((The chapter heading is a line from the song Whisper by Evanescence.))

Chapter 10
Fallen Angels at my Feet

The thought had manifested itself in Kalyna's head soon after her return from the Institute. It had just taken a battle against what seemed to be a host of mirelurks for her to realise that not every knot needed the treatment that Alexander had had for the Gordian one. She had to sort her problems. The Institute was the Gordian type, and so, obviously, were mirelurks and the like. But the Brotherhood, which she did consider a problem, might be something else.

After said vicious battle she knew that Preston Garvey was happy that he had Castle back, Danse was as happy as he ever was because he had fought chaos, and Deacon … Deacon was generally suspiciously serene recently. And so Kalyna sat them down, all three of them looking at her. She wished Nick was there. He seemed to have an answer to everything. But this conflict was her problem, not Nick's.

'It's like this,' she said. 'I know we've got reason to celebrate a victory. And we'll do that. But I want you to realise something. We did this together. I'm sure this is replicable.' She had expected some form of answer, but all she got was interested looks. 'God. You're being difficult on purpose. The Commonwealth needs more than one of you. We need someone who looks to the people that get caught between the lines of fire. We need someone who has the firepower to keep the threats down. And we need someone who looks to those that would otherwise be forgotten. I want all of you to think about that, because it will need something to change. You can bring that change to your respective people. Not now, but when our common enemy is gone. What I really don't want is to find any of you pointing weapons at each other next.'

'Is that what your courser does? Help destroy the Institute? You've been gone, and you came back with him. And now you're making speeches that can be understood in a lot of ways. Never mind helping him to get back one of their synths.'

Kalyna rolled his eyes. 'A synth who turned raider controlled Libertalia, Danse. What would you have had me do?'

'Destroy the synth. Not return him to his owners so they can use him again.'

'That's not how espionage works, Dunce.'

'Deacon. I'm begging you.'

'I'm serious. What do you want her to do, Danse? Shoot the courser? Because that would go down really well. She'd be murdered or kicked out before you could say infiltrator. Not that I think you could spell that.'

'You watch your mouth, farm boy. Or is that even what you are? I'm watching you.'

'This,' Preston said in a carrying voice, 'is exactly the problem. Get a grip, for God's sake. If you're trying to impress someone, you're not succeeding.'

'Thanks, Preston. Stop thinking with your glands, both of you.' They looked shocked. 'But thanks for making it clear that it is necessary to tell you the obvious: We need to work together. First against the Institute, and then against whatever threatens the people of the Commonwealth.' She looked at Danse. 'People. All of them. Which is why I've made copies of the tape that Sturges gave me. You all have different angles. We need as many angles as we can get.' She clapped her hands together. 'Now, I think we've got some work to do with this place, don't we?'

Preston stood. 'Yes. Danse, can I borrow you for a moment? I'd like to have your input on some possible fortifications.' The Minuteman winked at her and led the way outside.

'Deacon … wait a moment, please. I'd like to ask you something.'

'Shoot.'

'Are you religious? You don't strike me as the type, but given your alias, I wonder.'

'I … no. That wasn't the reason. And before you ask me why I picked it, this isn't something I'm going to tell you. As in, ever.'

'It wasn't what I wanted to ask anyway. Do you trust me?'

'I believe that you want the best for the Commonwealth, Whisper.'

'Fine. I'll just take that as a no. No, Deacon, don't. I didn't think so anyway.' She sighed. 'I'm going to go back to the Glowing Sea, and I want you to hear why from me and not from anyone else.'

'I could come with you, if you want.'

She looked at him. 'I would have asked you if you'd said yes. But now, I can't. I'm taking Nick. We'll find bombs for the Brotherhood of Steel. They have a large kind of tank-bot that they want to start, and it needs being armed.'

'You can't be serious.'

'Yes. Yes, Deacon, I'm dead serious. If you don't trust me, go to HQ and tell them to keep me locked out. I would never hurt a single one of you, but I have to … I have to do this. In part to play them. In part to give them a weapon that just might be enough to take down the Institute. And in part … Deacon, in part to force you to make up your mind about what kind of person you think I am. Think about it. Hard.'

'Take me with you, Whisper.'

'No.' Kalyna stood. 'You have to talk this out with yourself. You either trust me, or you don't. But you have to make up your mind.'

Ϡ

'Well, I can tell you one thing,' Kalyna said. 'This place won't grow on me.'

'As long as you don't start glowing yourself, it's all right.' Nick sighed. 'This power armour is really something else. No need to point out the time I refused to use it, but I don't have to enjoy myself.'

'I wasn't going to. I never did that, Nick.'

'I know. You had every right to.' They entered the facility the Brotherhood had pointed them to, the door closing behind them. 'You think I can ditch that armour here?'

'We may not leave the way we came.'

Nick chuckled. 'I'm pulling your leg, kid. But you're not the best victim.'

Kalyna snorted. 'Who's better?'

'Danse. He's easy to drive up the wall. But that might be just me.'

'Let's not talk about Danse. Or Deacon, for that matter. I could kick them both, sometimes.'

'Huh.' Nick stalled her. 'You hear that?'

'Yeah. Ghouls.'

'Well. You do know that you can make your pick, Kalyna, don't you?'

'My pick? We shoot them, of course. They don't sound like the type that'll speak to us.'

'Not the ghouls. Danse and Deacon. You can't be that blind.'

'I … what?' She stopped and took off the helmet of her power armour. 'What do you mean?' She talked in an undertone to avoid alerting the ghouls to them.

Nick had mirrored her. He rolled his eyes. 'Come on. They like you.'

'Deacon? Seriously? He doesn't even trust me. Neither does Danse, as I learned recently.'

'I'm not sure what it is in Deacon's case. But he sure likes you a lot. He looked like a beaten puppy when we left. If this is what I think it is, he's dead serious about it. I don't know if Danse is, but the way he looks at you speaks volumes.'

'Danse is a soldier.'

'And a man, Kalyna. He admires your strength and he's drawn to that. Don't forget that Danse doesn't know what Deacon stands for, even though he might guess. He makes Danse nervous because the two of you are very close: He's jealous.'

'Well, he doesn't have to. Deacon said he doesn't do that kind of thing.' When the spy had first told her that, she'd been relieved. Somehow, now, she wasn't. This wasn't good.

Nick's lips twitched into a small smile. 'I've known Deacon for a pretty long time. Probably met him shortly after he joined the Railroad, and that was about two decades ago. In that time, I've never seen him as relaxed as he is with you. He also seems to find reasons to spend time with you that have nothing to do with the Railroad, and that isn't like him. You've done something to him, but I'm not sure even he knows what that is yet. When he wises up, he'll either run to you or from you. I'm not sure which.'

'Are you asking me not to hurt him, or telling me to be careful because he could hurt me?'

'Neither. Or actually, a little bit of both. To the best of my knowledge, he's avoided relationships of this sort like the plague. I'm not sure if that is because it's not his thing or because something's happened to him. I'd guess it's the latter. Make of that what you will.'

'I … Nick, I shouldn't be thinking about this at all. My husband died recently, and my son is a monster, and … oh God. I can't. I can't do this.'

'That's what you've got to figure out. But your husband died sixty years ago. You didn't have anywhere near that long to mourn him, I know that. But you have a right to move on. Your entire life has changed. You're hardly the same person you were before the war. The only one who has a right to hold you back is you.' Nick put his helmet back on. 'Now we can chat about this or anything that's weighing on you as long as you want, but I'd rather do that when we're out of here. I don't like the Glowing Sea much more than you do, and this place here is bad even by its standards.'