I do not own Kiba or Naruto. I don't own anyone/anything of the Naruto series at all.
Yes this is a YAOI fanfic.
If you don't like that, please, just don't read it.
For those who do,
ENJOY!R&R PLEASE\
Chapter Nine: The chasm of Despair and Path of Hope
Once back at home, Naruto walked straight to his room and lay down. He stared up at the ceiling just thinking. He tried forgetting about it, he tried to think of something else, but the dead silence and emptiness of the room made it impossible. No matter what everything somehow lead back to the thought of Kiba. Naruto felt his eyes tearing up; he quickly rolled over and smothered his face into the pillow. All he wanted was to feel Kiba next to him again: that empty bed was so cold. The lack of air Naruto was getting was making him feel dizzy and nauseous. He rolled over onto his back, now staring at the ceiling again. His eyes glanced over toward the window, his star shining brightly immediately caught his attention. "why…?" Naruto sighed, before rolling over onto his side and falling into a deep sleep.
For the next few days Naruto locked himself up in his apartment, just lying around being depressed. He was barely eating anything, and though he spent most of his time in the bed or on the couch he didn't get much sleep. He was just, existing.
"UWAAA! I'm full!" Chouji exclaimed, slamming his chop sticks down beside his 11 empty bowls. Kiba and Shino just eyed him curiously.
"Really? ...how the hell did that happen?" Kiba blurted out
Chouji's face turned deep red, he was just about to open his mouth to scold Kiba when he was interrupted by an obnoxiously loud yawn. "Excuse me." Shino said, "I'm a little tired…"
Chouji completely forgot what he was about to say. He paused for a moment then added, "Yeah, m-me too." He then turned and asked for the bill.
"Nice save." Kiba whispered into Shino's ear. Shino only gave a slight nod in return. "I guess I'm just really tired too."
Chouji rose from his seat "I'll see you guys later then."
"Yes, I must get home as well. Goodbye."
"Uhm, later…" Kiba stayed behind and decided to have another bowl. He didn't really feel like going home yet. While enjoying is noodles Kiba thought of Naruto. "Hm, I know he'd like a bowl right now." He said, chuckling to himself. "I wonder what he's doing…" [I haven't seen or heard from him in a few days now] he thought, and then remembered their last encounter.
"Naruto…?"
"Yeah?"
"What the hell are you doing?"
"I gave you a hug… is that bad…?"
"What? No… I don't know. It's just… fuck'n…. fuck'n no, Naruto. I'm going home. See you later, dude."
"Maybe I blew things out of proportion." [Is that why he hasn't been around? I didn't realize how crazy I got. Maybe he is mad at me: especially with him just coming out of the hospital and all. I should probably apologize to him… I know! I'll bring him some ramen! He'd like that!] Kiba finished off the noodles and set the bowl aside. "Excuse me!" he said, getting the chefs attention "Can I get one more bowl?"
"You eat anymore ramen tonight and you'll be as big as your friend who just left!" the chef joked
"Oh, it's not for me…" Kiba replied, laughing
"Ah, I see, one more bowl coming up!"
"Also, can you make it to go?"
"No problem!"
Kiba waited patiently as the chef fixed his order. When the chef was finished he brought the bowl over and sat it in front of Kiba, "This for a girlfriend?" he joked
"I wish!" Kiba exclaimed, laughing. The chef's face suddenly was overcome with confusion. "Well, I mean… I wish I had a girlfriend to bring this to."
The man started laughing again, "I see..." He placed his hand on Kiba's shoulder and said "You never know… someone may be waiting on you." The man laughed again and went back into the kitchen.
"Hm? HEY WAIT! I DIDN'T PAY YET!"
"Don't worry about it! That one's on the house!" the chef yelled from the back room.
"THANKS!" Kiba leapt from his seat and started for Naruto's house.
