Chapter Ten.
I didn't want to think about it, but I find it is constantly on my mind. My every waking thought is about it and I cannot find peace. Martha is such a joy, I look at her and I feel peaceful, if only I could find that sort of peace away from her. The murders continue and I am feeling the strain, I cannot help but think that Lestrade was right after all, something is coming.
I keep returning to the promise I made that poor man that day in the rain, I promised I would leave London, then I thought he was merely a mad man, and that I was a random target for his ravings; but now? I cannot help but feel that I should take his warning seriously and leave, you may wonder what has prompted this sudden change of heart and I confess to being more than a little surprised at my sudden fear but I have a suspicion that these murders are not the work of a random killer but are aimed at me – at engaging my attention.
The murders are not random they are happening at places that are local to me – me and Holmes. Places we ate at, theatres we went to, every part of our lives mapped out by a trail of bodies, the bodies of beautiful women mutilated in spots that are unique to me. At first I thought my addled brain was inventing a problem that did not exist but as each murder appeared at a place I knew intimately, I began to see a pattern and today a startling thing happened, there was a note attached to the body. Lestrade had removed it to show me, it said 'I am sorry to hear of your loss. Those who love you are thinking of you.' Lestrade thinks it is connection with mary but what if it is in connection with Holmes? And those who love me? What does that mean? I am fearful. I do not know what to expect and I feel I should leave but I will not leave Martha I will not lose anyone else I love, my heart will not bear it.
The wind rattles through the house, I cannot sleep I can hear Martha breathing in the next room and I want to sob. What is happening to my world? A letter came for me after dinner, again expressing sorrow for my loss, the signature was Holmes' I am sure of it and yet…he is dead, this surely must be an impostor, it is not the first letter I have had from someone claiming to be Holmes but I confess that my heart lifted at the sight of his name. I cannot be hopeful, Holmes is dead I must keep repeating what I know to be true. Holmes is dead, Holmes is dead, Holmes is dead…
Sorry for the length of time between updates! Blame Jesus' crucifiction and subsequent fuss : ) Anywho Easter Eggs aside I've finally managed an update! Hope you all had an enjoyable and peaceful Easter and like this chapter! Reviews always welcome...