Disclaimers: Don't own any part of Gundam Wing nor it's characters. Merely borrowing them for a little torture.

Warnings: Shounen-ai (because I suck at yaoi) , mildly blasphemous in terms of my depiction of heaven. Not a death fic… ish. Usual 1x2, 3x4, and with 5 hanging in the wind. The poor darling.

Notes: Betaed by Keiran. Thank you.

Chapter 9: Breaking the Golden Rule

Shit, shit, shit!

Duo was panicking. He had gotten careless and spilled the beans on certain details of their friends lives, details he was not supposed to know, as Adrian.

Just how the hell am I supposed to wiggle out of this? He thought, his mind whirling. He found out in that moment that it was true that angels could read minds.

"Lie," Solo offered a suggestion.

Are you freaking mad? Duo screamed silently. At Solo's wince, he knew his friend could hear him.

Solo crossed his arms in front of him. "You have little choice," he poked his chin out at Heero, still staring at Duo suspiciously. "He's close to freaking… or thinking you're a stalker, or something."

God help me.

Solo chuckled, enjoying Duo's discomfort immensely. "Not a good idea. You are already missing without His knowledge. You might not know, but he could be thinking up all sorts of horrible punishment for you."

Duo shuddered. "Well, you tend to talk in your sleep," he hazarded a guess that Heero had slept over once or twice. Jealousy flashed through him, as understanding dawned, relaxing Heero's stiff expression. So he had stayed over. Just what was he doing staying over at this… trollop's place?

"Trollop?" Solo guffawed. "Trollop? Someone should really stop reading period romances!"

Duo growled, irritated. He stood up as Heero started leaving again. "Erm… can I come along?"

Heero turned on Duo so fast the other man took a step backward. "You want to come?" He asked incredulously. Apparently, similar invitations have been extended to Adrian before, but had been declined.

Duo was stunned. What idiot would decline time spent with Heero?

"A homophobic one, you twit," Solo added with malicious glee. "It just seems like you pilots found the gene for homosexuality that's all."

"Can I?" Duo asked, ignoring the little ghost he carried on his shoulder now.

Heero's stern countenance melted into a warm smile. "Of course. They have been dying to meet you."

Duo grinned excitedly. "Great, I have been dying to meet them as well…" Since dying is what I do best these days, he added to himself silently, sending Solo into laughter.

They left the house shortly after, with Heero suitably impressed with Duo's, uh, Adrian's skill at washing the dishes. Long stays at hospitals had given Adrian a severe disadvantage where housekeeping was concerned.

Solo hovered behind, careful to keep out of sight. He was going to keep a blasted eye on the troublemaker, even if it was the last thing he did. Something told him that it would probably be the last thing he did. Why did he have to listen to Duo anyway? Puppy eyes were extremely easy to ignore.

"So, where are we going?" Duo asked, bouncing enthusiastically next to Heero. He wasn't sure why he was so happy. He couldn't really touch Heero the way he wanted to, he was unable to tell Heero the things that he wanted to say but for the sappiest reason, it was enough for them to be walking side by side.

Heero shifted uncomfortably, unable to look at Adrian.

"What?" Duo asked automatically. Though Heero was normally hard to read, Duo had perfected the technique of reading his partner's moods long ago.

Heero shot the boy next to him a slightly confused look. Duo thought perhaps the Japanese wondered how he knew he was uneasy about something. "I'm… going to visit Duo."

"Oh," Duo muttered, not really sure how comfortable he would be, treading on his own grave. "Let's go."

Heero swivelled a look of shock at him. "Are you sure?"

Duo shrugged. "Why not?"

The smile that Heero gave him was bright, heartfelt, and made every moment worth it. They walked silently toward the graveyard, each lost in their own thoughts. Duo wasn't sure what Heero was thinking, taking Adrian, the person that caused Duo's death to visit him. Though technically, Heero didn't know that. Duo for one remembered the saying that if you shuddered for no particular reason, someone was walking on your grave. Would it work if he were walking on his own grave?

"You think some really sick shit, Duo," Solo commented from the side.

Duo gave his friend a half hearted glare while he waited for Heero to pick up his flower from the florists. From the way the young girl smiled at him before handing him the wrapped flower, Duo knew Heero was considered a regular.

It wasn't until they reached his grave, and saw the rather flashy looking gravestone.

Solo! You forgot to change it back, Duo screamed silently in panic, eyeing the horrible mottled colour Heero was turning.

The Japanese man ran forward, his eyes fixed on the inscription.

"How is this my fault?" Solo exclaimed defensively.

You were the one who changed the stupid thing!

Duo stood next to Heero, eyeing cautiously. The man was breathing heavily, his fingers clenching around the stem of the tulip. He wasn't sure if he should say anything then decided to risk it. "That's really funny. Did Duo really want that on his gravestone?" He laughed, albeit a little weakly. He peeked at Heero and saw that he was being looked at with some shock.

"You… you… you…"

Duo made a mental note to alert the presses. Heero Yuy was spluttering!

"You actually find this disrespect amusing?" Heero looked at the other boy disbelievingly.

