Dean had somehow managed to fall asleep despite the fact that it had been impossible to do so for the last several months, and had been having a pleasant dream in which he had been playing with his brother back before everything had gone all pear-shaped, and Dad got mad and kicked him out when Anna showed up.
"Oh, my...Zachariah is going to shit a brick when he finds out." Anna said when she looked around at her surroundings.
"Finds out what?" Dean asked in a tone that seemed to state that if Zachariah found out anything that he didn't want him to know, a certain someone would suffer torments that made what Hell had to offer look like a day in the park.
"That I, er, completely failed in the clever plan to get you to say yes to Michael which I only agreed to go along with in order to escape and help stop the Apocalypse using any means necessary, including going back in time and killing your parents in order to prevent Sam's birth, and possibly even yours, and I can't believe I just said that..." Anna said all in one breath.
Dean looked at Anna in anger and disgust.
"I can't believe that I loved you." Dean said. "That I...Dear Dad!...I had sex with..."
Dean promptly woke up, leapt out of his motel room bed and started vomiting in the nearest toilet.
"Dean, why is there a toilet in the middle of the room?" Sam who had been watching an infomercial on t.v. asked.
"Me...Anna...Sex..." was all Dean had managed to choke out by way of explanation before he started vomiting again.
"Oh." Sam said before turning back to the television, pausing, and looking somewhat squicked. "Ohhhhhh."
"Hi guys!" Gabriel said when he turned up from wherever it was he wandered off to when he wasn't bothering the...er, helping out in the stopping of the Apocalypse. "I need to have a little...Why is there a toilet in the middle of the room?"
"Dean had sex with Anna last year." Sam replied, looking slightly disgusted, as he changed the channel to another infomercial that was marginally more interesting than the last one.
"And that...Ohhh. Yeah, that's a good reason to have a toilet in the middle of the room." Gabriel said, looking slightly ill himself. "You'll have to bring the toilet along with you Dean, because I need to talk with you for a minute."
"So, what's this about?" Dean asked a minute later when he and Gabriel were somewhere isolated. The toilet had not come along for the trip, and would later be found by a rather puzzled member of the motel cleaning staff who would stand there and rather stupidly say "Why is there a toilet in the middle of the room?" after Sam and Dean checked out the next day.
"I figured out how you...became you." Gabriel said after looking about to make sure they were truly alone, since little pitchers, and little Castiels who were on a hunt for God had big ears. "I believe that time travel may have been involved."
"Unstable loop?" Dean asked.
"Yep." Gabriel replied as he created and started licking a giant lollipop (which was rainbow colored and blue raspberry flavored, for those who want to know).
"So, where do I..." Dean started, before Gabriel poked him in the forehead.
"...Go?" Dean finished, finding himself on his old family lawn at some point before he was conceived.
He went to the door, and knocked on it. After a couple minutes of waiting, it was answered by John Winchester who was wearing way too much cologne for some reason.
"Hi dad." Dean said before pushing his way into the house, stopping in the living room, and pulling things out of the bag that Gabriel had apparently shoved into his arms before sending him to the past.
He then used the items from the bag to summon a certain Archangel who somehow managed to get John Winchester to consent to be his vessel in under five minutes.
"What did you...? What the...? Why...?" Michael said.
"Son of a bitch wouldn't say yes, so I was forced to use alternative methods." Dean replied. "You've got five minutes, now hop to."
"Five minutes...You mean?" Michael said.
"Four minutes-fifty." Dean said, rather pointedly looking at his watch.
Michael left to do what needed to get done. John Winchester was left a drooling wreck upon his departure.
"Unbefuckinglievable." Dean said before healing the elder Winchester.
"Bye Dad." Dean said before cleaning up the mess he'd made and leaving.
"What the hell just happened?" John asked no-one in particular, as no-one else was there.
After a moment of thought, John raced back to his bedroom and grabbed the joint he'd been smoking before he'd answered the door, and the bag of pot he'd hidden in the nightstand, and raced into the bathroom and flushed the both of them down the toilet.
"Knew that deal was too good to be true." John said as the joint and the baggie vanished into the sewer system. "I don't even wanna know what kind of plant that really was."
Meanwhile, a certain Archangel was trying to figure out how to tear out his Grace. It wasn't like he had someone who had fallen before to provide an example of what to do.
At Four Minutes, Fifty-nine seconds, he was finally reasonably certain he had an idea as to what he was doing, and with a couple milliseconds to spare, Michael and his Grace were streaking out of the sky and headed towards Lawrence Kansas where one Mary Winchester was walking out of a grocery store where she had been buying snacks for herself and her husband.
By the time she got home, unaware of the extra burden she was now carrying, she was disappointed to discover that A) all of the weed was gone, and B) it might not have even been weed in the first place.