This chapter is in loving memory of Jackson McCoy. He was one of our first reviewers and made us laugh with his comments. He will be missed!
Disclaimer: Stephenie Meyer owns. We don't. Surprised?
Thanks to my lovely co-author TwiReaderAbi for her insight, comments and general patience regarding this chapter. I can see eye rolls even across the country. I'm good like that. Thanks also to Irritable Grizzzly. She betas this hot mess and makes it look presentable with commas and everything. To say she rocks would be an understatement.
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There is a bit of citrus ahead. Just a taste…
Let's see what these crazy kids are up to.
I don't care if monday's black monday you can hold your head saturday wait dressed up to the eyes
tuesday wednesday heart attack
thursday never looking back
it's friday I'm in love
tuesday wednesday stay in bed
orthursday watch the walls instead
it's friday I'm in love
and sunday always comes too late
but friday never hesitate...
it's a wonderful surprise
to see your shoes and your spirits rise
throwing out your frown
and just smiling at the sound
and as sleek as a shriek
spinning round and round
always take a big bite
it's such a gorgeous sight
to see you in the middle of the night
you can never get enough
enough of this stuff
it's friday
I'm in love
The Cure - Friday I'm in Love
I .believe she was going out with that Jake guy again. I was steaming, beyond pissed. What was she thinking? This guy was a total punk. Well, I didn't actually know him, but he just couldn't be good enough for her. Because, to be honest, she was pretty great. She made me laugh. She was smart. And she was beautiful, but not in the usual way you would define the word. Her beauty came through because she was so quirky and funny. There was nothing fake about her. I mean, even her breasts looked real.
I knew she was really mad at me right now and that I had acted like an asshole. If it came right down to it, I couldn't admit I was jealous. I was also maybe a little hurt. I thought we'd had a great time the other day. It wasn't like we were exclusive, but I guess I was just caught off-guard.
I had to get her to go out with me again and I went over my list of date options. It had to be something different. Even with this heat, I couldn't see taking her to the pool party at the Roosevelt Hotel. We would both be uncomfortable and I felt like I had to keep her away from people who actually knew me, especially all the women I'd fucked there.
I could bring her to any restaurant in Los Angeles but again, she didn't seem like the kind of girl who would be impressed by that either. I was at a loss. Movies? So cliché. That would be somewhere that Jacob would take her. Then I came up with something. My Father frequently donated to the Getty Museum. I could ask her if she wanted to take the Garden tour. I smiled and gave myself a pat on the back. It would be our first "date".
Man, I was turning into such a pussy, but I had to get myself in there before Jake sunk his claws into her. He took her out on dates and opened doors for her and shit. Every time I got near her, I said or did something incredibly asshole-ly. That needed to change and it would start by me asking her on a date and being sincere about it. I couldn't wait until Monday morning.
I ended up going out with Emmett Sunday night to the Key Club where we drank way too much. Sure, I had girls approaching me all night, but after seeing how natural Bella was, all these girls seemed so "plastic" to me. I loved how great she looked in just a tank top and jeans. Even with no cleavage sticking out and loose-fitting jeans, she looked beautiful. I actually wanted to see how she looked first thing in the morning. I smiled to myself in anticipation. What has happened to me? It was like a switch was flicked and I couldn't go back to that other guy.
Monday morning, I ended up waking up really late. I immediately ran to the kitchen window and sure enough she was out there. I could only see her feet on the passenger side window and smiled as she wiggled her bare toes. I decided to shower and shave before I went out there. I'd never really asked a girl out on a date before and it wasn't like I could practice on Emmett, though I should have asked for his advice. Too late now. Maybe I should call Alice. No. There was no way in hell I was practicing on my sister. That would be way too creepy. I could possibly just call for advice, but sometimes she could be really focused, like the last time, and others she could go on for days and she'd wind up psyching me out even more. I'd just have to wing it and pray for the best.
After showering, shaving, and trying to tame the 'fro, I went to grab her a beverage. I looked at my selection. The Perrier could seem too snooty, but the Diet Coke would make her think I thought she was fat. In the end I went for the Perrier, figuring it was the safest choice. She already thought I was kind of pretentious.
