I don't think I'll ever understand how Santana can seriously look hot in anything she puts on her body. I am by no means complaining about it, but it really makes it difficult to remain objective. Seriously, though? A hoodie and jeans and I'm practically drooling all over the place! You know what it was, it was the words "Columbia University" that were hugging so tightly around her body. My attraction to intelligence is suddenly becoming a problem.

Except it isn't just that. She's everything she was before and then some. She's so ambitious and sweet and funny... I didn't want her to know, but after she called the Woman before a Mirror a "big booty bitch," I silently laughed all the way over to Water Lilies. And one day we were texting and I guess she was zoning out in one of her classes and she said, "You know, I've always wondered why porn is legal but prostitution isn't. It has to be because everyone involved in porn gets paid... except for the viewer of course." I could hear her saying it and I must have laughed for a whole minute. It wasn't really that funny, I guess it was just so random and I knew she was sitting in a class thinking about this.

Santana's always been super smart and I was always super attracted to that. But now, if I'm completely honest with myself, something that I concluded I really need to be in all of this, I'm attracted to Santana even more now than ever before. I know exactly why, it's because I can see her becoming the person she's meant to be. I can see the work she's put into herself and it's just... sexy. That's it. Santana is just sexier than she's ever been; to a point where I almost can't control myself.

After our kiss in the Post-Impressionism gallery and getting silently kicked out of the Post-Impressionism gallery (I'll get back to that), we decided it was probably a good idea to head up to the roof. Apparently, there was a sign at the entrance to this structure thing warning that it could cause disorientation. I didn't see it. This thing was incredible, really, but it was basically a round house of mirrors... with several rooms on different levels. It wasn't that bad at first and seeing the surrounding buildings and clouds was really cool, but when we got to the main, I don't know, bubble, things were quite disorienting. The mirrors and open spaces that caused the buildings' reflections to be upside down and mixed with the sky made me dizzy to a point where it was difficult to stand. I grabbed Santana's hand and squeezed the life out of it as I tried to regain my focus behind my eyelids.

I felt her move and then her hand on my cheek, "Hey, Rach, look at me for a sec?" I opened my eyes and she was right there, the only thing I could focus on, "Are you okay?"

"I am now."

She laughed through this beautiful smile then asked me if I wanted to get out of there. I told her that we could stay especially if she liked being there. This is probably going to remain engrained in my mind forever: she rubbed her thumb along my cheek and said, "I do," then she placed the softest kiss on my lips, "but I like you a lot more. Come on." As she guided me out I kept my eyes on my feet and the fingers on my free hand on my lips.

When we hit the roof, she asked me if I wanted to sit. I didn't. I felt like leaning up against a wall was a much better idea. I looked around and spotted a section of the roof that was quasi-closed off. Even though there really weren't that many people on the roof to begin with, I didn't really want strangers bugging us as I attempted to regain my composure. Not that I'm tremendously famous or anything, but I had already been recognized once that afternoon.

I situated myself in a corner where solid wall met with the roof's more consistent half wall/half railing and thick, perfectly maintained hedges behind it while Santana leaned on the railing looking out at Central Park East. After a couple minutes she turned around to face me and asked me how I was feeling. I told her that I was better and then she asked me if I was chilly.

"Why, are you going to offer me your sweatshirt?" I asked with a smirk. I knew she wasn't going to because…

"If I had more than a bra underneath it, yes, I would," she laughed and leaned over on the railing again, but still facing me.

I don't know why, but I said the first thing that popped into my head, "I wouldn't mind that."

Her cheeks got a little pink, then she smirked and narrowed her eyes at me, "But then how would I stay warm?"

I looked her up and down and what she was wearing was still getting to me. "I can think of something," I said, then stretched my arms into the foot and half between us and pulled her to me by the pocket on her sweatshirt. It probably could have been a little more fluid and coordinated, but this was still by far one of the hottest things I've ever participated in. With my hands balling up Santana's pocket, I'd pulled her right into my lips. Our teeth actually hit a little, but I didn't care. I wanted to taste her again; see if she was different. I licked her bottom lip and nipped at it few times before she let me in. When she opened her mouth, her hand went to the wall next to my head and her other hand landed on my chest. I was barely thinking about what I was doing, I just knew that I wanted my tongue to play with hers. And oh my god, did it.

