Author's Notes: Just taking the characters and song out to play.
To recap: September: Olivia and Elliot dance at the Ball
October: Elliot tells Olivia he is taking leave
November: Still no news of Elliot for Olivia – the captain knows though.
December: Christmas came and went, still no Elliot.
January: Stefan has his own ideas about their case and he and Olivia end up shot.
February: Olivia's recovery is assisted by a visit from Elliot.
March: Desk bound thanks to Cragen, Olivia realises she's was the only one who doesn't know the truth
April: Olivia is investigating and when she can't do it from work, she takes leave.
May: Olivia has a friend in Dean Porter who gets to the truth and gets Olivia to Elliot.
Thanks for the great reviews – much appreciated.
June
Maybe it's intuition
but some things you just don't question
Like in your eyes, I see my future in an instant
And there it goes,
I think I found my best friend
I know that it might sound
more than a little crazy
but I believe...
I knew I loved you before I met you
I think I dreamed you into life
I knew I loved you before I met you
I have been waiting all my life
There's just no rhyme or reason
Only the sense of completion
And in your eyes, I see
the missing pieces I'm searching for
I think I've found my way home
I know that it might sound
more than a little crazy
but I believe...
I knew I loved you before I met you
I think I dreamed you into life
I knew I loved you before I met you
I have been waiting all my life
A thousand angels dance around you
I am complete now that I've found you
I knew I loved you before I met you
I think I dreamed you into life
I knew I loved you before I met you
I have been waiting all my life
After taking a few days to finalise her thoughts and the details of the case, Olivia decided on her next step. Taking advantage of the first day of June, she walked into the Precinct at 4:00pm and headed upstairs, knowing there were many, many eyes on her.
Without stopping for well-wishers or colleagues, Olivia went straight to Don Cragen's office and knocked on his door.
"Enter," he called and Olivia drew a deep breath, stealing herself for the card she was about to play. To her advantage, John, Fin and Stefan were already in there, she smiled at her luck.
"Liv!" Fin jumped up from his chair and embraced her. "Where have you been? You looked relaxed."
"I managed to get away for a few weeks," she replied. It wasn't a lie, she had been away, by a few miles but still away.
"Liv, welcome back," said John, kissing her cheek. "You are back?" He looked at her over his dark glasses. Olivia smiled but gave no answer; much would depend on how this meeting panned out.
Don came from behind his desk and gave her a warm hug, he was both pleased and surprised to see her here in this office. "Liv, I'm very glad to see you. You had me worried disappearing like that!"
"I didn't mean to worry you Don, just felt like a change of scenery," Olivia said quietly.
"Hi there partner," Stefan said, patting her arm and feeling uncomfortable with the level of affection being displayed. "Glad to see you back."
Fin ushered her into his chair before making excuses for their departure but Olivia put her hand on his arm and stopped him.
"No Fin, John, I'd like you to stay. There are a few things I need to say and I'd rather you all be here at the same time." Olivia said in a quiet, reserved manner.
'Sure," Fin mumbled.
Soon all were seated or standing ready in anticipation of what Olivia might say. She looked at their faces, all earnest to understand what this meeting was about.
With a heavy sigh she started. "Well, I've been doing a lot of thinking in my six weeks or so I've been away and…" she paused, more for a dramatic effect than need for a break. "And I've also been doing a little research…" She noted Don's eyes opening a little wider.
"On…" John said.
"On…on a few things actually," she said.
"Find anything interesting?" Fin asked. Olivia gave him a half smile and noted neither Don or Stefan had spoken.
"Yeah, very..." She looked at her boss then at Stefan and back. "I know you've all been lying to me. You all know the truth about Elliot's absence and not one of you has told me." She put on her most hurt and aggrieved expression.
"Liv, what makes you think that?" asked Fin. For the briefest of moments, Olivia thought maybe Fin and John weren't in on the scheme. She decided to go with her first instinct.
"I've watched you – you all and there are things you're not telling me…"
"Olivia, I told you I knew where Elliot was and what he was doing from the beginning, there's been no lie," Don said defensively.
