Jesse gave Rachel a ride home. The Hudson-Hummel family offered, but she knew that her and Jesse needed to talk so she opted for a ride with him. Neither of them seemed to mind that most of the drive was silent except for the show tunes playing to fill the air. They had a lot to think about and deal with before they could confront each other.

When Jesse parked the car and walked up to the Berry household, he wondered how to begin. What do you say where there are so many things to explain – to need to be explained?

Sparing a look at Jesse, Rachel twisted the key in the lock, already prepared to come home to an empty house. Her dads had left for a two-day business trip. Although they didn't want to, she repeated how vital it was for her to keep a regular lifestyle. Their traveling was a normal thing. It was necessary for their job, which became a necessity for her too.

"My dads are out of town," she told him while dropping her things. The Berry clan had spent so much time at home together that it was weird to think the two were gone.

Grabbing her and Jesse some water, they both sat down on the couch and faced each other.

Who was going first?

"I guess I should start," Jesse said watching Rachel look down at her lap. Leaning his head on his hands against the back of the couch, he gave a sigh and tried to think back of where to begin. "Before I met you…no, even before that," he struggled. "I-…well…when…"

"Shelby asked you to get closer to me didn't she?" Rachel prompted in a calm manner as he stumbled. She stared at him straight in the eye; brave enough to face the facts. She had drawn the conclusion soon after things ended with her. It made sense that she had Jesse give her that push.

"She did," he said slowly. "She pulled me aside after Vocal Adrenaline's practice one night and explained that she was your birth mom and she wanted you to meet her. I didn't ask many questions and she didn't give many answers. We had this agreement that I would do it. At first it seemed like just a great opportunity to practice my acting skills so I could better myself for the future." He continued to stare at her, even when she shifted in her spot and looked away. "I did some research on you and then coincidentally found you at the library one day."

"That wasn't a set up?" she wondered thinking he probably was stalking her at the time or something. Jesse always took his work seriously.

"No," he chuckled, letting it fade from his face when he saw her neutral expression. "It wasn't. It was pure coincidence. You actually passed right by me when you dove for those music books. I thought that when you started heading towards me I was going to have to shake your hand and give you my autograph like most people, but instead you zipped right by me. It was like I wasn't even there."

Rachel blushed and bit her lip. "It really surprised me actually," he continued in a gentle tone, "I wasn't used to someone – especially a girl – just walk right by me without even recognizing me."

"I eventually did," she countered.

"That you did," he noted giving a smile.

"So our song wasn't…"

"Fake?" he questioned filling in her silence. "No, it wasn't." The fear visibly left her body and Jesse felt immensely guilty. Did she question everything in their relationship? "Rachel, I really didn't plan on seeing you that day. I put on my best game face at the time and walked over to you. I had no idea or intentional plan to sing with you that day like we did. We built a connection all on our own. You have to believe me when I say it just happened."

Rachel looked deep in thought, clearly conflicted in search of the truth. "All the research I did on you was basic," Jesse stated honestly. "I looked for what you liked, what you didn't, who you modeled after. I watched your video posts on your blog and researched what life goals you had set for yourself, but all of the minor details I discovered about you didn't even really describe who you at all. You're so much more than what I thought I had known."

She couldn't hold her stare to his yet and it caused him to sigh. Gently reaching to take her hand, he held the soft weight of hers in his own and gazed at it. "I fell for you without even realizing it. The time we spent together really struck something inside of me. I started to think about you, wondering what kind of things we would do next. Would we sing another great duet? Would we be called the power couple? And when I wasn't with you, I missed you. It was like I couldn't escape you."

He ran his other hand through his hair in slight frustration with himself. "That's when I tried to take a step back. I realized what I was doing and thought that with space away from you I could become more objective again. My mission from Shelby was just to get to know you, not to fall in love with you. It's why I made sure not to contact you over my spring break. I spent the time drowning myself with my friends at Vocal Adrenaline. I thought that as long as I didn't think about you, the situation would go away." He swallowed hard and admitted the hard truth. "It worked for a while. You weren't always constantly on my mind then and it felt like for a moment I could breathe."