She watched me as I approached her truck. Then she laughed and I had to smile. As she sat up slowly, she looked at me as if I might bite her. I held out the Perrier and she took it cautiously
.
"Bella." Cool as a fuckin' cucumber. Masen strikes again.
"Hey," she said as she narrowed her eyes. I stared back quietly. As excited as I was to ask her out on my first "real" date ever, she was not going to win this stare-off.
She lasted all of five seconds. I smiled in triumph.
"So, are you here to tell me I'm an idiot again?" I raised an eyebrow. I didn't even remember calling her an idiot. I may have thought it at one point, but had I really said it out loud?
"I never called you an idiot." I tried to sound sure of myself.
"You're right, you never specifically said the words, but you implied it, which I think is actually worse," she said in a snarky tone of voice.
I tried to hide the smile on my face by running my hand over it. Looking everywhere but at her, I asked if she had a good weekend, wanting to only hear a negative answer, mind you.
"Why don't you tell me? You're the one with the psychic abilities.
Well Masen, you win some, you lose some. She's got you there, sucker. You opened that bag of worms all by yourself. This REALLY wasn't going at all like I'd planned. I was afraid to open my mouth at this point. Then she started laughing hysterically, and I gave up, just staring at her intently.
.Fuck?
"Shit Bella, why do you do that to me?" I asked her, a little – no strike that, a lot - confused. What was she laughing at?
"Do what?" she asked. "I'm just being me, Edward.
I kept my mouth shut, waiting for her to continue.
"Look, I'm sorry, but one day you bring me Perrier or take me out to lunch, and the next you're making fun of me. It's like being friends with Sybil!"
"I don't make fun of you!" I argued, clearly confused. Maybe this chick was just too smart for me. Or crazy? Too crazy for me?
"You do so!
"I do not!"
"Are we seriously going to argue like four-year-olds? It doesn't matter. I'm on to you," She stated, like she'd won whatever fight she'd started, fought, and ended while I stood there confused as hell.
"I didn't mean to make fun of you. I just didn't like hearing that you were going out with Jake again."
"I don't know why you're so protective. Do I seem that vulnerable?" She rolled her eyes and to be honest, I was a little turned on.
"I was jealous." I said quietly, almost hoping she hadn't heard me.
"Wait, I'm sorry, it sounded like you said you were jealous," she laughed.
Suddenly a light went on in her eyes. I breathed a sigh of relief. She knew. She knew I wanted to ask her out. This might be easier than I thought.
"Oh my God, you're gay!" She screamed, loud enough so the dudes out surfing in the Pacific a half a mile away all stopped what they were doing and turned around. "I should have known! Edward, I'm so sorry I didn't see it before. I didn't mean to steal your man. No wonder you got so mad at me. Jake, well, it's pretty clear he's straight, but I can totally help you find a boyfriend. I'm a good wingman, er, wingwoman. I don't know all the gay hotspots, but I can ask around or Google it or something. Wait! My hairdresser is gay! Maybe he can…"
I couldn't stop her if I tried. I was mortified. For her. For me. For the Surfers.
"What the Hell are you talking about? I'm not gay! I want you! Not that Jake asshole! You!"
Like ten minutes went by with silence as thick as the oppressive heat. She seemed to be lost inside her head. I may as well not have been there.
Suddenly she looked up with a smile and grabbed my thumb. Yes weird, but she was an odd duck. Nonetheless, there was a definite tingle.
***************************************TPR**************************************
I knew this week would drag by. I was so excited that she seemed to like the Getty museum idea because I'd been nervous that maybe museums weren't her thing. I didn't mention the gardens because she'd never been there, so I wanted it to be a surprise. I needed a few tricks up my sleeve. The plan was that she would come here early Saturday afternoon and then we'd drive over to the museum together. We would, of course, take my truck. There was no way I was riding in that contraption. I had an image to uphold.
And drag by it did. I almost wished I had asked her on Friday so I wouldn't have had to wait five days. Of course, I saw her every day and always brought her water. But I also tried to keep busy. I had lunch with Esme, lunch with Carlisle, and went over to Emmett's every afternoon to take Lily out for a walk on the pier. I usually went out at night and had a beer or two.
