A/N: Here we go... strap in, kiddies. This chapter is sure to twist you and turn you. There's something for everyone in this one. Sit back, relax, get your stress ball and your tissue box. Ready, set... go.

Thanks to my pre-readers, Keye and Sandy, for their awesome help, support and friendship. This chapter they both helped with the musical inspirations. You guys are the best!

Props to my awesome beta, Jess (jkane180), for always helping me improve my writing and making me sound better. I still don't know how she fits in all that she does. Best beta ever.

Chapter 10

~Breathe Me~

PLAYLIST for this chapter:

Possession (Jon Fryer Mix) ~ Sarah McLachlan – this is a grungier version of Possession with some awesome guitar riffs.

Can't Lose You ~ Type O Negative

Your Hand in Mine ~ Explosions in the Sky

Breathe Me ~ Sia

Time of Dying ~ Three Days Grace

In the Arms of the Angel ~ Sarah McLachlan and Josh Groban

~*Edward*~

When considering what to give Izzy for Christmas, I deliberated long and hard. It's in my nature to over-think everything, but, in this case, I felt it was warranted. Different aspects of me were at war within myself: the rational part of me that knew I needed to take things slowly with Izzy, fully aware that they were going extremely well under the circumstances; and the unreasonable, possessive, vampire part of me that wanted to claim his mate immediately. I was having increasing difficulty dealing with my vampiric nature, and I suspected becoming Izzy's Dom had a lot to do with it—vampires are naturally possessive over their mates, and the characteristics of a Dom fit nicely with my instinctual urges. I had agreed to be patient, to be what Izzy needed, but, at this point, if Izzy was with another man, I feared I would completely lose it.

I contemplated telling her she was my mate, but Alice shook her dark head. "She's not ready, Edward. You've come so far; don't rush it."

My thoughts strayed to gifts that might show her what I was feeling without requiring discussion of a firm commitment. I tossed out several ideas, rubbing a finger over my leather cuff as I sat in contemplation, and that's when the idea of having a leather cuff made for Izzy struck me. I needed to discuss it with my family first, but it proved to be a short discussion—they all agreed that I was the happiest they'd ever seen me, and they wanted what was best for me. Even Rosalie grudgingly admitted that, since Izzy was my mate, there was really no discussion to have—she was a member of the family now. I found her admission rather surprising, but I wasn't about to look a gift-horse in the mouth, considering that the giving of the Cullen Crest that was so precious to us all had to be a unanimous decision.

Izzy's reaction to my gift was more than I could have hoped for. Although she had trouble speaking at first, I could tell it was because she was putting the pieces together, that she understood that this was a serious commitment without having to say the words. My beautiful girl pulled herself together like a champ.

I can't adequately describe the feelings that Izzy's gifts brought up inside me. To be handed a journal with some of her private thoughts was amazing. I wasn't surprised when she informed me I wasn't allowed to read it in her presence; Izzy had a hard time articulating her feelings, and I imagine it would be uncomfortable for her to watch someone digesting them in front of her.

The charcoal she'd made for me was beautiful, and I was honored that she saw and accepted me as her protector. The drawing showed me that, on some level, Izzy knew she was my mate. I would move heaven and earth to live up to being her protector, lover and mate. Every time I touched her or made love to her, it became harder not to tell her everything, not to claim her as mine properly. Then there was the matter of changing her; Izzy wasn't ready to be turned yet. She had a lot of issues and trauma to work through before she could hope for a decent existence as a vampire. I no longer felt guilty about wanting her to be mine forever; call me selfish, but I wanted her with me, beside me, for eternity.

Making love to her in the living room beneath the twinkling lights of the Christmas tree was incredibly special to me. Izzy was becoming freer with her feelings, agreeing to make love with me almost all the time now.

I wanted to kick myself for allowing my instincts to be overwhelmed with mating; it was the only time James had a chance of sneaking up on me, and somehow he knew it. I doubted he was lucky enough to catch me in a compromising position twice.

Izzy was riding me hard, and I felt myself going under as she cried out, "Come with me, Edward... Oh, God!" A tide of sensations washed over me, and I allowed myself to be carried away as my seed pumped into her hot core.

"Izzy... yes!" I moaned, my hands all over her. The aftershocks continued as her walls quivered around my twitching hardness, and I could have stayed inside her heat forever...

But then I smelled him. James.

It all happened quickly then. There was a thump as he dropped the box to the porch... his memories of choosing and preparing the contents caused my stomach to clench. My phone vibrated, and I pulled Izzy up off my lap as I zipped my pants to answer Alice's call. Alice assured me that James had no intention of confronting us tonight; he just wanted to leave his little gift.

Naturally, Emmett came bounding into the house spouting about what was in the box. Not that I could have kept it from Izzy; I knew that she would have the need to be fully informed, but I just didn't want to do it quite that way. She made me tell her what was in the box, her cinnamon eyes fierce and demanding.

"Jesus Christ, Edward!" The words slipped out before her usual defenses had a chance to come up.

"Izzy, I won't let him near you. You have to trust me to protect you." I tightened my hold on her.

"I do, Edward; I do. He's just so sick."

Looking down at her, I saw a strange look cross her face. Izzy was thinking about something—hard.

"What are you thinking, love?"

"Nothing."

I looked over at Jasper, who was sitting quietly on the couch, and he was staring at Izzy with an intense look of concentration. Suddenly, understanding dawned, and he looked away, but not before I saw the horrified expression on his face. Self sacrifice, Edward. She's willing to let him have her to save you. Don't tell her you know—at least not yet. She needs your stability, and if she thinks you're going to fight her, she won't trust you.

Grabbing Izzy tighter against me, I nodded imperceptibly to Jasper. Fear flooded through me at the thought of Izzy going up against James—knowing I could lose her. We just had to keep that from happening.

~*o*~

School returned to normal soon after Christmas break, which was both good and bad. Izzy continued to live with us and sleep in my bed. Her insatiable appetite for sex kept us up late most nights, and I was making up for lost time after a century of being a virgin. I decided to save that little tidbit for when I broke the news about Izzy being my mate; I didn't think she would be able to understand the reason I remained celibate for so long without having to explain the whole mate situation. Not being completely honest with her really rankled, but I was doing the best I could with what I had to work with. I hoped that soon I would be able to come clean with her.

Lauren flaunted her relationship with Riley around school. She had no idea he was a vampire, and through her memories, I could tell that he sometimes donned colored contact lenses because she thought he had brown eyes. He'd explained away his coldness by claiming to have a circulatory problem. I wondered why he was with Lauren and how they'd hooked up, but I never caught the information in either of their minds.

Riley continued to flirt outrageously with Izzy. The fact that she shot him down time after time only seemed to increase his interest further. I had to bite back a growl every time I saw his smarmy form hanging around near school. Exploring his mind, I gleaned many detailed fantasies starring Izzy. He wanted her for his own, but I didn't 'hear' anything that indicated he wished her any harm, which is the only reason why I hadn't chased him away from the school permanently... yet. Riley threatened once to cause a 'supernatural scene in front of the children,' which wouldn't bode well for my family, so I decided to hold back for a while.

One day, I was heading out to the parking lot to meet Izzy when I caught sight of Riley chatting her up near his car. I only caught the tail end of their conversation, but I could see in Riley's mind that he knew the pearls he'd placed around her neck would piss me off. He was hoping Izzy and I would have a fight, and he could swoop in to pick up the pieces. The only pieces he was going to be picking up would be his own limbs if he wasn't careful.

With a growl, I stalked up to them. "In my car, now." Turning on my heel, I headed straight to the Aston Martin, fully expecting Izzy to follow. I could hear Riley trying to persuade Izzy to give him a chance with her, suggesting that I wasn't treating her right, and I ground my teeth as anger surged through me. The only thing that stopped me from jumping out of my car was our location... and he knew it. He knew that I could hear every word they said, and his parting shot was to let her know he'd be waiting when she was 'done' with me—as if he figured I meant nothing to her—and a kiss on the cheek. He also knew damn well that kissing her on the cheek would leave his scent on my girl. I was so pissed that I couldn't look at Izzy when she got in the car.

