AJ Rizzoli woke up out of breath. She'd had a rare dream of her mother. It'd been more than a decade since Jane's death, but AJ saw her face so clearly that she thought it'd been real.
"You okay?"
Her younger brother lingered in the entryway of the living room, his dark brown eyes – identical to Jane & AJ's – watching her in confusion. AJ followed his gaze, spotting two empty wine bottles on the coffee table and her mother asleep at the other end of the couch.
AJ slowly remembered the night before. The long hours they'd spent in front of the fire, feet in each other's laps, glasses of wine in hand, as Maura shared the forgotten moments of 30 years before. She told her daughter about the day she was kidnapped and shot, how she feared for her life when Richard Keller killed a traffic cop on the side of the highway, how she was certain she was going to die. Sometimes Maura would pause in the dark, sipping on her drink or staring off. AJ would give her mother's knee a squeeze and assure that she didn't need to share anymore. But she did. She told AJ how Jane had been the hero who tracked her down, how Officer Emily Owens had been killed, and how she'd woken up in the hospital in Jane's arms.
They'd fallen asleep after Maura told her about Jane's emotional exit from the hospital. AJ could see even now it brought her mother heartache. She frowned as she watched her sleep.
"What the hell happened?" he asked.
AJ ignored his question. "What are you doing here?"
She hadn't seen her other brother, twenty-four year old Owen Patrick Rizzoli, since returning to Boston. And before that when she was in New York, their visits and exchanges were sparse. While time had passed he still looked like the rambunctious baby of the family AJ remembered. His brown hair was a mess, with a few curly locks falling into his line of sight. He looked like his uncle Frankie – though he was most often compared to his uncle Tommy when it came to personality.
"I'm here for brunch," Owen told her. He kept his voice low because their mother was sleeping but he held clear disdain for his sister. They'd drifted apart after Jane's death. Owen entered a rebellious phase, one that had yet to end, and AJ resented him for causing Maura extra grief.
"Brunch?" she asked. Her head hurt from the wine and she'd slept at a strange angle on the couch, making her muscles stiff.
"Yeah, mom has us over on the second Saturday of every month. Of course, you wouldn't know since you abandoned the family and ran away to New York…"
"First of all, fuck you. Second, I didn't run away."
"You broke mom's heart when you left, and you know it."
"Oh, like you do every time you get your dumb ass in trouble…"
"No fighting," Maura cut in.
Her children looked over in surprise. The doctor's eyes were still closed as she grumbled. It reminded them of childhood – she could manage to scold them in her sleep.
"Sorry," they apologized.
Maura yawned as a phantom pain shot through her hip and shoulder. It was as if talking about her kidnapping the night before literally reopened old wounds.
"Looks like I missed out on some party," Owen said.
"Alexandra and I were just having a long talk," Maura replied, raising an eyebrow at her daughter.
Owen wandered into the kitchen and the doctor slowly got up, kissing the top of AJ's head before joining her youngest. She grabbed Owen's face with both hands and kissed his forehead. Maura's love for her children was unshakeable and palpable. Whatever warmth she missed out on her own childhood, she was sure to bestow upon her kids tenfold, even as they entered adulthood.
"I'll put on some coffee," Owen smirked. "I think you two need it."
"Ugh, yeah," AJ mumbled, sitting at the kitchen island.
"We're home!" another familiar voice shouted from the foyer. The sound of laughter and the front door slamming followed. Rosalyn the dog, barked and yelped happily, darting back and forth across the wood floors ahead of the new arrivals.
AJ squeezed her forehead against the pain of her hangover. "God, do you have to yell?" she grumbled.
"Good morning boys," Maura greeted, beaming from ear to ear. She opened her arms wide as James and TJ Rizzoli appeared. Both men towered above her and had to crouch down to reach her. "How were your shifts?"
"I delivered three babies last night," James said, kissing his mother's cheek. He was still in his hospital scrubs.
"And I helped stop a bank robbery over in Jamaica Plains," TJ announced, giving his aunt a bear hug.
