Episode 10

The morning after Gengar left.

Phoebe: "Cmon Cj aren't you going to get up yet?"

Me: "What, why, I'm still tired, what time is it?"

Phoebe: "Its 11:00am."

Me:"Dam, I'm still tired."

Phoebe: "Well get up already, I've been awake since 10:00 and I've just been sitting here waiting for you to get up so we can get going."

I sat up, and rubbed my eyes.

Me: "Ok ok, why are you so pushy all of a sudden?"

I started the engine, and pulled back onto the highway.

Phoebe: "So what did Gengar say last night?"

Me:" He said alot of things, he told me how the pokemon world existed way before the games were created, and lots of other things."

Phoebe: "If you don't want to talk you know I can just read your thoughts."

Me: "Its probly better if you did it that way, cause I'm tired and its hard for me to remember everything he said, It took him 3 hours to finish talking about it you know?"

Phoebe: "Yeah, I know, you woke me up when you were finished."

Me: "Well if somebody didn't lock the door, I wouldn't of had to wake them up now would I?"

Phoebe: "Well I was scared ok, I meen it was gengar, and after that incident with that darkrai."

Me: "I understand."

Me:"By the way just go ahead and read my thoughts, I can't even concetrate right now I'm so tired, and its really hard to try to remember things someone told me at 3:00AM, whilst trying to keep a 5000lb vehicle on the road with rougly 1000lb extra pounds of weaponry and supplies."

Phoebe: "Ok if you ."

Her smile quickly turned into a frown.

Me: "Whats wrong?"

Phoebe: "I'm a copy, I'm not the... real...thing, oh but I have a soul though I am not identical to all the other gardevoirs out there, I can live with that."

Me: "Stop reading honey I just remembered something I don't think you should know."

Phoebe: "What!?"

Me: "You just saw that part didn't you?"

Phoebe: "I was born in a computer world, out of data copied from the originals in the actual pokemon world, and my actions in said world, are ultimately responsible for the disasters in this world."

Me: "Yeah, thats the part I was refering too."

Phoebe: "Cj, pull over."

I pulled started to cry, I couldn't blame her, I couldn't stop her.

Phoebe: "I killed all those people Cj,not Gengar, not darkrai, it was me, all along."

I wanted to cry too, I was begining to wonder if my soul was cursed or something.

Me: "No, it wasn't your fault, you didn't know,I didn't know, nobody knew."

Me: "Besides, haven't we been over this before?"

Me: "You said, that sometimes, the world just works in that way."

Me: "Its not your fault, its just, crap happens sometimes."

Phoebe: "But I broke the rules."

Me: "Screw the rules for keeping us apart, they should of known better then to mess with us."

Phoebe: "What,Cj that doesn't make any sense."

Me: "I needed you, and they were in the way, its all my fault ok, for allowing myself to succumb to what little humanity I had left, its my fault for desiring you, for giving you a reason to break the code, Its all my fault ok, I should of just accepted my fate and let myself starve to death, cause that seemed pretty much exactly what god wanted me to do, I was too insatiable, normal life wasn't good enough for me,there was never a single damned girl in my life, even though hes the one that made my soul like this, i can't blame him, because hes supposed to be perfect, which can only meen that somewhere somehow along the line, I FUCKED up, and now here we go again, he just can't let it go, so the second he allowed me to have you, he screwed up the rest of the world, just to prove, that I was wrong, just for wanting to keep myself alive, just for wanting to hold on to the few shreds of sanity I had left, just because I wanted to wait for his commands, which he never I didn't have the confidence to do anything on my own, I was too fucking shy and my soul was too fucking tired to do anything about this."

I was on the line, cracking at the seams, not sure whether to believe my own words or not, I just wanted her to stop crying, because it was her pain, that was hurting me.

Phoebe: "Cj, stop it, your scaring me!"

Me:"I'm sorry, I'm sorry baby, I never wanted to see you in so much pain..."

