A/N: Hey, everyone. This is for three days ago, I believe. I have something next to post up that's sort of long, and will sort of count for yesterday and today because of its length. I swear I won't fall behind again. I'll try to post up two things tomorrow.
Genre: General/Humor
Pairings: I. Tucker/Church; II. Grif/Simmons, Sister/Doc; III. Church/Donut; IV. Grif/Donut/Simmons; V. Slight Church/Tucker; VI. Sister/Doc/Donut, Sister/Sarge Donut, Sister/Tucker/Donut, slight Church/Tucker
Rating: PG-13/T
Summary: High School: The Oddest Frontier.
Warnings: Slash, het, cursing, allusions to sex and threesomes, odd sexual innuendo, ghosts and ghost sex, ribbons, string, sluts, and the usage of the words bondage and foreplay.

School Days Haze
(Set Ten)

(I)

"Okay," Pillows said, cutting a strand of white string. "The object of the game is for you and your partner to get your string free from each other."

She tied said string around everyone's wrists like handcuffs, making sure each pair was connected. When she got to Tucker and Church, she paused.

"You two are probably used to this, huh?" she asked with an amused smirk.

"Yeah, and I'm a pro at getting out of handcuffs," Tucker told her. Church groaned.

"Thinking before speaking, Tucker. What have I told you about that?"

"Start doing it?"

"Exactly."

Chuckling, their teacher tied the string.

"You know," Tucker said when she was done, "this would make for great foreplay." The woman paused again.

"You're right," she mused. "Well, begin your foreplay, then." She stood aside and watched her students' attempts.

"Okay," Church instructed, "just do what I say."

"See? Just like foreplay."

"Shut up, Tucker."

Church brought Tucker's string over his head, then his own over the taller boy's. He then twisted his body around so his back was pressed against Tucker's stomach.

"Do you even know what you're doing?" Tucker asked skeptically as the boy in question tried to get a leg over one of their -he didn't know which- strings.

"Yes, goddamn it, so don't break my concentration," Church snapped. Tucker, grinning, only rolled his eyes.

Ten minutes, many odd maneuvers that made no sense, and plenty of curses passed, in which the two found each other pressed front-to-front; they couldn't wiggle free.

"Congratulations, boys," Pillows said, clapping. "You two have earned the title of Bondage Kings."

"Hey, at least we won something."

"I hate you, Tucker. I hate string."

(II)

"No. Oh, no. Kerry, there's a strict no-boys-allowed-in-your-room policy, remember?"

"Grif, we're just gonna study," the girl told her older brother.

"Yeah, that's what me an' Simmons said yesterday and guess what we ended up doing."

"I know. I heard."

"For the record, I actually planned on studying," Simmons said.

"And you have no willpower, but I do," Kerry protested.

"Er, we could just study out here so Grif knows we're doing what we say," Doc suggested awkwardly.

"Don't cave in, Doc. Then Grif will never let me have any fun."

"What's so fun about studying?" Grif questioned suspiciously. His sister just rolled her eyes.

"She's sixteen," Simmons reminded. "I think she's old enough to be in a room alone with a boy. Besides, Doc doesn't have a one track mind like somepeople." He looked pointedly at the older boy.

"Whatever," Grif waved off. "Fact of the matter is, no boys in your room. Unless you let me put a surveillance camera-"

"No."

"So no boys then."

"Simmons, can't you make Grif be reasonable?" Kerry begged. The freckled boy laughed.

"Please, then he wouldn't be Grif."

Ignoring them, Grif glared at Doc, causing the other boy to shift from foot-to-foot uncomfortably. Finally, Doc spoke up.

"I don't believe in pre-marital sex, if that helps," he told the brunette. Kerry looked at him like a kicked puppy denied food.

"You're a teenage guy; I'm gonna gave to call bullshit on that one."

"It's true!" Doc argued. "Well, I mean, it exists, I know that. But I don't practice it. And that's fine because, you know, abstinence makes the heart grow fonder. Don't you agree?"