I was propositioned more this week than ever before. I think it had to do with my nonchalance.
In the mornings, I ran on the beach. Thursday, I took a ride to Norman's and looked around. I hoped that one day I could take Bella there. I didn't know if she liked music or instruments and would have to remember to ask her. Girls liked when you asked them things.
Friday night I went over to Emmett's house for dinner. He was giving me advice while Rosalie tried to counter everything he said.
"So, should I get her flowers?"
"I wouldn't bring her anything. She might think you're trying to buy her love or expect something in return," Emmett said in a very serious voice.
"What time are you picking her up?" Rosalie asked as she dished out salad.
"I'm not. It doesn't make any sense for me to go into Studio City to pick her up and then come back out to Malibu to go to the Museum." I suddenly felt bad for not offering to pick her up. I sucked at this dating gig.
"You should run out and get her some tea or coffee before she gets there, and maybe some pastries." Rosalie offered.
"Pastries? What are we, French now?" Emmett argued.
"He's not picking her up. The least he can do is get her some breakfast."
They were talking about me like I wasn't even there.
"Won't she have already eaten by eleven? I mean I guess I could run to Coffee Bean. I think they have pastries. If not, they definitely have croissants, right?" I was more confused than ever. What constituted a pastry? Could I just get her a bagel? It would be really close to lunchtime. Maybe we could grab lunch at the museum. If I offered her a bagel, she wouldn't be hungry for lunch. Maybe I should just stick with coffee.
"You should just be yourself, E. I can tell how nervous you are and my advice would be to stay calm and cool. She's already agreed to go out with you, so she must already like you at least a little bit."
That night I practiced talking to myself in the mirror. I hadn't done this since I was a little kid. The "something different" about Bella made me want to impress. I'd been an asshole for so many years, and I wanted to make sure that guy didn't show up on our date. She wouldn't put up with it for a second. Be Myself. My former self was not a nice person so I had to be better than myself. .
After my exercise in embarrassment, I called Alice and she gave me another pep talk, telling me how great I was and how much I had to offer. She thought the coffee and bagel was a good idea. I told her I loved her and went to sleep. It was after midnight and I wanted to get up early and make sure I had time to get everything I needed to get done before she arrived.
********************************TPR**************************************************
I was running really late the next morning. My fuckin' alarm didn't go off. Fuckin cheap-ass iPhone. By the time I was showered and shaved, it was already 10:15. I ran to the Coffee Bean at the Malibu Country Mart and waited on a long-ass line. How many effing people go out on a Saturday morning and buy coffee? Oh yeah, I usually woke up at noon. It probably looked like this every Saturday morning. Bella was already having a positive effect on me! I was actually up when normal people were. Though the having to wait part sucked.
It was 10:40 by the time I was walking out with my drinks. Please don't be early. Please don't be early. I repeated like a mantra as I was driving down PCH. For the first time, I think maybe in my entire life, I did not sit in traffic. I made it home in ten minutes. As I pulled in, Red truck pulled in behind me.
She looked so damn cute, wearing a pink tank top and these white short pants that went to her knees. She had her hair down and I always loved that.
"Hi" She said quietly and blushed.
"Hi." I bent down and kissed her on the cheek. She smelled like a combination of vanilla, cocoa butter and Dove. She blushed even more after that. "Thanks for coming today Bella. It means a lot to me that you're giving me a chance." Oh yes, I was really laying it on thick and pulling out all the stops. I went around and opened the door of my truck for her and helped her step up, trying to keep my hand away from her ass.
"You got me coffee?" she asked with a huge smile on her face.
"Yeah, I felt bad that I didn't pick you up so I thought I would try to make up for it. I didn't know what you took in it so I got you some cream and different kinds of sugar." I handed her the bag. She was just staring at me. She looked happy, but there was something else behind her eyes. Then she seemed to shake it off.
"That was so thoughtful, Edward." She leaned over the console and kissed me on the cheek.
This was going very well.