Naruto held the remote out continuously tapping the channel up button. "No… no... no... no... no... NO! SHIT! There is never anything on TV worth watching!" He turned it off and tossed the remote across the room. He lied down on the couch facing his ceiling, "Now what…" he sighed. Suddenly his stomach growled loudly. "Food time." Naruto rolled off the couch and lazily dragged himself into the kitchen. His home had become very messy; He had just stopped caring enough to do…anything. The trash bin in his kitchen was overflowing with garbage and the sink was crammed full with dirty dishes. The rest of the place was the same, clothes scattered everywhere, even more random dirty dishes lying around. It was terrible. Naruto began shuffling around through cabinets, tossing empty boxes right and left. Naruto hadn't even left his house since the incident with Kiba. Once he had thrown everything around, twice. He happened to come across a half eaten pack of rice cakes. He let out a sigh of relief and disgust as he mopped back over to the couch and plopped down with his dinner. Naruto took one bite of a rice cake and immediately spit it out, of course they were stale. Angered, he threw the box across the room and cursed it. The box of rice cakes happen to knock over a box full of books. When Naruto walked over to it the first thing he noticed was a crossword puzzle book. He picked it up and went back over to lay down on the couch he then found a pencil that was stuck between the seat cushions.
About 30 minutes just disappeared as Naruto became completely emerged in his puzzle. "Three letter word for introvert…?" Naruto stared blankly up at the ceiling "…shy?" He looked back at the page shocked that the word actually worked. "YES!" Though his celebration short lived, "Okay next one is… …WHAT THE HELL? 12 letter word for love of someone else's misfortune?" Naruto thought for a moment and then made up his mind, "SKIP!" As he was about to read on, the door bell rang. Naruto looked over at his clock and was curious who would be coming over so late. Maybe he woke his Neighbors with all the yelling. Naruto opened the door and to his surprise, there was Kiba.
"Hey Naruto." he said smiling.
"K-Kiba, why are you here…?"
"Kiba's smile quickly dulled out, "What do you mean? I was just dropping by."
"No, I just meant, why are you here… so late…?"
"Oh! I was down at Ichiraku's eating ramen with Chouji and Shino. After they left I got another bowl and while I was eating I thought about you, so I figured I'd bring you some. I haven't heard from you in awhile."
"Well yeah, you seemed pretty pissed at me the last time I saw you…" Naruto uttered
"Yeah, well, that's also why I'm here. I wanted to apologize for that. I honestly don't know why I blew up. It just kind of…happened." Kiba said, looking down at his shoes
[Aww, he is so cute!] "So you brought me ramen to say you're sorry?" Naruto said almost as if he was displeased
"Well…uh… yes." Kiba held the bowl out towards Naruto and gave a smirk.
"Good idea!" Naruto snatched the bowl and turned around to go sit down.
Kiba walked in and was blown away by how bad Naruto's place looked. He knew Naruto was messy sometimes but this was an entirely new extreme, even for him. "S-so… how've you been?" he stuttered, trying to walk without tripping. An assortment of noises consisting of slurping, grunting, and possibly words came from Naruto's mouth as he savagely devoured the ramen. Kiba finally made his way over to the table and sat across from Naruto, "You wanna run that by me again?" he said with a smirk growing on his face. Naruto continued eating but rose his hand and made a side to side motion inferring things had been "so-so". The smile that Kiba wore slowly began to fade as he thought, [Uhg, is it because of me? I didn't realize you were that upset. Geez… All this over a hu-…] Kiba stared downward again feeling ashamed. [I guess I did react harshly over a hug,]
"How've you been?" Naruto asked, still slurping on his ramen
Kiba promptly looked back up toward Naruto, launched from his inner thoughts. "Huh? Oh… I've been okay."
"Well, that's good to hear." Naruto held the bowl up to his face then began drinking the warm broth. When he finished Naruto set the bowl down and got up from the table. There was a slight hint of disdain in Naruto's voice when he grabbed the bowl from the table. Thanking Kiba as he threw the empty dish into the garbage Naruto realized he was probably coming off like an ass. Of course he was still upset about what happened but he rather be nice in the hope that somehow this would bring them closer. [He came all this way to bring me ramen… maybe things are… No! I'm not gonna get my hopes up again! Not until I get more solid proof.] Naruto decided at that point that he'd try and let it go and see what happens. After disposing of the bowl he returned to his seat and stared at Kiba with a slight smirk on his face.
