really didn't need to since Edward was yelling loud enough to be heard across the street. When I heard the chairs scrape against the floor I ran to the kitchen so they wouldn't know that I had been listening.

When Edward came into the kitchen I casually asked what happened.

"Bella, I could see your feet under the crack of the library door and I know you listened to every word that was said."

I turned red and wanted to the floor to open up and swallow me.

He laughed and shook his head and mumbled "women" as he walked out of the room.

When he returned he was holding a stack of mail in his hands. His eyebrow lifted and he handed me two envelopes. They were one was addressed to Mr. and Mrs. Edward Masen and the other to Mrs. Edward Masen.

Edward folded his arms across his chest and waited for me to open them. The first one contained our marriage certificate. The second contained his death certificate. He held his hand out to me. I couldn't move. He made the gimmee motion so I finally handed them over.

He let out a dark chuckle and said "at least it's the same date so there's less of a chance of forgetting our anniversary." He walked out of the room and I was left standing there like an idiot.

Later that day Dr. Cullen came over to speak with Edward. There was no yelling this time but Dr. Cullen politely refused the tea I offered and was quickly ushered out the door by Edward after their short 'chat' in the library.

"Bella, I have to downtown tomorrow and get the status of my 'death' changed. Will you please stay out of trouble while I'm gone?"

"Yes, but Edward, I'll have you know that I never had any trouble before until I met you." He just rolled his eyes.

"Oh, and I'm going to stop by the school and find out the status of that. I take it that you would like to continue your education while you're here?"

I nodded enthusiastically. Most men would consider a wife's education a waste of time. As long as you know how to cook and clean is all that mattered.

"One other thing. We have a cleaning woman that comes in every Tuesday. She'll be here around eight."

And true to his word Mrs. Wolinski was here bright and early. She cleaned the kitchen first so she would be out of my way. She took the rugs outside and beat them, scrubbed the floors and dusted. I really didn't want another person to clean my house, but it was a really huge house and difficult to keep up with. Mrs. Wolinski let me know that I should gather the dirty laundry and she would drop them off at the cleaners when she left. Wow, no bloody knuckles from the washboard.

A knock at the back door startled me. Alice was bouncing on her toes waiting for me to answer it.

"I hope you don't mind me barging in like this but I missed you so much."

"Alice, you are always welcome to visit. Come sit down and I'll fix you some tea."

"It was nice seeing you at church, I'm sorry that we didn't have time to talk."

"Bella, when you see me with Lauren or Mrs. Mallory, its best that we don't really talk...or anything."

This was an odd request.

"I don't want to pry, but is there a reason for that."

She looked sad.

"You don't have to tell me—

"No, you are my best friend. I just don't want to upset you."

"I'm a really good person to talk to, if you want…"

"Well, I was found at the hospital and I couldn't remember anything. The doctors seem to think that I may have had a very high fever and it affected my brain. I had a piece of paper in my pocket with Alice Brandon written on it, so we're assuming that this is my name. Several people tried to find out who my family is, but we haven't any luck. Mrs. Mallory found out about me and brought me to her house and lets me live there with her family. That's about it, really."

"I couldn't help but notice that you said her family. Do they treat you like family Alice?"

"They feed me and I have a place to sleep. If it wasn't for them I would be out on the streets starving, so I'm grateful for them."

I nodded but didn't press the subject. I had a strong feeling that Alice more than earned her keep. She was overly thin, her clothes were barely more than rags, her fingers were red and raw and she had dark circles under her eyes.

"If you can stay for lunch, I'll share my story with you. You said you were my best friend, so it's only right that I tell you about myself as well". I would have told her anything to make sure she had a good meal.

So I told her everything. Except about the butterflies I felt in my stomach every time I looked at Edward. She promised to keep my story to herself.

There was another knock at the back door and I saw Esme through the window. I invited her in and introduced Alice to her. It was kind of funny, Alice's eyes were wide and she seemed to be in awe of Esme. Alice was on her best behavior and never took her eyes off of her.

Alice looked at the clock and jumped up, running to the door. We hurried our farewells and Alice hugged Esme and me goodbye.

After Alice left, Esme apologized for her 'rude' behavior the other day, which I completely understood so there was no need to apologize. She let me know that she lived just a few houses away, which was nice to know. We made small talk about the neighbors and then she asked about Alice. I figured Alice could as many allies as possible, so I told Esme what Alice told me, and I also gave some of my opinions. Esme admitted that she certainly would not want any daughter of hers to be in a house with Mrs. Mallory and her daughter Lauren.

We both had dinners to make for our husbands and it was getting late. We promised to have tea with each other at least a couple of days a week.

Edward came home and into the kitchen as I was getting dinner started.

"I hope everything went well?"

"No, it didn't."

I poured him a cup of tea and set it down in front of him.

"What happened?"

"First, I have to get some paperwork notarized proving that I'm not dead. Then those will have to go through the proper channels before I'm declared alive. In the meantime, my father's money is still going through probate with you being named as the sole heir."

"Edward, that's one thing you don't have to worry about. I wouldn't touch a penny of your money."

"Humph. Then there's the matter of school. It will be reopening next week, however, married men and women are not allowed to attend. I have been officially dismissed from St. Mary's."

"Oh, Edward! I'm so sorry. You were going to be valedictorian and I've ruined that for you."

"The good news is that I'll be able to finish my studies from home and receive a diploma."

I couldn't take it. I began to sob. I've totally ruined Edward's life. I am truly the horrible person that he thinks I am.

He came behind my chair and hesitated at first, but began patting my hair.

"Don't worry. They said that you could study from home, too. I'll get a tutor for you and you'll get a diploma, too."

I just nodded, unable to say that my education wasn't what made me cry. It was what I had taken from him that was killing me. Besides, in six months I would be scrubbing people's floors just like Mrs. Wolinski and a diploma wouldn't matter.

Edward's hand felt so good in my hair that I almost didn't want to stop crying so he would continue caressing me. I was going to need all the comforting I could get before I dropped the bombshell. I figured this day was already bad so I would face the demon thought that had been plaguing me since the day Edward died.

"Edward, as long as it's been such an awful day, we might as well put all of our cards on the table and get things over with. I think you should sit down."

I took a deep breath and folded my hands together. I couldn't bring myself to look at him so I stared at my hands.

"Edward, there is a chance that I may be…with child."

A/N: Oh yes I did.