************************************TPR****************************************
We had a lot of fun walking around the museum. I was never much of an art fanatic but I had always loved walking around the Getty with my Mom because I knew she enjoyed it so much, and it was the same with Bella. I was having a good time because I saw how happy she was. While it was a little tense in the beginning, we finally settled into casual conversations about the paintings.
I made her laugh a lot by saying that half the sculptures looked like porn and wondered if it was really to scale. I'll admit that I did try to impress her with some of my knowledge of the paintings. Hey, she'd gone a long time thinking I was some jerky rich kid who didn't have a brain in his head. I guess it mattered what she thought of me.
I loved watching her while she studied each painting. One time, she caught me looking at her. We were in front of L'entrée de Jardin Turc. It was one of Esme's favorites and we always talked about it. I could see her taking it in. She was so pretty. Her face was unique. She didn't wear a lot of makeup and she didn't need it. She had light freckles over her nose and cheeks, and big round eyes. I was still angry my father had said she would blend into the woodwork. It obviously made her feel bad and couldn't have been less true. He just liked…well…the type I used to go for. She turned quickly and caught me staring. I smiled and rubbed my thumb over her cheek.
"There's a garden tour that starts at 2:30. Would you like to go and then maybe we can grab something to eat on our way back?" I asked quietly.
She nodded, keeping eye contact. I grabbed her hand and we went to get on the line for the tour. The gardens were my favorite part of the museum and she seemed to enjoy them also. There was a quiet between us, not out of tension, but the beginnings of comfortability. This was all so new to me, but it felt right. I wanted to do right by this girl.
We stopped by In-N-Out on the way home and grabbed a very late lunch. It was so nice today, and I suggested we bring it back to my house and eat on the back deck. There was a cool wind blowing off the Pacific and we lied on our respective lounges and dug in, talking about everything under the sun. After we finished eating, I held her hand. It was so strange that this was enough for right now. The old me would have just been itching to jump on over to her lounge and start macking on her. I didn't feel anxious at all. Her hand was soft and warm and I was content.
The only topic we wisely stayed away from was Carlisle and the fact that she worked for him. I learned all about what she loved. I had never really listened to what a girl was saying before. There was no need to, since I knew it wouldn't last until the next morning. Bella was quirky and funny. We talked for hours and I wasn't bored once. When the sun started to set, I suggested she hit the road. To be honest, I didn't want the night to end, but there was no way I was asking her to stay over.
When we got to her truck, I took a deep breath and said, "There's a great brunch place about ten minutes from here. It has a great view of the ocean and the food is amazing. Would you want to…I mean I know it's a long drive...but would you feel like coming back out in the morning and going to b-brunch with me?" Jesus. Now I had developed a stutter.
"I would love to" She said. Again blushing. I wanted to kiss her. Should I?
I leaned down to kiss her on the cheek. Unexpectedly, she turned and we were kissing. She tasted unbelievable. A mixture of diet coke, french fries, and mint. The kiss became heated and it was everything I could do not to press her against big red truck and tear her clothes off. I somehow got the feeling I was going to need to go slowly with this girl, and pulled away, but holy fuck, I could seriously taste this girl all night. She didn't seem too eager to leave either. I finally lifted her into her truck and closed her door. She leaned her head out the window.
"Thank you, Edward. I had an amazing time tonight. It was perfect."
I beamed like a lovesick fool. "I'm glad. I wanted to make it perfect for you. Goodbye, Bella. See you tomorrow. Eleven again?"
She nodded and pulled away. I definitely needed to process what was happening.
I sat outside for a while and drank a beer. After being okay with being alone for so long, since finding out what having companionship was like, I felt a little lonely. I really liked this girl. She wasn't typical, that was for sure. But that felt right. I just knew I had to go slow. Not that I was an expert in dating, but she gave off that vibe. Like she could be innocent. She couldn't possibly be a virgin, but she obviously didn't have as much experience as the women I'd been with in the past.
She was right on time the next morning, and again looked so fuckin' cute. I came outside as she was getting out of her truck. She walked right into my arms and stood on her toes to give me a quick kiss.
"We should get to the restaurant before I have you for brunch," I said.