Thomas Edward Rizzoli Jr. carried on the family law enforcement legacy long before his younger cousin could. But fist he'd joined the Army out of high school – much to his family's dismay. Fortunately, his aunt Jane had a contact in the military, and he was assigned to serve under a General Casey Jones, who kept him relatively safe while on tour. When he returned to the states, TJ joined BPD. But rather than pursue a career as a detective like his aunt and uncle, he joined the SWAT team – a position that suited his immense size and energy.
Since his birth, Maura and Jane, had been close with Tommy's son. They were there for every big event; his birth, his baptism, first day of kindergarten, tee-ball and birthday parties. When he was seven, Lydia moved to California to be with her new husband and TJ chose to stay in Boston with his father and the rest of the Rizzoli's. Tommy was clean and straight-laced for most of those years – but trouble resurfaced when TJ was about eleven. Tommy was pulled over for a fourth DUI and sentenced to five years in prison. TJ would spend that time with his aunts Maura and Jane as guardians, and even after Tommy's release, he considered them more like mothers than his own parents. For the other Rizzoli children it was just as natural. AJ especially looked up to him and often said she had three brothers.
"You got the Jamaica Plains robbery?" AJ perked up. "I knew that was you…"
"Don't be jealous," TJ winked, wrapping her into a headlock. "How's homicide treating you?"
"It's going well," she replied, pushing her cousin away.
"Yeah? Uncle Frankie told me you're looking into the Denton case," he said.
The sentence brought the noisy kitchen to silence. TJ blushed as if realizing he'd revealed a secret he wasn't meant to share.
"You're re-opening the Denton case?" Owen asked first. He looked between his sister and cousin in confusion.
"Sorry, I shouldn't have said anything," TJ muttered. His dark eyes flashed apologetically to his aunt, but Maura shook her head.
"It's okay, I've known about it," the doctor said placidly.
"And you're okay with it?" Owen snapped. He looked around the room. "Am I the only one who didn't know?"
"Owen, it's not a big deal," AJ sighed.
"Not a big deal? Ma is dead because she went down that rabbit hole, trying to solve something that was never going to be solved. And all those demons tormented this family until it finally took one of us…"
"Owen, sweetheart, please," Maura whispered, placing a gentle hand on his shoulder.
"I won't calm down," he barked. "I'm tired of everyone acting like I'm the crazy screw up! Like I should just move on after everything that happened. AJ goes and decides to reopen the case and no one blinks an eye? That's not fair!"
"None of it's fair Owen," AJ shouted back.
"Guys, come on," James sighed, always playing the peacekeeper as the middle child.
"Can't we just eat pancakes?" TJ suggested.
"We all lost the same mother. It hurts all of us just as much," AJ continued, angered by Owen's tendency to center on his own grief.
"You weren't there. You don't have to live knowing that she's gone because of you," he snapped. "You didn't have to watch her die."
The youngest Rizzoli, another baby-faced brunette that pulled at Maura's heart strings, wasn't a troublemaker without a reason. Unlike his siblings, Owen was there that day. He was the one Jane died trying to protect. His issues with discipline, drugs, and alcohol came as little surprise in many ways, and while Maura didn't mean to be lenient with him, she couldn't help but sympathize and hurt for her son. Even now as she stayed quiet, attempting to not take sides with either of her children, her heart broke for Owen.
"You don't get a monopoly on grief," AJ told him. She lowered her voice but remained fierce in her convictions. "We've all coped in our own ways. You can't judge me for how I've chosen to move forward."
"No but I can judge you for disappearing for the last ten years and then showing up to dig through everyone's old wounds…"
"Okay, okay," James cut in. "I think that's enough for one day. How about you go back to your corners and we enjoy some breakfast? Because I worked a double and TJ just got off graveyard and you two are grumpy enough that food can only help the cause."
"Fine," AJ murmured, flicking Owen one last glare.
"Whatever," he replied, shuffling back into the kitchen.
"Thank you, Jamie," Maura whispered to her son, squeezing his arm as she passed. She certainly had more to say about the situation and understood there was healing that needed to happen between family members, but letting the situation diffuse itself seemed like the easiest course of action. James Rizzoli had an uncanny ability to do just that. He gave his mother a nod before nudging his sister.
"Come on, I didn't catch the Bruins game last night – I set up mom's DVR…"
"Yes, and I don't appreciate you taking up all the memory James Louis Rizzoli," Maura scolded, rolling up her sleeves in the kitchen.