"What the fuck is your problem, boyscout?" she snapped.

Oh, I wasn't feeling like a boyscout at all.

"What makes you think there's a problem?" I asked tightly, staring straight ahead.

"Um... your fucking attitude? Ordering me into your car?"

I said nothing. I wasn't in control of my temper or my mouth at the moment.

"Why won't you look at me?"

Izzy sounded frustrated and perhaps a big frightened, and I couldn't find it in myself to give a shit. Throwing the car into gear, I took off, laying down rubber. Usually, I ran to work off my frustrations, but since that avenue was not open to me at the moment, driving fast was a lesser release valve. Almost immediately, I scented Izzy's arousal, and she rubbed her thighs together. Despite the anger, I had a roaring erection in seconds.

"Take me home," Izzy demanded.

"No."

"What the fuck, Edward? I said-"

Her words were cut short when I snatched up her wrist, curling my fingers around it. I could feel her pulse pattering against my fingertips, and this both calmed me and turned me on at the same time. My dick twitched in my pants, and I wanted her right there in the car. I wanted to pull over and spear into her like an animal. That's when I realized I needed to gain some control over myself as well as her. She wasn't a vampire—she was breakable.

"Isabella," I growled at her, baring my teeth slightly. "It would be best to remain silent for the time being."

Izzy stopped breathing, and the smell of her arousal increased—again, nearly causing me to pull to the side of the road and have her. Venom filled my mouth, and I swallowed it back.

"Yes, Mr. Cullen," she answered quietly, casting her eyes down. It was her response that saved us from a potentially dangerous roadside encounter.

When we arrived at my house, I pulled her on my back and leaped up to my open window. Without glancing around or questioning, she fell to her knees and waited. Jack had trained her well, and I suspected she really needed this kind of direction at times. A controlled structure was probably necessary for both of us at this point.

From across the room, I watched her as I removed everything except my jeans. Love filled me, but there was still anger simmering beneath the surface. When I felt in control, I padded over to her silently. Reaching down, I wrapped the pearls around my hand, giving a slight upward tug. "Stand up, Isabella."

An involuntary tremor shook her body, and I put a finger under her chin, lifting her face to me. I leaned in next to her ear and whispered, "Are you afraid, Isabella?"

"No."

I laughed softly. "What a ridiculous question. You'd never admit it anyway." Placing my hand around the soft skin of her delicate neck, I informed her, "I'm going to tie you to the bed, Isabella."

Immediately, there was a change in her; she went from aroused to scared in a split second, and I could sense the panic welling inside her. I saw a tear slide down her cheek, and I kissed it away gently. "Look at me." Our eyes met, and there seemed to be warring emotions in hers. Part of her still seemed aroused, but another was frozen by complete panic. What did she think I was going to do to her? "What's wrong? You know you can tell me anything." I longed for her to be open with me so I would know how to proceed.

"Please don't tie me up," she whispered breathlessly, and I could see in her eyes that she hadn't meant to say it out loud.

"Why?"

"I'm just not comfortable being so out of control."

Bullshit.

"Jack never tied you up?" I called her bluff.

She appeared to be cornered. Izzy didn't like to lie, and I didn't think she would lie to me. "Please..." she begged. So Jack did tie her up; she just didn't want me to. She wasn't about to disclose the reasons, so I would proceed and see what happened.

With our gazes locked, I backed her slowly toward the bed and let go of her neck, undressing her down to her bra and panties. Tipping her face up to mine, I caressed her lips with mine. My hard-on, down to a dull roar for the past while, sprang to life, pushing painfully against my jeans. "Open to me, Isabella," I murmured against her lips. Her mouth opened beneath mine, and my tongue teased against hers. My dick twitched again, and I slid my hands around her waist and pulled her up against me, my tongue plundering her mouth. A small whimper escaped Izzy, and I started tracing a finger along the top of her breasts. I could feel her nipples straining against the lace as my finger grew dangerously close, but I made sure not to give her the contact she wanted yet.

I instructed her to lie on the bed, and then I moved to the other side of the room, grabbing the silken ties I planned to use. Her heart was beating hard when I stood beside her again. "Relax, Isabella." I sat on the side of the bed, bringing my mouth down on hers roughly. Anger surged through me again as I thought of Riley and my frustration that Izzy seemed to be afraid of what I was going to do to her. I wanted nothing more than to just enjoy her and be a normal couple—well, as normal as a vampire/human couple gets.

Without any other part of our bodies touching, I continued to kiss her deeply, my tongue delving into her sweet mouth over and over again. There was something extremely erotic about being connected to her only by our lips and tongues. Pulling back from the kiss elicited a whimper from Izzy, but she remained still.

"You want me to touch you, don't you?"

"Yes, Mr. Cullen."

"I want to touch you, Isabella... all over," I whispered, and her heart rate spiked. "There is the matter of Riley, though."

Izzy stiffened slightly; something a human wouldn't have been able to discern. She opened her mouth to speak, but I placed my finger on her lush lips. "Don't speak. Listen." I growled, straddling her body. I wanted nothing more than to drop pretenses and take her now, but I knew that it wouldn't be in a controlled way, and I refused to do anything that might put her in danger. Her eyes lit on the silk ties in my hand and grew wide with fear. "Don't be afraid, Isabella. You know I would never harm you," I reassured. And I wouldn't. I would do anything for her, anything to protect her—even from myself.

I tied her left wrist to the bed, and she restrained herself from making any objection even though I know she was frightened. Picking up her right wrist, my eyes lit on the leather cuff she wore—a non-verbal symbol of our love and commitment—and I couldn't bear to tie it down. Instead, I brought it to my lips and kissed the creamy skin on the underside of her wrist before placing it on the bed untied. I gazed deeply into her eyes, willing her to understand the things I couldn't say.

I moved to the end of the bed and slowly bound her ankles. Her legs were spread wide, and I had the urge to rip her panties right off—patience, Edward. I poised at the foot of the bed, looking down at her with unbridled lust. I waited until the anger that simmered under the surface was in control before kneeling on the bed and stalking slowly up her body until mine hovered as close to hers as I could get without touching. The current that always ran hot between us was crackling and jumping as though the very cells of our bodies were communicating, craving each other.

I could tell she felt it, too, and her eyes slipped closed. "Eyes open, Isabella. Keep them on me," I instructed.

After an inner struggle, she opened her eyes. I knew this was difficult for her, but she had no idea how hard this was for me, too.

"You may answer when I ask you a question, but no speaking out of turn. If you're a good girl, I'll reward you. If you're bad, the non-touching will go on. Are we clear?"

"Yes, Mr. Cullen."

"What do you think you're doing with Riley?" My question was meant to throw her off, and it did its job; Izzy's eyes widened slightly, clouding over with confusion.

"What? I'm not doing anything with Riley."

To make my point, I wrapped Riley's pearls around my fist. "If nothing's going on with Riley—if he doesn't expect something to be going on—then why is he trying to mark his territory? Why did he give you these?"

"Edward -"

"Isabella, you forget yourself," I reminded, and to her credit, she shifted back into sub mode quickly.

"I'm sorry, Mr. Cullen. Riley was just joking around with me—he said that I was too much of a hard-ass, and he thought a strand of pearls might soften my look. Pearls aren't really my thing, and I told him so, but he insisted that the contrast between my viper bites, black hair and clothing choices would be striking with the pearls—make people wonder. Anyway, it's just a set of plastic beads. I promise you there's nothing between me and Riley; I thought you trusted me."