She does taste the same. She doesn't kiss the same, not exactly anyways, but she tastes the same. This mix of old and new continues to be intoxicating. Especially when she does things like suck on my tongue. She sucked. My. Tongue. It might sound weird, but you know what, if it wasn't for that wall, I might have fallen over.

I have no idea how long we were there, all I know is that by the time we were done, the sun was hitting the mirrors on the structure differently and things were rather uncomfortable in a certain place. She stopped us. I wasn't making it easy with the way that I was pulling on her sweatshirt, but she managed to do it. I didn't ask her why she stopped because I knew she liked it. She also answered the question on her own by whispering, "We have time," a few breaths after pulling away.

You know, I actually can't believe that I did that. Just, started making out with her in a public place. I mean, when we were together I had wanted us to have sex in public, but I'm pretty sure that I was bluffing. It was just everything about the day. From her clothes to all of the hand holding to our second first kiss…

I'm going to say it: that kiss was better than our first kiss. Our first kiss didn't really mean anything until after. Don't get me wrong, I remember it and I definitely don't wish that things had happened differently for us then, but this one was just… perfect. It wasn't long because she broke it with her own smile, but I think that's what made it so perfect. She even asked if she could kiss me and it was by far one of the most romantic things I've ever experienced. She kissed me again after I told her she didn't have to ask and it was during that one that the woman who worked in that gallery cleared her throat, then motioned for us to leave. Normally, I'd be mortified, but I just couldn't feel it through the daze I was in. We actually laughed all the way out of there.

It's just so different. Things are going completely opposite of how they went for us in high school. We're moving so slow and in a way that seems so normal, but I'm much more scared now than I was then. I am afraid of being hurt again and I know that in love that's a risk you have to take, but I'm not sure I can handle it being at the same hand twice. I know that we have to talk about our past, but I'm worried she'll shut me out again if I bring it up. You see, the problem is that I can already feel myself falling for her again, perhaps to a point where I'm already afraid to lose her. So I'm waiting, I'm waiting for her to bring it up. I know I could be setting myself up to make a mistake a second time, but I really think this time she'll find the right things to say and in time.

I actually haven't seen her since then. It's been a week, but my life has been kind of hectic since. It's opening week of Funny Girl and I've been making appearances all week on top of performing eight sold out shows. A social life in general has been impossible this week. Mondays are always dark though. It's my day to do pretty much whatever I want. This Monday, the first after a very busy opening week, I have nothing planned save for one thing: a date.

I'm not even seeing my fathers today who are in town until Wednesday. They got me nearly all day yesterday and they can have me again until call tomorrow. Today is for me and what I want is to see Santana. Oh my god! They wanted to see her! It has to be too soon for that. I'm not really sure, because well, I've never re-dated anyone before, but I'm pretty sure a week is too soon.

We're meeting in Columbus Circle at seven and I'm actually taking the subway there. I haven't been in the subway in months. Not since they put the ads up for Funny Girl in stations. It's just weird. Luckily, my face isn't in Knickerbocker Station or in Columbus Circle as I've been informed by pretty much everyone. At least not on the platform. I might have forgotten how long the subway takes though... I'm a little bit late.

"I'm sorry," I start calling out to Santana as soon as my foot hits the curb of the circle, "I haven't taken the subway in forever!"

"You know Berry," she says standing up from the steps of the Columbus statue, "if you weren't so damn adorable all the time, you wouldn't get away with half of the things you do."

God, if she wasn't so fucking hot all the time… well let's just say I wish there was a bed behind her and not stairs. I hate leather anything, but that jacket... I should probably get ahold of myself.

"I guess I should keep it up then, huh?" hopefully I've said that without any drooling.

"The adorableness part or the taking advantage of my weaknesses part?" she chuckles as her finger slides lightly down the edge of my hand from my wrist to my pinky.

My other hand goes to the uneven opening of her biker jacket that isn't real leather and winds up grabbing it.

"Both. I mean it's really only fair if you're going to look this hot all the time."

Yup. That just came out of my mouth. It would be really nice if my brain wouldn't give into my body every single time.

