They were on a boat slowly drifting towards an island on which a large castle was erected. « What is this place, Amélie?
- Château Guillard. This is where I grew up in.
- It is an impressive building.
- My father owned it and I was supposed to inherit it with my husband after he and my mother had passed away.
- And how do you feel about this place? Does it bring memories back? »
Amélie stared into the castle's windows, trying to remember whatever was left in the dept of her mind. « I don't feel much.
- How so?
- It's as if there was a gapping hole between me and those memories. I can't feel anything about them.
- Does it have to do with your time spent at Talon?
- Yes, it does.
- Then we will have to discuss about it. »
They landed on the island and entered the castle. It seemed to have been abandoned. « What happened here? Amélie asked more to herself than anyone else.
- It seems like this place is no longer habitable.
- Why would my parents leave it to crumble like that? I'm sure someone would've restored it by now. »
She tried to remember anything she could about her parents. « Sombra mentioned that my father was dead… did my mother share the same fate?
- It is clear that no soul lives in this place. They may have moved out of it.
- No, it was our family's ancestral home. There's no way around it. They must be dead and no one took care of the place because there was no one to inherit it. »
She walked through the castle followed by Zenyatta slowly hovering behind her. The place had accumulated dust for a while and there were sings that it had been under reconstruction. Some widows were broken, vines and moss had started growing on the roof and over the walls.
As she went through the castle, she became frustrated by her lack of feelings. She grew up here, she spent more than twenty years in between those walls… why couldn't she just feel nostalgia like others would've?
She went on the top floor and onto what used to be her room. The bed was still intact although most of her personal belonging had been removed. Only some pictures remained on the walls, pictures of when she was much younger.
« Tell me about your childhood, Amélie, Zenyatta asked as he looked at them.
- I was always a quiet child. I never really went outside since I was homeschooled. Although I didn't had much friends, I wanted to meet new people, see the world. My parents never really let me do those things and so I spent most of my time in my room, on my computer. »
She noticed one of the picture showing her in a costume she used to wear when she danced. « I might have been fourteen or so when I started ballet. When my mom heard I liked dancing, she brought in a teacher for me. I was a quick learner and I made it into her troop really young. My parents were so proud of me. I started dancing around the country when I became eighteen and my career had started. Even after that, I was still my parent's little girl. They would bring me to all their family reunion and all of their meeting. I could tell they were happy to show me around, to let the world know their only child was a renowned dancer.
- And how did you feel about this?
- It was the only thing I knew about. I was just happy to know I could do something I like with my life. But, sometime, I felt like I was a trophy for my parents. Their best achievement in life. Their success in flesh. »
She stared at the pictures, this time, she could see through them and into the past. She never liked family reunions. Those people never felt like family to her. She was born in a peculiar time that made her too old to be with all the younger members of the family, but also too young to be with the adults. « When was the last time you danced? » Zenyatta asked.
She sighted at the thought. « It was… at Talon's headquarter.
- Tell me, please.
- I was in the middle of my training. I had a bad day and I felt bad inside. They were just starting to lower down my temperature and my heart rate. During the night, I just let my instinct flow and I started practicing my movements I used to do every day. I remember the feeling : my heart pumping faster, closing my eyes and remembering so many things. When I realized what was happening, I stopped. I was told not to remember those things, and I was too afraid to try. That night, I went to tell Gabriel what I had done and… »
She sighted. « I don't want to talk about it anymore.
- It is important to remember those things, Amélie. They are just as much a part of you than the rest of your being.
- You start to sound like a bad memory of mine.
- How so?
- You sound like the angel in my dreams.
- The angel?
- I've been dreaming about it and what he told me has been into my mind for several days already.
- Please, tell me about it Amélie. »
She sat down on the bed. « It is half human and half machine, with many arms and a single eye instead of a head.
- A single eye?
- Yes, it is large, blue and beautiful.
- And what did it tell you?
- Horrible things. It first told me that I was a monster. A cold, lifeless murderer. It told me that I deserved to die and that I should've died when I hit the wall, that the world would never forgive me and never forget who I was.
- And did you believe all of those things?
- How could I not believe it? I was stuck between life and death, with nightmares of me murdering people. »
She saw Zenyatta slowly levitate towards her and take her hands. « Amélie, what you saw is known as the Iris.