Unable to look into her vulnerable gaze, I bent down and sliced through her bra, sending the lacy bits off to either side of her. I stared hungrily at her straining nipples, flicking one lightly with my tongue. It took all I had not to close my mouth over her breast and suck, but I remained determined to play things out as I'd decided—it was as much for my benefit as hers.

I raised my head, looking into her dilated pupils. "For someone who's so suspicious of everyone's motives, you really are naïve, Isabella. Firstly, those are real pearls; a strand that long is quite expensive, I assure you—not that a drug dealer can't afford nice things. Secondly, if you think that Riley—a vampire—isn't trying to stake his claim, to woo you away from me, then you're sadly mistaken."

Izzy's eyes were glazed over, and I knew that I was throwing a lot of sensations at her at once. I did this in an attempt to break down some of the barriers she'd so carefully constructed around herself. She appeared to be thinking hard before finally responding, "I don't understand all this 'claiming' and 'marking territory' stuff. You know, James said something like that to me when he bit me—that he was marking me as his, that he would be back for me, and that I belonged to him. That was about as romantic as a dog pissing on a fire hydrant. As long as I know I can be with someone by my own choice, I'm fine, but try to tell me I have to be there, and I'm fucking gone."

In human terms, what happened to me then would be described as 'my blood running cold,' but since I'm a vampire, an imperceptible shudder went through me. My eyes would always give me away, and I saw some semblance of recognition in Izzy's. I really couldn't afford for her to sense fear in me; she needed to be sure of me even though I wasn't sure of myself right now. Thinking it unwise to look into her eyes any longer, I bent my head to her other breast, sucking the hardened bud into my mouth and swirling my tongue around it.

"I told you before, Isabella, I don't like to share." My voice was gravelly, and I bit back a feral growl as the strand of pearls snapped in my hand, shooting off in every direction. "I've never looked at you as an object, but I did warn you about my vampire nature. I'm possessive, I get jealous easily, and I don't like that filthy drug dealer trying to get his slimy hands on you." This time, I couldn't hold back the growl, and Izzy's eyes grew wide.

"You're not sharing me, E - Mr. Cullen. It's so hard for me to be with anyone, to answer to anyone... but I've never lied to you, and I never will. I didn't know the pearls were real or that they meant something more than what Riley said. Look in my eyes; you know I don't want anyone else." I knew it took an effort for her to keep her eyes on mine, and despite her struggle against it, the tears that filled her eyes spilled over. They ran down her face in rivulets, and I smelled them, and I felt like they were mine—the ones I could never cry.

It was more than I could bear, watching her cry as her eyes implored me to believe in her. I was the only fraud in this room, and I could no longer stand to be under scrutiny because I was scared to death of what she might see. "Shh... it's okay." My lips traveled over her face lightly, dropping kisses on her soft skin. "Please, Izzy..." I don't think I spoke loud enough for her to hear; I was so scared I'd say something incriminating. Fear shot through me, and I knew if I lost her that I would be a mere shell of myself. The loss of a mate was the most devastating event that could happen to a vampire. We had no data on a vampire mating with a human—perhaps I was important to Izzy, but she might be able to go on without me, whereas I would not be all right without her.

My mouth came down on hers, my tongue delving into her luscious mouth. I kissed her slowly, pouring passion into it, while keeping my eyes shut tightly—as if it would make my torment any less to close my eyes to it. As our tongues danced together and our lips moved, I started to lose myself in her, forgetting how much pain was coursing through me just a moment ago. Izzy moaned softly, and I smelled the musky scent of her arousal all around me.

"Close your eyes," I whispered.

After her eyes fluttered closed, I sat there watching her for a few minutes, enjoying the fact that I could stare to my hearts content without her inquiring gaze penetrating into my blemished soul. My gaze traveled over her creamy skin, settling on her beautiful breasts with their dusky rose peaks standing at attention. Unable to resist, I leaned in and kissed each nipple before kissing my way in between them and moving down toward her navel. My fingers lightly traced the scars along her ribcage where she used to cut herself, and her entire body stiffened.

"Shh... relax. You don't need to hurt yourself anymore, remember? The scars are healed, and they never have to be opened up again." I could feel the war being waged within her at my words, but, slowly, the tension melted from her body, showing her trust in me. "That's it. Keep your eyes closed, and let it all melt away," I whispered.

Dragging my tongue lightly around her belly button elicited a strong reaction, and I knew I'd found yet another 'special spot' of hers, which I cataloged away for future reference. Moving down to her ankle, I licked and nipped my way up her leg until her sex was just inches from my flaring nostrils as I drank in her heady scent. Knowing she expected me to move down to the other ankle, I put my mouth right over her panties. "Mm-mm." I felt her stiffen beneath me, but she restrained herself.

"I hope these aren't your favorite..." I said huskily, shredding her panties and exposing her to me. "God, you're so wet, Isabella. Do you want me?"

"Yes, Mr. Cullen. So much," Izzy whimpered.

It was all I needed to hear. I delved into her wet heat, laving her with my tongue. At times, I drew it back until I was barely touching her at all, and at others, I plunged it inside her.

"May I come, Mr. Cullen?" she asked breathlessly.

Lifting my head, I looked up, but her eyes remained closed. "Not yet. I'll tap your hip three times when you're allowed to come, since my mouth will be... otherwise engaged."

"Yes, Mr. Cullen."

My tongue snaked out and teased against her little bundle of nerves before delving into her again. I could feel the tension in her body as she tried to follow instructions and hold out until I gave her the signal. She'd done so well, so I decided to reward her. I tapped her hip—one... two... three, and she exploded beneath me. Her body quivered and shook, and when she screamed out my name, I could tell she had no choice in the matter. She screamed my name over and over again as she came, writhing on the bed under my lips and tongue. "Fuck, Edward... oh, my God!"

As I slid up her body, her eyes opened, and I captured her with my heated gaze. Hearing her cry out for me with such abandon melted my insides, and I wanted to bury myself inside her as my erection strained harder than ever at the seam of my jeans. A small part of me felt extremely guilty for drawing so much out of her when I was unable to reciprocate in kind with such complete honesty.

"I'm sorry," she whispered.

I wasn't sure what she was apologizing for, but I was the guilty one; I was the one who should be saying sorry. Instead of telling her any of what was in my troubled mind, I said, "I want you."

"I'm yours, Mr. Cullen."

Shaking my head, I told her, "Not like this. I want you, Izzy; I need you."

"What can I do, Mr. Cullen?" Her eyes held confusion, and it was no wonder—how could she know of the malignancy that was welling up within my blackened soul right now? I couldn't chance telling her everything yet; Alice warned me strongly against it, and I was selfish enough to do whatever I could to keep her as mine.

"No more Mr. Cullen today," I whispered. "I just want you—smart mouth and all." My mouth came down over hers roughly, and I reached up to loosen the silk binding around her wrist, entwining my fingers in hers. She trusted me so completely, and I couldn't shake the voice in the back of my mind that worried she could never feel as much for me as I did for her.

When we came up for air, Izzy stroked my cheek, a concerned look on her face. "Edward, what is it? What's wrong?"

"Nothing, love." I tightened my fingers in hers before moving to the end of the bed to untie her legs and then stood up to rid myself of my jeans. My throbbing erection stood at attention, and she had that naughty spark in her eye that I'd grown to love. Crawling onto the bed, I took her in my arms, turning us on our sides, our flesh pressed tightly together.

"Edward," she whispered, her fingers straying to the hair at the nape of my neck. Attempting to put aside any concerns, I allowed all the love I felt for her to shine in my eyes. Hers told me she loved me, too, even though she couldn't say the words yet. I brought my lips back to hers, tracing my hands up and down her spine and feeling each vertebrae beneath my sensitive fingertips, and I pulled her in tighter against me.

Kissing a sweet path up my neck with her soft lips, she whispered, "I want you, Edward. I've never wanted anyone the way I want you."

