Watsoncat belongs to TheCapitainsideways and the tumbleverse. Enter if you dare! Please, please, please, please,please don't do what you are about to read here to your friends or your cat. Or your friend's cat. Or your cat's friend. It is NOT COOL!
Lestrade turned to run down the wrong road, taking the traditional route that he knew home, but I showed him a shortcut. He appeared somewhat frenzied and his decision making skills were duller than usual, so I took advantage by teaching him a bit of the London street ways.
It took much longer than anticipated to run from King's cross to Lestrade's house on the complete opposite side of the city. The traffic was thick, and moving just fast enough to make crossing streets hazardous. Several times I had to stop Lestrade from barreling head first into small openings in traffic that would close in a flash, spelling doom for any cat foolish enough to risk fate. I have much to say about the Yarders, but you will never find me declaiming them for lack of bravery.
Watsoncat edit: Is it just me or is he becoming needlessly dramatic? Tell me I'm not the only one who sees it?
According to a sign outside of a bank, it was two twenty-three before we even got close to Lestrade's home. We were still a long way off, but we were also winded and exhausted. Sprinting across cities, any cities, is generally tiring.
"If my wife is…huff…is…huff…I'll never forgive…huff." Lestrade for all of his passion and bravado was a bit out of shape and could not even stop panting long enough to swear an oath against our mysterious antagonist.
And who was this antagonist? The cat who not only knew that Detective Inspector Lestrade would be with us at the train station, but actually plotted to pull us as far away so that he could have free reign of his house. And if his ultimate goal was Lestrade, then why begin by warning me directly? There was more to the plot than the three of us could even possibly imagine.
Speaking of Adlercat, I'd been trying to lose her for a few blocks after the train station, but she was more than adept at keeping up with us.
By three-oh-clock we had finally arrived at Lestrade's house only to find the cat-door that he was used to entering and exiting from blocked by some heavy object. He shoved at the flap in vain and bashed his forehead against its immobile plastic.
I had no patience for his endeavors, so I simply found a window close to the ground and opened it.
Lestrade came as close to flying as I think I've ever seen him as he jumped from his door stoop straight through the window. He doesn't even realize what a feat it was.
Inside his house, all was quiet save for the humming of appliances. Even I was unnerved glancing into the shadows, expecting at any time to be accosted by our mysterious killer.
"The fish tank!" Adlercat cried and we spun around.
In one corner of the room a massive cube of glass housed almost one dozen brightly colored tropical fish that hovered like ghosts, and glowed blue from some sort of fish-light in the tank. At the bottom of the tank, nestled among the fake plants and pointlessly colored rocks lay a small white cat whose eyes were closed in the perfect countenance of peace.
"Oh Christ, she's dead." Lestrade wailed.
I, of course required a closer look. Lestrade failed to notice to apparent heavy rocks floating just above his wife's head (Though how is completely beyond me) he also failed to notice that though she was currently underwater her fur was not wet and a slight movement every few seconds indicated she was still breathing air.
"She's not dead." I said finally. "She's trapped. In a smaller glass tank held down by those rocks."
No sooner had I said this than Lestrade dove into the water with complete reckless regard for his life or that of his wife and began knocking rocks off the top of the smaller tank.
I, to my great dismay, had to dive in after him and kick him to earn his attention. He spewed bubbles and resurfaced sputtering out water and curses which I had no patience for.
"Listen!" I shouted "I'll remove the rocks; you get your wife to the surface as fast as possible. Don't let her breath the water, do you understand?"
He bobbed his head in understanding and ducked beneath the surface, gasping one huge breath of air without saying another word.
He floated down to the very bottom, kicking furiously to fight his natural buoyancy while I pushed the stones with my paws. They toppled over with the slightest jarring and in no time the tank began to lift and water rushed over his wife.
In a flash Lestrade had grabbed her and had kicked off the bottom of the tank shooting through the water like a missile. By the time I had resurfaced he was already gingerly lifting his wife out of the water. We gently laid her out on the floor and Lestrade began to really freak out. He couldn't sit still (though he tried a few times) and he ambled around his wife asking questions and nudging her with his nose.
"What's wrong with her?" he asked choking on a sob.
She was for the most part, none the worse for wear. Lestrade had been fast, so she shouldn't have much water in her lungs but she was still snoozing peacefully. Even being wet hadn't stimulated her.
"She'll probably be fine." I assured him.
