A/N: I don't own 'Iris' by the Google Dolls or 'So Alone' or "So Allien' by Anna Blue. Nor do I own Lilo and Stitch characters. Everything else is my own creation.

Ch. 10 New Look

Morning...

I open my eyes, stretch and walk a bit. I lay back down looking to clouds, hoping everything I did was just a bad dream and not reality; though it was real. What is wrong with me. I just want to fly away from any people, trying to forget what I did to Sapphire. My god! She would never want me back now, never take me back for as long as I live. I'm going to be alone for the rest of my life. Well, I can do all those things couples can't do and enjoy them. ...Yeah right, I'll still feel guilty for doing that and it is going to haunt me for the rest of my life. In my waking world and my nightmares, how could I do such a thing to her?

I try to calm myself down as I felt the urge to cry and vomit at the same time; finally, when I found peace I was going back to sleep and hopefully not remember any of this.

My peace was interrupted when I heard a familiar voice calling my name, "Marcus!"

I turn to see who would be calling and see Jon, I roll my eyes and stand up. I was about to walk away, until he places his hand on my shoulder.

He asks with happiness of seeing me, "Hey, how have you been?"

I push his hand off my shoulder and just walk away from him. He runs in front of me and blocks my path.

He asks in a concern tone, "What's your problem? Ever since graduation, you seem to be distance and everything. Though when you went to Stitch's world and return with Sapphire, you seem to be so happy and now you're even worse than before. What's wrong?"

I completely ignored him, but he remains adamant and stand his ground. "Look at me when I'm talking to you!"

He was getting on my nerves and I respond, "You want to know! Well guess what. You just...just don't understand."

Jon asks, "Why? Tell me what the parts I wouldn't understand?"

I simply finish, "I need to get going."

He grabs my left wrist and shouts, "Answer me!"

I remain quiet, looking at his hold on me.

I grumble so low, only I could hear myself, "Worst mistake when I'm so not right these days. You better let me go, or else."

He repeats, "Answer-", but before he could finish his statement.

I move my wrist around, grabbing onto his wrist, pulling him to me and use my left arm to elbow his rib-cage. He takes a couple of steps back, looks to me and walks up to me. Before he can grab me, I sweep kick him onto the ground. I stand, walk over to him, grab his throat and pick him up high then rushing until I push against him the tree.

I whisper sternly and coldly, "I don't need to answer your fuckin questions. When I said I need to get going, doesn't mean you voice whatever or are free to say anything. Got it?"

He nods. I let go of Jon, he falls to the floor and grabs his throat. He coughs while he looks up to me and realize he would've pass out if I held him any longer or worse. I walk away from him before pushing buttons on my bracelet and looking back at him before I disappear into the trees.

Jon's P.O.V.

I stand up, pat myself and then I realize that something isn't right and so I search my pockets again.

My eyes widen and shout in disbelief, "That scumbag took my wallet!"

I holler as I run in the direction Marcus went off to, "Marcus! Marcus, come back here!"

Americus' P.O.V.

When I knew the coast was clear for me I press the buttons on my bracelet and teleported myself to any other destination. Once out, I look around, seeing I'm in a town somewhere and not really giving a fuck about this place. I just continue walking around, until I see this bar and so I enter inside. When I enter inside is when every single person stop what they were doing and looked to me, I completely blew each one anyway. I just wanted to forget today and the best way was to drink some booze. I go to the bartender and he looks frighten by my appearance.

I demand him, "Give me the strongest drink here!"

He stutters, "I-I-I-I.D. is-is re-required!"

I shot a glance at him, jumping from the floor and landing onto of the table. I look straight into his eyes and threat him, "Give me the drink or you can say goodbye to your business!"

He says scared, "Yes, sir. Your order will be finished shortly."

I reply with a nod, "Good."

He walks away, still a little shaken by my little order and I turn around to see everyone staring at me.

I shout aggravated, "What! You never seen a guy drink before! Go back to your fuckin' business will ya!"

They all stop looking at me and quickly went back to their businesses. I sit back down and just grab my head, I look over to see what looked like a tattoo body shop and body piercing place combine into one in the bar. Once the bartenders comes back with my drink and he places it in front of me.

He stutters, "It-It's ca-called Heaven Cl-Clear. Be-Because we used-ed different dr-drinks like we-we mixed a Z-Zombie and Long Island Ice Tea with some Everclear to-to create this. It-It's on the house. Just t-take is slow."

I grab the drink and head into the Tattoo/ Body Piercing Shop, wanting to get a new look. I see the guy standing there, reading his magazine and doing absolutely nothing else.

I shout, "Hey you!"

He closes his book, looks around, shrugs and reads his magazine again.

I scream, "Look down here you fucking idiot!"

He closes his magazine, looks over his desk and is first taken by surprised.

I demand, "Yes, I know I'm a little blue fuckin' alien. Big whoop. Now, I want you to give me a tattoo of a wolf on my left arm. Any wolf will do, just as long as you place it on my left arm."

He asks, "Oh really and what if I deny your request?"

