A/N: Hellooo! I'm back! I can't believe it's been a month since I updated...fail. Blame school. Anywho, I've been working on this one shot for a while now, so I really hope you all enjoy. Gotta love some typical Bizzy snark. Oh yeah, and I'm currently working on chapter 30 for "Finding Our Way," so hopefully that will go up sooner rather than later. Thank you all so much for sticking with me!
Disclaimer: I don't own anything. Except two adorable baby girls.
A Montgomery Family Reunion
Addison's POV
March, 1990
"Addie, it's going to be fine," Derek tells me for what feels like the millionth time as we drive up to my parents' estate in Connecticut. Bizzy and the Captain are hosting the annual Montgomery family reunion, something I have very diligently been able to avoid until now.
"The event is being hosted at our house. As our daughter, it would be inappropriate and ill-mannered for you not to be there, Addison," Bizzy had said to me last week on the phone.
Sitting in the front seat of the car, I groan inwardly.
"I have done my absolute best to avoid these things since I moved out and went to college, and the one time I 'have' to go just so happens to be right after I have children, who now have to go through it too. My parents don't even have a stable marriage; this is just another way for them to fake it to everyone."
"I know, I know," Derek responds, not taking his eyes off the road. "And I agree wholeheartedly with everything you say about them, including that they weren't very good parents to you. But they are our daughters' grandparents, and a part of me thinks we should at least give them a chance…for our kids," he adds.
I sigh. "You're right. I don't like it, but you're right." I turn around in my seat and look at my two baby girls, asleep in their car seats, and blissfully unaware of the complicated maternal family to which they were born. Reaching my arm out, I run my hand along Laurie's little leg.
For the first time in their lives, I had put her and Rinny in dresses this morning, per Bizzy's request. Same dress, but Laurie's is purple and Rinny's pink.
"They look like dolls," Derek had said, picking up Laurie, who had cried the entire time I dressed her, and apologizing for putting her through such trauma.
"You think I would have made them wear these if I had a choice? If we don't show up with the twins in dresses I will never hear the end of it…"
Derek didn't argue with that. Really, there's no arguing with my mother, no matter who you are.
"And we're here," my husband pulls into the very long driveway to my parents' house.
"It'll be over before you know it, little ones," I say to the twins before getting out of the car.
"Oh thank God you're finally here," I groan inwardly at the sound of my mother's voice from the doorway. "People have just been dying to see the twins!"
I turn around after taking Laurie out of her car seat, holding her to my chest.
"Hello to you too, Bizzy," I give her as much of a smile as possible.
"You should have been here an hour ago. Come on, everyone's waiting inside."
Immediately as we walk in we're surrounded by a large crowd of snobby rich people. Silently, I curse my older brother for not bothering to show up; of course Bizzy wouldn't make him attend, but the least he could have done was be here so I don't get fed to the sharks alone.
"Oh come on, Addie, that's what that husband of yours is there for," Archer had told me over the phone. Yeah, thanks a lot.
Laurie, who usually loves human contact and attention, hides her face against my neck. It's almost as if at three months old, she already knows who to avoid.
"Oh just look at her," one of my aunts gushes, walking up to me. Unfortunately, the one aunt who I would actually like to see – Rinny's middle namesake, Angela – passed away three years ago. Yet another person to leave me alone with the sharks.
Derek and I don't even bother asking anyone if they want to hold either baby; we both know no one would want to ruin their clothes. Lucky for us, no one even asks. Standing next to one another in the living room, we take question after question. However, those people who were all "dying to see the twins" hardly even ask about them.
"You look pale, you must hardly get any sleep anymore!" A cousin of mine scoffs. "I would never have children…who has the time for screaming little things anyway? And just imagine the stretch marks!"
Derek opens his mouth to retort but I beat him to it.
"Believe it or not, they're actually well-behaved babies. So before you go making assumptions, I sleep five hours a night." And the stretch marks are so worth it, but I don't say that out loud.
The rest of the afternoon goes somewhat like this: my husband and I toting around a baby. Me wishing I could have a drink. My husband giving me his baby so he can go get a drink. Someone commenting on how pale I look. Someone commenting on my weight. Me wishing I could have a drink. And did I mention I wish I could have a drink?
Snapping me out of autopilot, the twins start to fuss. They're hungry.