"I'm glad you enjoyed it. I felt like a real dumbass after what happened."
"Nah, it's okay! You can't help but be yourself." Naruto said smiling widely now
"Yeah… HEY WAIT!"
"Haha! I'm just messin' with you! Calm down." Naruto waved his hand frantically while laughing
"Oh yeah, you're a real comedian." Kiba uttered rolling his eyes
"Oh come on! You know I'm funny. I always make everyone smile!"
"Hm, sometimes… maybe…" Kiba said sarcastically as he crossed his arms. Naruto stared at him crossing his arms in the same way. They both sat quite for a moment until finally Kiba smiled and broke the silence. "Okay, you win."
"I usually do…"
"Oh please!" Kiba shouted while laughing, Naruto eventually joined in on the laughter. After things started to settle down the two sat in a mildly awkward silence for some time. Kiba looked down at his watch and realized how late it had become, "Well Naruto I won't hold you up any longer. I'm sure you're tired and need some rest." Kiba stood and stepped away from the table
"Oh… yeah…" Naruto arose as well and walked towards the door, "Thanks again for the ramen." He said as he opened the door
"It's no trouble." He said as they stepped out into the hallway, "I just wanted to make sure we were on good terms."
"All good here!" Naruto said with a ridiculous smile on his face
"Good to know. I guess I'll see you later then Naruto…"
"Yeah sure… Good night Kiba." Naruto said as he turned to go back inside
Before Naruto had completely turned away he felt a hand on his shoulder stopping him. When Naruto turn back to face Kiba his body froze and he began to feel warm all over. Naruto suddenly realized Kiba had embraced him just like he'd tried to do on that day. Naruto was at first confused but didn't want to pass up this opportunity. He immediately snapped out of his daze and put his arms around Kiba.
"Goodnight Naruto." Kiba said as he slowly pulled away
Naruto didn't want to make things too awkward for Kiba so he didn't question him or say anything that might ruin the moment. He gave Kiba a pat on the shoulder and smiled as he said "Later Kiba."
Kiba gave a small grin and was off.
Naruto went back inside and as he closed the door behind him, he fell back against it in a state of bliss. He'd missed that soft and warm hug that only Kiba could give. Though he didn't want it to his mind began overflowing with thoughts and wishes. His optimism about his and Kiba's situation was back again and though he was happy he was also afraid. Naruto wanted things back the way they were so badly, this was a big step for Kiba, right? Naruto slowly traveled back to his room and collapsed onto the bed. [Did he do that because he felt like he had to? Did he really want to? He wouldn't have done it if he didn't want to right? Damnit! Why does he always know how to tear me apart inside?]
Naruto tossed and turned in his sheets fighting with himself over the meaning of the events that took place tonight. As he rolled around he glanced out of the window and Kitto glowing brightly in the sky caught his eye, Naruto hopped up and crawled over to the window, put his hands together and shut his eyes. "Please! Please! Please! Make sense of all this! What's going on in his head?" Naruto fell back down into his sheets staring up out of the window, "Whatever he is confused about… just help him figure it out…" Naruto rolled over onto his side and as he fell asleep he whispered, "Please… Make him feel what I feel…" Naruto's eyes slowly shut as he drifted into a deep sleep.
"Ah, I'm so tired!" Kiba yawned and threw his arms up stretching. [Hmmm, what a day: helping Ino in the shop this morning, training all afternoon, ramen with the guys, and…] Kiba stared up towards the sky [What's up with Naruto? Was he really that angry over the hug mishap? Geez, I know what I did was kinda rude but damn. He had to have had something else bothering him. …but what?] Kiba scratched his head trying to come to some sort of conclusion but he was just confused beyond reason. [Whatever is bothering him must be a pretty big deal. It seemed like he really needed a friend. …and when I hugged him… the way he positioned his arms around me and rested his chin on my shoulder… ] Kiba stopped walking, "What the hell am I thinking? Damn Kiba, it was just a hug!" he assured himself.