"You never told me th…"
"I don't have to report to you, Detective," he said, standing up. Olivia cringed inwardly, she didn't want to lose this opportunity.
"I know that, sir, and I accept it. You may not have lied per se but you didn't tell me the whole truth, did you?" She looked directly at Stefan.
For several moments there was an uneasy silence, so she continued.
"I don't believe we've met," she said, standing to shake Stefan's hand. Stefan's confusion played across his face and he looked at Don for guidance.
"Um, Olivia, I'm Stefan…your…"
"You are Luke Palosso…you are a private investigator with a sideline is personal protection. I'm guessing you're supposed to be my bodyguard, correct?"
Stefan had no idea what to do next, his identity had been revealed and in an instant everything was jeopardised.
"Olivia, how did you…? Don asked quickly.
"It doesn't matter. What matters is it's the truth and you all knew it! Right?" She looked at Don, then Fin and John and each gave the slightest nod, barely managing to maintain eye contact. "What I want to know is why do I have a bodyguard?"
"Olivia, maybe we should finish…"
"No, Captain, there have been too many lies or secrets, I think everyone should hear the same information," Olivia said.
Don returned to his chair, Stefan shuffled his feet, Fin sat uneasy in his chair and John sat on the edge of the shelf bemused by the entire proceedings.
"What do you want to know, Olivia?" Don finally asked.
"Everything…from the beginning."
"Well, Olivia there are a few things I can't…" Don began, and immediately Olivia's heart went out to him.
"Captain, I respect the position you are in. Why don't I tell you what I know and you can fill in the blanks?"
"Go ahead."
"This is what I know…Elliot came to me on Halloween and said he was thinking of taking leave and the lasting memory of that night was the look of fear in his eyes. His leave was immediate and when he was due to return you told me he'd gotten himself into something and needed time to get out." Don nodded. "Except he's not the one in trouble, is he? Or rather, wasn't at that time, I was the one in trouble, right?" Don nodded again. "When Elliot wasn't coming back, Stefan or rather Luke was put in as my partner. A PI working undercover as a cop is a new one on me, haven't figured that one yet but we'll get to it. So Elliot's MIA, Luke…can I call you Luke?" He nodded and she continued. "Luke, is my new partner and while he has pretty good investigative skills, he police procedure is off and it gets me wondering what they do in Mississippi. Come January we get shot, and February we recover and I get a visit in hospital from Elliot."
Olivia smiled at the shocked looks on their faces, that was something they didn't know. "So back at work in March and I'm on desk duty. Luke is a cold case whiz, must be that PI training, but he reacts badly to one file, the Jessica Palosso file." Instantly she realises they know she knows. She pauses before continuing. "Luke, I'm sorry about your sister."
"Thanks, Olivia…" he muttered, looking decidedly uneasy by the events.
"I haven't quite figured how that relates to me but I'm sure it does. I was a bit uncertain at first but Elliot confirmed it…"
"When he saw you in February?" asked John.
"No, when I visited him in hospital…" she began.
"What?" Fin was on his feet. "What happened?"
A wave of panic swept over Olivia, this news was new to them and Don was punching buttons on the phone like there was no tomorrow. The intended recipient didn't answer and the message left was gruff. "Call me ASAP, got it!!!!"
"Details, Olivia," Don said replacing the receiver.
"Don't have many, sir. I know he was in a car wreck about the 20th of last month. I believe his car was t-boned at an intersection when a car ran a red light. He was critical for a few days but my last report was he was doing much better and was being discharged."
"Report? From whom?" Don asked, pen poised to take more notes.
"Not saying," Olivia replied firmly.
"Did he tell you what he was doing?" asked Fin.
"No, just whatever he was doing – it was for me."
Don tapped his pen a few times as an internal debate raged within. Should he tell Olivia the whole truth, part of the truth or pull rank and say nothing. He decided on the whole truth, minus a few details if he could manage to withhold them, worried about what their effect would be on Olivia is she knew.
