The story thus far: After being advised not to make close friends at school, Remus and his dorm mates get off to a rocky start. Eventually, Remus makes a friend in Lily, and they present a united front when it comes to Sirius and James. It is fifth year, and Remus has decided that it is due time for some payback.

Warnings: Slash, eventual RLSB

Disclaimers: Don't own it.

Notes: Thanks to the betas! And I hope all of you have been less swamped with life than I have.

ooooooooooooooo

The Worst Year Yet

By Rekahneko

Chapter 10 – Fifth Year – Falling for Remus

ooooooooooooooo

"Nice hair, Remus."

"You know you like it," he countered with a smile, running his hand through the strands, making the wildly colored sparkles in it glint.

"Glad you're supporting diversity, what with the rainbow and all." Lily chuckled. "Want me to help find the counterspell?"

"Nah, it'll wear off in a bit."

"Another prank, eh?"

"Yeah. This one is almost my own fault though. I reminded Black about something he pulled back in second year and the annoying git just had to repeat it."

"Why are you smiling if you think he is so annoying? Don't tell me you are reminiscing fondly over past pranks or something…"

Remus laughed. "Just in a good mood, I suppose."

"You have certainly gotten more laid back about Black and Potter's antics. Why is that, I wonder? Could it have anything to do with the fact that you fancy one of them?" Pretending to think carefully about the idea, Lily pursed her lips and drew her brows together.

"Hush. I'm more laid back about everything compared to my first year, not just the pranks."

"You were so cute! All shy and formal…"

Remus cleared his throat, embarrassed. "Anyhow, you know they aren't as bad as they used to be."

"I'm not sure. They certainly try just as many stunts as they used to."

"But these days, they aren't nearly as…" Remus tried to think of the right word to use. "As mean about it or something. It is as if all the acid has gone out of the prank, at least on their part. Of course, it's still just as embarrassing as always, having people laugh at me."

"Which is why we are going to pull this prank on them, right?"

"Right!"

"And you aren't going to back out at the last minute because you're a little sweet on Black, right?"

"How could you ever doubt my intentions," he asked, mock offended.

"Actually I've been worried you were starting to get Stockholm Syndrome."

Remus looked at her blankly.

"You know, where a prisoner becomes sympathetic to his captors."

"And that would fit me because…"

"Because, while you might not be a prisoner, you do live with them. I worry that pretty soon, you'll start enjoying the pranks instead of being annoyed by them. But don't worry, it's not just you. Black and Potter would make anyone go mental."

"Planning pranks is actually kind of fun, but having them happen to you, well, I'm still not delighted by that."

"Good on both counts because we need to plan some more details about our idea. You brought your notes, right?"

Remus nodded and pulled out his list of potential weaknesses for their plan to try and trick James and Sirius. "All right. So we're pranking Black and Potter by charming their clothes to read insults and giving them a potion so they can't see the writing. First issue - what are we going to do about Peter?"

"What do you mean," Lily asked.

"We agreed not to include him in the prank itself but he will spill the beans no matter what. He's a faithful minion of the two idiots after all. Speaking of which, we should get ourselves one of those, don't you think?"

"A minion would be nice, but imagine having to put up with someone like Peter following you around all day. Not my idea of fun, even in return for a mindless drone who would do our every bidding."

"Well I think we need to make sure he can't read the messages on their clothes either. I guess we need to give him the potion as well. We might also consider including the teachers if we can make a big enough batch." At the approving nod, Remus made a note.

"Next issue – timing. We need to get both of their class schedules and where they go between classes when they have a break. I will leave that to you, Lily."

"No problem."

"We'll need to do the prank on laundry day so that it will be easy to make all their extra clothes disappear. It's just too complex of a spell to repeat on every outfit. The house elves take the laundry right after breakfast and they don't return it until the end of that evening. I'll need to put all their clothes in the laundry so that the only things left will be pieces with the spells."