No one replied; Kerry let out a small whimper, her brother still glared harshly at Doc, whereas Simmons tried to hold back his laughter.

"Erm, I'd never touch her in any way she didn't want," Doc continued unsurely. "And besides, it's not like Kerry has a large, um, sex drive…"

The girl covered her face with her hands to muffle a shriek. Simmons had to bite his bottom lip. Grif meanwhile, clenched his hazel eyes shut.

After a beat Grif told him, "Just…just shut up and make-out with Kerry or something." Kerry looked incredulously at her older brother.

"Really?" she asked hopefully.

"As long as I don't have to listen to Doc anymore, then yeah, whatever."

"Thank you, Grif!" the girl called out as she grabbed the befuddled Doc by his arm and dragged him away.

When they were gone, Grif sat down at the table next to Simmons with an exhausted sigh. The other boy looked at him curiously. After a minute he spoke up.

"So, you realize they're upstairs right now. Alone."

"Yeah." A beat. Grif shot up in his seat. "Holy fuck, they're upstairs alone!"

"Sit down, Grif," Simmons ordered, pushing him back into the seat.

(III)

"Church, hold still," Donut requested, holding out a blue ribbon.

"Are you going to choke me with that?" the older boy asked suspiciously.

"Why does everyone ask that? 'Sides, I'm not into necrophilia."

"Fine," Church agreed, sitting still in his chair.

"Hey, what would you call sex with a zombie?" Grif asked suddenly. The others looked at him, flabbergasted.

"Grif, your Christmas present to me can be to never ask that question ever again while I'm around," Simmons told him, fingers pinching the bridge of his nose.

"S'long as I get x-mas sex," the brunette agreed. Simmons let out a heavy breath.

Giggling, Donut went up behind Church and, draping the ribbon across his shoulders, took the older boy's black hair in his hands. He gathered the hair as best he could into a pony tail; it was small, most of Church's shaggy black locks falling all over the place. Donut took the blue ribbon and tied it into a bow, keeping his new pony tail in place.

"There. Now your hair is all pretty," the blonde told him, giving Church a compact mirror so he could see as well.

"Why would you let Donut do that?" Grif questioned.

"Hey, I'll let the guy I'm fucking do whatever he wants with my hair," Church answered.

"Sex greater than dignity?"

"Always."

(IV)

Grif crept up behind Donut with a devious grin on his face. His hand darted out at the pink ribbon in blonde hair, grabbing an end of the bow. He pulled it, and it unraveled.

"Hey!" Donut exclaimed, hand shooting to where the ribbon had been. He spun around at Grif. "Give it back!" he demanded.

"Tch. No."

"Please, Grif. I had it just right," the younger boy whined.

"I know. That's why I did it."

"Oh, you jerk."

Donut lunged at the ribbon, only to have the laughing Grif hold it out of his reach. After a few minutes more of failed attempts, the younger boy took a step back, arms crossed in a pouting manner.

"Oh, I hate you, Grif."

"You're masochistic-you love me."

Donut stuck his tongue out at the older boy. He saw Simmons not too far off and rushed over to him.

"Simmons, Grif stole my ribbon!"

"What am I, your mother?"

"You're the guy who could get the hot blonde all to himself tonight if you play your cards right," Donut told him, hinting. Simmons rolled his green eyes.

"I'm not Grif-sex isn't my only motivation."

"Hey! I resent that," said boy huffed indignantly.

"Goddamn it, just give me my ribbon," Donut demanded, stomping a foot.

Smirking, Grif threw the pink ribbon at Simmons, yelling out, "Catch!"

"Give it to me, Simmons!"

"Why do I have to be in the middle of this?"

"You wouldn't have to if I had my ribbon," the blonde pointed out.

"And what if I don't give it to you?" Simmons challenged.