He bent over her and tenderly began licking her dry. I was almost compelled to tell him that she was seeing another cat, but I heard Watsoncat's voice in my head warning me about timing.
I also had more important things to attend to, such as the note in orange crayon slipped into his wife's collar.
Adlercat removed it and straightened it out, and though it had smeared slightly it was still readable:
"Two left.
It's time for all good kitties to go home.
No time limit on this one Sherlock, just make sure you're free by 5:00."
"Home?" She asked.
"Baker Street, I'm sure." I answered. "Lestrade, stay here in case he comes back. Preserve any clues as you find him."
"Do you expect me to just sit here while you catch this creep?" he growled.
"Yes. I do."
Adlercat interjected "He could come back. You'll want to be with your wife just in case. Imagine how she'll feel if she wakes up alone."
Lestrade didn't look happy, but he looked less... like he wanted to fight.
"Catch this bastard. Find a Yarder on your way home. Tell them everything."
"Of course." I said, having no intention of doing anything of the sort.
"Let's hurry." Adlercat said.
"You're not coming."
"You can't stop me."
"I can try."
"You're wasting time."
"You're not coming." I finished. "That's all."
Suddenly we heard the opening of the door and a human voice. It was Lestrade's human home early.
"Run for it!" He commanded.
I made a beeline for the window, but I wasn't fast enough. The bumbling human shut it, unbeknownst to him that it was our only means of escape.
My next plan was to hide and I ducked beneath a table, but Adlercat wasn't so lucky.
The human swore and jumped a little while Adlercat wove in between his legs, searching manically for any means of escape. He swooped down upon her and picked her up by the scruff.
"Geez!" He exclaimed as she twisted and contorted trying to free herself from his grip. "Stray cats, stray cats! George, is this a friend of yours? George?"
He held up Adlercat to show to Lestrade (whose first name, apparently is George) and staggered back as he beheld the mess which was once his fish tank, the unconscious kitty and the two wet cats.
"What in the name of creation?" He cried. "What happened?"
He dropped Adlercat into a nearby wicker basket and tipped it over, trapping her underneath, and he went to the aid of the sleeping cat.
"She's barely breathing! What happened?" he asked again.
"Calm down Greg." Lestrade said leaning over his wife protectively.
"We need to get to a vet, quick!" he said gasping. "My wife is going to kill me."
"Sherlock, don't you leave without me!" Adlercat warned. Frankly I had never heard a better suggestion from her. If I had a route planned I would have done just so.
She lifted the wicker basket with her paws and pushed it over with her nose and as soon as she was free she made a beeline for me.
The human saw her and we were both caught. For the moment he put aside the sleeping cat (which I should think was foolhardy) and grabbed the two of us with each hand and dragged us, ruefully from beneath the table.
I was scraped along the hardwood floor and feeling resentful to one clingy spy-cat so I reached around and tried to free myself manually by scratching the hand that was pinching me.
The human mumbled something along the lines of "I'll bet you two had something to do with this, I'll deal with you later." And we were tossed into a nearby closet.
I heard the lock click and a rush of footsteps out the front door. Then, silence.
"I think he's gone." Adlercat said. "And he might have taken Lestrade with him."
"Great. That's just great!" I exclaimed. "Can you open this door?"
"It's locked." She said plainly.
"Can't you open locked doors?" I shouted.
"I can."
"Then do it!"
To this there was silence. It was pitch black in the closet, without even enough light for a cat to see by.
"Okay… maybe I can't." she admitted softly after a few moments.
"What kind of cat-burglar are you?"
"I'm not perfect. There are lots of different types of doorknobs out there you know!" she hissed.
I sat thinking. There didn't seem to be anyway out. But there HAD to be some way out. I didn't have the option of waiting.
"Are you worried?" she asked.
"That I'm a house cat without a collar? No."
"That something bad is happening to your little side-kick."
I laughed a bit at this. I knew that Watsoncat could, for the most part, take care of himself. I was slightly worried that if this criminal had offered him something to eat he would have taken it, but otherwise I trusted his judgment. He WAS a stray once after all.
"You know, I tried to play with him the other night, but he was a bit too stuck up to share you."
"Coincidentally you wouldn't have happened to have been sending him threatening emails, would you?"
"You misjudge me. It was just the one." She purred.
I tested the door again, seeing if it would somehow show some kind of weakness that I could utilize.
"Can you really not open this door, or is this another Dominatrix thing?" I asked
"We can make it one if you want."
"I'll pass."