I place my drink on his counter, jump on it and jump up to the vent, bite it and chew it in my mouth. I spit out, reforming it in my hands and make a knife. I jump down and show him my masterpiece slowly making it press against his body.

I reply slowly, "Does this answer that question."

He nods his head.

I state, "Good, now let's do this thing."

He asks while shaving my fur off my left arm, "Are-are you like dr-drunk or something?"

I shot a glare at him and he understood how sober I was, he shuts his mouth and continues shaving my fur. Once he has a good amount removed, he starts the outlining of the tattoo and then looks back to me.

He asks, "What's eating you?"

I comment annoyed, "Wanna know how many people nearly died when they ask or rephrased questions like that."

He nods his head no and I add, "Good, because I don't want to add another body to that growing list. Now finish this as much as you can."

Once an hour pass with me waiting and him doing his job. He was finished with it, it was a nice outline of a wolf's head formed by the winds.

I say with a nod, "Not bad, now time to pierce my ears."

He denies, "No way. I can't pierce your ears, considering they're not even human ears. It's impossible."

I jump off the table, land onto the table and grab his throat lightly while popping out my claws on my other hand in front of his face.

I growl angrily, "What was that!"

He stutters, "I-I said, it's g-going to be a ch-challenge piercing your ears. Not impossible, b-but difficult."

I release him and pull back my claws while walking back.

I say with a big smile, "Good."

He asks, "One or both?"

I reply, "One on my right ear."

He rubs some alcohol on it, sets the machine and presses the button. When he pulls back, I see the small diamond stud.

I look at it and say, "Thanks for it."

He replies, "No-No problem. Just please, don't hurt me."

I take out Jon's wallet, place the right amount of the table and leave with my drink, I look at it. I shake it and it still looks good to drink. I open my mouth and pour the thing down my throat. Next thing I know, they're turning the radio on and a song starts to play.

And I'd give up forever to touch you
'cause I know that you feel me somehow
You're the closest to heaven that I'll ever be
And I don't want to go home right now

My thoughts, 'Exactly, Sapphire was the closest thing to me that made me feel ever so lively and now I lost her. For good this time and I didn't do anything to her; yet, she broke up with me. She even said it herself.'

And all I can taste is this moment
And all I can breathe is your life
'cause sooner or later it's over
I just don't want to miss you tonight

My thoughts, 'She was my everything to me and now she is gone. That's why I'm drinking the pain away, hopefully.'

I ask the bartender, "Can I please get the same drink?"

He nods his head and leaves, while I listen to the song.

And I don't want the world to see me
'cause I don't think that they'd understand
When everything's made to be broken
I just want you to know who I am.

My thoughts, 'That's right no one here understands me at all and the one person who I wanted her to know the real me was; for who I am, won't accept me anymore.'

And you can't fight the tears that ain't coming
Or the moment of truth in your lies
When everything feels like the movies
Yeah you bleed just to know you're alive

My thoughts, 'I've been hiding my sadness all day. I'm tired of that and this. Please, please; I'm praying that this is all a bad dream and that when I wake up, I'm by Sapphire's side and holding her in my embrace. But since I can feel my heart pounding and since I can feel pain in my arm and ear, this is the real world. This is a real life, my life without Sapphire.'

My tears start to make their way down my face because I never came to the realization, until this moment. This moment showed me that she is never wanting me back, never going to accept me and never going to share her love for me. That maybe she's right and I'm a monster and I'm bad and evil, and all I ever be is a monster. All I ever be is an evil creature and bad person. Monsters don't deserve to have families, friends or love ones because the monster scares them away. Just like what I'm doing, I've scared away my closest friends and I've no one let for me. I'm alone and alone I'll always be.

And I don't want the world to see me
'cause I don't think that they'd understand
When everything's made to be broken
I just want you to know who I am

And I don't want the world to see me
'cause I don't think that they'd understand
When everything's made to be broken
I just want you to know who I am

And I don't want the world to see me
'cause I don't think that they'd understand
When everything's made to be broken
I just want you to know who I am

I just want you to know who I am
I just want you to know who I am
I just want you to know who I am

By the end of the song, the bartender has already put my drink in front of me. But I'm too sad to reach the cup, I look to the cup and grab it.

"Down the hatch it goes," I say as I wolf down the drink.

I ask the bartender, "Another one! Make it a double!"

After a couple of drinks, I pull the cash from Jon's wallet and pay the bartender. I then bump into many people and apologizing myself for it. After many bumps, I exit the bar and trudge away from it. I look around to make sure the coast is clear and then I start to run into the night, taking many shortcuts until I've reached a solitude place. I extend my lower arms and count the cash I've 'found' and place it back into Jon's wallet. I push buttons on my bracelet and then teleport myself back home, but in front of Jon's place. I push my bracelet and it turns into my holophone, I text Jon. But, he doesn't respond back and I assumed he was sleeping. I turn it back into a bracelet an then walk up to his house; I use my claw in his door and once I open the door. I come in and carefully crawl around the place. I didn't want to get caught for returning something, I found his scent and went into his room. I open the door and place the wallet under his hand, I look to him.