Her words held so much meaning because I knew it was so hard for her to admit things to me. Drawing in a breath, I rolled us so I was hovering over her. "I want to make love to you, Izzy." More and more often, she was agreeing to make love, but it was still her choice—I could no longer say no to her.

"Yes, Edward."

Using my knee to spread her legs apart, I entered her slowly, nibbling up her neck and across her jaw until our lips met in a searing kiss. As I starting moving inside her, I pushed my tongue past her lips, feeling the rasp of the viper bites. At first, I was put off by those, but it turned out that I find them kind of hot. All thoughts of viper bites or anything else left me when she moaned, kissing me back with a passion that dragged me in, made me get lost in her. Izzy clawed at my back, pulling my lip between her teeth, and I nearly came right then. There was something about her hot, moist mouth that did me in, so I lifted off her slightly, throwing my head back. Unable to stop myself, my hips rolled faster, and her sighs and whimpers were music to my ears. My eyes were shut tight, and it was the only reason I lasted a little bit longer inside her heat. For the first time, I felt guilty and fearful—so fearful—that I would lose Izzy. Again, the thought that she was not a vampire flitted through my mind. As a human, she was free to leave me at any time, but I would remain bound to her for eternity. The thought of her being with someone else, letting them touch her and make love to her...

"Izzy..." Her name came out in a strangled groan.

"Edward, God."

I realized that I was so trapped in my own private hell that I wasn't paying much attention to Izzy in the present. Dropping my head down, I tasted her skin, running my lips all over her shoulders, neck, and face. Izzy's nails digging into my shoulders brought my attention fully back to her and the fact that her body was writhing beneath mine. Guttural moans stuck in my throat as I forced myself not to scream out that I loved her. She started to call out to me, "Edward... Edward..." saying my name over and over in a litany, and I was drawn over the edge as I felt her walls flutter around me, readying for release.

"Yes... come with me..." I coaxed, thrusting hard a few more times and bringing us both over the edge.

With my body still covering hers, I placed my hand over her heart, and I could feel it still pumping furiously. "Be mine, Izzy. Never leave me." The words slipped out before I could stop them, and I leaned down to kiss her neck so she wouldn't see the look that must surely be in my eyes.

Izzy stroked my hair, and I could smell the fear coursing through her veins—she was definitely on to me. "Yes, Edward. I'm yours; always." Fear seeped into her words, and her heart stuttered.

This was not what I wanted! As Emmett might say, I was acting like an emo pansy. If I couldn't get it together, how could I ever hope to help Izzy? Pulling the comforter up over us to keep her warm, we snuggled until she fell asleep. She never mentioned my behavior while we were making love, and I felt relieved. I'd just have to try harder.

~*0*~

A few days later, Izzy announced her intention to visit La Push. She did it casually as we were driving home from seeing a movie.

"La Push? Why?"

"To visit Jacob and Billy. That place used to be like a second home to me, Edward."

"I don't like it." I shook my head.

"Because of James, or because you're jealous?" she asked matter-of-factly.

"A little of both, I guess. I don't want Paul anywhere near you." I sighed, growling under my breath.

"Paul won't be there; Sam ordered him to stay away."

The trees blurred by faster as my foot came down harder on the accelerator. "So this is all planned out already?" I asked tightly.

"Yes. It is." Her voice was challenging, daring me to object.

I pulled the car to the side of the road, spraying up gravel, and turned to glare at her. "You're goading me, Izzy. Why?"

Her eyes met mine boldly. "You're not my father, Edward. I don't need your permission to do anything!"

"That may be so, but these aren't normal circumstances." Looking through the windshield into the darkness, I pinched the bridge of my nose.

"There's never been anything normal about my life, Edward. I need some time to myself, and I also want to visit the Res—two birds, one stone."

She wanted to be away from me. Perhaps my little display of insecurity the other night had made her feel as though she needed to run. She'd never mentioned it, but I knew I couldn't get it out of my mind.

"You know that my family isn't allowed on the Res, and Alice is unable to see anything when you're around one of them. Why can't Jacob come to visit you?"

"It's not going to go that way, Edward." Izzy's jaw was set.

I grabbed her wrist in my hand, and she turned on me like a viper. "Don't you fucking dare, Edward! Don't cross the line. You know the Dom thing is only for when I need to be snapped in place, but from where I sit, you need to get a fucking grip on yourself!"

Izzy shoved me away, and I let her. She was right—what the hell was I doing? I didn't like the way the argument was going, so I tried to go Dom on her? I rested my head against the steering wheel in an attempt to calm down. Then Izzy just had to jump out of my car and start stalking away... up the shoulder of the 101 in the dark.

In a flash, I was out of the car and in front of her. Izzy gasped at my speed; I usually didn't move like a vampire around her. Before she could blink, I had her pressed up against the side of the Aston Martin. "Where do you think you're going?"

"Away from you," she spat. "Let me go."

"Izzy, it's dangerous out here. We're in the middle of the 101, late at night. James could be lurking anywhere; do you really think I'm going to allow you to put yourself in danger that way?"

Izzy struggled against me, cursing like a sailor. I didn't hear a word she said... I was too busy watching her mouth move as the bulge in my pants grew painfully hard. Her luscious, pink lips... a bit of moonlight glinting off her viper bites... her little, pink tongue peeking out for just a second... I grabbed her face in my hands and mashed my lips against hers. She bit my lip hard, and my dick twitched, pressing up against my jeans. Moving us to the right, I bent her back over the hood of my car, pinning her down.

Suddenly, I smelled the scent of her arousal mingled in with the adrenaline. "What the fuck are you doing, Edward?" she asked breathlessly, her pupils dilating.

I lifted her legs around my hips in answer, running my hand up her naked thigh until I was teasing at her sex through the silky material of her thong. Her heels dug into my ass as she tried to pull me in closer, her hands grabbing at my jacket. I leaned down, licking a trail on her chest from the low cut V of her shirt up to the hollow of her throat. Izzy moaned. "Want you," she mumbled.

I unzipped my pants and shoved her thong aside, hesitating only a moment to be sure it was what she wanted. "Do you want me inside you, Izzy?"

"Yes! Fuck, yes, Edward!"

Supporting her thighs, I pushed my throbbing hardness into her, pumping my hips at a fast clip. She threw her head back, arching her body up. I never knew how hot it could be to see a woman splayed on the hood of your car, knowing another motorist could come along at any moment. I slid one arm under her arched back, pulling her up toward me, and she hooked an arm around my neck, holding on tight. Licking at her viper bites, I teased at her lips until her tongue came out to play. Our tongues flicked against each other lightly outside our mouths as I thrust deeper into her. Izzy's heels dug harder into my ass, egging me on.

"Oh, yes... Edward..." Her soft whimpers drew me toward orgasm. "I'm so close... so close." Her breath heaved in her chest.

I felt the fluttering of her warm heat around my shaft, and I encouraged her, "Yes, that's it. I want to come with you."

"Holy shit, Edward... oh, God!" Izzy threw her head back, and I heard a hollow metal sound as it banged against the hood. I never even had a chance; the sounds she made as she came pushed me over the edge with her.

My body continued to cover hers, and I listened to her heart gradually slow down. I lifted her head slightly so I could cradle the back of it in my cool hands, concerned she might have a bump there. Izzy's legs were wrapped tight around me, as if she didn't want to let me go, and I lifted my head to look into her eyes. "Are you all right?"

Izzy let out a short laugh. "We just totally had hot sex on top of your hood in the middle of the 101, and you ask if I'm all right?"

"You hit your head..." I smirked at her.

"Did I? I must've missed that while you were thrusting inside me." She leaned up and sucked my lip into her hot mouth.

I could see headlights up the road a ways, and I slipped out of her, zipping my pants and pulling her against me as I stood us up. "Careful, Izzy, or we might end up giving a free show to whoever's in that car up the road."

