Jean stared at the television screen in despair. Logan couldn't have been captured, it was a mistake. He had only left a week ago. But the live footage was of him, she knew there could be no mistake his pacing, the way he held his jaw taut and hands clenched, looking out from under dangerous hooded eyes. His sentence was carried out within two hours, the execution set for eight that evening. Her mind screamed to do something, but she had no way to go to him in time with no Blackbird to rely on. So she sat still, watching the crawl on the news channel, praying she'd see a report of his escape. Justin had taken the girls away at some point she couldn't be sure of, leaving Jean with Mac.

The ticking of the hall clock grew unbearably loud as the last minute of Logan's life was described by the newscaster, and her whole world went black.

"You have to drink something," Mac urged.

"Leave me alone."

"Don't make me take you to the hospital."

"My real name is Jean Grey, and I'm a telepath. I can stop you."

"I don't care who you are or what you can do, I have my own willpower."

"You aren't that stubborn," she muttered.

"Those girls need you."

"I can't take care of them anymore," she covered her face with her arms.

"Jean-"

"I want to die."

"Then do it somewhere else," he replied, leaving the room.

She did want to die, seeing his dead body on the screen had broken something in her. The strength she used to have was lost. But her power remained. Forcing her thoughts farther out than she ever dared to, she found that Emma was still in the city.

Emma. Come take the girls.

I don't want to be an auntie.

I'm serious, take them.

Jean...

Get out of my head.

Too late. That's the coward's way out.

Then I'm a coward, arent you happy I admitted it?

In any other circumstance, of course. But not this.

Just take them away.

Fine. I'll be there tomorrow morning.

Jean slept fitfully through that night, trying to shut out a small piece of herself fighting hard against the darkness of her heart. She hoped Emma wouldn't come, she hoped she could just close her eyes and be gone. As daylight came, she woke to find the girls asleep on either side of her, and her heart beat hard at the thought of leaving them. She closed her eyes against the sting of tears in her eyes.

"You won't really do it, will you," Kitty asked.

"I don't know."

"Logan wouldn't want you to hurt so bad."

"But I do, Katherine. I can't stop it."

"Please get out of bed, Jean."

Jubliee turned over, still asleep. Jean nodded and sat up with Kitty, feeling weak from days of not eating or sleeping. Kitty helped her stand, taking the older woman around the waist to help her walk into the hall. They walked out onto the porch, sitting on the bench as the sun came up in a sky full of blues and yellows.

"Are you hungry?"

"I don't know," she admitted.

"I'll get you something. You won't-" Kitty hesitated as she stood up.

"Take off running, no I don't think so," she smiled a bit, and it hurt.

The screen door shut behind Kitty, and Jean breathed deep despite the heaviness in her chest. She lost it so fast, was it possible she was only desperate to flee the pain? The sky was so light, gently pushing against the darkness in her heart, and she found herself yielding to the beauty around her. Could she truly end her life, knowing there was moments like these? Another breath seemed to clear her head further, and she looked up as a car sped toward the house. Kitty came out with an apple in her hand, looking warily at the car. Emma stepped out, tall and wearing her trademark white as always, free of any disguise. Kitty handed Jean the apple, who took a small nibble and rolled it around her tongue.

"I came because Jean asked-" Emma tried to talk to Kitty with some small amount of tolerance.

"I needed a friend," Jean amended, taking a large bite.

Changed your mind?

I think I have.

I came out here for nothing?

You can stay for awhile.

It took me almost two hours to get here, there's no way I'm driving back today. Far too taxing.

"Will you talk like normal people," Kitty asked.

"Sorry Kit," Jean apologized.

"Where am I staying?"

"She can stay with us in your room," Kitty offered.

Emma made a displeased noise in her throat, but didn't object to it. Mac stepped out onto the porch, giving Emma a nod before looking to Jean.

"Can we talk," Jean asked.

He nodded, and Kitty escorted Emma to the small house, ever polite no matter how the woman regarded her.

"I'm sorry."

"I know what it's like, being in a place that dark," he replied. "I didn't know if being tough on you was the right thing, but I couldn't see any other way. You have to live for yourself, I wasn't going to ask you to do it for me."

"I need help."

"We'll do anything for you," Mac nodded, accepting the hand she placed on his.