Note: I AM SO SORRY FOR THE LONG WAIT. And I do not blame you if you hate me and if you don't ever read this story anymore. I mean, what the hell is wrong with me? I am a super lame writer. Hate me. Please, I beg you, send me flames. SEND THEM. Anyway. Sorry I am. Please, kick my ass for my horrible rudeness of being late on this chapter.

Anyway. Here's to TEN wonderful chapters!

They were wonderful… right? XD

It gets better guys. Enjoy this. Please.

Sorry if it's not good enough by the way!

Hope for you; part one.

You stole my heart, and I can not shake, that you said I was your "Worst mistake".

What was he up too? Why was he getting closer to me?

I blinked and watched as he blocked me against the counter. Both of his arms on either side, keeping me from going anywhere. I began to think of many of the things he was planning. Was he going to murder me, like the sadistic asshole he was? But then again; why the hell would he do that after everything he's done for me? Was it all a lie… just to get me at my most vulnerable position so that he could have his way with me, and kill me? At that though, I began to get angry and narrowed my eyes.

I nearly choked when he leaned in to my ear. "I fucking hate you." he whispered.

I didn't react. I don't think I could have thought of any reaction really.

What was I supposed to do? I've been living in a dream world, actually believing that Cartman and I could be friends, I kept telling myself he really could change. Craig was right. Why don't a just listen to him? He's my best friend, he was only trying to help me, and I told him off like that. Cartman will always be a monster, how could I ever think he wasn't.

How could I be so foolish that I actually thought someone was there for me. Someone who cared about my life, someone who didn't want to see me fall into the black. No; he wanted to lift me up, make me believe that we could be friends, he made me think he cared by telling me I needed to stop doing drugs. He wanted me to think that I could go to him when I needed somewhere to stay.

I believe him, I fucking believed Eric Cartman.

He turned and walked away, just beside he exited the kitchen he looked over his shoulder.

"Get the hell out of my house, Jew."

I couldn't stand it. I wasn't going to allow him, of all people, to fuck with me like this.

"You're so fucking pathetic!" I screamed, my voice echoing.

He turned around completely, glaring, "I'm pathetic, whose the one who-"

"Don't even pull that shit on me! I'm not as pathetic as you are. Sure, what I've done has been really low, and rather lame of me, but it cant level up to what you've just done. To think, I thought you, of all the people in south park, I THOUGHT YOU COULD CHANGE. I had hope for you, Cartman. I had so much fucking hope for you, like I thought you had for me. Well you know what, eat your own fucking words, you dumb fat fuck-"

"Say another word about me being fat, and I swear to fucking god, I'll plant your face in the floor in an instant!" he walked up to me angrily and grabbed the collar of my shirt. I didn't flinch. I glared at him for a few moments. And then, I did it.

I spit in his face. Right on his cheek, which I could see he was shocked.

Dam, I was on the floor, Cartman on top of me, we were fighting, as always.

He tried punching me, but I moved, and then I tried to punch him. We continued to have a brawl on the kitchen floor, until I stopped and began to laugh. I couldn't help myself. I just laughed. And laughed. And laughed. And laughed my ass off. That dream will never happen. Ever. Now that this has happened, that dream was just a stupid fictional hope. Hope, that's all any of this was. Hope. Which has been shattered once more, by him.

"Get the fuck off me, lard-ass!" I shoved Cartman off of me, and dashed for the door, slipping my shoes and coat on quickly. I began to run down the street, shaking from not only the cold but because of my nerves and my boiling blood.

I can't believe what I was doing. Kenny's house was in the other direction.

So where the hell was I going?

I ended up at a house, a few blocks down from Cartman's. I couldn't knock on the door, no, I'd wake the whole house up. So I went to the back yard and climbed up the tree until I reached his window. Until I reached Stan Marsh's window. Why the hell would I come here? Stan and I were no longer friends. We were no longer speaking to each other. I hated Stan. Why would I come here? I reached out and tapped on the window. Nothing. I tapped again. Nothing.

Finally, I tapped a third time. Nothing. So I turned to go back down the tree.

"Kyle?" I froze.

I turned around, the cold freezing my falling tears onto my cheek. "Stan…"

"Kyle, what are you doing? Do you know what time it is?"

"Yes. I know what time it is…"

"Quick, get inside, it's freezing out here." he motioned for me to come in, so I did. I climbed inside the room and stood, looking around. It hadn't changed. It was plain and simple, like his room always was. I smiled a little, but it quickly faded. He sat down on his computer chair, looking at me. I sat down on his bed.

He opened his mouth to speak, "so… What is it? What's wrong dude?"

I laughed, though it was quiet. He hasn't called me dude in years. "Stan, I'm going to kill myself."

He raised an eyebrow. "You're what?"

TBC

Ending note: Okay. There it is. I just made this in like, a half an hour. I wanted to get it done for you guys since you've been waiting forever, I know it sucks, and it wasn't what you were hoping for. This is the first half. I'll work on the second half (which will be much longer) tomorrow. So please, sit tight. I love you guys. And sorry if you don't like it. If there are any mistakes. Please let me know. :D I love you!

*throws many gummybears at you guys* SORRY ONCE AGAIN. :D