I realized a lot in the moment Danny Phantom transformed into my son during the disastorid incident. Sure, Jazz had already told us the two were one in the same, but it didn't really register until I saw it with my own eyes. Suddenly everything made sense, all the missed curfews, the sinking grades, the mysterious bruises. And that wasn't all I realized in that moment. As those rings split to reveal my son standing there so nervously, it hit me. I was bad mother.

Danny had been secretly defending the entire town, putting life and limb at risk for almost two years. He'd battled great Pariah's, monstrous weather ghosts, deadly hunters, and even us, his own parents. I remember looking at my hands on the plane ride home from Antarctica, Danny sleeping soundly beside me, and knowing these hand's had harmed my own child. That is something I will never forgive myself for, even though Danny wishes I would.

When we came home, it was even worse. As he enjoyed the fruits of his success (as he should) I couldn't help but wander around the house, thinking of all the times that his secret should have been obvious to me. He would disappear suddenly, he was always so tired, he always defended Danny Phantom; even our own equipment tried telling us our son was part ghost, but we never listened.

Turns out I was never been listening to my child. There were plenty of subtle hints at something big happening in my son's life, but instead of trying to help and understand him, I placed the very inventions that harmed him first. The irony was sickening.

Jack was struggling as well, but he had another ghost in the closet to deal with as well, no pun intended. Vlad Masters, who he thought was his one and true friend, turned out to be an evil, manipulative ghost, preying on me and Danny. Jack never told me what happened up in space, but whatever was said, it left a dark impression on my husband. When ever Vlad is even mentioned, all traces of his usual bubbly happiness leave, and a silent, miserable anger replaces it.

I myself had never trusted Vlad, at least not after the accident in college. Once the thief had 'miraculously' gained his fortune, he'd turned into more of a sneaky snake than I ever thought possible. Even worse, half the time I didn't even know it was him. Like when he tried to steal our ghost portal or the reunion incident. But the revelation of Vlad's ghost half left open more questions that I didn't even want to think about. How many times did I leave Danny alone with him, thinking I could at least trust him enough not to harm my son? How many times did we watch Phantom and the Wisconsin ghost fight each other tooth and nail, usually with the Wisconsin ghost on the upper hand?

Danny never talked much about what happened between him and Vlad, but I know there's a lot he's not telling us. Part of me doesn't want to know what that monster did to my baby, which probably still means I'm a bad mother. Every time I try and talk to Jack about it he clams up, listening to what I say, but taking every possibility of offense by Vlad and putting the blame upon himself. I can't stand to see him beat himself up like that, so I usually try and avoid the subject.

But lately, Danny's been closing in on himself. I've made sure to keep my eyes open to my son now, determined to never make such a huge mistake again. It's been months since the disastorid incident. In fact, the one year anniversary is quickly approaching. By now the media has far since died down, and things are starting to return to a sense of normalcy, something I know Danny is very grateful for. But every day the anniversary gets closer, Danny gets more and more reclusive.

At first, I couldn't figure it out. I tried talking to Sam, but she didn't know either. Whenever I'd try to approach Danny, he'd laugh and say it was no big deal, disappearing on the spot (literally) and escaping my worried prodding. But then one night, as I was making a last radar scan of the city from within the Op-Center, I caught him sitting on top of the hulking metal structure in his ghostly form, staring forlornly up into the starry sky as though looking for something. And then it hit me.

This was about Vlad Masters.

Instantly, anger and fear had threatened to boil over. I wasn't sure if the fiend had secretly returned and was tormenting my son or if this was all of Danny's repressed secrets finally escaping out. Either way, it didn't matter, I had to know if my baby was alright. Even if Vlad was still lost in the deep abyss of space (and hopefully he was), Danny still needed to talk to someone about what he was feeling. Last thing I wanted him to do is bottle it all up like a certain psychotic fruitloop.

So, after talking to Jack about it, we decided that I would talk to Danny first. I didn't want my son to see Jack taking the blame. Knowing Danny, he'd instantly make everything seem less than it is and blow it off as 'no big deal'. It was a couple days later that I managed to corner him just as he was flying in from a quiet patrol night, a light smile on his face when he saw me.