"You think I wouldn't?" Izzy rubbed her hand on my crotch, and my dick sprang to life again. Izzy laughed throatily. "Looks like you're up for it, too."

Pushing her hand away, I led her to the car, opening the door. "Be a good girl and get in the car."

"Being bad is so much more fun..." Izzy pouted.

Indeed.

~*0*~

Saturday dawned cloudy and cold. Izzy stretched her arms above her, rubbing at her eyes. Turning, she flopped with her face in the pillow. "Um... essence of Edward," she mumbled.

"What?"

Her hand flashed out, and she slapped at me. "Don't ruin my morning sniff, huh?"

"Your morning sniff?"

Izzy huffed, lifting her head. "I like to sniff the pillows in the morning—they smell like you."

"But I'm right here."

She rolled her eyes. "Just forget it, boyscout." Then a strange light came into her eyes, and she leaned close to me, capturing my eyes with her playful gaze. "Although, I have to say... you didn't act like much of a boyscout on the hood of your car last night."

My pants tightened at the thought, and I reached for her. I was batted away. "Down, boy... I need a shower, and I have morning breath. Anyway, I need to get ready to..." Her voice drifted off, and the playful mood was broken.

She was referring to her impending trip to La Push. We'd been over that again last night before bed, and I couldn't really defend against the fact that she would be surrounded by werewolves, and that they were capable of keeping her safe.

"I know; you need to get ready to see Jacob. How are you getting there?"

"Jake's picking me up on his bike."

I nearly objected but, instead, decided to follow them on foot until I was sure she was safely on the Res. What she didn't know wouldn't hurt her.

To his credit, when Jacob arrived to pick up Izzy, he was very polite. As she adjusted the helmet on her head, he glanced my way. Don't worry, Edward. I know it's hard for you to allow your mate to be driven away on the back of a werewolf's bike. I promise I won't tell her about the mate thing, and I'll take really good care of her.

I nodded in thanks. Before they left, I kissed Izzy's lips slowly. "I'll miss you today. Be safe."

She smiled up at me. "I'll miss you, too, boyscout. Don't worry about me; I'm in capable paws."

Jacob rolled his eyes.

~*Izzy*~

Edward's lips were on mine, and I could feel the struggle inside him. He wanted to go all caveman on me, but he knew he had no right. In a way, I wasn't so sure of that—Edward Cullen owned my black heart as surely as I owned his golden one.

"I'll miss you today. Be safe," Edward murmured, although I know he wanted to say more.

"I'll miss you, too, boyscout. Don't worry about me; I'm in capable paws."

Jacob snorted good-naturedly, shaking his head as he kicked the bike to life. I felt the rumble between my legs, and all I could think about was getting properly fucked on the hood of Edward's Aston Martin last night.

"Hey, boyscout." Edward looked over at me, and I beckoned him closer so I could put my lips up to his ear. "I had a good time last night. You were so fucking hot. Oh, and I wrote something in the journal for you." I tapped Jacob to let him know I was ready to go.

Edward smiled crookedly at me as Jacob and I took off down the winding drive. A huge chunk of my heart stayed there with him.

When we arrived at La Push, we headed straight toward Jacob's little red house. Suddenly, I was nervous about seeing Billy. After Jacob pulled his bike into the garage, he took my hand in his and peered down at me.

"Be – Izzy, are you okay? I know it's been a long time since you were here, but everyone misses you."

I snorted. "Not Leah."

Jacob showed a flash of his white teeth. "Okay, maybe not Leah, but everyone else does. Sam was really happy to hear you were coming to visit."

"Um, really? Because I thought for sure he'd freak... about Edward."

Jacob pulled on my hand, and we started walking toward the house as we talked. "Sam was a bit... apprehensive at first, but I talked to him. I told him how Edward is with you, and he understands now."

"And Billy? Does he understand?"

"Yeah, he does. What he might not understand is your black hair" —Jacob ruffled my hair playfully— "or your hardware. And for the love of God, please try to watch your potty mouth."

I laughed, but the smile dropped from my face when I thought of Charlie—he must be turning over in his grave seeing me like this. I stopped walking, throwing an arm across my middle at the pain that flared inside me. "Fuck."

"Izzy, you okay?"

"Charlie..." I whispered, tears filling my eyes.

Jacob pulled me into his arms, and I let him. It felt good to be held in his strong, warm embrace—especially knowing that he'd loved Charlie, too. He stroked my hair and rubbed my back, murmuring comforting words.

"Well, isn't this cozy? I wonder what Angela would think." The voice was caustic and rude—fucking Leah.

Jacob and I parted, and I faced away from Leah, wiping my eyes. Taking a deep breath, I faced her. "Leah," I said evenly.

"Oh, and I heard you were so badass now! Aren't you going to tell me to go fuck myself or try to take a swing at me?" Leah pranced around, leaning in perilously close to my face.

Jacob reached out, snatching her up by the waist, and pulled her away from me. "No, you don't, Leah!" Leah's arms and legs swung wildly, trying to hit him, but her dangerous glare never left my face.

Why didn't I curse at her? Why didn't I take a swing at her? Guilt. After Sam imprinted on her cousin Emily and dumped her, she'd lusted after Paul. I had no idea, of course, but that didn't stop her from hating me. If I'd known she wanted Paul, I would have chosen another target. Back then, men were interchangeable for me—a fuck was a fuck. Things had changed drastically for me when I met Edward, but she didn't know that.

"Let me go, Jacob Black! Get the hell off me!" Leah shrieked.

"Behave yourself, or do I need to get Sam to go Alpha on your ass?"

"Fine!"

Jacob put Leah down, watching her warily. We were just outside the house; the rickety front steps were the exact same weathered wood as when we were kids, and I was surprised the porch hadn't fallen down yet. Turning away from the house, I looked Leah in the eye. "Listen, Leah, I know you might not believe this, but I never wanted to hurt you. I had no idea you had a thing for Paul." Her lip curled in a snarl at the mention of his name. "I know the reputation I have, but that's not me anymore. I'm with Edward now, and he's all I want."

Leah spat in the dirt at my feet. "A vampire. Could you throw a bigger insult at all of us?"

"It's nothing to do with any of you. I can't help who I fell for."

Just then the door opened, and Billy's head peaked out. "Bella? Is that you?"

Billy was the only one I would allow to call me Bella; he was Charlie's best friend and the closest thing I had to family. "Yeah, it's me, Uncle Billy."

"Well, get on in here!" His eyes told me he knew very well what was happening out in front of his house.

"Later..." Leah muttered, stalking away.

Jacob and I entered the house, and Billy maneuvered his wheelchair to the shabby little table just outside the kitchen. Billy and I caught up while Jake made us some sandwiches.

"So, Bella, you look really different."

"Yeah... I know." I swiped a hand over my black hair self-consciously.

"It's okay, you know." Billy patted my hand. "No matter what you've had to do to get through, Charlie and I are proud of you."

The tears just started streaming then, and I had no chance of stopping them. I put my head down and sobbed hard while Billy put a comforting hand on my arm. He didn't say a word; he was just there. So many things went through my mind—how I got to where I was, to becoming this hard-nosed, distrustful, sarcastic bitch. My inner banshee had nothing to say, but I could feel my inner Bella stirring with interest. She had nothing to say either, but I felt sympathy from her, and I think she might even have started to understand why I had to do the things I've done in order to survive in this sick world. It wasn't my fault that my mother's boy toy decided to rape me, or that I shot his dick off in self-defense, or that Charlie had gone and died on me before we could come to terms with living together. Most people would have trust issues after what I've been through. The one bright spot in my life was Edward Cullen. The thought of him and his love for me dried my tears, and I lifted my head, using a napkin to blot my eyes.

"I'm sorry about that," I whispered.

Jacob was still tooling around in the kitchen, trying to give me some time to get it together. When I looked up, I met Billy's warm brown eyes, and they were full of sympathy and understanding.