"I need coffee first," AJ grumbled.
"Yes, someone get your sister coffee – she's worse than your mother without it."
The Rizzoli boys froze in shock, all staring at their matriarch with gaping mouths. Only AJ seemed unaffected.
"What?" Maura asked finally.
"You just never talk about Ma," James replied gently. "I mean, you do sometimes, just not like that."
"She talks about her with me," AJ said nonchalantly.
"I didn't realize…" Maura murmured.
She suddenly felt embarrassed, almost ashamed, for not speaking of her wife. The woman who had been the absolute foundation of their family. How had she so quickly erased her name from her lips or stopped sharing their sweet memories with their children? The family they'd worked so hard to build and grow. It wasn't until that moment, in the kitchen with their adult children, that she realized how much she'd cut off. It also became apparent to everyone else, how vital AJ was in in bringing their mother back to those golden days. To remembering and speaking of the Jane Rizzoli they all loved and missed.
"Here," Owen said, sliding his older sister a hot cup of coffee.
"Thank you," AJ nodded.
"Ah, thank God, a truce," James smiled.
"Good, because all this arguing has distracted from my very important announcement," TJ interjected.
The tallest, strongest, and oldest of the clan had unbuttoned his uniform top, revealing a black t-shirt with the words SWAT underneath. His dark eyes were a little sunken in, his hair greasy, from a long night on patrol. Still a wide, Tommy Rizzoli-esque grin, stretched across his face.
"What's the announcement?" Maura asked her nephew.
"Sarah and I are getting married," he smiled.
The kitchen erupted with congratulations and excitement. Maura got on her tip toes hug him and his cousins gave him high-fives.
"About time you make an honest woman out of her," AJ told him.
"Well…" TJ paused. "There's something else."
"Uh oh," Owen muttered under his breath.
"She's pregnant," he revealed.
"I knew it!" James shouted with a hearty laugh.
"What do you mean you knew it?"
"Well, Sarah and I work together," James explained. "And she was getting a little fuller in the chest region and…"
"Why were you looking at her chest!" TJ snapped, smacking the back of his cousin's head.
"I'm a doctor!" James defended himself with a chuckle.
"Don't hit him," AJ put in, smacking TJ's head in return.
"Not hitting children!" Maura shouted, though the small squabble was hardly a fight. It brought a smile to her face, reminding her of family dinners and loud holidays. She could still imagine Jane in the mix, laughing harder and shouting more among the little Rizzolis, than anyone else.
"What do you think aunt Maura?" TJ asked her.
"About Sarah?" she clarified. It became clear that her nephew took her approval more seriously than anyone else's. It warmed her heart. "I'm very happy for you sweetie. And I like Sarah very much – this family could certainly use a nurse. Granted, I would advise her against marrying a police officer…"
"Mother!" AJ scolded.
"It's a dangerous line of work," Maura clarified.
"Aunt Maura, you married a cop, married into a family of cops, and then raised more cops," TJ grinned. "I don't think you're the best person to dish out that advice."
"Well raising cops wasn't my intention but point taken," Maura winked. "How will you propose?"
"Hadn't gotten that far," TJ admitted, pouring himself coffee. "How did aunt Jane propose? Or how did you propose? Actually, who proposed to who?"
All eyes landed on Maura. Again, it hit her that she'd hardly spoken about Jane for years. She did her best to ignore the guilt in her stomach. The kids had huddled around the kitchen island and AJ gave her mother an encouraging nod. Maura could see Jane shining through the young woman again telling her to continue.
"It wasn't very traditional and it's a little complicated," the doctor started sheepishly.
"I want to hear it mom," Owen smiled.
"Okay," Maura sighed. She leaned forward and stared at her interlaced fingers, suddenly seeing the day clearly. "I had just been shot and your mother broke up with me at the hospital…"
…30 years earlier…
The poised and strong Dr. Maura Isles, Medical Examiner for the Commonwealth of Massachusetts, all but crumpled the moment Jane Rizzoli walked out. The tears rolled freely, and the pain of her physical injuries paled in comparison to the agony of her heart. She wanted to sob out, but this was more than sadness. She was struck silent by utter devastation.
