(If you're one of the six current people following this fic and was alerted to this chapter being uploaded I just wanted you to know the page before this chapter was updated with a chapter of it's own, thought I should state this so no returning readers misses this fact and gets confused.)
Gerald arrived beneath the bridge specified in the email but no one was there and he became more paranoid, he waited a few minutes before turning around to leave but as he made his way back to the top of the bridge in the direction of home a dark cloaked figure appeared behind, startling him.
"Hello Skankhunt." The figure whispered from behind "Sorry for being late there was another matter I had to take care of on my way here."
"Who are you?" Gerald asked afraid to turn around
"I am Mysterion and I am here to take you in."
"But before I do so, I need to ask you some questions."
"Are you a cop?" Gerald asked nervously
Mysterion opened his mouth to say something but was interrupted by a larger figure appearing from the shadows who then tackled Gerald to the ground and lashing their claws into the unarmed man's face.
"I should of known Skankhunt42 was a Jew this entire time!" "No, I knew he had to be but I didn't want to believe my bigoted thoughts!" "You motherfucker!" The Coon yelled out extremely pissed off, Mysterion snapped out of his stupor grabbing a hold of Coon's arms and attempted to pull him off the man "Cartman calm the fuck down before you kill him" Mysterion shouted before Coon shoved him away "No fuck off Kenny, I don't care if he's Kyle's Dad I'm gonna rip his head off and give it to Stan's gay dog before using the rest of his remains as-" Coon was interrupted from his rant as Mysterion hit him "Damn it Kenny I-" Mysterion hit him again "Kenny stop that!" And again... "God damn it Kenny!"
Coon kicked Mysterion far which caused him to nearly fall off the bridge, grabbing hold of a railing to keep himself from falling into the water below
"Fuck off Kenny." Coon said looking down at the kid whose hands were having a bit of a hard time keeping grip
"Cartman... You don't have to be the bad guy here..."
"Oh no, don't you start with that crap again." Coon rolls his eyes "He is the bad guy here, him" he pointed "Don't go trying to guilt trip me, it didn't work last time and it won't work this time either."
Coon's last sentence gave Mysterion an idea "What about Kyle."
"Screw that Jewish asshole."
"He feels awful for what he and the others did to you." Mysterion mentioned
"Whatever, he's probably pleased with himself even after finding out I was innocent." Coon argued
"He still seemed bothered about it the last time I talked with him."
Cartman raised an eyebrow "Why?"
"Why not ask him yourself, but I doubt he'd want to talk about it if you end up killing Gerald."
"I really hate you Kenny..." Coon grumbled before pulling up Mysterion by his hood
"Hey watch the costume fatboy."
"Shut your goddamn mouth before I throw you back off!"
"Channel that rage dude, no promises but we might need it in the interrogation." Mysterion said causing a grin to form on The Coon's face.
"Huh, what..."
"Where the heck am I?" Asked Gerald as he raised his head and looked around
"Ah, you're awake." Said a fat shadowy figure walking towards the man "Perfect."
"Bru... Bruce Vilanch?"
"No, Not god damn fucking shit ass Bruce Vilanch!"
"I am The Coon!" Coon grunted angrily "K-... Mysterion, can I kick his ass some more after this interrogation?"
"You promised me that I could beat the shit out of him." Coon retorted
Mysterion just walked towards the two and raised his hand to Coon signaling him to back off a bit Coon just cursed at no one in particular under his breath before grumpily complying though keeping his sight on the asshole they have caged up in the jail cell of Coon's lair.
"Oh, you're just kids..."
"Hey wait a minute, you're the ones who attacked me at the bridge!"
"Gerald." Mysterion calmly said
"How do you know my name."
"I know a lot more than just your name, such as you being the father of Kyle and Ike Brovloski, and that you're a lawyer."
"Who... Who are you guys?" Gerald asked still not sure of the situation he's in. "We're Coon and friends duh." Thought Coon
"This conversation isn't about us, it's about you."
"All I want to know is why."
"Why are you Skankhunt." Mysterion questioned Gerald
"It's Skankhunt42, and I'm not telling either of you anything." He stated
"Well then I guess we're going to be here for a while..." Mysterion said before gesturing to Coon to assist him in the interrogation
"About fucking time, I was getting bored watching you play pussy good cop."
"Now..."
"Tell us everything or I'll rip your balls off with my bare hands!" Coon said angrily
"You wouldn't do that." Gerald wasn't amused with the two kids, thinking this situation is just plain ridiculous
"With my bare hands damn you." Coon repeated with a bit more intimidation and a small spark of static escaped out of him
"What the fuck was that?" Gerald asked taking notice
"What was what?" Both Mysterion and Coon asked simultaneously
I actually had this chapter done for a while now, you may have noticed Dildo Swaggins is not in this chapter and I don't plan on having him meet Gerald ((though that may change later on it just depends,)) this chapter and the one before this were written before his character was introduced and after some thought I decided to keep him out. Truth be told this originally was going to be only a two shot fanfic and I never planned on writing past those two first chapters, but it has taken its own route now and since I've made it this far I might as well keep going, sadly this means Heiman won't appear either, however there will probably still be references to future episodes of season 20. get over it.(Cartman)