"Here it is…" Olivia braced herself, eight months of worry about to be explained. "In October, Elliot was investigating Jeremiah Caracher as the prime suspect in the rape and murder of Elizabeth Gordon." Olivia thought hard, the name had a familiar ring but the case escaped her. "You were in court that week," Don said, noting her confusion. "Anyway, as Elliot got further into the case he came across a Lyle Bennett."
She heard Luke breathe deeply before he spoke. "I've been looking for Bennett for seven years…" he paused. "That bastard murdered my sister." His voice was flat and emotionless.
"How do you know it was him?" asked Fin. He and John had only been told what they needed to know, not the complete story.
"I saw him. He was a gardener at my sister's building. The night she was murdered I called passed and he was coming down her path, agitated with dark splotches down his green overalls. By the time the police got to him the overalls were long gone. No evidence on him or in Jessie's apartment and he walked."
Olivia was surprised by the evenness of his voice, no anger or bitterness, just matter-of-fact.
"I've been on his trail ever since…"
"I still don't get how that comes back to me," Olivia said.
Don scanned the faces in his office before responding. "Luke got a hit on Lyle Bennett when Elliot did a search on him."
"I contacted Elliot," Luke continued, "and we teamed up to go get him but he'd disappeared, again." The disappointment in his voice was evident to all. "We were so close, you know? Hot on his trail. We figured it would only be a short time before we got him."
"But why not tell me?"
"Liv, when Luke and Elliot broke into Bennett's apartment, he had a tribute wall. Jessica's photo's before, during and after her death were up, a handwritten plan of what he was going to do and when it was going to happen…" Don explained. Olivia looked up at Luke, sympathy flooding her heart.
"I'm so sorry," she mouthed. Luke smiled.
"It wasn't just Jessie, Olivia," Luke continued. He had pictures of four other policewomen he has killed since…" Olivia's heart began to race, suddenly she knew where this was going. "As we were going through his stuff we came across his next project…"
"Me?" Olivia asked in barely a whisper.
Don and Luke both nodded.
Olivia stood and went to the window, this wasn't what she was expecting.
"You okay, Liv?" Don asked, resting his hand on her shoulder.
"Yeah," she nodded. "Keep going…"
When no one spoke she prompted further… "How does that get me a bodyguard…"
"I've seen this bastard, Olivia," Luke said, the Mississippi accent fading with each word. "Elliot thought it best if I stay with you, I'd have a better chance of making sure he came no where near you."
"And what's he been doing?"
"He was on his trail. We honestly thought it would only be a short time but the guy's gone underground. Elliot's been hanging out in the same places as Caracher and Bennett used to, hoping he turns up or some info turns up." Luke answered.
"How long is this going to go on?" Olivia asked.
"I don't know," Don said truthfully. "I've tried to recall him three times now, he's used all his rec leave but he vowed not to return until Bennett's in jail and he knows you're safe."
Olivia sat back in the chair and closed her eyes. She had her answers, Elliot had put his life on hold for her, he was doing it for her – acting above and beyond the responsibility one has towards a partner, more like the actions one would do for a lover. It was the instant she realised he loved her as much as she loved him.
"Are you alright?" Fin asked, leaning over to her.
She nodded, not quite sure if she'd be able to speak.
"So, what happens now?" asked John.
"Now," Don said, "I'll get a hold of Elliot and the rest of us can get back to work."
The men all stood but Olivia remained seated.
"You ready to get back to work, Olivia?" asked Luke, his hand resting on her arm.
Olivia shook her head. "Maybe tomorrow then?" asked Luke. Olivia shook her head again and stood.
"I know you all meant well and I appreciate the fact you care so much to do it…but you didn't tell me. You didn't trust me with truth that my life was in danger, you didn't trust my judgment, my ability to look after myself. I can't work with people who don't trust me." She walked out of the office and away from Luke and three men who she once trusted implicitly.
Don sat at his desk and contemplated his next move, perhaps if Olivia knew all the details she would realise the nightmares they were trying to protect her from. For the rest of June he tried to find her but she was gone. Alone, with a murderer after her, Don couldn't protect her. When her request for transfer hit his desk on June 20th he approved it – at least he'd know where to find her.