It feels like five dozen sunrises since Neru last sat on her assigned butt torture seat. It was just one week, but it was the first time she has gone to a sesion and there wasn't an obnoxious social butterfly sitting by her side. She didn't think it would be this bad, that it wouldn't be so quiet without Lily. Neru never noticed till then that Luka might have been the one to start off the meetings by asking questions, but it was Lily who kept the conversations going with Miku backing her up. They kept the talking alive by being their usual selves and speaking about any and everything that happened to them.

"U-Umm…Where's Miku?" Haku asks, breaking the silence with a whisper that sounded like a yell in the silent room.

"She is not going to come today. It's just you four." Luka replies instantly, her eyes going from her clipboard to Haku and back.

Any other day Neru would be glad to see neither of the missing girls, but today, stuck in a room with wallflowers that made the clock slow with their breathing, she hates that she misses them. Dealing with them was better than dealing with this. And then, when Neru has just about given up all hope on listening to a sound, someone speaks up.

"Can I be excused for today?"

It was the quiet guy, the one she forgot existed. He looks about as banged up as he did on day one. Has he always been here? She couldn't remember him ever speaking up. All she really remembers is Lily and Miku, with an occasional mutter from Dell or Haku. Speaking of him, Neru gave Dell a side long glance, wondering if he recognizes the silent sixth member of their group. Looks like he does, because Dell appears about as uninterested as he does every meeting.

Why was it that even after a perfectly nice not-date Neru still finds herself wishing physical harm on Dell?

"What's your excuse?" Luka asks, effectively bringing anyone whose mind might have wandered away back to where they belong.

"Cold much?"she thinks as she stares at the guy with too-purple-to-be-true eyes. He was pretty handsome, she'd give him that much. It was just the bandages that threw her off. That and he just…there was something about him, something she couldn't explain that she didn't quite like. It wasn't like he gave off the sort of persona that made her automatically hate him, like Dell or Miku, nor the sort that made her feel annoyed, like Gumi or Haku. He…didn't make her feel anything?

As Neru would come to see someday, her perception of her emotions towards certain people was a bit skewed.

"I'm not going to waste my time here. I don't need counseling." He replies.

It isn't just Luka that gives him a look. All of them do, and their looks may represent different thoughts, some nice and some not so nice, but they all have the same message; 'you cannot be serious'.

"U-Umm…Neru?"

Neru's plans of ditching her job for the day and reuniting with her soothingly warm bed shatters from the touch of a hand on her shoulder. She turns around, mildly surprised to see Haku.

"We...I think I have an idea a-and I wanted to go through it with you…If that's okay…" Haku says, her words going from average volume to a mumble towards the end.

If it were any other person Neru would have flicked them the bird and left. She was seriously craving a nap after being forced to stay away doing nothing for hours, but it's Haku, and as much as she wants to go to sleep she can't find it in herself to refuse an old friend. She also finds herself silent. Neru could simply said yes and hear Haku then and there, but her mind flashes an image of Lily's hand hanging inches from a phone, hesitating.

She doesn't want to be that Lily.

"Want to talk it over at my place? My mom won't mind."

Any bit of self-consciousness Neru tried to push away by wearing a nonchalant facial expression faded when she saw Haku's growing smile. Then it came right back when Haku's front teeth bit down on her bottom lip.

"I…" Was Haku hesitating? Neru knew that her home wasn't exactly the best, especially with her lame father living there, but that didn't mean she expected to get a rejection. Neru definitely didn't expect to see Haku's smile come back as she picks up where she left off.

"Would love to. I just think it would…Well if you want to…Be better to come over to my house…?"

Neru stares at her, more shocked than ever. Haku might have hesitated a bit in the beginning but there it was, Haku being assertive; a feat Neru never imagined. Was therapy actually working?

"Y-You don't have to come i-if you do-"

"I'd love to go to your house…As long as there's free food and a warm bed to nap on."

Seeing that timid smile, the sort that shows Haku was trying to smirk but couldn't quite figure out how to do it, reminds Neru just how much she has missed her old friend.

Walking through the front door of Haku's home is like a slap in the face. It hits Neru hard, the realization that Haku had been to her home at least five times while this is the first time she's seen her home. How could she have not realized this before? It strengthens the point that Haku has changed ever so slightly. Haku's not out of her shell but she's poking her nose out of it and Neru has been too busy trying to avoid everything that causes her discomfort to see the change. It sting, and it goes to show her how stupid she was to keep prolonging a much needed confrontation.

Haku walks towards her silver refrigerator and pulls out a carton of milk along with some frosted sugar cookies. "I know it's not much you must be hungry after…you know…" She hesitates, never quite able to bring herself to say the word 'therapy' even if she has been attending the sessions for over three months.