"Well, you know I'm not gonna stop doing that," she smirks at me and my body wins out again. I yank down on her jacket and bring her lips to mine in the middle of yet another public place. This date hasn't even really started yet and I can feel things getting... messy.

"Well, isn't this a familiar sight..."

Shut the fuck up.

Santana definitely recognized his voice. We both opened our eyes and hers are wide with shock.

Eight million people and probably just as many things to do... how did they find us?

~:~:~

Papa and Daddy insisted upon treating us to dinner. Despite how absolutely livid I was, I couldn't get myself to say "no" to them. Santana most certainly wasn't going to so it was up to me and I just let them crash in on whatever it was that Santana had planned. I don't get it: they let me move to New York City at the ripe old age of seventeen but feel the need to chaperone me on a date? Granted it's on a date with someone that they watched break their daughter's heart, but that was over two years ago and I can handle myself!

Okay so maybe they caught me not really handling myself all that well in the middle of Columbus Circle, but I don't need their help.

Alas, here we are in Hell's Kitchen with my dads at the restaurant that Santana planned for us to go to all along.

It actually hasn't been that bad. My Dads have been pleasant and at least seem like they just wanted to catch up with Santana. More importantly, Santana's doing really well. I know she's nervous, but that's just because I can recognize her tells. For example: before she answers one of their questions, she chews on the inside corner of her lip for a moment. The only other time she ever does that is when she's reading or working on something and then it lasts for much longer. I know she's worried about saying something wrong to them, but she hasn't. I don't think she's going to. She answered all of their questions about moving here with Cris, how Cris is doing, what it's like at Columbia, how she's doing at Columbia, if she's learned any new recipes and will she send them to Daddy. Really, she's passing with flying colors, in my eyes at least and as much as I respect my fathers' opinions and want their approval, it is my opinion that matters at the end of the day. We're almost done with dinner, thank god, because no matter how well this has gone, I feel so awful that they ruined Santana's plans.

"This is a really great place, Santana. It's got a very trendy atmosphere," Papa says looking around and I can't stop the snicker from coming out of my nose.

"Yeah, a friend of mine brought me here a little while back and I had noticed all of the different dietary options they had. Like, creative things," she started out looking at Papa, but she wound up looking over to me by the time she was finished saying it and for some reason, it makes this smile pop up on my face and I look away to the table. "Um… excuse me. I have to use the restroom. Three waters will do that to you," she laughs this super cute awkward laugh and pushes her chair out.

"You know what," Papa starts and throws his napkin on the table. Oh god he's going to go with her, "I have to use the restroom as well. I'll walk with you."

"O… kay," for the first time, Santana really lets her nerves show and I don't blame her for having them. I have them for her, but I can't do anything about it. I can't tell my father that he can't go to the bathroom! All I can do is watch them walk all the way to the back of the restaurant to the bathrooms.

Well, there is one thing I can do:

"This! This was your plan all along! Separate us so you can scare her! Not fair, Daddy!" I am whisper yelling at him right now.

"Babygirl-"

"No! I know what I'm doing okay… for the most part. I don't need you two to protect me," I'm not really doing the yelling part anymore, but I'm still letting him know that I am not happy with him and Papa.

"Has it occurred to you that maybe we just wanted to see Santana?" he asks in this tone that says, 'you're overreacting.'

But I don't think I am, "It did, until this moment."

He looks away from me and takes a breath. I'm right. Papa's talking to Santana.

"I know that you aren't a little girl anymore, Rachel, but you're still our little girl and there's nothing more painful than seeing you hurt-"

"I'm not-"

"You could," he makes sure I hear him, "Don't get me wrong, I see the way that you two are looking at each other and it looks like something I've seen before, but remember that you two were young and experienced a lot in a very short period of time-"

"Daddy, it's different this time," I really hope that he believes me because the last thing I want to talk about with my father at the moment is my sex life at sixteen and lack there of now, "We're taking things slow-"

"That's not what it looked like…"

Oh my god!

"Daddy, please! I know I'm your little girl, but I am an adult. There are just some things that I have to figure out on my own and this is one of them. You can't watch this unfold this time," I release the short breath I have left from that last sentence, then a little more quietly say, "I'm on my own."