Rachel listened to his words, taking her hand slowly away from his. It worked? He could breathe? Was she smothering him now then too?

"Rachel," he stated with a small beg. He didn't want to lose her. They were supposed to be okay – to make it through this.

"J-j-just…" she shut her eyes. "Just continue."

He gazed at her for a few seconds wondering if he should keep pleading with her instead, but decided against it. "I knew I couldn't escape you. When I arrived home to Ohio Shelby was already waiting for me. She was getting impatient with my progress and wanted me to push you."

Rachel swallowed the lump of growing tears in her throat. I couldn't escape you.

"So I returned to McKinley. I had every intention of being a different Jesse. I planned to amp up my cockiness because I knew how though you tolerate it, you also challenge it and the glee club hates it. So I thought, if I could even raise some drama in glee club it would make it so I didn't have to like New Directions as much." Jesse ran a hand over his face finding this so hard to do. He just wanted to hold Rachel in his arms and rock her, but by the looks of things it seemed she didn't want anything to do with him. She had distanced herself away from him to the far end of the couch, barely even able to meet his eyes.

"But then I saw you." He admitted. "I watched you spin around in the dance studio that day after spring break and all I wanted to do was touch you…t-to hug you. I needed you in my arms and to feel your body against mine. It was like everything I worked on playing out, had completely backfired against me. I hugged you and just… –it felt so right. It was like I was coming home."

Rachel sniffled and quickly wiped a tear away from her face. He was hurting her – again. Ashamed, Jesse glanced away, unable to take the pain. "I used your dream week assignment for glee club against you. I tried to prompt you in a way that would trigger your thoughts about the things missing from your life. When you happened to answer with you missing your mom it worked out perfect. Shelby had already given me a tape of her singing that she wanted to give you some how, so when we went looking through the boxes later that day in your room, I planted it in there and then acted like it seem like some type of big discovery when you found it."

Rachel gave a dark chuckle to herself. The two of them were such dramatic people and he played it so well. She had been fooled; completely and utterly fooled.

"When you wouldn't listen to the tape, I didn't know what to do. I couldn't bring myself to force you at the time and so I met with Shelby that night. I had every intention of calling the arrangement off with her. I did my part and then it was up to you to bring yourself to listen to the tape. But I met with her in her car that night and she looked so helpless. She was more vulnerable than I had ever seen her. She really wanted her daughter back in her life."

Right, Rachel thought sarcastically while looking up so her tears wouldn't fall again.

"So I forced you to listen to the tape. I meant to do it in the gentlest way possible, planning to be right by your side when you needed me, but when it came down to it, I couldn't be there. The look in your eyes…I was too ashamed of myself to sit there and play the comforting boyfriend when it was all my fault that you were in pain. Your reaction the next day became my out," he confessed. "After I found you in the girl's bathroom I decided I couldn't do this to you any longer. I used your meltdown as a chance to get away. As much as I liked you, I knew how low I stooped. My guilt was eating me up inside and so I walked away. I re-enroll at Carmel and took the week off to practice with Vocal Adrenaline again. I expected that you wouldn't want anything to do with me after I pushed you into listening to that tape. I thought that I would become a lost memory and you would be mad enough just to drop me from you life, but then you texted me and it changed things."

He waited until she somewhat looked at him. "I had no idea that Shelby would do or say those things Rach," Jesse said pleading with her. Desperately grasping for her, he hoped she would see the truth in his words. Staring again until finally he decided to take action by slipping his own hand under her chin to meet her eyes with his; he sat in silence. "I didn't know it would end like this," he said softly. When she pulled away again, he sighed. What could he do to make her believe him?

"I listened to you and your mom when you came in spying on us," he announced. That caught her attention he noticed. "I was in costume center stage."

It was him, she thought to herself. I knew it!

"At first, I was scared you had recognized me, but when I realized you didn't I stood behind the curtain off stage and listened to you and your mom talk. I thought everything had gone well. I must have left before Shelby had her meltdown and pushed you away."