I say lowly, "I'm so sorry about how I acted, I know that this doesn't pay for it and I know you'll never want anything to do with me. It's just that I lost Sapphire and I feel like I'm losing my grasp on reality. I just want to say this to you, Goodbye Jon and thank you."

I quietly leave his room, the crawl out of his house and lock the door. I push buttons on my bracelet, teleporting me to Blaze's new-new house. I go into the window and see that he is still up with his family, so I jump down and just look at it from the outside.

I state breathy, "Goodbye Blaze, thanks for everything."

I push the buttons on my bracelet and teleport myself to Luis' house, I look from the street at his apartment and see that the lights are on.

I whisper, "Bye, Luis. Take care of yourself."

I push more buttons on my bracelet and teleport to Sasha's place, I walk up the window and see that see is too sleeping.

I say softly, "Goodbye Sasha, please take care of Jon."

I then push the bracelet and it takes me home, I enter inside using my claw and thinking about all the memories about home and about my family.

I say lowly, "Goodbye my family."

I leave my household, pushing buttons on my bracelet and taking me to Lilo's house. I go and see Sapphire sleeping by herself, how she looks so majestic and beautiful there.

I walk up and kiss her forehead and say, "I'm so sorry for whatever I've did to you. I hope you can forgive me. Goodbye Sapphire."

I walk out and into the bathroom, I look into my image and I'm disgusted by what I see. I didn't really notice at how much I change myself and now wishing I've never done it. I leave the place, only to teleport to back to my place and steal some liquor from my house. I drank as much as I could to help me heal the pain. When I start feeling the alcohol's power prowling my body I decided to make myself scarce and so I teleport back from my house to Lilo's and once there. I walk to the beach, like it was calling me and I couldn't help but walk towards it.

My face against the window pane
A tear for every drop of rain

I sit on the sandy beach and looked at my appalling reflection. I swing my arms trying to destroy it, but all it did was make the image blur for some time until I stop and saw it again.

I am so lonely and so sad
You're the reason that I'm feeling bad
I am so lonely and so sad
Living in a dream I've never had

I release more tears as I can feel myself truly lonesome and nothing but sadness in my heart. I look at the reason for my pain and suffering, me. I made myself feel bad, suffer through hell and now what. I've no one left for me and the only emotion other than pain and hopelessness is the pain of depression. I close my eyes, dreaming of the perfect future for me and Sapphire and how now that will only remain a dream from now on. I cry more tears as soon as I stand from the beach and start walking to the ocean.

My face against the window pane
A tear for every drop of rain
I'm living like already I have died
Have died

I look down to the water and all I see is a horrible monster, making me cry harder because everything I ever did-was just specs of nothingness as I'm nothing.

Emptiness a present past
A silent scream to shatter glass
I have to go; it's time for me to fly

I try to keep myself focus on what I was doing, no matter how much I would rather trash something or break something. My time has finally rang its bell. The water was up to my abdomen as I walk further into the open waters.

I am so lonely and so sad
You're the reason that I'm feeling bad
I am so lonely and so sad
Living in a dream I've never had

(Wake me with your kiss)

I think back and see how many wrong things I've done, making this seem more and more the right thing to do. I want this to equal out my mistakes, helping me with my sadness and making me stay in my dream forever. All I needed was death's cold kiss.

Who will care if I'm not here?
If suddenly I disappeared?
No one's gonna notice it at all

I say sadly, "No one is going to care if I'm gone because of all the problems and troubles I made and the pain I caused. If I just disappeared right now, no one will know of it."

Dying flowers in my hand
I'm vanishing from where I stand
It isn't yet too late to get the truth

I imagine myself fading into the background of every memory and I wasn't even fully under the water.

I am so lonely and so sad
You're the reason that I'm feeling bad
I am so lonely and so sad
Living in a dream I've never had

I shout, "I'm a dumb motherfucker! I've lost everything dear to me and there is nothing I can do that can fix this! Except remove myself from the problem, without me here at least none of them won't feel my burden!"

So lonely and so sad
You're the reason that I'm feeling bad
I am so lonely and so sad
Living in a dream I've never had

I walk slowly into the ocean, as it rises from my chest.

I am so lonely and so sad
You're the reason that I'm feeling bad
I am so lonely and so sad
Living in a dream I've never had

Now the water was near my neck, but I continue walking to the ocean.

So lonely and so sad
You're the reason that I'm feeling bad
I am so lonely and so sad
Living in a dream I've never had

(Wake me with your kiss)

It finally comes over my head as I sink deeper and deeper; awaiting for Death's kiss to wake me from the nightmare and take me to where I won't feel any pain. I can feel myself losing the battle to breathe, as my spirit dwindles down and the view of ocean is slowly being replaced with darkness. I close my eyes, sleeping in my watery grave and waiting to see where I'm sent. I feel myself hit something, I open my eyes and I see Sinker there. He pushes me out of the ocean harshly and I land on the beach hard, the force was strong enough to make me cough up my contents and the water.

I mutter, "Thanks a lot Sinker."

He replies, "Ih."

I close my eyes, too tired from everything and slept on the beach.