Phoebe: "You had nothing to do with this, it was my choice, I'm the one thats ultimately responsible."

Me: "Don't let it get to you, please, we're going to make this right, if it takes the rest of our lives, we're going to fix this, and we're going to fix it together, now stop crying, before you ruin whatever is left of me."

Phoebe: "Cj,I'm sorry, I can't take this anymore I'm going to end this, I love you baby."

Her hands glowed in a slight purple tinge, I knew she was trying to kill us both.I hugged her, I couldn't think of anything else to do.

Me: "Don't do it baby, its not over yet, its not over."

-crying- Phoebe: "I'm sorry Cj, this didn't turn out the way I thought it would."

Me: "Its not over, you've only seen the first page, we can still fix this,screw the rest of the world, we're together, thats all that matters now, we can still make this right, don't give up, not now, I've wanted to give up before, several times, and every single time, I said to myself, it could all change tomarrow,it would be a shame if I were just to give up now when what I want could just be around the corner, even though it never was, and thats what kept me alive, it didn't keep my soul from rotting out, but it kept me alive dammit, and now, I finally have you, and everything else just faded away."

She pushed me away and stepped outside.

-crying- Phoebe: "I'm sorry...sob...I'm in so much pain...goodbye...you'll find another gardevoir...I'm just a copy after all."

Me: "Your not a copy, your are mine, you were my pokemon, no one elses, and then you became my wife, no ones elses, you were the best thing that ever fucking happened to me,19 years of total fucking hell, and you were all I got out of it,and it took for fucking ever just to get you, and I never even thought, that I could have you, I never even thought that it was even fucking possible,but then you came, and that was the best night of my life, and then the world went through the same hell I went through my entire fucking life, sure some of it was my own fault, but it always seemed like I was getting punished harder then anyone else, I could care less about what the world thinks of us, they always thought I was crap throughout my life, so what the fuck is the difference, I have you, and you were all I ever wanted, but now, you think you fucked up, the world?, The world was always fucked up honey, fucked up so bad, that people like me never had a single fucking chance, and then you came along, you gave me that chance,you brought our worlds together, just to give me that chance, that no one else, not even god himself seemed willing to give me, and now just cause you had to throw this world into chaos, even though you had no idea it was your fault until now, you just want to quit, you just want to leave me here, when you know damn well I can't live without you, your not going to make anything right like that, it's not going to undo, whats already been done, your just gonna kill yourself, and then your gonna kill me in the process, when there is plenty of time, plenty of chances out there, to redeem ourselves, so seriously, suck it up buttercup, cause were in this together, and there's no way out of this."

Me: "And we're still not entirely sure its your fault anyway, That hole always existed, you just found it, but what originally created it?"

-crying- Phoebe: "Cj...I'm sorry, help me."

Me: "Get back in the truck baby,lets go, pretend this never happened."

To my relief, she did get back in.

Me: "Are you going to be ok,now?"

-crying- Phoebe: "I don't know."

-crying- Phoebe: "I'm sorry...I thought you wanted it to be over as well."

Me: "No, what the fuck ever made you think that."

Me: "Never do that again, ever."

-crying- Phoebe: "I won't...I promise."

Me:"Ok, its all over now, good,we can finally get going."

So we took off, down that highway, towards Danville.

Me: "I just want to forget this ever happened, ok, you with me on that?"

Me: "Hey I'm talking to you, do you even love me, or is this some kind of game to you?"

Phoebe: "What, of course I love you."

Me: "Good, cause when you threaten to kill yourself like that, thats a pretty damn good sign that you care more about your own pain, then anyone else's."

Phoebe: "Cj, I lost it for a few seconds ok?, that does not meen, that I stopped loving you, it just meens that I wasn't thinking straight ok, calm down baby."

Me: "Ok...fine I'll believe you, if only because, I want to forget this incident ever happened."