"Addison, your 'well-behaved babies' are giving me a headache," Bizzy sighs from across the room.
"Don't worry Mother, I got it." I make sure to give her a look before heading upstairs, Derek on my heels.
"I'm in hell," I snap, pushing open the door to one of the guest rooms with my shoulder.
"You also might have to be the one to drive home tonight," Derek finishes, sitting down on the bed and rubbing his temples.
"I swear to God, we are never bringing them up here again. I don't want them growing up with this."
"And where has your father been this whole time? I thought you said this was a time for your parents to 'fake it?'"
"That's what I thought too. Apparently not. He's probably back in the guest house screwing the maid or something," I reply tartly, handing Derek the twins so I can get set up the pillows on my lap before feeding them.
He makes a face, not wanting to think further into it, before handing me the girls.
"Yeah, my thoughts exactly," I tell him. "Mommy's so sorry you two have to go through this," I look down at my two daughters. Rinny looks up at me before latching on. "I promise you Daddy's family is much better."
Derek snorts. "Yeah, because annoying girly sisters with tons of kids is so much better…"
"At least they're nice annoying sisters, and kids for Laurie and Rinny to play with. Not condescending, snobby, obnoxious…"
"I think I got it, honey," Derek interrupts.
I sigh again, running my thumbs over the girls' cheeks. Derek wraps an arm around my shoulders and I lean my head against him.
"As much as I want you to stay here with us, I think you should go make nice," I say after a moment. "Bizzy likes you more than me; go socialize and make her brag about you or something."
"Addie…"
"Or at least go have a drink for me. I'm dying here."
He chuckles. "Okay, okay. Whatever you say, boss. I love you." He kisses my cheek before leaving me alone with Laurie and Rinny. I look down at them and sigh.
"I hope today doesn't traumatize you too much."
The twins have been nursing for about 30 minutes when not only does the bedroom door open, startling the girls and me, but instead of it being my husband, who I would actually like to see, it's my mother.
"Oh, sorry dear I didn't realize you were using this room," she says, but makes no move to leave.
"Um, that's okay," I adjust the two babies on the pillow, wishing I had covered them with a blanket for more privacy. Then again, I didn't exactly picture someone walking in on us other than Derek. "They should be almost finished. Only takes about a half hour."
"So you're actually breastfeeding then?" Bizzy asks, trying her very best not to look too disgusted by the sight.
"It would appear that way," I reply. "How else do you suggest I feed them?"
"You don't seriously think I did that with you, do you?"
"Well that's where you and I are different," I look down at Laurie, on my right side. "I'm not going to hire someone to feed my babies, or give them a bottle just because it makes my mother uncomfortable. And since I took this term off from school, I'm around more. I have time for them."
Bizzy walks over and sits in a chair by the small table in front of the window. My first reaction is to be annoyed that she won't leave us alone, but honestly this is the closest she's come to her granddaughters since we got here.
"I'm only saying, you're a Forbes Montgomery. You have to be careful where you go about doing something like that. It's inappropriate."
"It's breastfeeding, Bizzy. Millions of women do it every day, and it's not like I go sit in the middle of Saks and rip my shirt off." I try to keep my voice down for the sake of the twins.
"Oh Addison, really," Bizzy makes a face.
"I'm just saying you act like it's the end of the world. And you acted as if putting them in anything but these ridiculous dresses would be the end of the world."
"You seem to have quite a bond with them," she adds after a moment, ignoring my jab. I look down at Laurie and Rinny and smile.
"I guess I just never knew it was possible to love two people so much, until I had them. I mean, obviously I love Derek and other people in my life, but this is a different kind of love. I'd give up my life for either one of them, no question. I'd do anything for them…"
"It's the mark of a mother dear," Bizzy looks down at her hands.
For a moment I just sit there, still propped against the pillows on the bed, and watch my mother. Growing up, she was one of the coldest most withholding people I knew. She never even held my hand, let alone told me she loved me. So what did I just hear?
"Yeah it is," I whisper, running my thumb along Rinny's cheek. Although three months old, her head still fits perfectly against the palm of my hand.
"Do you always keep them together like that?" Bizzy asks.
"They don't really like to be separated," I tell her. "Like I said, they're pretty easy babies, but not when they're apart for long periods of time."