"I know babygirl," he says with a sad look in his eyes, "Your father and I just worry about you."

"I know," I say grabbing his hand all the way across the table, "your my dads; that's your job."

"Leroy! The bathrooms are the best part about this place!"

"Oh really?" Daddy looks at me with his eyes wide then turns to Papa.

"The one I used was Dolly themed," he's still in awe as he sits back down.

"Mine was Cher," Santana popped up her eyebrows probably already knowing the response she was going to get.

Daddy's eyes grow two times their normal size, "Shut the front door! Which one?" He gets up and rounds the table to go to the back of the restaurant before Santana can answer him.

Santana laughs and says, "It'll be funny if he winds up in the Nelly one."

~:~:~

"Get home safe you two," Papa says as he's stepping into the cab Santana hailed for him.

"I've got Tate," I shrug and wait for him to sit down, "I love you!"

"Thanks for dinner!" Santana calls out just before I close the door.

As soon as the cab is gone I turn to her, "I am so sorry!"

"Rach, it's o-"

"It is so not okay," my hand goes to her jacket yet again, only this time I'm playing with the zipper at the bottom, "I don't even know how they found us. I didn't tell them anything."

"You know what? As much as much as we wish we could, we just can't control our Dads," she shrugs then turns me, wraps her arm around my shoulder and starts walking back uptown.

"Papa didn't like, threaten you or anything? Did he?" I really don't think he did, but I still feel like I should ask.

She laughs, "He um… he was just… H…"

I only kind of understand what she's saying. I do know that she had gotten really close with my dads. How could she not? She lived with us for two months. I know she was closer with Papa, though… so maybe that's why he went? I don't know and I'm not going to ask either. If she wants to tell me she will. Since she's laughing about, I'm going to assume it wasn't too traumatizing.

"You know," she says into the quiet that had fallen between us as her arm slides down my back, "it's only nine o'clock. We could do something else, you know, without your dads crashing."

"Like what?" I ask leaning into her a bit, enough that our path goes crooked.

"Tate can pick you up anywhere, right?" she asks leaning back into me, putting us back on a straight path.

"Of course he can," I laugh. Where could she possibly be thinking to take me?

"Okay, well, there's this pastry shop that's open pretty late a few blocks away from my apartment…"

"Umm… first of all, we just crossed 53rd St and you want us to go all the way near 125th?" she just shrugs and smiles, "And seriously? A pastry shop? I have costumes to fit into."

"First of all," Santana mimics my tone as she turns us onto 54th St going towards 8th, "I didn't say we have to walk there and second of all, you had a tofu, lettuce and tomato sandwich. One cannoli won't make you fat, beautiful."

Suddenly breathing is a challenge. If there's anything that's brought me rushing back to sixteen it's hearing that. I don't think that's something that just slipped out though. I think she was really saying that.

"You know," I swallow hard and try to keep my breath steady, "Daddy always told me not to fall for someone just because they call me beautiful."

"Well," her hand slides across the bottom of my back, then finds my hand, "My Papá always told me not to lie to people that I care about." I can feel her looking over at me, so I turn my head. The corner of her lip is tucked between her teeth.

"I'd love to go all the way uptown with you," I say through my melting heart. "But how are we getting there?" I ask not seeing her trying to hail us a cab.

"The one train," she says pointing ahead of us to the Columbus Circle station entrance, "Think you can handle it twice in one day?"

"Yes," I say not entirely pleased with the jest, but then I remember that I only put one ride on my MetroCard, "I uhhh…"

"Only got one ride?" she laughs as we ride the escalator down, "The adorableness continues!" Then she kisses my temple and I think I'm melting again.

When we get off of the escalator, Santana guides me over to a kiosk so that we can make sure I have enough to get onto the subway and as I'm tapping away at the screen, deciding whether I want to just get the one or suck it up put the seven dollars on for the free ride later, I hear her mumble, "Oh shit."

"What?" I ask as I pull my freshly refilled MetroCard back out of the machine.

"Uhh… nothing. Just um," she turns me back towards the turnstiles, "don't look back there."

Of course I'm going to now… and there I am.