- The Iris?
- Yes. Many Omnics, including me, have seen it.
- But I'm not an Omnic, I'm only human.
- I once saw a young human dream of the Iris as well. He said he felt it when he was on the verge of dying, when Doctor Ziegler was operating him and turning him into a cyborg.
- But I'm not a cyborg either.
- You have cybernetic enhancement. Doctor Ziegler told me about it, Amélie. You have machines in your brain to help you stay with us, you have mechanical eyes to see in the dark and your bones are reinforced with machinery to make you stronger. Those parts affect your mind just as much as the rest of your body. »
She remembered what she first saw when she woke up from her first dream with the angel : the many machines that were connected to her. « But… why would I dream of the Iris? What did I do to deserve it?
- The Iris comes for all of us, Amélie. It is not a real being.
- It said that it was me.
- Because it is.
- How so?
- The Iris is not real, it is your own unconscious mind talking to you. The Iris is different for everyone, it tells us the deep truth rooted within us and it shows us how we truly see the world.
- So all the things it told me… it is the way I see myself?
- Yes, Amélie. »
She thought of the conversation they had. She hated herself so much for everything she had done that her own consciousness hated her and insulted her. « But what causes it to exist?
- I have been looking for that answer for twenty years, now, Amélie. The first time I saw the Iris, I awakened and started my journey. It took me a very long time to realize that the Iris was not a deity, or that it's teaching came from our reflections of ourselves.
- But why would it only affect Omnics and those who are part machine? I never heard of humans talking about the Iris.
- It may be the one thing that gives Omnic their consciousness. One thing is certain, the Iris has great influence on our conscious behaviour once it starts to show itself.
- I saw an Omnic speak the words of the angel to me before he tried to kill Doctor Ziegler. After I shot him, all the other Omnics started attacking everyone and their lights turned to the same blue as the angel's eye. If it is only part of my unconscious, how can it control others?
- The Iris still has many mysteries that we need to solve. I have never heard of it controlling people in this way.
- Maybe it is angry at me? Maybe it wants to kill me because of all the things I've done. »
Zenyatta remained silent, looking like he was meditating on something. « I once dreamt something awful, Amélie. I think it is best you know it.
- What is it?
- When I first heard of the death of Mondatta, I was really sad. When I went to sleep on that night, I dreamt of killing you, Amélie.
- You knew it was me?
- I dreamt I killed the woman we then knew as Widowmaker. When I woke up, I confessed it to my fellow brothers from Nepal, and they told me they dreamt the same thing. Some of them wanted to hunt you down, leave the mountains to find you and kill you, but I knew it was the Iris showing us our unconscious anger. I meditate more than ever on that day, and it was then that I realize what my true purpose was.
- And what was it?
- We needed to spread the true meaning of the Iris and connect with the individuals instead of the ways of Mondatta. My journey started because of you, Amélie.
- Really?
- Thanks to you, I saved the young Genji Shimada's life and found my true purpose. That is what the Iris must be used for, not to listen blindly and recreate what it tells us.
- So what must I do?
- We will listen to what the Iris tells you and meditate on it. There is still much to learn. »
They spent most of their first day cleaning the room and the parts of the castle they needed. « Does Angela know where I am? she asked.
- Yes. She will send you news of her situation and supplies that you may want to use.
- And how long will we… meditate?
- As long as we need to understand.
- And… how long is that usually?
- I have been looking for answers for twenty years and I still have not found what I have been looking for.
- I'd prefer not spending the rest of my life alone in and abandoned thinking about life.
- You are not alone.
- It's a manner of speaking.
- I understand you have a role to play in the upcoming conflicts. We will try and spend as less time as possible, but you will have to open your mind.
- I think I am ready.
- Then so be it, Amélie. Now, the day is almost over. Sleep is the best medicine to the mind. Do not forget what I told you about the Iris.
- I wont. »
As they went to sleep, Amélie got into the bed and noticed Zenyatta sitting in the corner of the room with his metallic sphere slowly spinning. « Aren't you going to sleep as well?
- I always empty my mind before going to rest, Amélie. It is a habit that has helped me find peace even in my darkest time. »
She nodded and went to sleep in her old bed. She never though she'd be back in this place, let alone in her old room. The slow melody coming from the orbs helped her clear her mind and fall asleep.