Kiba resumed walking and was shaking his head rapidly trying to fling the awkward thoughts from his mind. [I can't believe this is even running through my mind right now. I must be really tired! Yeah, that's probably it.] In the midst of his thoughts Kiba's attention was abruptly interrupted by something. There was an unusually large and dazzling star in the sky, Kiba couldn't take his eyes off of it. [Hmm, never seen a star like that before. That's pretty cool.] Kiba was strolling down the street with both hands in his pockets and his head in the clouds. [Seems like a good star for making wishes… need to give it a name.] Kiba didn't have to think very long, the name "Kitto" quickly jumped into his mind. "That sounds good!" Kiba continued down the star lit road with a cleared mind. For the last few moments of his walk home, he didn't have a worry in the world.
Finally Kiba was home, he walked inside the house and greeted his mother and sister, "I'm Home!"
"Ah, welcome home," his mother replied.
"Are you gonna eat?" his sister added.
"No, I'm not hungry. I'm just gonna go to bed, Good night!" His sister just nodded, and continued cooking.
"Good night!" his mom responded.
Kiba walked up the stairs, down the hall, and into his room. He removed his brown and tan hoodie and tossed it on the chair near his desk. After a deep sigh, he threw his arms up in the air, and leapt onto his bed. "I wonder if I'll run into him tomorrow. I can just bet he'll be asking me for ramen again soon." Kiba rolled over onto his side and grabbed a pillow, he was staring out of the window, up at the moon. After a minute he sat up and was now more focused on the stars. "Kitto…" he whispered to himself. Kiba crawled across his bed and opened the window. He laid his elbows along the windowsill and rested his chin on his arms. A cool breeze was gently blowing. It felt nice, and comforting. The smell of the night air and the feeling of the cool breeze relaxed his body and mind. Kiba fell backward onto his bed and slowly drifted off to sleep.
Not too long after he'd fallen asleep Kiba's older sister entered the room. "Hey Kiba…" she said as she took hold of his shoulder and shook him.
Kiba grabbed his sheets and pulled them over his head, turning on his side so his back was to her. "whaaaaaaaat?" he groaned
She stood with her arms crossed and wore an aggravated expression on her face. "Mom sent me up to remind you that she wants you to go out for groceries early tomorrow morning. You might want to get your shower now so you can sleep a little longer tomorrow…"
"I rather do it in the morning. It will help me wake up all the way." He replied still hiding under the sheets
"Whatever works for you. Just make sure you wake up and get it done." She said before leaving the room
Kiba tossed and turned for a moment trying to get comfortable but wasn't having any luck. He sat up sighing "Why the hell is it so cold in here!" As soon as he realized what he said he turned his head and saw that he'd left the window open. "Damnit…" he whispered, scooting over towards the window to close it. As he was shutting the window Kitto caught his eye once more. Kiba stared up into the sky wanting to make a wish but he had no idea what to wish for. Many things ran through his mind, but none of it seemed wish worthy. "Screw it! I've got nothing." He began to pull the window shut "I wish I knew what the hell was up with Naruto!" he said laughing to himself as he shut it all the way then lay back down. "Wish there was something I could do to help…" he said before falling asleep again.
Notes:
1. Just making this clear in case anyone forgot due to my long absence. "Kitto" means "surely" or "Definitely" anything to that degree really.
SO! I have been dormant for quite some time now right? I came back to this chapter repeatedly over that past years but just couldn't bring myself to sit and write. I had a really horrible case of writer's block I guess. Hopefully this problem doesn't arise again! I am happy to say that I have already begun work on Chapter ten so there shouldn't be a ridiculous wait like there was this time. I am very sorry to all those who are/were fans of this story and had to wait so long to find out whets going on! Some f you may have to read the other chapters again as a refresher because of the massive delay. Either way I hope you all can enjoy the continuation of NOSTALGIC NARUTO!