"W-why did you say anything?" she wondered in this tiny voice Jesse had never heard before.

"How could I?" he questioned. Taking a sip of his water, he elaborated. "I didn't know what she had done until she came to McKinley High to see you. I thought things had gone great, especially when you stopped in again to see her." Jesse felt his emotions rising and the horror of what he had done was aching inside of him. "I know I messed things up badly. I-I just …I-…erg! Rachel…"

He was frustrated with himself, but what had hurt him even more was when she slid away from him. Curling herself into a ball, she rested her chin on her knees and looked away. "Please," she said in a soft voice "just finish."

Silence passed between them for a while until he caved in. Jesse needed to tell his story, he knew he needed to; he just wished it didn't hurt. "I decided that we needed to talk about everything. Sue had asked something about you not knowing this when I turned in my transfer papers and it hit me hard. I was ready to march across the auditorium stage to tell you everything when your mom beat me there. I stood in the shadows and watched yet another conversation between you too. I saw you cry when she left and blamed myself. I chickened out from going up to you and texted you instead. I thought it would bring you some peace until we funkified you guys."

Rachel let out a little sound at that, remembering how clear as day that was. "I didn't mean to be so harsh," he stated hoping she already knew that. "Vocal Adrenaline was getting on my back about my loyalties and it didn't help with those online posts about us. We had to stick it to you guys."

"And the eggs?" she asked in a hard tone. "Those were just part of it too?"

Her eyes were cold and harsh. She wasn't ready to buy his words just yet. "Rachel," he pleaded when she stood up.

She had turned away from him, only giving him a view of her backside as she ran her hand through her long hair and sniffled. Hearing his side of the story had hurt so much more than she expected. It was like all of his doings came back, slicing her heart into pieces once again. The healing marks on her soul were being ripped open.

"The eggs were Giselle's idea," he stated with his head in his hands while sitting on the edge of his seat. There wasn't anything he could say now except for the rest of the truth and he at least owed her that. "…And you know how that turned out."

"I do," she claimed with a shaky voice as she turned around. Keeping her arms crossed, she looked down at him.

"I don't know where to go from here," she told him with honesty. "I-I-I…I c-ca-can't…"

"Rachel," he panicked, getting up from the couch to stand in front of her. Hesitantly putting his hands on her arms, he took it as a good sign when she didn't flinch away. Bending his knees to become more eye level with her, she stared into his eyes. "We can go anywhere – everywhere – from here. You'll tell me your side of the story, and then we will take it one step at a time. No one will stop us, I promise. I won't let anyone get in our way. We can get through this Rach. We can be strong together."

Rachel let out a pathetic laugh. Strong? She felt so completely opposite of that right now.

Moving his hands upward, he cupped her neck and pushed her face upward. "We are made for each other. I'm not letting you go again. Screw Vocal Adrenaline. Screw Carmel. I'm done with your mom. All I want to do is be with you. If I have to go back to Lima, get slushied in the face and beat up those two bozo bullies too, I will."

She stared into his eyes like she was reading his soul. "Give me a chance," he pleaded.

The phone rang startling them both. It broke Rachel's thoughts away and she left him slowly, retracting away to go get it.

"Hello?"

"Rachel, hi, it's doctor Dillard. Do you think you could swing by the hospital to talk?"

"Is everything okay?" she wondered nervously, curling a strand of hair behind her ear.

"We have some more of your test results from the chemo treatments I would like go over with you and your dads. I thought I would make the phone call personally."

"Oh…well my dads aren't home. They are away on a business for a few days. But I can still come in if you would like."

"Why don't you do that?" the doctor said. Hearing a page over the PA system in the background, the woman became quicker with her words. "I am getting page right now, but I'll try to be as quick as I can. I'll see you when you get here."

"Okay, sounds good. Thanks doctor." Hanging up, Rachel bit her lip nervously. She was running out of options and if this one failed too then she was really going to be grasping for options to save her life. Was this it? Doomsday?

