In My Veins

Chapter 10

Isaac

I was waiting for a call or a text message from Rachel telling me that she had rocked her NYADA audition. I expected her to tell me that Ms. Tibideaux or whoever came to see her was simply impressed and that they had immediately offered her a spot at the college. But I had to wait.

I was hanging out with some friends from school and the boys started playing soccer on the Xbox. Ryan was only shooting a goal and throwing his hand up in a fist when Justin threw him a dirty look.

Ryan laughed. "Oh come on, Jus. Don't cry."

Another dirty look. "I don't cry. I'm not a girl, remember?"

"Are you sure?"

I chuckled quietly. Ryan gave me a little wink before his eyes drifted to the phone in my hands. He groaned. Justin's gaze followed his and he rolled his eyes.

"Please tell me you are not waiting to hear from Rachel."

I grimaced. "No…"

Ryan shook his head. "I don't get why you haven't already made a move on her. You have been in love with her since… forever."

"And it's really getting pathetic now," Justin added.

They were staring at me with raised brows and I chuckled. "We're best friends," I explained in an attempt to change the topic.

"Seriously, dude? You are really using this as an argument?" The boys shook their heads.

"What? You only got the girl because Tony didn't make a move on his best friend."

He glared at me. "Yeah, and I'm a lucky man but if you really want to wait until another guy walks up acting all stunning like me… Don't start whining about it."

He was turning back to the game and Justin gave me a shrug.

I clenched my jaw. I knew how right they really were but I just couldn't risk our friendship. I was staring down on my phone again impatiently waiting for a message. When had I turned into such a sissy?

The time was passing and after an hour of waiting I decided to distract me. I grabbed Justin's controller under protest but he disappeared into the kitchen a moment later asking us if we wanted something to drink.

Ryan was shooting one goal after another and I clenched my teeth. What wasn't he good at?

An "Oh! No!" came from the kitchen.

Ryan and I were raising a brow at each other before Justin entered the room with an uneasy face. He was staring down on his phone and I furrowed my brows. "What?"

"I don't know how to tell you this, Isaac but... Rachel choked."

I coughed.

"Madison just sent me a text that she overheard Coach Corcoran screaming at Rachel. She somehow messed up the lyrics." He was meeting my face with an apologizing touch and continued. "She choked, Isaac. No NYADA."

I could feel every color leaving my face. She had what? Choked? No. This was impossible. I was grabbing my phone hoping for a message but there was none. Every few second I was staring down on the screen waiting for a sign from Rachel but the minutes just passed.

What had gone wrong? Rachel had been beyond prepared and there was no reason- NO. No, no, no, no. It couldn't be, could it? Was this about Jesse?

I shook my head. I had more important things to think of now. I took a look at my watch. Was Rachel home yet? I was grabbing my stuff together in a hurry and leaving the boys without another word. I was only noticing their wishes of luck along the way and starting my car faster than ever. How long would the ride take?

My thoughts started wandering back to the moment where I found Rachel leaning on the wall in the living room the day before. There were this small details that I just started noticing and my hands started clenching around the steering wheel.

A vision of her with tear filled eyes plopped into my head and suddenly, everything made sense.

Hypothetically.

I was remembering the day Jesse turned back home and was harshly telling Rachel to leave without a reason. After that she had successfully avoided spending too much time at our house. What the fuck had I missed there?

I saw a bright light at the road side and cursed. Slow down, buddy. Slow down. But how could I?

I was reaching our neighborhood soon enough but something made me stay in the car. I was taking a look at her house suddenly wondering what I was going to do?

Ryan's words were echoing in my head. I was closing my eyes and taking a deep breath before leaving the car and knocking on the Berry's front door a moment later.

"I'm so so sorry, Rachel."

I was embracing her and stroking her hair in comfort when she patted my shoulder. "It's okay, Isaac..."

No, it wasn't. I was cupping her face with my hands and looking into her beautiful brown eyes. The expression on her face was forced and I knew she was hiding something. The truth.

