30 Hugs, Theme 10; Just a Memory

You Should Hate Him

When they first met, Lloyd was wounded. Zelos could see the pain in the boy's eyes as his gears shifted to flirt with the other Chosen... and he hadn't thought about it again for some time, because he didn't really care. He stuck his fingers into the mesh of the group in order to blend and have them trust him, and he found it a bit too easy. Although Genis, Sheena and Raine found him hard to tolerate at times, they all just seemed to brush off his teasing as a part of his personality. They accepted him because they had no reason not to. Even Raine, the most skeptical of them all in comparison to him, seemed to take him in stride as a part of the deal. They needed him to walk around Tethe'alla, so she would take him so they could wander Tethe'alla.

He analyzed their personalities so he could answer so he would be able to say what they wanted to hear, and it was easy. Rather than being himself and taking the easier way, he just told them that he would do the 'right' thing, and everyone seemed equally satisfied. Zelos, on the other hand, felt dirty.

And then they went to Sybak and that man showed up, choosing not to give Zelos even a passing glance. The Chosen decided to stay silent rather than acknowledging his existance until after he left.

"Man, what an arrogant S.O.B.," Zelos grumbled, being subtle about his own feelings once again. "Talking as if he knows everything."

"Yeah, well..." Zelos could see it again. The wound he had first seen in Lloyd's eyes had been opened again, but Lloyd was covering it up by being aggressively defensive. Zelos knew that act. "Let's just go see Kate."

They did what they were supposed to. They went to Kate to prove they'd saved their half-elf friends, but Zelos' mind was elsewhere as they chose to finally spend the night at Sybak rather than going anywhere that evening. Zelos was sprawled out on his bed when Lloyd returned from taking a shower, a towel over his head as he ruffled his hair violently. Zelos watched in amusement as the boy pulled the towel from his head with a "bwah!"

"What are you looking at?" Lloyd asked, turning slightly away as if Zelos might pounce on his topless self.

"Hmm, not much," Zelos replied with a snarky grin, glancing in the other direction while Lloyd dried off his toned arms and picked at a scab that was probably a week or two old. "Who was that guy we ran into earlier? You acted as if you knew him."

Lloyd made a soft sound, almost as if he didn't want to talk about it as he busied himself with drying behind his ears. "Kratos," he said quietly, trying to look serious but pouting instead.

"I thought so. You've mentioned him before," Zelos said, sitting up in bed to regard his friend. "But you never actually told me what was up with him. I'd kinda like to know."

Lloyd sighed, as if it was something he didn't want to get into, but he turned the light off casually in the bathroom before crossing the room and sitting heavily on his bed, his arms tangled in the towel he let sit on his lap. "Kratos was a mercenary. He joined up with us right at the beginning of the journey of Regeneration and stayed with us the entire time. He was kinda shady, but I gave him the benefit of the doubt and didn't really think about it. But when we got to the Tower of Salvation, he betrayed us!" Zelos watched in silence as a fire eurupted in Lloyd's eyes to hide the hurt. "He was an angel of Cruxius the entire time, and we never knew until he stabbed us in the back!" Lloyd fiddled with his hands under the towel as he sighed as he threw himself back against his pillow. "I didn't even think not to trust him for a second! How could he just toss us away like that?"

Zelos hummed thoughtfully as he folded his legs under him and sat up to pay attention to Lloyd. "Do you hate him?"

"I don't know," Lloyd said, rolling over and turning his bare back to Zelos. "I don't like thinking about it. We trusted him, you know? And now he just comes back in telling us what to do..."

"Where are you going to go?"

"Back where I came from. You aren't the only one who needed help, you know."

"Yeah, but..."

"I know I don't acknowledge you often, Zelos, but you've grown quite skilled on your own. You've learned much. I've appreciated having you as my student."

"Yeah, right! You mean what you say just as much as everyone else does!"

"Zelos?"

"Hmm?" Zelos responded, arching his eyebrows and smiling on instinct. "What is it, bud?"

Lloyd was now lying on his side, facing Zelos instead. "You just got all quiet there for a second."

"I just thought of something is all," Zelos said with a shrug. "Only a memory."

Lloyd was fixing him with an odd look. One of those 'you ask weird questions' kinds of looks.

"I'm gonna get my shower now," the Chosen of Tethe'alla announced with a flip of his hair. "After all he's done to you, Lloyd... I would hate that guy, if I were you," he said as he passed the younger man as he crossed the room.

"I'm trying..." Lloyd sighed quietly, and the distance between them was closed by a door.

When Zelos emerged, he was satisfied to find Lloyd pretending to be asleep. He flicked off the light and immediately went to bed, knowing he wouldn't be able to hide the anger that had tightened in his chest.