"Rach?" Jesse asked coming to find her after a few seconds of silence. "Is everything okay?"

"I- um…I need to get to the hospital," she told him going to gather her things.

Following right on her heels, he began to worry. "Are you feeling okay? Did you need me to drive you? What's going on, is something wrong?"

"My doctor just needs to talk to me. I'll be fine."

Watching her frenzy around the room completely apprehensive, he caught her by the elbow and slowed her down. "Let me take you," he commanded in the calmest voice.

It instantly soothed her and she scolded herself when she realized it. Staring at him for a few seconds, she faltered in her thoughts and nodded to him. Each grabbing their things, they headed out to his car and drove off in silence.

Jesse kept looking over at Rachel with every spare moment he had while they were confined in the vehicle together. She kept to herself, just staring out the window with her hands in her lap, leaving him with so many questions and nervous feelings. What was going on? Were they going to be okay? Was she? Could he get a second chance from her? What did her doctor want? Did she accept his story? Should her dads be here with her right now?

Pulling into the parking garage, they quickly found a spot and walked in the building. She hadn't said a word to him since they left the house. She wouldn't even look at him. What should he say?

Rachel led Jesse to the cancer hospital wing, checking in at the front desk to tell them that she was here for when her doctor was ready. Waiting in the waiting area, she impatiently sat there with Jesse until she couldn't take it anymore.

Heading off to the kid's cancer center, she went to go find some friendly faces. While being at the hospital for long weekends and hours on end, she had come accustomed to meeting other kids like her – or kids with more extreme cases in this wing. They had all been like a small knit unit when they were there. Most of everyone's' time was spent in that lumpy bed where it was whiter than white light and more sterile than a germless bubble; they all had things to do besides what was in their empty hospital rooms and that was trying to maintain a normal life.

"Rachel!" Lucas perked up seeing her come in the room. Lucas was a 10-year-old, pale white, hairless child going through stage four leukemia. His parents were praying for a miracle, but so far none had come and he was getting worse.

A smile ran across Rachel's face and she walked over to him. "How are you doing?" she wondered.

"I've had better days," he told her while playing with a tower of blocks in front of him. "How are you? Getting any closer to your miracle?" he wondered.

"We'll see," she told him with a small shrug. "Dr. Dillard wanted to see me today, so I'm hoping she'll have good news."

"Me too," he smiled at her. Wrapping her arms around him, she gave him a side squeeze.

"Hey Rachel?" he wondered while she zoned out for a few seconds. Raising an eyebrow at him, Lucas gave a nod to the doorway. "Who's that?" Turning to look to whom he was referring to, she realized it was Jesse. He was standing with his hands in his pockets against the doorframe, looking at her and the unknown child.

She gave Lucas a smile and then got up, walking over to Jesse and taking his hand. She wanted to chuckle at his surprised face when she reached for him, but she realized what she was doing and so she dropped his hand and hid the gesture, feeling still so unsure of their relationship.

"Lucas, this is my…m-m-y-y friend Jesse," She said stumbling over what to call him. Friend? Competition? Boyfriend? Ex-enemy?

"Nice to meet you," Lucas stated first, noticing how the Jesse guy had been solely focused on Rachel in those moments, until he spoke up.

"You too bud," Jesse said kneeling down to be more level with him. "So how'd you two become friends?"

"We happened to be in the same place at the same time," Rachel shrugged with a small smile and laugh to Lucas as they bumped shoulders. Whenever she talked to him, Jesse noticed there was a twinkle in her eyes. She really liked this boy Lucas.

"We sat next to each other while getting our chemo," Lucas clarified proudly. He too had that same sparkle in his eyes when he glanced at her. Even though he looked very sick, he held this happiness with him.

Jesse looked to Rachel for a second before leaning over to Lucas with a hand covering part of his mouth. "She's a talkative one isn't she?"

Lucas laughed and Rachel's smile grew. Maybe he could win her over with Lucas's approval.