"It's okay, sweetie. You're getting through, and I know you're going to make it. Now... there's the matter of Edward Cullen."

"Um... yeah." I ducked my head, unsure how Billy was going to take my relationship to Edward.

"Jacob tells me that Edward has been really good for you, that he's drawn you out of your shell quite a bit."

"He has, Uncle Billy. He's the best thing that's ever happened to me." I continued to look down, picking at my stubby nails.

"You're well aware of his nature." It was a statement, not a question.

"Yes."

"Has he encouraged you to... turn?" Billy asked carefully.

"No! Not at all. I did ask about it, but he said he'd never even consider it right now. He also promised to stay by my side even if I chose to remain human. He's not a bad vampire—he's the best person I know. I don't even know why he bothers with me, actually."

"I have no problem with the Cullens. They're the only vampires I've ever come across that try to be 'human' and actually go out of their way to help others. It sounds to me like Edward is just what you need. I can't believe I'm saying that myself, but there it is. As far as why he's with you—I'm sure he sees the good in you, just like we do. You're hurting right now and acting out, but deep inside, at your core, you're a good person." He patted my hand.

"So I... have your blessing with Edward?" I asked incredulously.

"You do. I know you'd have Charlie's, too. He was a practical man, and even though he didn't know about werewolves and vampires, I know he would have taken it all in stride. As long as you're working toward healing, you've got nothing to be ashamed of."

"Thank you. You have no idea what this means to me." I swiped away more tears. "Enough about me; tell me about you. What's new here on the Res?"

We ate lunch and talked for a few hours at the little table. It triggered some fond memories of sitting there chatting or playing cards back when I was younger and things were different. I almost felt like Charlie was sitting there, too. It was a very soul cleansing experience, and I felt yet another piece of the puzzle fall into place for me.

"Iz, why don't we take a walk down by the beach? We haven't done that in a few years," Jacob suggested.

"Sounds good."

"Will you be staying for dinner, Bella? We're also having a bonfire tonight, and I'd love it if you'd stay." Billy smiled at me hopefully.

"Yeah, I can stay. It'll be cool to see Sam scarf down a package of hot dogs all by himself again." I smirked.

"Oh, then you're in for a real treat because Jacob here can polish off two packages." Billy wiggled his eyebrows.

My gaze turned to Jacob, and I poked him in the stomach. "Oh, my God. What a pig!"

Jacob ducked his head, his cheeks turning pink under his russet skin. "Come on, let's go." He gestured to the door. "And stop giving away all my secrets, old man!" he chided Billy.

We headed down to the beach, and I bundled myself up as the biting wind cut right through my clothes. Jacob wore only a light wind-breaker over his t-shirt—a handy by-product of being a werewolf—his core temperature ran hot.

First Beach was a place I used to go to daydream and think. I always loved taking my shoes off and allowing the water to run between my toes, but there would be none of that in this bitter cold. There was something about the water that drew me in. I loved to watch the waves crashing onto the beach, the foam rushing up and smoothing out the sand. No matter what you built or wrote in the sand, the surf would always wash it away—like a clean slate. How I wished that real life could give you new chances like that.

Nostalgia filled me as I looked out at the iron gray sky, pregnant with rain. The waves crashed against the rocks and rushed up the sand, and the sound of it affected me deeply. I hadn't been to a beach since my life had gone off track; I'd forgotten the pull it had on my emotions.

"You okay, Izzy?" Jake asked quietly.

"Yeah... just processing stuff."

We walked along the shore, being careful to keep back far enough so the rising tide didn't get our shoes wet. There was a little curve in the rocks just ahead where in another life I would perch on a big, flat rock and think for hours. My pace sped up, and I rounded the corner of the jetty to find... Leah. Apparently, I wasn't the only one who loved that rock.

When she noticed us, she sneered, her lip curling in derision. "Twice in the same day? How did I get so lucky?"

"Sorry, Leah. We didn't mean to intrude."

She merely snorted, turning her gaze back toward the choppy water. Jake just shook his head and motioned that we should continue walking.

We were all rooted to the spot a moment later when the howls of several wolves cut through the air.

Leah snapped to her feet on the rock, turning her head toward Jake, eyes wide. Jake stiffened, cocking his head to the side and listening to the pattern of the howls.

Jake nodded at Leah, and she immediately phased into her wolf form. Her light gray fur bristled, and she leaped off the rock, kicking up sand with her paws as she landed.

"Vampires," he announced.

"Excuse me?"

"Vampires on our land. Several of them from the sound of it." His face was grim.

"James." I swallowed thickly, suddenly glad I'd slung my little backpack purse over my shoulder when we left Billy's.

Jacob went into pack mode, and I felt the raw power that rippled through him even though he was still in human form. "Leah! You stay here and guard Izzy. I'm going to join the rest of the pack. From the sound of it, the vampires have breached the border of our land along the woods."

Leah yipped at Jacob, shaking her gargantuan head.

"That wasn't a request, Leah! You'll be getting the Alpha command in about thirty seconds. Don't delay me, or someone might get injured while we're here arguing!"

Leah whined, but nodded her head. Jacob started running and phased in mid-air; he was quite a sight to behold, and I wondered why he'd never taken his rightful place as Alpha of the pack.

"Well, I guess we can't have any girl talk while we wait." I snickered. "It's just as well; I don't think I want to hear what you have to say to me. I do want to say one thing to you though... I never meant to hurt you. I know we've never been friends, but if I'd known you were interested in Paul, I never would have -"

Leah leaned over and snarled, her hot breath blowing back the hair from my face. I guess she wasn't up for listening.

"Sorry, sorry." I held up my hands.

Leah paced back and forth along the sand, creating a deep groove. She whined a few times, and cocked her head to the side once. At one point, her eyes snapped to mine, and she looked startled.

"Is everyone okay?"

Her head nodded, but she continued to stare hard at me.

"What the fuck are you staring at?"

Whining again, she lay down and put her head in her paws. She almost looked dejected. Every so often, we'd hear a howl of triumph, and I thanked God that the pack was winning the battle. The thought of calling Edward crossed my mind, but I knew better—he'd breach the treaty line in a second to get to me. Alice would have no idea what was happening over here because she couldn't see me near the wolves. What they didn't know wouldn't hurt them.

Suddenly, Leah stopped pacing, and a deep growl rumbled low in her throat. My eyes sought out hers, but my knees felt weak when I saw where her gaze was riveted—out in the water behind me. Whirling around, I saw James walk right out of the surf, water droplets rolling off his impermeable skin as though he'd been dipped in Rain-X.

"Holy fuck," I whispered.

"There's nothing holy about any of this, I assure you." James smiled widely, showing me his sharp teeth. His leather jacket and faded denim jeans were soaked, and water streamed from his clothing as he strode forward confidently.

Leah snarled, jumping in between us. James threw his head back and laughed loudly. "Oh, dear. The family pet is trying to protect you? Here kitty, kitty." His mocking voice incited Leah to action, which is exactly what he was waiting for.

Leah leaped at James, and he leaned to the side, slamming his fist into her head as she passed him. With a yelp of pain, Leah fell to the ground unconscious.

Before I could get my hand into my purse, James was standing right in front of me with his hand on my throat. Edward always made an effort to act more human around me, so I tended to forget how swiftly a vampire could move.

"So here we are. Surely you didn't think I'd let you get away from me." James' voice was soft, rough and threatening. His fingers tightened on my throat, and he tilted his head to the side, looking me over as though I was a bug stuck in his web that he was contemplating the best way to dig into.

"Let me go!"

"Afraid not, sweet thing. You belong to me now." James leaned in close and kissed my lips. I tried to turn my head away, but the grip he had on my neck prevented any movement. He plunged his tongue into my mouth, exploring roughly. With the fingers of his other hand, he caressed my neck where Edward had marked me, but his face changed suddenly, and he looked down. "What... the... fuck? He dared to mark you? He thinks sinking his teeth in your neck after me means he can stake a claim?" His angry crimson eyes burned into mine.