Geoffrey's was high on a cliff in Malibu. I had made sure to call ahead and get a table outside. The day was a little overcast, but we still had a great view. I was starving, having not eaten anything since the In-n-out the previous day. We ordered oysters, mimosas, scotch Benedict, and lobster quiche. Bella loved food. She loved to eat. And I loved to watch her. I could hear her little moans and wondered if that was what she would sound like when we would finally have sex, but I tried to get that out of my head, since I'd agreed with myself to take it slowly with her. Old me. Old me. I couldn't remind myself enough.
We finally left, completely stuffed. As we pulled into my driveway, I squeezed her hand. She was gazing out the window looking very happy. The sky was starting to darken, and I knew we had about a minute to get inside...
"Let's go inside so I can get you some water. It's going to rain any second."
She gave me a weak smile. I ran around to her side and helped her down from the truck. We ran holding hands into the alcove of my doorway as the rain started to come down. I smiled down at her and kissed her. Soon the kiss got out-of-hand. I opened the door behind me while still kissing her and fell into the house. I lifted her up and she wrapped her legs around my waist. We ended up collapsing together on the couch. I rearranged her so she was on top of me. My breathing picked up as I leaned in and kissed her soundly.
There was no resistance. She ran her fingers through my hair and I groaned loudly against her mouth. I loved when chicks ran their hands through my hair. I didn't know where to put my hands, so I ran them up the back of her t-shirt. And then under. Her skin was smooth and soft. She jumped a little, and it was then I remembered that she wasn't like the other girls I'd been with, and I wanted to do right by her.
"Bella, we should stop…" Yep. I couldn't believe those words came out of my mouth. "I really want to keep going, but you have to tell me what you want. I don't want to assume anything."
"I'm sorry, Edward. I know you're used to girls who are more experienced. I hope you don't mind guiding me. I've never…you know…done that."
My heart stopped. I mean I knew she was inexperienced, but a virgin? I had never been with a virgin. Not even when I lost mine.
"Please say something."
She looked terrified. I guess she was waiting for some kind of response. Here we were, lying on my couch, with her on top of me. I was hard like a steel rod. If she were any other girl, I would have picked her up and taken her to my bedroom, spending the whole day making her scream. But this was Bella, and she was a virgin. I would have to take this even slower than I originally thought, because even though losing my own virginity didn't mean much, I wanted her to have a good experience. Bella was good.
"I think we should take it slow. Your first time should be a special experience for you, and I don't want you to feel pressured into doing anything." She looked like I had just drop-kicked her puppy. I gazed up into her eyes. "I swear, I'm not turned off by what you just said."
To prove it, I kissed her slowly, reaching up under her shirt and palming her breast. We kissed for as long as I thought my self-control would allow, and I realized I'd reached my breaking point...
"Bella, we should definitely stop while I can still control myself."
Again, words never uttered out of this mouth before.
"Listen, why don't you pick out a movie while I go use the bathroom?" I knew I had to get rid of my little – or not so little - problem. I kissed her again and jumped up. "I'll get us some drinks too."
She looked a little shocked, I guess by how fast I'd gotten up, but then she smiled.
"Thanks. That would be great."
By now it was storming. We rarely had thunderstorms on the coast and it was awesome to see the lightning light up the sky over the Pacific.
When I came back from the bathroom with two bottles of Perrier, she had put on "Say Anything" which was playing on TBS. Total chick flick, but it was ok. I could identify with Lloyd – grand gestures and all! All guys could learn something from Lloyd.
She smiled shyly at me and said it was one of her favorite movies. We cuddled on the couch for the rest of the afternoon and for the first time in a long time, I didn't feel lonely. I felt content. Like nothing was missing.
A Huge thanks to Tropical Sorbet for her shout outs on Twitter. If you are not reading Edroar the Angry Lion you are seriously missing out. I haven't laughed so hard in a long time! No Seriously. Go read this right now!
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Super Angsty and hard to read but at the same time, beautifully written and you just want to give Mute Bella a hug.
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In Too Deep by EdwardsBloodType
I know you all know this author! In Too Deep is so great and I know it already has thousands of reviews but for those that have not started it, it is just as great as High Anxiety (which has a great epilogue by the way! Check it out!), This is a great Italian Edward from Long Island. You have to read this…
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