Duo sighed. He was not really sure how to explain it to Heero without inadvertently saying something wrong again. "Heero, death is not all about grief. Sometimes death can be a release…" and I am not saying me, he shot to Solo who stood there with his arms crossed and a half amused smile on his face. "All things, even death can be taken with a pinch of humour."

The colour drained out of Heero's face as he took a step toward Duo. His left hand rose, reaching out to cup the American's cheek a moment before he checked himself and stepped away. He turned away from Duo, an angry flush staining his cheeks. He seemed angry with himself. Duo reached out, wanting to touch Heero but Solo intervened and he got a sharp whack on the wrist. He turned to glare at Solo but saw his friend's eyes surveying the graveyard worriedly. Solo was keeping a look out for something.

"He would have said the same thing," Heero said softly, after a long silence.

"Who?" Duo's attention snapped back to the man in front of him. Heero was staring down at the black stone. Oh, him. "So you are not going to rip it out of the ground and hunt down the person who had the talent to do this over night and not harm any of the vegetation?"

That made Heero realise that the feat had been pulled off without anything of the grave being disturbed. A confused frown furrowed his brow. Duo knew by now, Heero was thinking of every possible way for this to have happened. He nearly kicked himself for bringing it up.

"Hey, let's just call it a miracle, or him wanting to put a smile on your face and leave it as that?" Duo advised, hoping that it would be taken as such.

Heero looked stricken before dropping gracelessly onto the grass, trailing one finger down the smooth black marble. "How can he forgive?" He asked brokenly to no one in particular. "Would he want to?"

At this point, Duo had to be really careful to bite his tongue and not just blab out what could be potentially damaging to the current mood. Heero was finally unloading some of his guilt and he wouldn't really appreciate another odd invitation to bed. Why must everything be sexual? Steve really was deprived.

Duo rested his arm gently around Heero's shoulder, careful not to frighten the man away. "What have you done that is so stinking unforgivable? You didn't kill him, no matter what you might want to think, you didn't cut him up into parts, but instead saved a man's life…" for a short while, he added silently to himself.

Heero snorted softly, not looking at Duo. He was absorbed in studying the gravestone and tracing Duo's name.

Slowly, Duo's other arm snaked around Heero, easing in slowly, he didn't want to scare Heero off again. For the Perfect Soldier, his lover had become awfully skittish. "He wants you to forgive yourself," he whispered softly into Heero's ear, feeling him shudder and stiffen. The other man was tense behind his fingertips. "I don't know how I know," Duo finally chanced it. "But I know in my heart he is hurting just as you are hurting. He can't move on if you won't."

Duo half expected Solo to insert a jibe here but was surprised when he was met with silence. He sneaked a peek at the angel and noted Solo's horrified look of shock but he really didn't have time to care at the moment. He could taste his victory, Heero was merely inches away from finally realising his guilt, and perhaps getting on with the life he was supposed to lead.

A life without him.

Now, isn't that a whole lot more depressing?

"I don't know if I deserve to live," Heero said, his voice almost cold and completely emotionless, numb.

Frustrated, Duo pulled away from the other warm body and looked him straight in the eye. "Damn it Heero, stop being a baby. Suck it up and get your head out of your ass. I need you for backup and if you aren't there, who the hell can I trust to watch my back?"

Heero's eyes widened impossibly. Oops, wrong thing to say. Duo nearly bit his tongue off in annoyance. How could he say something this stupid? It was something leftover from the war. One of the many codes they used to encourage each other when one was close to giving up. It was also a rather screwed version of a declaration of love.

"Duo?" Heero breathed, reaching out to cup the face before him gently.

Shit. Shit. Shit.

There was a harsh intake of breath somewhere behind him but Duo ignored it. He shook his head rather vehemently. "No," he forced out, nearly taking all he had to lie to Heero. He couldn't, he mustn't. He wouldn't hurt Heero again when it was time for him to leave. And from the wary way Solo was looking around, he knew deep within him that time wouldn't be too far away. "No, it isn't Duo. It's Adrian."

Heero's almost dreamy expression cleared and he pushed Duo away in shock. "I'm… I'm sorry. I don't know what came over me."

Duo landed on the ground, pain vibrating up his back. He stared up the Japanese man and realised with a jolt of shock that this was his Heero. Not the Heero that had been pantomiming life for God knows how long. He stared at his hands. They were still tingling where they had touched Heero earlier. He had never felt that before. It felt… good, uplifting and from the easing of worry lines and guilt from Heero's handsome face, something had been removed from his soul. Something dark and painful. But who did it? Duo couldn't believe merely a few words would make such a difference. Who gave him his Heero back?

A small frown of concentration settled on Heero's brow and Duo knew that he had better try to get out of this pile of crap he had made fast and muse less on this change in Heero. Unfortunately, two voices beat him to it.

"How did you know what Duo used to say to me?" Heero asked, his expression sharp.

"Damn it Duo, the Archangels are here!" Solo yelped.

Shit, life just can't get any better than this can it?

Tbc…