"I'm not yours; I'm his."

"NO! You're not his, you little slut! You'll fuck anything with legs!" James screamed in my face.

"No."

"Did you fall in love, Izzy? How quaint; the little whore finding redemption. Too bad you still have to pay for your past transgressions."

There was a snarling sound behind me, and James looked up with amusement. "Oh, a bigger family pet here to try and save you. What have you done to inspire loyalty on the Res, Izzy? Did you fuck your way through this pack of dogs, too?"

James turned me around, and I saw Paul edging his way closer; his charcoal fur was standing on end, his teeth bared.

"Stand-off, asshole. If you get too close, I'll take her head clean off. And then I'll take you down."

Shit. James was right. There was no way anyone could get me out of his clutches alive. I remembered the power I'd harnessed to knock Jasper on his ass, and I wondered why it wasn't coming to my aid now. If ever there was a time for it to work, this would be it.

"Now, where were we?" James whispered in my ear as he pulled my back against his front so we were both facing Paul. I could feel his erection pressing into my ass, and I was disgusted. "So here's the plan. When we get away from here, I'm planning a suck and fuck. I'm going to suck on your blood while I fuck you. Then I'm going to do it again. And again. When you're an empty husk, I'll return your body to your beloved Edward. While he's grieving with disbelief, I'm going to tear him limb from limb and have myself a nice little campfire. How's that sound to you?"

All that he said took a few moments to fully register. He wasn't going to let Edward go—ever. He wanted to kill me and torture Edward with it. Fuck no! "No! James, I'll go with you, but leave Edward out of this!"

"No can do." James ground his hips against my ass. "I can't wait to get started." His lips grazed my ear, and something slimy skittered up my spine and took residence in my heart.

My mind immediately focused on Edward. How much I loved him, and the fact that I never told him so. The thought of dying without Edward knowing I loved him was too much; it was the straw that broke the camel's back. There was no way I was letting James hurt Edward that way. I threw my head back and let out a blood curdling war cry. "FUCK YOU, JAMES!" A sound came out of me that sounded inhuman, and the raw power that had surged through me when I'd felt cornered by Jasper unleashed itself, billowing out of me like a huge force field. James was blown back into the water, and I fell to my knees. Paul was on him in a second.

I rested on my hands and knees, too weak to move, and my long hair hung like a curtain around me. Stray wisps blew into my face as the punishing wind continued raging. I couldn't even look up to watch the battle between Paul and James. With my head down, all I could see was the sand between my hands. My entire body trembled, and I started to see little pricks of light at the edges of my vision and knew I was in danger of passing out. I closed my eyes tight, trying to get a handle on myself, but the adrenaline that was shooting through my system caused the tremors to increase. Opening my eyes, I looked down at the grains of sand curiously. Something wasn't right; part of the sand was red. I cocked my head, trying to make sense of what I was seeing when a drop of red hit the sand... and then another. It was me; I was bleeding. Sitting back on my knees, I raised my hand to swipe at my face, and it came away with smears of red. My nose was bleeding, but I didn't remember bumping it.

Suddenly, my cocoon of shock was shattered by snarls and the slap of water. Looking up, I saw James and Paul deep in battle in the surf. Paul had ripped into James' forearm, which was partway detached but healing rapidly. James sniffed at the air, nostrils flaring, and his head whipped my way as the scent of my blood reached him. He smiled. "Can't wait, baby. You smell delish. Just going to take care of this dog, and then we can get out of here."

Coming out of my stupor, I remembered my secret weapon. When I'd fallen to the ground, my purse had rolled a few feet away, but it may as well have been a few miles; my bones had turned to jelly, and there was no way I was getting up. I crawled toward the purse slowly while the battle raged on behind me. I wondered where the fuck the rest of the pack was and prayed that they would get here before it was too late. Fumbling my purse open, I reached around until my hand found what I was looking for. My fingers slid around the cool metal, and relief flooded through me—at least I had a fighting chance now.

Suddenly, James let out a mighty yell, and I looked up just in time to see him ram his entire forearm—up to the elbow—into Paul's side. Paul howled in pain as James started digging inside him.

"Stop!" I screamed out. "James, look at me, you sick fuck!"

He continued digging around Paul's insides as the wolf continued to howl in agony, unable to get free. James turned his face my way, a sadistic smile playing about his lips. "What is it?"

"This!" I took aim and shot James in the chest with the flare gun that I held in both hands. "Burn, motherfucker, burn!"

The flare lodged just inside James' jacket, and as it bloomed into flame, his skin started to burn. He removed his arm from Paul's side, batting at himself in an attempt to put out the flames. A horrid metallic shrieking poured from his mouth, and I covered my ears.

Paul lumbered over to me, bleeding profusely from the gaping wound in his side. His large nose nudged at my arm, and he lay down on his belly, turning his pained gaze on me.

"Paul, thank you. I'm so sorry."

Paul nudged me again, tossing his head back and giving me a meaningful look.

"You want me to get on your back?"

His head nodded, and he nudged me harder. Looking toward the water, I saw no sign of James and realized his shrieking had stopped. That meant there was a chance he might have put the flare out in the water and could be after us again at any moment. I heard howls in the distance, but they were still some distance away.

Using all the strength I could muster, I clambered onto Paul's back, grabbing thick tufts of his fur in my fists and clamping my legs as snugly as I could over his body. "Go!"

Paul whined in pain as he started loping up the beach. I was afraid to know how much damage James had done, but I prayed that there wasn't too much, that he'd be able to heal. When Paul got to the tree line, he hesitated, as if unsure of which way to take me.

"Edward," I mumbled. "You have to take me to Edward."

Paul snarled.

"Please, Paul. I need Edward. If you ever cared about me at all, bring me to Edward."

Paul hesitated for a second, his head swinging one way and then the other, before taking off into the woods. I held on for dear life; I was too weak to talk anymore, and I had no choice but to put my life in Paul's hands.

~*Edward*~

It was hard to watch Izzy riding away from me on the back of Jacob Black's motorcycle. Then again, I raced like the wind through the woods, following them until I was sure Izzy was safely on the Res.

Once I was satisfied that Izzy was in good hands, I went hunting, quickly taking down two deer. I was anxious to get back to the house, so I could read what Izzy had written in the journal for me. So far, I'd only had a chance to read a few entries. It was painful to read the early ones from when she was still seeing Jack. I'd decided to go through it slowly and savor it, knowing just how much progress we'd made.

When I entered my room, Alice was sitting on my bed, pouting. Her golden eyes sought out mine, and they were anxious. "What is it, Alice? Have you seen something?"

"No, no. I'm just upset because I can't see Izzy when she's with the wolves. She's become like a sister to me, and I don't like it when I feel disconnected from her."

I smiled crookedly. "News flash, Alice: I hate it more than you do. It nearly killed me to let Jacob Black ride away with her on his motorcycle. Of course, I followed them all the way to the Res..."

"I know; I saw you once you left to hunt. Edward, is everything okay between you two?"

"Yes. We did have a little spat last night, but it ended... quite agreeably." I smirked.

"I'm not even going to ask. If it's what I started to see alongside the 101..." Alice held up her hand.

"Alice, I need a little time to myself. Izzy wrote something in the journal for me, and she wanted me to read it while she was gone."

"Sure. I'll catch you later." Alice hugged me around the middle before leaving the room.

Retrieving the journal, I settled on my couch to read, flipping the pages until I found the most recent entry.

Dear Edward,

I know it was hard for you to let me go to the Res today. Despite the fact that I'm always telling you I can do whatever I please... the truth is, I don't want to upset you unnecessarily. My heart belongs to you now, boyscout—even when I don't act like it. It was very difficult for me to accept you into my life, and now you're so important to me that it leaves me vulnerable—and, frankly, that scares the shit out of me.