"Don't forget to include your own clothes in that. And Longbottom and Pettigrew as well. You know they'll try to borrow robes once they figure it out, especially if the two of them want meals. The professors are being really strict about the dress code for meals this year. Robes are required."

"Right, let me make another note." Remus carefully added to his growing set of comments for the prank. He scanned the parchment and grimaced. "The planning is getting really complicated. How do Black and Potter do this so often?"

Lily shrugged. "Speaking of their pranks, what are we going to do about the ball? It didn't even occur to me until James asked me."

"What did you say to him?"

"No, of course. But what if someone else asks me? Someone I normally would say yes to?"

"Someone you might say yes to? Other than Potter?" Remus raised an eyebrow.

"Yeah, well. Maybe someone like that one hunky seventh year you made fun of me for staring at yesterday."

"The Ravenclaw keeper? You think he would ask you to the dance?"

"I didn't say I thought he would ask, I was just using him as an example. Of course he wouldn't ask me." Despite the accepting nature of her words, Lily looked a bit put out that she wasn't expecting an invitation from the older heartthrob.

"If it makes you feel any better, I think he shops on my aisle rather than yours."

"All the good ones, I tell ya," Lily laughed. "So what if someone acceptable does ask me?"

Remus looked uncertain. "I suppose you could still say yes, knowing that the dance most likely won't actually happen…"

"I'm certainly not buying a new dress for a formal ball that will be ruined by those idiots. But if I don't end up getting an invitation, don't you think it will look strange? I mean, both of us decide not to go, and then the event gets pranked…"

Shrugging, Remus suggested, "Maybe we could say we are going together or something."

Lily wrinkled her nose. "I guess so."

"You sound so thrilled." Remus grinned.

"Don't mind me. I was just overwhelmed by the romantic nature of your proposal. It's all flowers and poetry with you, isn't it, Remus?"

"Lily, you know me so very well. So are we going together then, or not?"

"Sure. I would love to go with you to the formal dance that won't actually happen." She made a courtly bow from her chair. "I can hardly wait!"

"Oh, ha, ha."

"Before I forget! I had a good thought about spreading the word that day. I found out that my study partner for astronomy just got dumped by Black, and she is not very happy about it. Can't think why she was so upset about the whole thing, but there you are. It turns out that she is also the biggest gossip in Hufflepuff. I'll arrange a review session with her that morning and fill her in on what I 'overheard' about the prank. I am sure she would delight in spreading the word."

oooooooooooooooo

"I've got another brilliant idea, James," whispered Sirius to his best friend. "This time, Lupin will be sure to fall for me."

"Yeah?" James didn't seem as certain as Sirius.

"It'll be perfect! If you hide, hit him with a tripping jinx, and then I'm there to catch him, he'll be certain to see how great I am. I'll be just like a knight in shining armor."

"So, you're going to get him to fall for you by making him fall onto you?"

"Aren't I clever?"

"You're something, all right."

Sirius smiled to himself as he imagined the scene. Remus, looking somehow both innocent and desirable, is walking along the hallway reading a book. Suddenly, danger strikes! He trips, finding himself falling through the air in near mortal peril. Sirius races to the rescue, gallantly catching the gracefully fainting boy. "Oh, Sirius. You are my hero," Remus says as he flutters his lashes in a very romance novel sort of a way. "I've been secretly pining for you for years. Now I can finally admit my eternal adoration of you, your ruggedly handsome, sexy body, and your brilliant pranks." Then, leaning towards each other, two sets of lips will come closer and closer until…

"Sirius."

"What?" questioned Sirius, annoyed at the interruption.

"I asked when and where you are planning this prank."

"It isn't a prank, it is a vehicle for romance. And I was thinking in the Charms corridor right before lunch, Tuesday. He always walks that way after class, even though it takes longer. I think he likes the view of the lake."

James coughed, almost sounding like he was saying, "stalker."

