Chapter Ten

As soon as Jack had gotten some food into Sam...well toast and tea at least...he phoned Hammond to tell him where she was and that he thought she would be okay...eventually. Then he suggested to Sam that she talk to Janet, who could take her statement...at least as much as she remembered. Sam agreed and went to take a shower and change. Jack was glad for the opportunity to speak to Janet in private.

"Jack, how are you doing? Any pain?" Janet had gotten there in only thirty-five minutes, so Jack knew she had just left the infirmary and rushed straight to Sam's house. She was still wearing her uniform blouse and skirt covered with a white doctor's smock.

"Nah, I'm fine. Sam's the one I'm worried about," he told her.

"How is she?" She could see how worried he was, and there was a hint of anger in his eyes too. She couldn't blame him for that! The thought of how often something like this was happening right on our own planet was enough to turn her stomach.

"She's shaky, but at least she's willing to talk now. I don't think she remembers much, Doc, and I doubt that will change...even with time. Whatever that guy gave her, it really did a number on her. I've never seen her so upset. She was convinced that it was all her fault, you know?"

"Yes, that's a typical feeling of rape victims, Jack." He nodded and then pointed his chin toward the hallway where Sam was entering the family room. She came over and sat next to him on the sofa, and Jack took her hand in his free one, placing them both on his thigh. Sam let him and didn't pull away, but she sat up straight, as though ready to jump up and run away. Janet got up from the chair next to the fireplace and quietly set a small device on the coffee table.

"Sam, Jack told me a little of what you've told him. But I need for you to tell me everything you remember...or even things you felt or suspected...then or since," Janet said, pressing a button on a small tape recorder. Sam knew the drill and wasn't surprised to see it.

After Sam repeated mostly what she had told Jack, she added a few new things, like how euphoric she felt, as though floating in a cloud before everything went black. She could not include how she had thought about Jack and wanted him so desperately as the drug worked to make her brain amenable to the rape, but she intended to tell him soon. He needed to know that it was him and only him that she had wanted.

Next Janet took Sam into the bedroom to get some samples from her body. Even though Sam had bathed and it had been over thirty-six hours since the incident, Janet thought there might be something under her nails or inside her body that would help shut the books on this case. She drew a vile of blood and was ready to return to the base in forty-five minutes, but not until after she spoke to both of them.

"Sam, Jack, this is something that can best be worked out together. So I hope you will both speak freely about how this whole situation makes you feel. It is important to keep the lines of communication open, Sam," she said, patting her hand. "You've taken the first step, honey, and I'm sure you are gonna be just fine."

"You have a man who loves you...sitting right here beside you. Make sure he knows how you feel. And Jack, you're a good guy! But then I've always known that about you. I'll let myself out now," she said to the two who were now staring into each other's eyes, almost oblivious of her presence and her departure.

"Sam, I don't ever want you to shut me out like that again! Promise me!"

"I...I can't promise, Jack, but I'll try. Before this happened...I was blaming myself for leaving a child to die. Okay, I know I was just following orders, but I still don't know how I could have been so cruel and heartless! Then this happened and it made me doubt myself again, and I just wanted to hide my shame.

But I know that realistically I can only hide from my mistakes for so long; eventually I have to make a decision to either go on making them or do something different with my life." Jack sat up straight, worried about where she was going with this.

"Jack, I guess what I'm trying to say is that maybe I'm just not cut out for off-world travel." She looked down at their joined hands. He slipped his hand out of hers and reached up, cupping her chin in his hand and tilting it up so she was forced to look at him.

"That's a bunch of crap, Captain! You are one of the best qualified people I know! Just give yourself more time, honey. I'll stay here and help you work through this."

"Thank you, Jack. I believe you mean that, but I just don't feel very qualified to do much of anything right now. There is one thing I have to tell you though."

She studied his face for a few seconds before continuing. "I want you to know that when...when the alcohol was taking effect...it was you I was thinking about...you I wanted. It was like whatever was in that stuff made me crazy with desire for you! I've only felt that way once or twice before, and that was when you were actually making love to me. If I hadn't passed out, I would have probably gone back to my room...and you know... while picturing your face," she admitted, a blush rising up her neck.

"You know? Now you're sounding like Danny! He's worried about you by the way. I am sure Hammond's told him by now that I found you. I didn't tell anyone what happened, but Janet will be turning in her report to Hammond soon."

She knew that meant that several other people would be finding out about her experience, namely the base psychiatrist and her teammates. Again she thought of all the ramifications of coming forward with her experience, but her rational mind...which seemed to be taking charge more and more since Jack had arrived...told her it was the only sensible way to deal with it.

"Sam, I trust you. I know you would never be with someone else...not willingly. And I am so glad you were willing to trust me and talk to me about what happened. You let me into your head, and that tells me just how much you care about me. Now, how about we go get some rest. My shoulder is getting a bit sore. Actually I was surprised that ole Doc Frasier didn't seem very upset that I was AWOL from the base!"

He laughed and Sam did too. She had to admit she was feeling much better now...safer and loved. Jack always made her feel that way, and she thanked God he was here for her now. She let him lead her down the hall to her bedroom where they climbed, fully dressed, under the covers. He put his good arm around her, and she put her head on his shoulder. And soon they were asleep.

TBC