Hey everyone! So pleased to be able to squeeze out another update for OQUpdateMonth!
As always, thank you all so much for your support and reviews for this fic! I never expected it to get this much attention between both Movie and Update events, so I'm so incredibly grateful!
Without further ado, I do hope you enjoy this one! Let me know what you think!
"Wow," Robin breathes, looking around as he steps into the small but cozy-looking space. It's a place not necessarily so much of an actual room but more so a small nook, tucked away in another one of Dauntless's obscure corners. It's located in a dead end at the top of an abandoned staircase.
Beneath a small square window, there's a cot wedged in the corner, covered in a soft, plush-looking blanket of sapphire blue, a luxury that surely had been stolen from Erudite at the time of Regina's escape. An old lamp without its shade glows dimly by its side, casting shadows of the crumbling cinder blocks that lay stacked horizontally on top of one another against the concrete wall. They form a sort of makeshift display for the few treasures that Regina harbors: two books, a small ornate hand mirror, a glass paperweight shaped like an apple, and a single plastic jar holding a lone pearly white feather.
"Interesting place you have here," Robin remarks, taking a look around. He crinkles his nose at the slightly musty smell.
"What?" Regina laughs, seating herself on the edge of the cot. "Did you expect my place to be the size of the Pit? Or have glass walls? Huge bed with a canopy?"
Robin chuckles sheepishly, tilting his head with a guilty smile.
The brunette snorts, shaking her head as she grabs a hairbrush. She proceeds to run it through her curly locks, a gesture in which Robin easily finds himself lost. He stares at long delicate fingers as they weave their way through her hair's silkiness, the brush following shortly after. "I've already done that, dear."
Robin shakes his head. "You don't get lonely?"
"No." Regina shrugs. "I like being alone, coming back here and not having to worry about being found. The peace and quiet is nice…" she smirks slightly, eyeing Robin with a familiar sparkle in her eye, "especially after dealing with loud, reckless, incompetent initiates all day."
"So the only way to escape is to go and hide." Robin rolls his eyes. But he can't help but grin like a fool.
"I'm not hiding," Regina defends, "I'm retreating."
"Same difference," Robin says before lifting his palms in a placating gesture, "I mean, trust me. I certainly know the feeling."
"What's that?" Regina tilts her head.
Robin lifts his shoulders. "Just the comfort in finding a secluded place that only you know about. It's like a little sanctuary, like your other place on the roof overlooking the city. You feel untouchable, safe."
"Something tells me you can relate," Regina replies quietly, eyes peering up at him as she stills her brush and slowly lowers it down to rest on the mattress beside her.
Robin shrugs again, lowering his gaze to the ground. "I can relate to a lot of your experiences, actually," he admits with a sigh.
"How so?"
"Just… my father." Robin shakes his head. "He and your mother would have gotten along well, I think." He laughs humorlessly.
Regina's eyes bore into his, searching his with an intense desire to understand, maybe to even perhaps reciprocate the empathy he'd shown for her upon revealing her own story. The sentiment is beyond touching. "I always thought your father was a kind man," she says, patting the space beside her in gesture to have Robin sit, "I didn't think him capable of…"
"Well that's because he was good at hiding it," Robin answers, coming to sit beside her, "Even more so than your mother, I'm afraid."
"What was it like?"
Robin stares into Regina's large brown eyes, her look of sincerity almost overwhelming. "It hurt," he admits, "Everything just… hurt. My face, my arms, my back…"
"Your heart?"
He swallows thickly. He nods slowly.
"I know it's hard to believe that the same person who made you would be the one to see you as never good enough, never worthy of their love." Regina lays a hand over Robin's, smiling sadly.
"He always told me the whippings were for my own good, because he loved me…"
"My mother kept me hidden from the world, cooped up in that tower in Erudite with only books to keep me company, so much so that I couldn't help the need to sneak out every night, because she believed it was for my own good… because she claimed to love me."
"But all those beatings…"
"And all her words… It all proved otherwise." Regina turns to look out towards her few treasures tucked safely away, a faraway look in her eye. "I always wonder what it would be like if everything had turned out different… if my mother was loving, accepting of everything, of who I was."
"Does she know?" Robin asks quietly, "Does she know that you're Divergent?"