I think you know this, but I want to repeat it again: I don't want anyone but you. I would never let Riley or any other man come between us. That Izzy doesn't exist anymore... The last few times I was with Jack, all I did was cry my fucking eyes out. Jack is wonderful, but I hated every minute of his hands on me just the same. Your hands, your lips... those are the only ones that I'll ever want on me again. Believe it. Believe it, or I'll kick your ass, you hear me?

Last night was just... wow. Feel free to get rough with me on the hood of your car any time. That was so hot. I don't know... we might have to find you a new nickname—boyscout suits you less and less each day. See... I've corrupted you. You seem to be enjoying it though, you perv, so I guess it's okay. Anyway, this is a bit sappy for my tastes. You're turning me into a fucking pansy, Edward.

I'll see you soon. I hope you can read between the lines and know what you really mean to me.

Izzy

A smile flitted over my face. This was pretty sappy for Izzy, but I loved it. Her defenses were slowly coming down, and she'd finally accepted me into her life. On some level, she had to know we were mates—whatever she might call it; the pull was too strong to ignore.

That's why when I felt a pain wrench inside my chest, I knew something was terribly wrong.

"Alice!" I called out hoarsely.

Alice was at my door in a flash with her eyes wide. "What is it?"

"You have no sense of Izzy yet?"

"No. Should I?"

"Well, I do. Alice, I have a gripping pain in my chest—I know it's her." The pain was nearly debilitating, and I had a hard time standing up straight. Fishing my phone out of my pocket, I called her cell.

Her voicemail picked up on the third ring, 'Hey, it's Izzy... I'm busy causing a ruckus somewhere. Leave me a message... entice me to call you back. Later.'

"Izzy, it's Edward. Please call me back the minute you get this—something isn't right." I slammed my phone shut. "Damn it!"

"Edward, you don't know what it is..."

"Yes, I do. I'm telling you, something's wrong."

Calls to Jacob's cell and Billy Black's home were fruitless. A horrible feeling continued to descend over me, and I decided to go to the Res—treaty be damned.

"Oh, Edward, what are you thinking?" Alice shook her head.

"Fuck the treaty," I spat.

The problem was, with this pain in my chest, I didn't think I was going to be very useful. Suddenly, Jasper was standing by the door. "I'll go with you, Edward."

"No!" Alice cried.

"Don't worry, Darlin'; we'll be okay."

"Then I'm coming, too." She crossed her arms, and her mouth was set. Jasper didn't even bother to argue with her.

The three of us rushed to the front of the house to decide on a course of action, but it turned out that it wasn't necessary. In the distance, I heard someone approaching; someone that was sending out a beacon of distress in their mind—pain beyond anything I've ever witnessed.

Fuck me. I have to get her to him. Fucking bloodsucker. God damn it; I don't know if I'm going to make it. Is she even—fuck! It hurts so bad! The flow of thoughts stopped as blinding pain hit him, and a pained howl echoed close by in the woods.

Jesus. It was a wolf.

"Alice, Jasper! There's a wolf headed this way—an injured one. Maybe he'll have answers."

Nothing could have prepared me for the site of Paul limping out of the woods with Izzy splayed on his back. There was blood everywhere, and I quickly noted a gaping hole in Paul's right side.

"Dear God," Alice gasped.

Jasper's mouth hung open.

"Izzy!" I cried out. I could hear the comforting sound of her heart beating, and it was strong and steady. Thank you, God.

"Edward..." her voice was a mere whisper on the wind. "Need you."

As I drew closer, I realized Paul wasn't the only one bleeding; the tang of Izzy's blood was in the air. I stood in front of Paul, unsure if he was going to give me a problem or not. His mind was swirling with nonsensical thoughts and images.

"Paul?"

Edward, take her. Hurry... I think I'm dying. Everything's getting dim...

Paul started to topple, and I was afraid he would land on Izzy, crushing her body. I moved around the side of him quickly, catching her in my arms as he fell to the ground with a loud boom. His heart was still beating, albeit sluggishly.

"Get Carlisle! He's got to come home now!" I ordered.

Alice sprang into action, dialing Carlisle at the hospital from her phone.

My attention turned to Izzy hanging limply in my arms. She was deathly pale, and there were twin tracks of blood running from her nose. Her eyes appeared to be having trouble focusing. "Edward," she whispered. "I need Edward."

"I'm right here, baby. You're in my arms."

Her hand came up slowly, feeling over my face, and she leaned her head into the crook of my neck and breathed in. "Oh, God, yes." Her lips moved against my skin. "I thought I'd never see you again..." Then the tears started, and Izzy sobbed quietly, and I think it's because she was too weak to do anything more drastic.

I sank to the ground, cradling her in my arms. "It's okay; I've got you. I'm never letting you out of my sight again." I smoothed back her hair, which was a snarled mess. She kept her face buried in my neck, her left hand fisting my shirt. "Izzy, what the hell happened?"

"James," she whispered. "I just couldn't allow it; I couldn't. Had to stop him."

"AHHHHHHHHH!" A blood curdling scream came from Paul, who had now phased back to his human form and was writhing on the ground naked. There was a gaping hole in his side, and fresh blood poured out. "Fuck me! Fuck, fuck, fuck!"

Izzy lifted her head for the first time. "Paul? Is that Paul?"

"Yes; can't you see him? He's right there."

"No," she whispered. "I can barely see, Edward."

"What? Why?"

"I don't know; just like I don't know why my nose is bleeding. I'm scared, Edward." She gripped my shirt tighter, clinging to me for dear life.

"Don't be scared, love. If I have to, I'll change you. I won't let anything happen to you; I promise."

"You would do that?"

"Yes. I'd do anything for you. Anything." I pressed my lips to her temple.

"Paul saved my life. If it wasn't for him, I would be dead. Is he going to be all right?"

"Alice?" I looked up.

"I can't see him, Edward, but Carlisle's on his way. We can't take Paul to a regular hospital; not the way the way the wolves heal."

"AHHHH! Shit! My fucking insides are going to fall out. I'm going to die here," Paul moaned, squirming on the ground. "Kill me... please. Just end this. The fucking pain!"

Jasper crouched next to Paul and spoke to him quietly. "Paul, I can help you with the pain if you want. I might not be able to get rid of all of it, but I can help ease your suffering."

"Do it! Fuck!" Paul screamed again.

Jasper's eyebrows furrowed with concentration, and slowly, Paul's screams subsided, and his body stilled.

Izzy looked up at me a moment later, a wry smile on her pale face. "Hey, boyscout."

"You can see me now?"

"Yeah. You're so beautiful, Edward." She reached a hand up to caress my cheek. With my enhanced vision, I could see some blood behind her eyes when I looked deep inside them. Carlisle would need to examine Izzy in addition to Paul. He'd probably want to do a CT scan on her.

"No, you're beautiful. God, Izzy, you scared me to death." I hugged her tighter against me.

Izzy stiffened in my arms. "Edward, I'm not feeling too good," she whispered. Then she looked up at me, grabbing my face between her hands. "I can't let this go on. You have to know the truth before something happens to me..."

"Izzy, calm down. Nothing is going to happen to -"

"Shut up, boyscout! I have something I need to say."

"What is it, love?" I stroked her hair, looking down into her eyes.

Izzy still held my face between her hands, and her eyes searched mine for a moment. "Edward, I... love you." And then her hands went slack, her eyes rolled back, and her head drooped as she slipped away.

A/N: So... what do we think? Izzy finally said the words. I know a lot of you have been waiting for that! I have been, too.

'I Want It Painted Black' and its characters have been nom'd in a number of categories of the Walk of Fame Awards. 'I Saw You Coming' has been nom'd for a Coven Empress Award for best vamp centered fic, and Yours Truly is up for a Rising Starlet award. Thank you so much to those who nom'd me! Take a look and vote for your faves.

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