"It's not, okay? I know how much this audition meant to you and I can't even imagine what could have distracted you like that. But you're better than that, Rachel. I know you will convince Ms. Tibideaux to give you a second chance. And then you will proof her wrong for leaving. You will get to NYADA, okay? I know how you are and there isn't a single thing that is going to stop you." I was taking a deep breath, mentally preparing myself for what was about to leave my mouth. "I'm always here to support you." There was a tear glittering in her eye and I suddenly felt myself leaning down, pressing my lips onto hers.

Her lips were warm and soft and just like I imagined them to be. I was brushing her cheek and her eyes were opened wide after telling her "I love you, Rachel."

No reaction. I was close to getting uneasy under her stare when I heard glass shatter. Her head was turning around in alarm and only then I noticed the dark figure on the other side of the room.

Jesse was standing in the hallway just a few feet behind Rachel, a frame lying broken on the floor to his feet.

"What did he say? You choked on your NYADA audition?"

I didn't know what surprised me more. That my brother was actually here or that the harsh sound of his voice was betraying the reaction on his face after seeing Rachel and me together.

"Not that it's any of your business. But yes, I choked. No big deal."

I flinched. Her voice was cold but something inside of me was pleased with her reaction. I followed the direction her eyes were going and furrowed my brows at the frame to Jesse's feet. What was this all about?

"So that's none of my business, huh? Well, I could say the same about you! But you don't care about anything that I want, right? You just keep going on with your unrequested need to help everyone around you!"

My heart dropped. It wasn't the fact that Jesse was screaming at Rachel that made my eyes widen. But I knew my brother. He wasn't angry. He was frustrated. Frustrated because of something that I couldn't quite put my finger on.

The tension in the room was rising fast and before I could even react Rachel asked me to leave. I was dumbfounded. Just a moment ago I had finally worked up the courage to reveal my feelings to her and now she was actually asking me to leave her alone with my brother. Together.

I took a deep breath and gave her a small nod before throwing a last glance at Jesse and disappearing through the door.

"That's something whole different," I heard Rachel saying after closing the door.

"How so?" He laughed dryly.

I didn't want to eavesdrop. I didn't want to know what was going on between them but my feet didn't move.

"You never made the decision to become a law student yourself. Tell me how that's fair? I can live with the fact that I choked and that I won't get another chance because I certainly don't deserve it but you…"

"With which song did you audition?"

Their conversation was suddenly turning into a whole different direction and even I was surprised at the turn Jesse was making. It was suddenly something way more personal and I questioned myself why I hadn't even thought of this question.

I shook my head before I would regret it and walked over to the house next door.

I was burying my head in my hands when I reached the living room and plastered myself on the couch. And I didn't even know what to think anymore. Did I even want to think this all through again?

My phone was vibrating in my pocket and a message from the boys was flashing up on the screen.

How did it go? Everything ok?

I laughed dryly. I didn't know myself.

The urge of searching through Jesse's room flamed up in me but the moment I decided to get my ass up Jesse burst through the front door. Our eyes were meeting shortly and I imagined something like a apologizing look on his face when he walked into the kitchen and picked up the telephone.

I wanted to confront him. To ask him what this was all about. But instead he decided to make a call first. I clenched my hand into a fist and wanted to give him a huge piece of my mind on his priorities.

I was getting up again, walking up and down the room, trying to calm a little down and finally leaning myself against the desk in the corner of the room. My fingers were impatiently tapping on the wood of the table when my fingers where brushing something. Our initials.

J – R – I

I was taking a closer look on the table when I picked something of Jesse's conversation up. And it suddenly made me see why Rachel wasn't talking to me until the next day.

So I'm a little busy freaking out about Lydia and Parrish (yeay!) but now I'm back on writing for IMV and hopefully for AG and RITD in a bit, too.
I've planned everything out already (at least for the first two), I just don't find the motivation to write lately.
And yes, writing again is all Marrish's credit x3 (The hot training scene, though... *wiggles brows*)

I hoped you liked the little journey (haha!) into Isaac's head. Tell me what you think ;) R&R

July 1, 2015.