The three of them talked for a while. Jesse had Lucas laughing which had Rachel smiling. He liked that look on her face – a smile. Jesse liked that he could make her have that and even make her laugh once or twice. It was much better than before.

They were interrupted when a little girl no more than five ran up to Rachel and gave her a big hug around her neck. Jesse guessed she couldn't have been more than 30lbs, looking so skinny and frail. He could tell she was going through cancer treatments too by the way her blonde hair was thinning and she looked tired. Turning a bit, Jesse saw the girl's parents, both standing there hugging each other while smiling at their daughter's and Rachel's interaction.

"Why hello Ms. Callie," Rachel cooed, giving the girl's belly a tickle.

"Song," She said shyly with a finger in her mouth.

"Yeah!" Lucas said with bright eyes as he agreed. "Do a song Rachel!" She looked at the two of them smiling.

"Can you sing too?" Lucas questioned to Jesse. Jesse gave a smirk and looked to Rachel who was looking at him in the gentlest of ways. "Yeah, he can" she said proudly.

"Duet!" Lucas exclaimed while Callie just clapped waiting to hear a song.

Silently checking it with Jesse, she saw him waiting for her.

"Callie, go get that instrument!" Lucas said pointing to the other side of the room. Callie's mom went to grab it while Callie just smiled and hugged Rachel. Holding it out, Jesse took it from the woman, replying with a quick "thank you".

"What song should we do?" he wondered to the group of them.

"I don't know," Lucas shrugged. "Rachel usually just thinks of one."

"Rachel?" Jesse asked with a raised eyebrow. How many times had she done this for them? How often did she have to come here? How had he not known about this? The blank stare on his girlfriends face had given him the advantage he wanted, and he started to strum the guitar.

"Come up to meet you, tell you I
'm sorry
You don't know how lovely you are
I had to find you, tell you I need you
Tell you I set you apart"

Rachel knew the song, quickly ready to jump in. "Tell me your secrets and ask me your questions
Oh, let's go back to the start
Running in circles, coming in tails
Heads on a science apart"

"Nobody said it was easy
It's such a shame for us to part
Nobody said it was easy
No one ever said it would be this hard
Oh, take me back to the start

I was just guessing at numbers and figures
Pulling the puzzles apart
Questions of science, science and progress
Could not speak as loud as my heart

Tell me you love me, come back and haunt me
Oh when I rush to the start
Running in circles, chasing tails
Coming back as we are

Nobody said it was easy
Oh, it's such a shame for us to part
Nobody said it was easy
No one ever said it would be so hard
I'm going back to the start

Oh ooh, ooh ooh ooh ooh
Ah ooh, ooh ooh ooh ooh
Oh ooh, ooh ooh ooh ooh
Oh ooh, ooh ooh ooh ooh"

When they were finished, they stared at each other. The feeling of singing together again was still exhilarating. They both got that same feeling of being on a rush, similar to the first time they sang with each other, and there was this soft warm hum between the two of them, like a steady buzz of good emotions. Keeping a lock on one others eyes, they conveyed an unbearable need. Jesse wanted to just reach over and grab her, to then bring her to his lap only to kiss her senseless. He saw it in her too – the firey passion. Soon enough though, he saw her walls slowly come back up.

No, let your guard down, Jesse tried to convey with his eyes. I won't hurt you again – I'll try my hardest, I promise.

Breaking the stare when they both heard clapping, Rachel smiled and opened her arms wide to give both to Lucas and Callie a hug.

"Rachel?" A brown haired doctor asked coming into the room. She was waiting patiently with a file in her hand and a white lab coat on. Assuming this was the doctor, Jesse nervously got up with Rachel, silently saying his goodbyes to the little kids as he went to follow her.

"Jesse," Lucas said calling after him. Turning, he saw the kid give a small smile. "You're pretty good. Not as good as Rachel but I like you."

Jesse laughed at the kid's approval, going back for a fist pump before running off to find Rachel. No one was as good as her, but he could try anyways.

A/N: Review!