It's almost as if I jinxed her that Laurie starts to stir and pulls her mouth away at the same time I said that. Resting Rinny, who's still nursing, against the pillow, I cover myself back up with my shirt and situate Laurie to burp her. But before I start patting her on the back, a thought occurs.
"Do you want to hold her?" I ask my mother.
"Oh, um, no that's quite alright dear. I'm wearing silk," Bizzy stammers. "And besides, I didn't even do this for you."
"She won't hurt you, Bizzy, she's a baby; a baby who, right now, needs to be burped."
"Addison, really, she looks fine where she's at."
"Okay, fine," I say, using one hand to pat Laurie's back lightly.
Bizzy sighs.
"Fine, give her here."
"No, don't worry about it. I don't want to inconvenience you," I say flatly.
"Addison, don't be difficult. I'll take the baby," she stands up to take Laurie. Reluctantly, I hand over my daughter.
"She better not spit up on me…" Bizzy mutters, sitting back down with Laurie after placing a cloth over her shouler.
"Ha, Laurie's spit up maybe five times since she was born, unlike this one who does it at least once a day. I think you'll be fine. If anything she'll just fall asleep on you."
Bizzy looks to the side at the little baby against her shoulder and pats her back lightly. Laurie gurgles.
"Addison you said she wasn't going to spit up!"
"Calm down, she's just talking to you," I chuckle, gesturing to the still very clean cloth on my mother's shoulder.
"Oh…" she looks at Laurie again.
"You can talk back to her if you want. I do it all the time," I look down at Rinny. "Huh?"
Rinny opens her eyes and looks up at me. Born almost a pound heavier than her sister, she eats more.
"Hello pretty girl," I smile down at her. I wonder if my mother is thinking about how different we are as parents as much as I am right now.
"Well, okay…" Bizzy looks at me with uncertainty. "Hello," she says to Laurie. "I haven't done this in a while…"
She probably hasn't done this, ever, I think to myself. Laurie gurgles some more against her shoulder, trying to lift up her head.
"You know, this would probably be much more fun if you would just burp," Bizzy mutters. I chuckle.
"But I bet you're going to grow up to be just as stubborn as your mother…"
"Hey!" I cut in, as Rinny pulls her mouth away finally. "I am not stubborn," I tell her, fixing my shirt and situating Rinny to burp her.
"Oh please, dear, let's not have this argument again. Face it, these girls don't stand a chance against your stubbornness gene."
I roll my eyes, patting Rinny's back. She turns her face toward my neck, and I already cringe thinking about the spit up that's bound to happen.
"You can definitely tell Katherine is Derek's daughter," she gestures to Rinny's dark hair.
"That you can," I kiss Rinny's head, continuing to pat her back. "Do you look like your Daddy, little one?"
Rinny yawns in response, making me chuckle.
"Laurie's got his eyes too," I note.
"Oh I…I hadn't noticed," Bizzy turns her head to look at Laurie again. She's got her eyes closed and probably isn't far from falling asleep. "She's sure taking her time to burp though."
"I can take her back if this is taking too long for you, you know."
"Addison, I said it's fine. Just let it go."
"Fine."
"Fine."
I sigh, and not a moment later Laurie burps.
"Told you it would be painless," I mutter.
"What was that?"
"Nothing," I look back up at Bizzy, who's now holding a very much asleep little girl. "Looks like she fell asleep on you. Good luck putting her down; Laurie likes human contact when she sleeps."
"Does she?"
"Mhmm. Your heartbeat calms her."
"She's beautiful, you know," Bizzy whispers. "She looks just like you did."
Was that yet another compliment, in one day? Really?
"Both my girls are beautiful," I answer automatically.
"Would you mind if I took Lauren downstairs for a little while? I know she's asleep, but I'll be out on the patio with your aunt. It won't be too loud."
I try not to look too surprised at Bizzy willingly spending time with one of her granddaughters.
"Um, no not at all," I tell her. "I'm sure Derek would like to see her anyway. I'll be down in a minute…don't want to keep them separated for too long."
"Alright then. Thank you, Addison." My mother stands up, carefully placing a hand on Laurie's tiny back before walking out of the room.
I look over at Rinny, who miraculously manages to burp and keep all contents in her stomach – a first.