"It's okay, we aren't going to be near it," I shrug. It is kind of a big deal because it's really weird knowing that there's a giant picture of me on the wall about 50 feet away, but I'll survive.

"We'll stand even further down the platform," she says pulling up further to where the front of the train will be, "I think one should be here in a couple minutes anyways."

She's right, not even two minutes later and a 1 train is stopping in front of us.

For some reason, people don't like to sit in the front of the train. I don't mind, especially when it gets me a seat. When we step into the car, we cross the train and sit diagonally across from the doors we came in.

"Son of a bitch," Santana mumbles, looking up in front of her.

"What?" I ask but then look up to what her eyes are seeing, "Oh." There I am again, right across from us in the horizontal adds at the top of the car. I actually start cracking up. It's hilarious. I don't ride the subway purposely for months because I think it's weird that my face is all over them and the one time I'm unexpectedly on the train, there I am. "Well, I'm just everywhere, aren't I?"

"Mhm," Santana hums and her thumb starts stroking the back of my hand.

"What?" I ask and for some reason my instinct is to kiss her shoulder. I know that we've made out in public twice now, but this was a little more intimate on top of unexpected. But Santana's smiling, so it couldn't have been a bad idea. I still need to stop falling into things that we used to do, because this isn't the same.

"That's why we're here."

"Huh?" she's lost me.

"You're everywhere," she's doing that lip chewing thing again, "almost inescapable, really. That's why Papá brought me to your preview..." she starts drawing aimless patterns on the back of my hand, "I um... kind of started collecting... you."

The look on her face right now is just so... everything. It's honest and vulnerable, a little desperate and her gorgeous brown eyes are searching mine. God she's so beautiful. I know that wasn't easy to say and she definitely didn't have to tell me that. But she did and now I just can't help that I want to kiss her. I shift myself a little and I see more nerves in her eyes. I hope I can kiss them away. I place my empty hand on her cheek, let a smile play onto my lips, then witness those nerves fall away right away before my lips reach hers. Every time I kiss her I feel like I just can't get enough of her. It doesn't feel like it will never be enough, it just feels like... I've been missing out.

She stops us again, but stays pretty close, "You don't think it's weird?"

I laugh a little as I say, "It is a little." My laughter disappears though because I know she needs me to actually say something. I decided I was going to be honest with myself, I should be giving her the same courtesy, especially if she's going to lay her heart on the table. "You telling me that," I start and feel my throat tighten with nerves, but I want her to hear exactly how I feel, "makes me feel... wanted."

I can't remember everything I said to her that day that now feels like was ages ago, but I know that's one thing. One major thing. It isn't a jab, it's the furthest thing from it.

I'm letting her in. I'm letting her know that it's happening, I'm falling for her again. I know it's cryptic and it could easily be misinterpreted, but the kiss she leaves on my lips tells me that she heard me and she's here with me. I know there's still a lot that needs to be said, but we're both here and that's all I need in this moment.

"Thank you," she breaks the kiss yet again.

"For what?" I smile as it connects that we're in a public place still.

"For not thinking I turned into a stalker or something," she chuckles and sits back in the seat.

"Oh, you don't fit the profile," I wave her off with a half joke, half serious statement.

She laughs a little louder than before, "Have you been watching Criminal Minds? Because that is not something I'd ever think you'd watch."

Time for some truth: "Yes I have been watching Criminal Minds and I will have you know that I acted like a scared little bitch that night we watched Scream so that I could be all over you. You're the fool who never asked to watch a slasher movie again."

"Wait, seriously?" she's a little more shocked that I had anticipated.

"Yeah..." I say through partially gritted teeth, "it was a really great excuse to feel on your abs for an hour or so."

She laughs nervously as a blush rises into her cheeks and she drops her head down to look at the floor.

"Our stop is next," she says looking out the window across from us.

I don't know why I thought she'd bring things up now. It's just that this is the second reference to 'us' and it's the second time she's deflected away from it. It's frustrating waiting, but I just need to be patient. Besides, the 1 train really isn't an ideal location to hash out things that happened between us.

When the train slows to a stop at the 125th St station, we get up from our seats, still holding hands and walk off of the train.

"Ummm…" I look up to Santana who is looking away from the train and over me, "Maybe you shouldn't look at the railings."