Regina shakes her head. "No. Only Gold knows. He found out the same way I did you, through the fear test." She closes her eyes. "If my mother ever found out, I'd be ruined… she'd be ruined."
Robin bites the inside of his cheek as a shiver dances its way down his spine. The leader of Erudite, the mastermind of the movement to exterminate all Divergents, having a daughter of her own who not only ran away but is also revealed as Divergent herself, Cora would indeed be ruined as a leader. She would have no choice but to kill her own daughter, which would only throw her entire campaign to have Erudite take over as the reigning faction into turmoil. And with Abnegation becoming more and more unstable by the day, as people start to tease apart Robin's father's leadership as prompted by Robin leaving, what faction then would be worthy to rule?
"Every day Gold threatens to reveal my secret should I not do what he asks," Regina continues, "He tells me I would be a valuable asset because I am what I am, as well as Cora Mills' daughter. So, he gives me a choice: to tip the scale or stay low and obedient." She scoffs at the last word, while still well aware of the weight it holds.
"I'm so sorry." Robin shakes his head, turning his hand upward to grasp Regina's that remains laid atop his. With his thumb, he strokes her smooth skin. He understands why she would feel the need to protect her mother, despite all of the horrible things Cora had done. Robin would feel the same way. No matter how much he wanted to, he hated leaving his father because he knew that people would talk, would question the old man as they do now. In a way, it was a selfish act.
"So now I'm stuck. Like I said before, I'm not free like I wanted to be." Regina's smile is heartbreaking as she lifts a shoulder, her voice breaking. "I have to follow orders given by Gold, that are really told to him by my dictator mother, to hunt and kill people like me. It just makes me feel like a monster…" With her eyes shining, she turns her head away.
"No, hey," Robin calls gently, lifting his free hand to gently nudge his finger against the side of her chin, slowly bringing her gaze back around to meet his. "The woman I know, the person sitting right in front of me, is the furthest thing from a monster."
"But I am evil."
"No, Regina." Robin gives a firm shake of his head. "You may have made mistakes in the past, yes. But you were hurting. You of all people know that there's far more to the story than what meets the eye. So no. You are not evil, and you are certainly not a monster."
She looks at him, her eyes so full of sadness. Again, she looks so lost. "Then what am I?"
"You're human," Robin responds simply. "You're strong, confident, incredibly brave—"
"I don't feel it."
"But you are. You're the strongest person I know. And, to be honest, I didn't really know what being Divergent meant. But when I look at you, I know now exactly what we are. And it's incredible." Robin smiles, sliding his hand up from Regina's chin to cup her cheek. Instantly, his heart warms as he feels her lean into his touch as her eyes flutter closed for a brief moment.
"Robin," Regina sighs, "I don't know what to say."
"Then don't say anything." Robin bites his lip, eyes dropping to her lips as she parts them slightly with a silent sigh. He doesn't realize how close he'd leaned towards her and she towards him until he feels her warm breath upon his lips. His heart pounds as he lifts his head, tenderly brushing his lips against hers in a wordless gesture to seek permission. And it's when she further opens her lips that he captures them fully. Eyes flutter closed as he tastes her sweetness. He moves his lips with hers in perfect synchrony, this soft kiss stimulating a myriad of nerves and an electrifying warmth that builds in both his heart and lower abdomen. His hand finds its way up to tangle within the tresses of her hair, large ringlets curling around his fingers as he cups the back of her head in earnest.
But just as quickly as it had happened, the moment ends, as Regina is abruptly pulling back, leaving Robin's head spinning. She looks at him again with those wide eyes; fear, excitement, and need all mixed together to create one unforgettable gaze.
"I shouldn't, I just…" Regina shakes her head. "I told you I don't do love…"
Robin's mind races as he tries to string together a cohesive sentence, still completely overtaken in the aftermath of something he'd thought would never happen. And with this last statement… "Regina, I—"
"It's dangerous to love me," she insists, dark orbs glistening. "Look what happened last time…"
"I'm not afraid," Robin says, reaching up to cup her cheek once more. "They may be able to control everything else about us, but they can't control this. Trust me."
"I do," Regina states quickly, "I do trust you. I just don't trust me."
"But I do." He smiles again. "I trust you. So you can use that for the both of us."