"Well would you look at that, Rin? Your grandmother has a soft side after all. Who knew." I smile, kissing her head again. "Maybe all it took was you and your sister…"
Rinny looks up at me, following my voice. Bizzy was definitely right – there's way more of Derek in Rin than me – but that would never make me love her any less.
As if on cue, Derek enters the room.
"How's it going up here?"
"Oh you know, not bad," I tell him. "You'll never believe this, but Bizzy was just here."
"Seriously?" Derek sits down next to me on the bed, picking up Rinny's chubby little hand and kissing it. She gurgles in response.
"Yeah, and not only did she burp Laurie, but she took her downstairs to sit with Aunt Sarah."
"Well then I guess we could say that Laurie's made her first friend," he leans back against the headboard. "Although I'm not sure if that's a good thing or a bad thing. I should probably go rescue her at some point."
"Ha, all she had to do was fall asleep and Bizzy suddenly went into baby mode. I wish you could have been here to see it; maybe this hell isn't as bad as I thought."
I move the two pillows away and pull my knees up, leaning Rinny back so she's resting against my thighs. Her blue-green eyes are bright as she looks up at her father and me. I lean my head against Derek's shoulder.
"Derek," I mutter, caressing Rinny's soft arm.
"Yeah?"
"I'm so glad we did this."
"Did what? Come to the reunion?"
"No, this," I gesture toward Rinny, who's currently got her little fingers wrapped around my own. "The girls. I know they weren't planned and I'm taking a term off from school and everything, but I wouldn't trade them for anything. I'm glad we didn't wait, and I'm glad I have two babies with you."
Derek tilts my chin upward with his hand so that I'm looking at him. Slowly, he kisses my lips.
"Mmm that's borderline inappropriate to do in front of our daughter…" I smirk.
"Nah, Rin doesn't mind, do you sweetheart?" He tickles her little belly and she coos at us, giving another one of her almost-there smiles. Derek kisses my cheek and then shoulder a few times.
"Hmm honey…I told Bizzy I'd be down soon. Rin will start to miss her sister, or vice versa."
"I think that must be a twin thing," he muses. "I've never missed my sisters as much as these two manage to miss each other, and they're only three months old."
Derek reaches his arms out to take his daughter as we both stand up. Straightening my shirt, I follow him to the door. Rinny immediately makes herself comfortable and snuggles into his neck.
"Oh, honey, one more thing." I place a hand on Derek's shoulder and he turns to look at me.
"What is it, Addie?"
"I love you."
He smiles.
"I love you too."
In a somewhat better mood, I head back downstairs with Derek and Rinny. Talking to her, he walks around with Rinny, who gurgles back at him. I smile at the sight before grabbing a glass of sparkling water and going to search for my mother and baby.
Still sitting out on the patio with Aunt Sarah, Bizzy looks deep in conversation. I smile again, noticing Laurie awake and active in her grandmother's arms. Now that she's older and can see farther, after a moment of watching them, Laurie looks over Bizzy's shoulder at me and I wave at her playfully. Laurie responds by attempting to stick her entire left fist in her mouth, then placing a spit-covered hand on Bizzy's cheek.
I walk toward them, with a smile on my face and every intention of being cordial with my mother, but that smile soon disappears as soon as I hear the words coming out of her mouth.
"…I'm not saying my granddaughter isn't a good baby, I'm saying I still think it was a mistake for Addison to have children so young, when she had so much potential. Now that she's taking a term off from school, who knows if she'll even want to go back…"
I feel the anger bubble up inside me almost immediately after overhearing my mother. And the fact that she could say that while holding my baby (who is awake) at the same time makes me sick to my stomach.
"What did you just say?" I ask, even though I already know the answer.
Bizzy stands up, startled, and turns to face me.
"I didn't realize you were out here…"
"Yeah, well I am." I walk over and take Laurie from her before she can so much as protest. The baby fusses; I've startled her too. "I can't believe you could say something like that about your own grandchildren. Mistakes? Really?!"
My aunt looks uncomfortable, sitting in her chair and waiting for the inevitable fight to break out. But right now I don't even care.
"Addison you're overreacting. This is not the time."
"I don't give a damn what time it is," I cup Laurie's head to my chest, covering her ear. "Did you mean anything you said up in the bedroom? Were you even trying to bond with me or the girls?"
I turn around and march back into the house, looking for Derek and Rinny. We're going home. I don't want to spend another minute with these people I'm supposed to consider family.