For some reason, I just start cracking up. Again. I really am everywhere. The thing is though, we probably wouldn't notice if we didn't know me. I can hear Santana laughing with me and I wonder if any of the people on this platform are looking at us.

I have an idea.

"San," I laugh out and cross behind her to get to one of the ads. I stand right next to myself and laugh some more, "Take a picture."

"What?"

"Come on!"

"Okay," she chuckles and pulls her phone out of her jacket pocket. When she picks up her phone to take the picture, I turn just my head towards my face on the ad and give a 'this is awkward' face, "Ohmygod, Rach, this is so funny." She walks over to me holding out her phone so that I can see it.

"Please text that to me!" I am laughing even harder than I was before.

"I will. Oh man," she's trying to breathe out her laughter, "We need to get off this platform, it's too chilly on the els," she lets out another calming breath, "And the bakery is gonna close soon."

"Okay," I breathe out, then link our arms together, "After all that laughter, I think I really can have a cannoli."

"Rachel, you could have one anyways," I can hear her rolling her eyes at me and it makes me laugh, "I promise you'll still be hot."

Now I'm laughing a little nervously and I can feel my stomach getting all flustered. "Thanks," I mutter into her arm as we get to the turnstile to exit.

"What is this?" she turns away from me and backs up through the turnstile, "A little taste of someone's own medicine?"

She thinks she's so funny. I shove my way through the turnstile and then make the mistake of looking down. That fucking jacket and her hands in the pockets… and her smirk… the jacket. I grab it and pull her to me hard. God I just can't get my brain to take control. Wait, what was I thinking about… oh yeah, Santana's lips and her teeth.

"Rach," she pulls her lips back and presses our foreheads together, "we keep doing this in public."

Because we're always in public when we're together, I think, but say, "I know."

"Come on," she takes my arm again and we get on the escalator to take us down to the street. Once we're down there, she slides her hand down to hold mine and we walk in a comfortable and flirty silence down Broadway until we get to the bakery. The closed bakery. "Son of a bitch!"

"San, it's okay," I smile as I read the sign that says they actually closed at seven.

"I think I forgot that it's Monday. Umm… I don't know what to do…?"

"Well Tate won't be up here until eleven…" it's 10:15.

We're in her neighborhood. We could go to her place. I might be hoping really hard that she invites me to her place.

"Umm… we could…" it's pretty bright so I can blatantly see her gulp down at her nerves, "hang out at my place."

"Okay!" Did that sound too excited? "Uh… yeah, sure."

"Okay," Santana says, still nervous as I mentally smack my palm to my forehead, "It's down that block and around."

It takes us only a few minutes to walk to her door, however, it takes forever to walk up all of her stairs. She lives on the top floor of this building… six stories up. I mean, I guess it isn't that bad, except that it is. I am in great shape, I just hate stairs.

"Okay, it's a little messy," she says lingering with the key in the door.

I give her a look that says, 'oh please,' then say, "I don't care, San."

"I do," she rolls her eyes, but turns the key. She pushes open the door and gestures for me to walk in first.

A little messy? I have no idea what she's talking about. This place is amazing. It's a studio apartment so it's only two rooms… room number two is a bathroom, but it's so great. And so Santana. When I walked in my eyes immediately went diagonally across from the door to her bed. Not for the reason you think. Give me some credit. There's a giant window behind her bed. Her bed, by the way, is on this sort of platform and in front of that is a sofa with a coffee table in front of that. To the left is her kitchen area where she has pretty much everything but a dishwasher. There's a small white table with a bunch of newspapers and a couple magazines… probably the mess that she was talking about.

"Like it?" she asks from the door behind me.

"I love this," I say still looking at everything around me. There's a flatscreen on the wall across from her bed and sofa, "This place is so perfect for you."

"Papá wishes I didn't live by myself," she says as she moves over to the table and immediately starts organizing the things on it.

I'm moving further into the space. "Yeah, but you're still close to Columbia," I turn to her for a second before going over to one of the bookcases that are on either side of the TV.

"Yeah, there's actually one of those blue light things nearby," she says and I see her put something into a cabinet. Hm… the table is completely cleared off.

"I just love everything about it!" I say turning to her completely.