In answer, Donut tackled him to the ground. Straddling the startled boy, he snatched an end of the ribbon, trying to yank it out of Simmons grasp. Grif, meanwhile, couldn't help but laugh.

"Come on; just give me my ribbon," Donut said, each word punctured by a pull on desired object.

"You're on top of me," Simmons pointed out the obvious.

"And you can be on top of me later," the younger boy promised. "Now gimme."

"Can I be worked into that equation?" Grif asked hopefully.

"You're the one who stole it to begin with!"

"So?"

"You don't get a taste of my frosting for a long time," Donut told the brunette in a huff.

"Odd sexual innuendo aside, can you get off of me now?" Simmons requested. "At least until we're not in the library?"

(V)

Church woke up, hearing a thud at his window as if something hard had hit it. He groggily opened his dark blue eyes, turning to see his alarm clock; the red numbers were laughing "3:48" at him.

There was another thud and Church got up to see what it was. As he opened the window, a small rock smacked into his forehead.

Reeling back and clutching where he'd been hit, Church exclaimed, "Shit!"

"Oops. Sorry, Church!" a disembodied voice apologized.

Church leaned out of the window and looked down for who had hit him. Tucker waved up at him.

"Son of a bitch, Tucker! I swear I'm gonna fuckin' kill you."

"Can I come up?" the mocha skinned boy asked, impervious to his friend's threats.

"Yeah, whatever. Door's unlocked," Church told him, going back inside and closing his window.

Tucker quickly went to the front of the house and ran up the porch steps. He turned the knob, opened the door, and took a step in.

"Ow!" he exclaimed when something collided with the back of his head.

Rubbing the injured spot, Tucker turned to Church incredulously. "What the hell was that for?"

"The rock."

"Oh, right. Sorry 'bout that," he apologized again. He came inside fully, closing the door behind him.

"So why the hell are you here so damn early?" Church questioned, going to the living room and plopping down on the couch.

"Parents not home?" Tucker followed the other boy, sitting down next to him.

"Never are," he replied. "Answer the question." Tucker took a deep breath before telling him what he wanted to know.

"My mom's pregnant."

"Aren't your parents divorced?"

"Yeah, and I don't know which guy got her knocked up," Tucker added.

"'Which guy'? How many has she fucked lately?"

"At least ten different guys," he said off-handedly.

"Fuck," Church whistled. She had him beat. "So that's where you get it."

"Shut up, Church!"

"What? I'm just saying you're a slut."

"Do you have any right to speak?"

"Hey, I never said I wasn't one."

"Whatever, just move over," Tucker said.

"Hell no. I'm too fuckin' tired to go back upstairs; I'm sleeping here."

To reinforce his point, Church brought his legs over and laid them across Tucker's lap. He leaned back so his head was up against the arm rest and closed his eyes.

"Whatever," Tucker mumbled, trying to get as comfortable as he could.

(VI)

"It'd be awesome to come back as a ghost," Donut said.

"I'd totally haunt cute boys," Kerry agreed.

"Cute drama boys," the blonde added.

"Ooh, yeah! We should die and haunt the stage!" the girl suggested. The others at the table looked at them incredulously.

"If you're dead then you can't have sex, so that's fine by me," Grif told them.

"Hey, maybe we could have ghost sex," Kerry argued.

"How would that even work?" Simmons asked.

"In some totallyawesome way," Tucker spoke up. Simmons and Church rolled their eyes.

"Tucker, just don't speak," the latter ordered.

"Hey, Donut, maybe when we're ghosts we could have a threesome with someone," Kerry suggested eagerly. "Like Doc."

"Or Sarge."

"Or me," Tucker offered. He was smacked upside the head by both Grif and Church.

"Just make sure to come alone to the stage," Kerry told him with a wink.

"Oh, I think we could get him to come," Donut said suggestively.

As they giggled, Tucker beamed, Grif growled, Church crossed his arms in a sulking manner, and Simmons just rolled his green eyes at all of them.