By the time Constance entered the room, Maura stared off, her cheeks stained with tears.
"What's wrong?" she asked her.
"Please just take me home," the doctor replied, refusing to look at her mother.
Constance's lips trembled with sympathy at her daughter's distress. She reached out and gently touched her uninjured shoulder. Maura shrugged it away.
"What's happened?" Constance asked. The realization hit her as she glanced around the room. "Where's Jane?"
Maura swallowed past another pit of tears.
"Please, mother. Please take me home," she whispered distantly.
The silence at the house on Beacon Hill had never been more soul-crushing. During their year of separation, Maura had gotten used to no longer having Jane around. She'd learned to erase the memories of the brunette drinking coffee in the kitchen, or watching baseball in the living room, or curling next to her in the bedroom. But now it hit her all over again. She was reminded of Jane's absence with every breath.
The days felt long and passed with unshakeable apathy. In a move that was completely out of character, Maura spent most of her time mindlessly watching television or flipping through magazines. She only managed to give minimal energy at her physical therapy appointments. Other than that, she hardly ate, certainly didn't cook, and slept only a few hours each night despite the strong pain killers prescribed for her injuries. She resigned herself to misery. Even if work had been an option to distract her, Maura wasn't sure if she'd revel in it like she had before. For the first time, she couldn't imagine her future. She couldn't imagine making it off the couch or pushing herself through life against such heartbreak.
Her mother stayed at the house all the while. Maura told her she could leave once she settled in, but for the first time that the doctor could remember, Constance stayed. She tried to get Maura to eat and even to lesser success, she attempted to get her to speak, but it was to little avail.
Maura called Jane only once. That night after the former detective left, Maura hesitantly dialed, only to get her voicemail. The doctor promptly hung up, refusing to leave a message.
A few knocks on the door indicated visitors. Korsak came but Maura told her mother to turn him away. When Frankie and Nina tried to see her, Maura nearly hid. She couldn't bear to see Jane's brother. She wondered if he knew that Jane left her. If he'd spoken to her since. She wanted to ask him if Jane was suffering as much as she was. She wanted to know that she wasn't the only one who could no longer see the light.
"Angela is here to see you darling," Constance announced on the fifth day.
Maura was in her usual spot on the couch, watching a reality television program that consisted of fighting, screeching, and poor grammar. Her mother's announcement about Angela made her nauseous.
"Tell her I'm asleep," Maura said dryly.
"I can see that's not true," Angela replied.
The doctor's face dropped as the woman's voice cut through the room. Maura slowly turned to find the Rizzoli matriarch with a face that was crestfallen but strong. She sat next to Maura on the couch without asking for permission.
"I'll leave you two to talk," Constance told them.
Maura realized the two women had conspired against her and bit on her lower lip with resentment. Angela grabbed the remote control, turning down the blaring TV. Her hazel eyes searched Maura for some sign of acknowledgement.
"Have you heard from her?" the doctor finally asked.
It hurt to say the words. The anticipation hurt even worse, watching Angela's mouth drop with a frown.
"Only once, to tell me she was going back to Quantico. She won't take my calls," Angela said. She looked like she wanted to cry. "She won't speak to Frankie either."
"Did she tell you why she was going?" Maura asked.
"No – she just said that it was best for everyone," she answered.
Maura shook her head, tears filling her eyes.
"It certainly doesn't feel that way, does it?" the doctor sniffled.
"Oh, sweetheart," Angela said, grabbing Maura's hand. She thought of pulling away, not wanting to be touched in her intense sorrow, but stayed put and looked down. "What happened? Do you know why she would do this?"
"She said she was protecting me. She thinks she's the reason I got kidnapped and hurt," Maura whimpered. "Jane said leaving was the only way to keep me safe. She blames herself…"
"That's what I was afraid of," Angela sighed.
"It's not fair," Maura sobbed. The emotions were strong now, slipping out of the cold front she'd used to hold in her agony. Now with the flood gates open, she felt like she couldn't stop. "I just got her back. I messed up in Paris – I know I hurt her and I ruined things for us. But we had a second chance and she just walked away…"
The doctor was looking up now and through her tears could see that Angela was quietly crying as well. Maura swallowed hard, hiccupping against another whimper.