As Sirius was beating his friend with a pillow, neither of them saw the figure across the common room shaking his head in exasperation and chuckling to himself. Though he should have been out of earshot, Remus had a few talents his roommates didn't know about.

"Remus, why are you so amused? I've never known Herbology to be funny," Lily looked suspiciously at her study partner.

He nodded across the room to the erupting pile of students and pillows. "I'll tell you later."

"It's certainly more interesting to study here in the common room, but it's so easy to get distracted. And speaking of me getting distracted, what quill are you using? That doesn't look like one of yours."

"Actually, it is Black's. A while back, I lent him one, and he returned a different one. This quill kind of leaks, actually." He sighed at the ink spots on his fingers.

"Why don't you ask for yours back?"

Remus mumbled something under his breath.

"What was that?"

"I said I was too embarrassed. He obviously didn't realize the one he returned wasn't the one I lent him."

"But you have his," Lily pointed out.

"He seems happy enough with mine," Remus responded. He then added, "of course, that's probably because it doesn't leak."

oooooooooooooooo

Tuesday arrived and lunchtime approached. James hid himself in an alcove behind a suit of armor while Sirius positioned himself perfectly for a rescue.

Sure enough, Remus rounded a corner, walking along sedately, reading. Everything was going just like Sirius had imagined. Though Remus was walking alone, there was another group of students slightly behind him. James gripped his wand, ready for action, while Sirius leaned against the nearby wall, trying to look nonchalant and innocent (usually a clue that he had something devious planned).

Just as Remus reached the designated target area, he slowed down and the other students started to catch up with him. Sirius looked significantly at James, urging him on with wildly wiggling eyebrows. James laughed silently at the strange expression, but managed to send off the spell anyhow.

Leaping into action, Sirius was ready to catch the one he was sure would be his future boyfriend. Instead, somehow, a very large Slytherin girl was tumbling towards him. Everything was going in slow motion: the huge girl, arms wheeling desperately for balance, and Sirius, trying in vain to get out of her way. She hit him full force, sending him crashing to the floor.

"Help," he cried from underneath the bulky young lady. "I've been crushed by a Slytherin!"

The girl scowled. "Scrawny little git," she muttered, elbowing him in the stomach as she levered herself up off him.

"Ooof."

Not bothering to try and hide his grin, Remus made his way over to Sirius, giving a wide berth to the annoyed Slytherin. "You okay?" he asked.

"Sure," Sirius replied from his position sprawled on the ground, eyes wide. This wasn't at all the way he had planned it. He was supposed to be rescuing his roommate, not lying confused on the floor of the corridor, looking like an idiot.

"Need some help?"

"Sure," he said again, wondering where all his vocabulary had gone.

Remus reached out, grasping Sirius' hand.

Sirius looked up at Remus, a bit dazed, and then at their clasped hands. Oh great Merlin, Remus is touching me. I'm never washing this hand again.

He was suddenly hauled to his feet, wobbling a bit as he found himself standing closer than usual to his crush.

"Umm, you can let go now, Black," Remus said as he tried without success to pull his hand away.

"What?"

"My hand. You can release it now." Remus was looking at him a bit worriedly.

"Right," Sirius stated, trying not to blush as he finally let go.

"You might want to stop by the infirmary and get checked out; it seems like you might have bumped your head or something."

"Okay," Sirius replied, still staring at Remus with wide eyes.

Shaking his head, Remus opened his book again and resumed his trek down the hallway, leaving Sirius to stare blankly after him.

"Good job, mate." James was behind him, snickering. "Really smooth. You are such a well-spoken sweet-talker. It's a wonder he didn't swoon. Though it looked like you sure did."

"Shut it."

"The plan went off without a hitch! You shrieked and fainted like a girl, right into his arms, and he rescued you from certain death. Ahh, sweet romance."

Sirius muttered something about needing new friends who weren't complete wankers.

ooooooooooooooo

Next Time:

"James, some day you'll make Evans a great wife."