Phoebe: "Neither of us slept well last night, it impaired our judgement, we both lost it, it's ok, it's over now, its back to normal, well as normal as a human marrying a gardevoir anyway."

Me:"What, you think theres something wrong with that honey,it was your idea to start this relationship it was your idea to get married and remember, it was also your idea to have sex, so seriously..."

Phoebe: "Cj, calm down, your starting to scare me again, theres nothing wrong with our marriage, its just unusual thats all."

Me: "It's just, sometimes I wonder if you really love me, you know I love you because you can read my mind, but I have no Idea if what your thinking sometimes, like that first day in Lycomming."

Me: "Phoebe, I love you I need you, but do love me as much?"

Phoebe: "I love you,but sometimes, all this death and destruction, its hard for me to deal with, especially since I may be the one responsible for it."

Me: "But I'm the one that asked you to come here, so in a way we're both responsible, and that doesn't really answer my question."

Phoebe: "Lets pull over ok, theres a rest stop up here."

She was right, up ahead there was finally a rest stop, the one we would've found last night if Gengar didn't show up.I pulled over and shut the engine off.

Me:"Phoebe, neither of us knew what the consequences would be, we're still innocent, sure this destruction, death, all of it, is total crap, but we still have eachother, we still have something to fight for, but only if your willing to put as much in this as I am."

Phoebe: "I love you Cj."

She kissed me.

Me: "How do I know your not just saying that?"

Phoebe: "You want me to prove it, fine."

Phoebe: "Get out Cj,I want to show you."

So we both got out of my truck.

Phoebe: "Now come here, hold me."

Me: "Your not going to try to kill us again are you?"

Phoebe: "No, I promised I'd never do that again."

So we put our arms around eachother, and somehow she linked our minds, she showed me how much she loved me, in the few seconds we were in eachother's arms.

Me: "I'm so sorry honey, I love you."

Phoebe: "And now that you know that I love you..."

Our passion for eachother went through the roof at that point, and we ended up having sex right there. We had sex all around the reststop. That incident stressed us out, we felt better afterwards. It was obvious that we were close, that she really did love me, and that their was still something right in the world, among all the chaos and were reminded that we were still right, that this was still working, that as long as we were together, the rest of the world, could literally, turn to hell.

Me: "You'll always be the light to my darkness baby, never forget that."

Me: "Lets just keep moving on, keep fighting until all this is over, and then, we can relax, maybe we'll head over to miami I don't know they have nice beaches there."

Phoebe: "You told me Miami was destroyed?"

Me: "We can fix it, right?"

Phoebe: "I don't think we can so much as fix it as stopping what ever destroyed it."

Me: "doesn't matter, theres got to be some nice place left in this world, and when this is over were going to find it, and it will just be you and me together, for the rest of our lives."

Phoebe: "Thats nice Cj, but we got alot of stuff to do first."

Me: "You meen alot of things to kill."

Phoebe: "Not neccesarily darling."

Phoebe: "And thats only if we don't get killed ourselves."

A bit of irony was in what I said next, normally I'm not much of an optimist.

Me: "What do you meen if we don't get killed, were not gonna die anytime soon, before I met you, I took on half of hell, and won, and now I have you, and the other half just decided to join the party, what I'm saying is, by the time were're done, we're gonna own these kid in Danville has no chance against us."

Phoebe: "Why'd you have to say it like that?"

Me: "Sorry baby, I just like to sound dramatic sometimes."

Phoebe: "I can tell...your really good at it, almost as good as you are at..."

Phoebe: "[filtered content alert]."

Me:"Shh, don't tell them that, we still gotta keep this at an M rating."

Phoebe: "Oh, sorry."

Me: "Then again, I put the first and second times we had sex on here."

Phoebe: "What!"

Me: "Don't worry, its not like I put up pictures or anything."

Phoebe: "Do you even have any pictures?"

Me: "No."

Phoebe: "Oh..ok..good."