Regina stares at him, a look of disbelief, of awe, overcoming the fear and uncertainty that swirl within her eyes. Her hand slowly rises up to grasp gently at Robin's hand as he continues to let it linger by her cheek. Eyes angled downward, she spares a quick glance at the inside of his wrist, at the lion tattoo he'd gotten in her honor.
"It suits you," she compliments, slowly taking his hand from her face and bringing it down between them to get a better look. The fingers of her free hand trace gently over the bold marking, sending another bout of pleasant shivers down Robin's spine. The touch, whether she realizes or not, is mesmerizing. It has him almost frozen on the spot.
"Had it with you in mind," Robin confesses. He bites his lower lip again as a shy smirk tilts up the corners of his mouth.
At this, Regina snorts a soft laugh, shaking her head again as she meets his eyes once more. "What you see in me is just beyond," she marvels, "I don't understand."
Robin shrugs. "I see in you hopefully the same thing that you see in me," he admits.
"And what's that?"
"A second chance."
Regina presses her lips together, tilting her head in acknowledgement. "I suppose I can't argue with that."
"And you're a great kisser."
It's a joy to see Regina throw her head back, and to see her let out a hearty, unbridled laugh.
Robin shakes his head, beaming brightly back at her. "I just have one question."
"And what's that?"
"What's your tattoo?"
At his question, the brunette's lips pop open. Though, she does seem to tamper her surprise rather quickly as a sly expression quirks up her lips and that sparkle returns in her eye. "You want to see it?"
Robin swallows, feeling his cheeks heat as his heart races once more at the prospect. Too soon?
Regina shifts, scooting herself around to face her back towards him. Apparently not.
With his heart in his throat, he watches as she crosses her arms in front of her, slowly beginning to lift the ends of her plain black sleeveless t-shirt. Little by little, she teases out the bold markings that stretch down the entire expanse of her back as the shirt slowly slides up. And Robin can't help his jaw from dropping open.
For there, are revealed the circular symbols of all the five factions, all imprinted down the length of her spine. And from their center, are spread dark streaks of charcoal in a sort of wing-like pattern that extends outwardly across the rest of her back, covering what's left of her torso and shoulders.
"Regina," Robin breathes as the brunette reaches a hand behind herself to undo the clasp of her bra so that he may get a better look. He lifts a hand, unable to refrain from lightly touching this beautiful masterpiece. In doing so, he almost misses the way Regina's breath hitches upon feeling the soft pads of his fingers upon her heated skin. "This is… This is amazing."
Regina peers over her shoulder at him, returning nothing but a gentle smile.
"Why all of them?"
"I don't want to be just one thing," she answers quietly, "I want to be all of it: intelligent, selfless, truthful, brave, and kind."
Robin shakes his head, unable to help the adoring grin that spreads across his lips. "You are all of those things."
"Yes, well," Regina chuckles, "I'm still working on kind."
Robin shakes his head again, slowly raising his hand from her back to cup once more at her cheek. Her dark eyes stare expressively at him, plump lips popping open once more with a soft breath. He becomes lost in them once again, entranced and bewitched. And it appears as if she feels the same. Not even a gunshot can break their trancelike state as Regina shifts once more, slowly turning back around to face him, without breaking eye contact.
Adam's Apple bobbing, Robin bites his lower lip again before leaning forward. He captures her lips once more. Though this time, their kiss feels different—more passionate, heated by all the rawness and vulnerability spilled out into the open air between them. All cards are on the table now. And with nothing left to say, Robin kisses Regina like he'd never kissed before. His tongue begs for more, to which she obliges, much to his delight. And with it, he searches eagerly the unexplored territory before him. Her taste enchants him, her lips magical. They mold to his in a way he'd never thought possible, shooting sparks down his body and lighting every nerve, awakening every muscle, and leaving him with an indescribable yearning for more.
A soft, breathy moan erupts from Regina. It is pure music to his ears. Robin pulls gently back, looking with wide eyes at the flushed expression that welcomes his gaze. She's panting ever so slightly, the desire written so clearly across her features.
"May I?" Robin rasps, chancing a glance down to where her open bra still hangs limply across the front of her chest.
And it's Regina's turn to bite down on her lip as she gives a slow nod. And that's all the invitation Robin needs to hook his fingers around the straps of her bra, drag them down her arms, and reveal to himself in full what she's so willing to give.