"Hey mom. Your up late." He floated to the floor, bright rings of light appearing for a moment and revealing my human son a second later.

I smiled wanly at him, closing the door softly behind me. Danny was quick to notice the change in atmosphere, and his smile slowly fell.

"What's wrong?"

"Danny..." I sighed, walking over to him and sat him down on the bed. He blinked at me, confusion in his eyes.

"Danny, you know you can talk to me about anything, right? And really sweetheart, anything. Especially now, when there are no more secrets between us."

He looked away, a troubled frown on his face, but didn't say anything. After a moment of silence, I let loose a sigh, gently holding one of his hands.

"Danny." I didn't continue until he was looking at me. "What's wrong?"

He stared at me, icy blue eyes piercing and keeping me frozen. After a long moment, he sighed and looked out the window to the stars twinkling high above.

"You think he's still alive out there?"

It was difficult, I admit, to keep my voice steady and level. I didn't care if Vlad was alive; who else could we be talking about? If I had my way, I would have locked him in a Fenton Thermos and thrown him into the Atlantic ocean, but I suppose space is good enough. However, for some reason Danny did seemed to care about him, and that troubled me.

"I don't know, sweetie."

Of course he couldn't be alive. Jack told me he was wearing nothing but a temporary air helmet in the cold atmosphere of space, and the air contained in it would have run out months ago. There was no way Vlad was alive...unless he had chosen to return to Earth before his air had run out. But if he had done that we would surely know by now, wouldn't we?

"You don't really care, do you?" He looked back at me, a sad smile on his face.

His miserable tone shook me from my thoughts, but I couldn't answer him truthfully. My lack of response was response enough though, and he sighed, turning his back to the window.

"I guess...I shouldn't care either." he continued, pulling his hands away from mine and leaning on his knees. "It's not like he deserves any care or compassion, after everything he's done. Especially not from me."

"What do you mean?" I asked gently, hiding the fear in my voice, wondering if now was when I'd learn of all the terrible things Vlad did to my child.

"Mom," He gave me a look, "No offense, but I dealt with Vlad's fruitloopyness for almost two years before the disastorid incident. Trust me, he's more of a desperate psycho than you know."

He almost laughed when he said this, shaking his head as though Vlad's past misdeeds were nothing more than reminiscent humor. But then his smile fell.

"At least he was..." he whispered.

We sat in silence for a moment, a dark cloud dragging Danny's shoulders down as he stared at the floor. I couldn't understand why Danny was feeling this way about Vlad. Was it pity? Vlad deserved nothing more than hate from my son, but it seemed he was getting the exact opposite. It just didn't make sense.

"Danny, do you...do you miss him?"

He glanced up at me, not missing the incredulous tone in my voice.

"Yeah." he breathed, quieter than a whisper.

I was too stunned to speak for a moment, and couldn't quite keep the stark confusion from coloring my tone when I finally found my voice.

"Why?"

He sighed again.

"You know what it's like to be half dead, mom?"

I almost gave a start at the sudden morbid question, but Danny didn't stop there.

"Or know what it feels like to transform into your ghost half? To loose half your humanity? Do you feel that unnatural pull to the ghost zone, and then do you feel right at home when your inside it?"

His voice quickly fell quiet, whispering now.

"I don't save people because it's the right thing. I mean, yeah, a little bit, but...the real reason is because I have to. I...I think it's my obsession." He made a face, but shrugged and continued on, "No matter how much people come to accept me, I always feel out of place, like part of me doesn't belong. And it's true, part of me doesn't belong here. Sometimes...sometimes my ghost half bleeds with my human half, you know? I have trouble remembering what's Phantom and what's Fenton. Everything feels out of place one day and the next it's back to normal, what ever the hell normal is." he shook his head, giving a bitter laugh before he turned to me.

"Do you understand what I'm saying?"

I blinked, not having a clue but not wanting to discourage him. However, before I could say something he turned his gaze back to the stars.

"That's why I miss him." He sighed.