"I love her. I've always loved her Angela," she confessed.
"I know honey," Angela nodded. She was still holding the doctor's hand and hastily wiped a tear away. She cleared her throat and turned serious. "Jane is so in love with you, Maura. Which is why you have to go and get her."
The statement came as such a shock that Maura stopped crying.
"What?" she said.
"Don't let her get away this time," Angela told her. "I love my daughter, but she is stubborn and thinks she's responsible for everyone else's happiness – and then she met you. It was the first time I saw her smile through the hard times. The first time she let herself be happy. Jane's hardly alive without you. She just exists. You need each other; don't let her get away."
Maura wiped away her tears. She realized she should have given the woman more credit all those years before. She knew Angela viewed her as a daughter, but she also expected her to resist Jane being in a relationship with another woman. Now it was clear all along she'd been the couple's biggest fan.
"Jane is the one who left, Angela. She doesn't want to be with me…"
"You're smarter than that," the Rizzoli matriarch nearly scolded her. "You two love each other, Maura. Go get her."
Angela's encouragement renewed her spirit. If it'd been possible, Maura would've jumped in her car and driven straight to Virginia that night. Instead, she dried her eyes and the next morning showered for the first time in days, wincing as the hot water hit her stitches and battered limbs. She struggled on her sore hip but managed to change into a blouse and jeans. She covered the scratches and bruises the best she could with make-up. A black eye still peaked out on her fair complexion, but she appeared more like her former self than she had since her kidnapping. Maura took a deep breath as she stared at herself in the mirror. This was it; she was going to get Jane back and this time she was going to keep her.
Her mother didn't protest when Maura hobbled in, leaning on her cane, asking for a ride to the airport just before six o'clock in the morning. She didn't explain the reason for her trip and Constance didn't ask. When she parked along the curb of Logan Airport, she cupped the side of her daughter's face.
"Good luck darling," she whispered.
"Thank you, mother," Maura said.
The doctor watched the sunrise on the Boston skyline as her plane took flight. Light reflected off the Atlantic. For the first time in a year and half, since Jane left Paris, a weight lifted off her chest. Her place in the world finally made sense. As if Maura could reach out and grab the future she'd always wanted.
A young FBI agent stopped her taxi when she arrived at the Academy. She handed him her license and identification badge, but he shook his head.
"You're not on the list."
"I'm the Medical Examiner for the Commonwealth of Massachusetts…"
"Yeah and you're not on the list," he cut her off.
Maura's jaw hitched and her eyes darkened.
"I believe you may be too new to understand, but I don't need to be on a list," she paused, looking at his nametag, "Agent Stevens. I've closed more cases than all your superior officers combined, I'm one of the country's top minds in forensics, and the Governor of Massachusetts is a personal friend. You can ask any of your superiors and they will testify not only to my qualifications but scold you for making me wait. But I'll have you get on your little radio and call Agent Gabriel Dean who will tell you to escort me in immediately. And if you waste a second more of my time, I promise you'll be stuck here checking lists for the next three years."
The taxi driver suppressed a smirk and the young agent blushed. "Sorry ma'am."
Whatever steely nerves motivated Dr. Maura Isles at the front gate all dissipated when she finally reached the classroom on the third floor. Maura gripped onto her cane a little harder. Tracking Jane down on the Quantico campus had been hard enough and during her search she couldn't find the woman fast enough. Now, peaking through the small window of the door, she was filled with apprehension.
Jane looked sexier than Maura remembered.
Something about seeing her at the head of the room, teaching a class of FBI agents, filled Maura's core with heat. She was gesturing toward a photo of an old crime scene on the projector behind her, dark hair rolling down her shoulders, jaw sharp and strong in her profile. Her toned arms filled out a black FBI polo shirt.
"In this case the victim was found in the woods on her back, naked and beaten. You can see the post-mortem lividity is sporadic and spread to different parts of the body. What does this indicate?"
"That the body was moved several times after the deadly assault," Maura spoke up.
The door in the back of the room closed behind her and the cadets turned in surprise. The doctor carefully moved down the aisle between the rows of desks, using the cane to help her.