"Even the colors?" she chuckles, nodding towards the window.

She has a huge black curtain hanging from the ceiling. I'm assuming that even though this apartment faces west, it's still kind of bright in here in the morning and it's a huge window in front of her bed. I can't blame her for having black curtains. I look down though and see that her bedding is black, too. Well, black and white actually… and the sofa is white… the coffee table is black… the book cases are black and her dresser is white. Literally everything that she put in here herself is black and white.

"Yes," I answer, "even the colors."

"Papá and I built that platform and the step that goes up to it," she points back over to her bed, "I wish a bigger one would have fit in here, but I guess that's better than the twin I would have had in a dorm."

I think I need her to stop talking about her bed, "So, what do you wanna do for a half an hour?"

I know what I want to do…

She pushes herself off of the counter that she's been leaning on, walks past the table then past me to the couch. She sits down then shrugs, "I have cable."

I still know what I want to do…

"Time Warner's the worst," I say as I shrug off my jacket and let it fall to the coffee table. Then, I sit down right next to her. Like, there's plenty of room on the other side of me right next to her, "Why do you still have your jacket-"

I know I was asking for it but I don't think I was ready for her to just… jump me. Not complaining! I am so glad she did. Remember how I said I wished we were more fluid on the roof of the Met… we were just in perfect sync. Even though she turned and starting kissing me so quickly, when she started pushing me down, I was ready and my leg tucked under her perfectly and now she's got one of her legs between mine and me pinned underneath her.

It's nice to know that it isn't just me.

With the exception of her being on top of me, this is actually pretty tame. Our hands are staying above waistlines and our mouths aren't leaving to finding somewhere to else play. I will say that I'm having a hard time not putting my hands on her ass. And her hand is dangerously close to my breast. She keeps balling my shirt into her fist and when I try that little trick she used on me last week, I think she might have ripped it. She moans into my mouth and two things happen: I feel like I'm going to come apart and I realize that my hand made it to her ass.

Then my phone starts ringing.

Santana pulls up from me but I pull her back into me. Tate can wait a little bit. We keep going until my phone stops ringing, but then it starts going off again.

"Rachel."

"Just a little more," I try to pull her back, but she fights me.

When I stop pulling, she lowers herself back down a little, "You know what?"

"What?" I ask only slightly annoyed.

"I really want to ask you to stay, but I'm not going to."

I actually love that she's saying this to me. Like, this is actually a turn on for me right now, if I wasn't already before. I am just baffled by the things that my body is reacting to with her. I think it's my ironic arousal that fuels me to ask, "Why not?"

"Because," she starts, but because sometimes my attraction to her blinds my objectivity, my finger tips find the skin on her back just above her pants. I can see her struggling to get out whatever it is she's trying to say and it isn't helping my own worsening situation, but now that my fingers are there, I can't pull them away. "I'm," she takes a deep breath and swallows hard, "not... ready."

"Okay," I answer simply. Honestly, I don't think I'm ready either.

She gets up and grabs my jacket, then grabs my hand to walk me out. She walks me all the way back down the six flights of stairs, helps me put my jacket on, then kisses me and says, "Goodnight, beautiful."

It all gets to me. It gets to me so much that these words get caught in my throat. Words I'm not sure I mean yet… or again.

"Goodnight," I manage to get out what I know I want to say, then step outside where Tate is waiting for me. "Sorry, Tate. My phone was on silent."

"It's alright Miss Berry, I'm just happy you're alright," he says then closes the door.

I've never asked him to before because I think it's weird, but I think I need him to put the privacy… thing up. Or do I do that? I do.

"I'm really tired, Tate, if you don't mind I'm going to…" I point to the button that will block his sight to the back seat.

"I don't mind, Miss Berry," he smiles into the rearview then looks back in front of him.

Oh god… I definitely needed privacy.

A/N: I totally meant to have this up yesterday. Super duper sorry! Anyways, that structure on the roof of the Met, totally real. If you do a Google image search for Met Cloud City, you'll see exactly what they were in. Technically, that wasn't there this past fall, but if Glee can be inconsistent so can I. I'll admit it though. Alright, hope you all have a wonderful weekend! I'd love to hear from you!