"Addison, where do you think you're going? Do not just walk away from me!" Bizzy walks quickly after me.
"You know, I actually thought after that talk up in the bedroom that today wouldn't be so bad after all, but turns out I was wrong. We are going home. Feel free to come visit when you and everyone else can accept my life for what it is."
"What's going on?" Derek spots Bizzy and me about to get in yet another fight and immediately tries to break it up.
"Oh good, I was just looking for you. We're leaving." I head towards the door again.
"Wait, Addison what happened?" Derek looks concerned.
"I'll tell you in the car. I'm not spending another minute here."
"Addison, you're being irrational. You know what I said was true, no matter how much you don't want to believe it."
"You know what...no, that's where you're wrong. Having children and taking time off from school was my decision, not anyone else's. I'm perfectly happy with the way things are, and it's about time you and EVERYONE ELSE IN THIS DAMN HOUSEHOLD accepts that." I raise my voice during the last bit. "Goodbye, Bizzy."
20 minutes later, I'm driving while Derek sits in the back seat with two fussy babies. I know they were startled by our abrupt departure, and I feel bad, but right now I just want to get home.
"You gonna tell me what happened yet?"
Crap.
"I just…what Bizzy said…"
"What did she say, Addison?"
"It was about the twins…"
I can hear Derek take in a deep breath behind me. I glance in the rear view mirror; Rinny's got her fingers wrapped around his thumb.
"She said I made a mistake in having them, or rather, having kids so young, since I'm taking time off from school and what not. And she didn't say this part straight out, but I'm pretty sure the thinks I'll never make something of myself now that I have them." I feel a lump make its way to my throat. Just the thought of that makes me upset; if anything, my children make me want to be a better person, and make something of myself. I want to make them proud of me.
Derek is silent in the back seat.
"Yeah, I figured you wouldn't have anything to say," I sigh.
"Well…there's not a whole lot I can say. She's obviously wrong. How could she even say such a thing? School or no school, you're still the smartest person I know. Now, you're just a smart person with children. Doesn't make you any less smart…"
I smile from the front seat and stick my arm out behind me. Derek immediately takes my hand and leans forward to kiss it.
"Even when you don't know what to say, you still make me feel better."
"It's all part of the husband code, honey," he squeezes my hand.
"The 'husband code?'" I laugh.
"Don't ask."
"Okay then…"
"Addie, the only thing that matters is that you're happy, and you're where you want to be in life. You have two great kids and go to one of the best medical schools in the country. Oh yeah, and you have a pretty handsome husband. I'd say you have it made."
I laugh some more, taking my hand back. "Please, leave some room for our kids back there with your big head."
"Come on, I do not have a big head."
"You so do," I shoot back. "Just wait until you're actually a surgeon."
"Girls, does Daddy have a big head?" He asks the twins. "Ha, Laurie just shook her head! Eat your words, dear wife."
I glance in the rear view mirror again. Laurie is asleep.
"Then I think we should report Laurie a child genius – being able to shake her head 'no' and sleep at the same time. Nice try, honey…"
I feel better for most of the car ride home, thank to Derek and our banter. It never seems to get old. It's not until I pull into the driveway and carry Rinny into the house that I feel down all over again; like I'm a bad mother, or even though it's not possible yet, that my children think they're mistakes.
It's dark when we get home, and way later than when the twins are normally put in their cribs for the night. After one more feeding, I sit in the rocking chair with them, watching them sleep. Derek's already gone to bed, per my instruction; I didn't want to make him stay up and deal with this any longer, especially because in my heart I know what Bizzy said isn't true. The twins are not mistakes.
"I don't want you two to ever think that you were mistakes, or that you're not loved," I whisper to them. "I love you more than anything else in the world. Your mommy loves you so much, and Daddy, and you have a whole other family that loves you too."
The twins continue to snooze against my chest as I rock back and forth. I kiss both of their little foreheads, lingering just to feel their soft skin against my lips. Since I'm sitting in a dark room, it takes me a moment to realize that Laurie and Rinny are holding hands across my chest in their sleep. I could almost cry; sitting with these two beautiful little girls, I take comfort knowing that whatever happens to me or Derek, or anyone else in their lives, my daughters will always have each other.
Reviews would be lovely :) Thanks for reading!