Chapter Ten: Sharing Circle

While Jake walked quickly into the community centre, mindful of getting chairs together, Nathan and Lucas lagged behind.

They were headed toward another meeting of their Single Dad's group. Though in their earlier years they had gone together often, their visits had become less frequent of late. When they had first begun raising their daughters they had been desperate for any advice they could get, but later on found that the support of clueless fathers was something they no longer required. But this week they had mutually decided that it had been too long, and they could all do with some support for the recent trials in their lives.

They walked down to the basement of the community centre where their was a circle of chairs and a table with coffee and a small selection of cookies on it. Besides that and several people milling around, the room was empty.

The three men spoke briefly but companionably with the men they knew. Most were divorced, like Lucas, or abandoned, like Jake, but several were widowers as Nathan was. All shared a kinship, a common bond because of the difficult situation they all lived in every day. Nathan recalled his first few meetings, desperate to learn everything he could about bringing up a baby. Lucas had only joined him later on, desperate to how to learn how to braid hair and make sure his daughter never felt unloved.

They sat in chairs together as the room gradually filled and men made their way towards the centre of the room. There was little official structure to what went on. Mostly it was men confessing what they found difficult, other men inputting what they had learned from experience. Men commiserating about what had happened in their lives that had left them alone and raising children.

After listening to a father of a young son speak of his son's aggressive behavior in nursery school, and the father of a teenage girl speak of his daughter encountering clique problems in high school, Nathan stood up to speak.

"Hey, my name is Nathan Scott. For those of you who don't know I have an eleven year old daughter, Celia. Cecelia, actually. We live with my brother Lucas and his daughter, Cassie. And things are going pretty well."

Nathan paused, knowing there was no point in coming to say so little.

"So that's only sort of true. Things were going really well, but everything is more complicated now. I mean mostly for Lucas, but also for me. I'm dating someone, for the first time really since my wife died," he said, sparing a glance at an incredulous Lucas. "And I don't know what to tell Celia. I mean she said to me a while ago that she thought I should date, but I'm worried she'll be freaked out about it in actual practice. And I don't even know where it's going, so I don't want to mess with Celia's world if I don't have to."

"Does Celia know the woman you're dating?" asked the officiator of the group in interest. Nathan nodded reluctantly.

"Yeah, that's what makes it really complicated. She's her teacher. And she really likes her, but it's still weird."

One of the men in the circle nodded in apparent appreciation of this sentiment.

"I was dating my daughter's riding coach a few years ago, but she kept trying to sabotage it so in the end it didn't work out. And when my ex – wife found out all hell broke loose," he said sadly.

"I'm a widower," said Nathan defensively. "But I really like her. Haley. She understands the situation, and agrees that we shouldn't say anything to Celia yet. She's amazing."

Lucas watched his younger brother smile to himself, apparently in recollection. He was having trouble comprehending that his brother's shy, careful courtship had resulted in anything at all.

Nathan stood down, apparently done with sharing. Lucas stood up quickly.

"So I guess you know from that that I'm Lucas Scott, Nathan's brother. I have an eleven year old daughter named Cassie, I'm divorced and my ex – wife just showed up for the first time in years."

The crowd nodded appreciatively. Difficult marriage breakups was something they could almost all sympathize with.

"But it's complicated, because she's not Cassie's mother and Cassie is beginning to figure it out. She and Celia met her birth mother in a grocery store and she recognized them, so now Cassie is suspicious. And Peyton came back to try to figure things out with us, which is weird because I don't think she remotely wants to get back with me, and it's weird that she's trying so hard to bond with Cassie because she left pretty abruptly five years ago and hasn't had much interest since."

"As I recall Cassie was the result of an affair?" asked the group leader. Lucas nodded reluctantly. "Can't you understand how Peyton must be feeling? It would be very difficult to love a child who would be a constant reminder of her husband's infidelities, day after day. I can understand Peyton giving up after trying to for six years."

"She didn't just try. She loves Cassie."

"But only as much as you let her?" guessed the leader. Lucas frowned and dropped back into his seat.

"You guys live in a freaking soap opera..." muttered a man to Nathan's left.

The eyes of the group leader twinkled in amusement. He turned to Jake.

"Do you have any part in this drama? You're a friend, if I recall correctly," he said. Jake shook his head hurriedly. "No part at all?"

Nathan laughed.

"It's okay man. I told Lucas you were flirting with Peyton. He never loved her the same way after he met Brooke, anyway."

Lucas looked as if he were about to punch his brother, but managed to resist the urge as Jake stood.

"Hi. I'm Jake Jagielski and I have an eleven year old daughter named Jenny. Her mother left when she was born. I've recently made friends with Peyton, but quite frankly I wouldn't trust her enough to let her into my life just yet. I won't have Jenny abandoned by anyone else if I can help it," he said, almost fiercely.

"Peyton's not a quitter, Jake. She didn't abandon me so much as I abandoned her," said Lucas. Jake nodded, sat back down, and for the rest of the meeting all three were silent.

Lucas turned on his brother as soon as they were outside and away from the crowd.

"What the hell was that?" he demanded. "Last time I check all that was my business, not yours."

"You made it my business. What the hell are you doing, anyway? What's Peyton going to be able to fix, being here? She deserves to go on with her life. You both do. Clearly you're never going to get over Brooke, clearly Brooke is never going to get over you. I mean I'm not going to lie and say I approve, but it's your life."

"What are you, telling me to be brave? You couldn't even work up the guts to tell me you were dating Haley until..."

Jake reluctantly stepped in between them, clearly worried that Lucas would turn on him.

"Knock it off guys. This isn't helping anything," he said firmly.

"And you are? So you're hitting on my wife?" demanded Lucas of Jake.

"First of all she's not your wife and second of all no, I'm not. We talked. Once."

This burst of logic seemed to calm Lucas and he backed off several feet.

"You're dating Haley?" he asked slowly.

"Yeah. I would have told you, but it was kind of overshadowed by your drama," explained Nathan. Lucas nodded in understanding.

"Want to head home?" he asked.

"Nah. I need to clear my head. I think I'll head to Haley's, it isn't far," he said. Lucas nodded, and went toward the car with Jake trailing after him.

Nathan waited until they were gone and pulled out his cellphone. He stared at the number he had programmed into it days ago in preparation for this moment.

He dialed and waited for it to ring. Though he had never before spoken to her on the phone, her voice was instantly familiar to him.

"Brooke," he said flatly. He felt her recognize his own voice.

"Nathan?"

"Yeah. It's time for you to come back," he said abruptly. "Cassie needs a mother, and Lucas... needs you."

"I don't think I can."

"I don't think you have a choice. You're a mother, Brooke. Start acting like one."

He hung up the phone, feeling relatively pleased with himself. Tossing his cell back into his pocket, he began jogging toward Haley's house.