Where you are, seems to be

As far as an enternity

Outstreched arms, open hearts

And if it never ends then when do we start

Maroon 5 - Sweetest Goodbye

Somehow they had ended up in the bedroom. The room was stripped bare, only her blanket and pillows were the sign that anyone had ever used the room. She led him over to the bed, her mouth never leaving his. He lay her down onto the bed and her mind was filled with flashbacks of the last time they had been in a similar situation.

(You did not think it was going to happen like this, did you?)

(I don't know what I think anymore.)

He had been so sad, so lost and she hadn't took the time to figure out why. She'd been mad with him and had let that anger grow until there was no way back. And then he was gone.

But he was here now. Real, flesh and blood. Lips and hands. She gave herself over to him, like she had wanted to back then. His lips were needy, his tongue hot. She sighed and arched up into him. Her hands moved to the hem of his shirt and pulled it up and over his head. He removed her clothes, his hands trembling slightly.

She watched as he looked at her, she felt shy and vulnerable under his gaze but she didn't try to cover herself. She wanted this. She was ready for this. He moved up her body and placed a tender kiss on her lips.

"I don't have any condoms. I didn't plan on this." Of course he could talk about it without any hint of embarrassment.

"Oh. Um, I do." She lightly pushed him off her so she could stand up. She could feel his eyes on her as she walked through to the other room in only her underwear. If she was going to do this, she was going to do it without being all shy and Rory about it. It felt daring, and she felt….sexy.

She rummaged in her backpack until she found the box. She came back to the room, Jess was sitting up leaning against the headboard. She tossed the box to him and he caught it in one hand. "Rory Gilmore owning prophylactics, whatever next?"

"My mum packed them for me in her special 'College Survival Kit'"

"These haven't been opened." he noted, pretending to read the box.

"No."

"So….you haven't? It'll be your first time?"

"Or I could have just used other ones…."

He raised an eyebrow at her in question.

"You'll be my first." She sat down next to him, and nudged him over with her hip.

"I don't want this to be something you'll regret."

"You've got me down to my underwear and now you're questioning whether it's the right thing to do?"

"Rory, I'm serious. This isn't going to change anything. I won't suddenly decide to go back to Stars Hollow and go to college."

"Jess, I know. I'm not trying to use sex as…I don't know, a weapon or whatever. I just want to be with you. I want you to be my first. I've always wanted that. I love you, and even if we're not going to be together after this, it's the right thing for me right now."

She hooked her leg over his and sat on his lap, and smiled as his hands settled on her hips. She leaned forward and kissed the corner of his mouth. She gasped as he turned his head and captured her mouth with his own.

And then there was only feeling. Pleasure and pain mixed together to make a delicious abyss in her brain, where all her fears and her rambling thoughts disappeared and it was just them. Rory and Jess.

They lay silent in the aftermath, the only sound of hearts slowing down. sweat cooling on their skin as they lay intertwined. Rory buried her face into his chest to hide her inane grin, she felt deliriously happy. He stroked her hair and kissed the top of her head.

"How are you?" He asked softly.

She nodded against his chest, "Fine."

"Jeez, I really was expecting an 'amazing' or a 'fucking fantastic' after that performance."

She looked up suddenly, "Oh it was! Jess, god it was-" She broke off when she noticed the smirk creeping across his features. "You're teasing me. Jerk."

"I'm sorry. Really, are you okay? Was it okay?" He took her face in his hands and brought his lips to hers soft and sweet.

"It wasn't what I was expecting." She told him shyly.

"How?"

"I was expecting all this pain, and to just kind of suffer but it was…..it was…..words fail me."

He nodded, seemingly content with that answer. "What about you? Was it….Was I…?" She asked, chewing on her lip and avoiding eye contact.

"I thought about this moment all the time. I used to sit for hours and daydream about having sex with you-"

"Jess, eww!"

"Hey, I was 17 and you'd get me so worked up that it was all I could think about! But, all those dreams and dirty thoughts well, they don't even compare. It was….it was perfect."

"Really?" She asked, beaming.

"Really."

She snuggled back down, her head on his chest her arm across his stomach. His arms tightened around her and she didn't think she could be happier. "I hate that it's over."

"I could probably go again." He joked.

"You know what I mean! I'm going to miss you."

"I know. Me too."

"Will you at least stay until the morning? Don't leave while I'm asleep, I don't want to wake up and think it was all a dream."

"I'll stay until morning." He promised.

And with those words and the warmth of his body and the steady beat of his heart in her ear she fell asleep, a smile playing on her face.