"You can see the victim was found supine but most of the pooling is across the abdomen and chest, indicating that the victim was initially kept prone. If I remember this case correctly, that's because the woman was transported in the backseat of a car," Maura concluded.
She stopped a few rows back from Jane, whose mouth was agape. Her brown eyes took in Maura as though she were seeing a ghost. Desire flashed across her gaze and she couldn't stop the smirk that twitched her mouth.
"That's right Dr. Isles," Jane said, her voice cracking. She pulled in a slow breath. "What are you doing here?"
A low murmur sounded across the room as the students began whispering to each other. The kidnapping had made national headlines. Jane's involvement in the case spread quickly across Quantico and the renowned medical examiner was recognizable to almost everyone.
"You left," the doctor said. "We finally found each other again and you ran away."
"Maura…"
"You said it was to protect me, but you don't get to make that choice alone, Jane. We're partners. We always have been and before all this nonsense with Keller, you wanted to be together…"
The words came quickly, and the doctor didn't care that they had an audience. She ignored the whispers and in fact, forgot about everything except Jane.
"It was foolish of you to leave. It was selfish and I know you're scared but…"
"Maura please…"
"I'm not going to let you go this time. I'm not, I-I-I..."
Jane stepped forward, putting herself just inches away from Maura. The doctor worried that perhaps the woman was angry or embarrassed that she'd disrupted her class, airing their relationship problems, but instead her face was soft and full of love.
"Maura please stop," Jane said. "You don't have to do this."
"But I do, I…"
"This is my last day. This is my last class," Jane smiled. "I put in my resignation."
"You what?" Maura stammered.
She could hear some of the cadets chuckling and cooing behind her and for the first time heat flooded her cheeks. Jane put a comforting hand on the doctor's shoulder and looked out with authority to the rest of the room.
"Everyone out. Ten minute break, okay?" Jane instructed. Her commanding voice caused goosebumps to rise on Maura's skin. The former detective, gave her arm another comforting squeeze, sensing the doctor's nerves. When the last student filed out, Jane settled her gaze back on Maura. "That was some entrance."
"Jane, what do you mean you put in your resignation?" she asked. She was too shocked to say anything else.
"I was wrong to leave," Jane told her. "I don't want to lose you again. And as much as I'm afraid that I won't be able to protect you, it's not worth wasting anymore time. I promised you in that cabin that we wouldn't waste any more time."
"So you're coming back?" Maura asked. A lump formed in her throat. "You're coming back to Boston?"
"I'm coming back to you – wherever that is. You're my home," Jane said, sniffling herself now. "I love you."
Maura didn't say it back and instead placed both hands on Jane's cheeks, pulling her in for a kiss. Her lip were warm and familiar. The touch of skin filled her body with excitement and she embraced Jane as if she may never hold her again. When they pulled away, an errant, unstoppable thought flashed across her mind.
"I think you should move in," Maura said abruptly.
The words slipped out unconsciously, but the idea felt right as soon as she verbalized it. If Jane was coming back to Boston, Maura wanted all of her. She wanted their life to begin immediately. She gaged Jane's reaction, worried that she'd been too forward.
"I think we should get married," Jane replied just as impulsively.
The doctor's mouth dropped. If Jane wasn't holding her, she may have wavered on her weak hip.
"You don't have to say anything now. It's just all I could think about once I got here. It's why I knew I had to quit and come back home…"
"Yes," Maura interrupted.
"What-what?" Jane stammered.
"I think we should get married too," the doctor said breathlessly.
Jane smiled wider and her dimples went deeper than Maura had ever seen. Her heart was light with a happiness she'd never felt. Everything in her, the world around them, suddenly made sense. Every heartbreak, every missed opportunity, and challenge that led them to that moment felt worth it. Joyful tears filled Maura's gaze. Jane kissed her softly, not letting go. When she pulled back, she appeared just as emotional but managed to reign herself back in.
"Will you stay while I finish teaching this last class?" she asked.
"Of course, Jane," Maura whispered with a gentle smile.
Thank you for reading and reviewing! I'm having fun writing this one and a lot more Rizzles fluff is ahead, along with some developments in the Denton case. Side note - I definitely picture Noah Centineo as Owen. I'll be flushing him and the other Rizzles kids out as we go along too. - SJ