Pale fingers set the plastic container and carton on a silver kitchen island before rummaging through beige cupboards for some cups. "I also hope you don't mind plastic cups," she mutters "I don't have too many cups and the ones I do have are chipped or dirty…"

Only when she serves two cups of cold milk and takes a cookie in her hand is when Haku notices the bizarre lack of conversation in the room.

"Uh...N-Neru…?"

"I'm sorry."

Those words left Haku lost, listening, and biting her lip to stop herself from saying something that could make Neru stop talking.

"I shouldn't have stopped talking to you. I should have told you that I–" Oh no, she was stuttering like Haku now. "I felt like I was clinging too much to you while you cared more about drinking than me..." Neru looks directly at Haku, hazel meets ruby, as her fingers clutch the hem of her skirt while she tries her best to look as serious as can be when she's internally retreating.

Few people knew this, she being a professional at masking this flaw, but just like Haku, Neru was painfully shy. It especially shows when she evades situations while never admitting when she was wrong. Neru made it look as though she was stubborn when in fact she was just too fearful of what came when she showed signs of weakness. The last thing she wants is to receive pitying stares like Haku has.

"I-" Neru pauses, all the words she imagined saying to Haku in the middle of the night when her mistakes haunted her evaporated as Haku's arms settled around her.

"It's okay."

"Wait, what?"

"I…I think that…that…" Haku takes a deep breath. It was difficult enough saying it once. "I think that to get out of therapy we have to prove ourselves. I think if we show that we don't have what we have then Miss. Megurine will let us go…"

"You know that's not the part I wanted to hear again."

Haku takes another light blue frosted cookie from the container and bites it. Not the best solution to avoiding a conversation, but she'll take however many seconds of stalling she can even if it means having to face Neru's scowl longer.

"Well…I…I want to go to this event. It's for a group of people who try to write a book in a month. I always wanted to go but I've been too shy and…and I was hoping that you could go with me, f-for moral support…if that's okay…?"

"And how is this supposed to prove that you're cured?"

If Haku had a shell, her head would sink as far back into it as possible.

"We-Well, cured is such a st-strong word...I d-don't even think we have mental illnesses…bu-but mines is…is…"

"What? Antisocial disorder?"

"N-No! That disorder has a different meaning than you think it does…" She sighs, her head slowly lifting itself from her shoulders. "I have major depressive disorder…an-and I think that if I go to this event and make new friends, m-maybe…maybe I can gain some confidence and Miss. Megurine will see that I've improved."

"Wait…I thought you're in the group because of your alcoholism?" Neru asks as she reaches out for another cookie.

"Well…That was a part of it…But I realized that my al-…that was just a part of my depression…I've been like this ever since my-" Her eyes widen as Neru's left eyebrow rises. Throat dry, she grabs her glass of milk and takes a long gulp. "…For a long time, and when…when we stopped talking, I slowly realized that I couldn't keep living like I was…You showed me how nice it was to have friends, a-and I want to…I want to be able to be like you."

Neru stops chewing her cookie, almost stops breathing; all her attention that had already been on Haku is on her again, this time intensified tenfold.

"I want to be courageous. Because Neru, that's what you are…You may be negative and secretive –n-no offence! But you face your problems, even if you don't want to…I mean, just look at what you did today. You talked to me again, even though it made you feel negative you did it. I want to be like that too…Like you and like Lily too."

Haku watches, shy, hesitant, and fearful of what Neru might do or say next. Her hands reach for another cookie, try to distract herself, but she settles on drinking her cup of milk after almost spilling it in her haste to get another cookie. It isn't alcohol, and even though a part of Haku wishes it was, she's glad it isn't. The last thing she needs is to go back to the bad habit she's been trying to kick for months. While Haku thinks of this, Neru keeps staring, awe-struck.

She never thought of herself as courageous. It's Haku who is the brave one for saying what she honestly thinks and feels, stutter and all. Neru rarely did that, today being one of those seldom times. But, as always, she doesn't quite know how to say it, so lets her thoughts out in a blunt manner because if she thinks too hard about how to talk without hurting other people's feelings and the like then she'll never say or do what she wants.

Was that what courage was?

"You sound desperate." She watches Haku slouch again. She knows that her comment was definitely harsh, especially the way her voice adds a certain edge that she never understood where it came from, but she goes on and watches as Haku rises up from her turtle position. "But I'll tag along. Just don't expect me to socialize with you."

"Th-Thank you, Neru." She squeaks, hugging Neru from her seat.

Neru hugs her back. She sees just how happy Haku is from her answer and how much she has spoken, how much of what she wants she has said. Neru wonders if she has changed as well. A part of her hope she has, another part fears it.

A/n:

Hello everyone and happy day before Thanksgiving! I don't have much to say except a question. I noticed that the last few chapters have raised more confusion and questions than I expected. To combat this I wrote an entire chapter dedicated to answering all the questions I saw on the reviews. Should I publish it?

Thank you for reading :)