Author's Note: Hi guys! So sorry for the week since my last post. I'm doing my best to keep writing around school, but I don't want to rush it and give you guys sub-par chapters. This one is a decent length, and it's both happy and sad. I figured y'all deserved a little sex for waiting so long, so you get plenty of that here. The next chapters will see progress made in their relationship, and will address some stuff that we saw in episodes, like Emily starting to look for a house. I look forward to reading your reviews! Thanks for sticking with me!
Emily's hands slid over the smooth skin of JJ's bare stomach, her shirt long since discarded on the floor. Their kisses had deepened as hands began to wander, reacquainting themselves with bodies long untouched. JJ remained straddling her, but Emily was in control, allowing her mouth to explore the curve of JJ's breasts, teasing her nipple with her tongue and enjoying the shiver her actions sent down JJ's spine. She trailed her hands down JJ's sides, coming to rest just below her bottom. With one swift move she flipped their positions, laying JJ down on the bed below her and moving her ministration lower. JJ let out a little giggle, smiling at Emily as she gave her a mischievous wink. This felt good, so very good. The early afternoon light filtering in through the windows highlighted the chestnut and amber in Emily's otherwise nearly jet-black hair, and it glowed behind her head giving her a haloed appearance. The room was warm but not uncomfortably so, and the feel of Emily's fingers against her naked skin felt incredible. In that moment JJ couldn't imagine anywhere in the world she'd rather be.
"Come 'ere Em." she husked, reaching down and pulling Emily up her body until she lay against her, supporting her weight on her elbows, her fingers stroking the strands of JJ's golden hair that sprawled out across the pillow. Their kisses were deep and intimate, their tongues playing over each other's lips. Emily's hand began to descend, tracing the line of JJ's hip bone. Though her whole body craved this touch and she could feel the wetness between her legs growing she had to stop Emily. She needed to do this right. "Wait, stop." She reached down and stilled Emily's hand. Emily's felt her stomach lurch at JJ's words. Was this not what she wanted? JJ cupped Emily's cheek and brushed the hair out of her eyes, gently tucking it behind her ear. She repeated the motion several times while her eyes traced the shape of Emily's face.
"JJ I'm sorry, I thought this was what you wanted. If you're not ready..." Emily was silenced by a quick kiss.
"It's not that hun, I just want to do this right this time. It been so long and that last time was...well, I've regretted that for a long time." A look of sadness crossed Emily's face as she thought back to the last time and realization dawned in her eyes. JJ continued, "I shouldn't have come here that night, not after everything, and not the way I did."
"JJ I don't blame you for what happened that night. I wasn't in a good place, I could have stopped you, sent you home, but I didn't. That was my choice."
"I told myself, at first, that I just needed to make sure you were ok but that was a lie. I needed you to make me feel something. I was drowning and I decided you could save me."
"I've been there Jayje, and we both made mistakes in the past. But that's all it is now, the past." Emily leaned in to kiss along JJ's collarbone tenderly. "I'm just glad you're here now."
"Me too. I'm sorry it took me so long." A smile with an edge of sadness played on her lips as she kissed the top of Emily's head. "Now, let me repay you for your patience." With that she rolled them, topping Emily once again. Emily gave a throaty laugh which instantly warmed JJ's heart.
"I am anything but patient JJ, or don't you remember?"
"Well I'm going to make up for last time then, and all the times I missed out on since." She sat back and admired what lay below her. Emily's skin was a beautiful porcelain and she wore her scars like badges of honor, letting them tell the story of what she had survived, of how strong she was. Her breasts were full and as JJ surveyed them she was pleased to see the way the skin around her nipples puckered as they swelled, their color darkening with her aroused pulse. She could see the rise and fall of Emily's chest change pace as her breathing increased in anticipation. Emily squirmed beneath her ever so slightly. 'Impatient indeed' JJ thought with a grin before diving down to enveloped Emily's swollen nipple with her lips. Emily moaned softly, arching her back and closing her eyes. JJ moved one hand to begin massaging Emily's other breast, intent on stretching out her teasing as long as possible. She was going to show Emily just how much she had missed her. She felt Emily's fingers creeping towards her center and she reached down to grab her wrist, pushing her arm up above her head.
"Uh, uh, uh, Prentiss. You just lie back and enjoy. No touching." She moved Emily's other hand up above her head as well, and for just a minute thought about making use of the cuffs that sat on the bedside table before deciding that it might be a little too much too soon. Emily gave an overly-exasperated sigh and pouted but didn't resist.
"Yes ma'am, Agent Jareau." A sparkle in her eyes told JJ that she was enjoying this. With one hand still holding Emily's wrists, JJ began kissing down Emily's jaw-line, nipping at her pulse point before continuing down and returning to her breast. She let her tongue dance over the already hard nipple, coaxing it to rise even further while she allowed her free hand to caress the skin by Emily's hip bone. Her own body hummed with desire, electricity shooting through her each time her breasts touched Emily's skin, the heat growing as her center slid against the thigh that Emily had snuck between her legs. She moaned against the nipple in her mouth, her hips moving in sync with Emily's leg, putting pressure on her swollen clit. She pulled back and looked into Emily's eyes, finding no walls between them to shroud the desire and love shining from her sex-darkened orbs. She kept eye contact as her fingers slid between folds so incredibly wet it made her gasp. She felt Emily's hips begin to move beneath her, placing her clit in contact with JJ's fingers. She let out a deep moan, head tilting back at the sensation. JJ traced circles around the sensitive nub, flicking over it occasionally and relishing in the jerking thrusts it caused. She was careful not to give in to Emily's desire for direct contact, enjoying bringing her arousal to the brink and then back off over and over again.
"JJ let me touch you." Emily pleaded, shear erotic hunger in her eyes.
"Oh no, not yet." JJ smirked and before Emily could protest she slid a finger deep inside and watched as Emily's head rocked back, one arm escaping JJ's grasp and shooting back to grip the headboard. JJ allowed her finger to stay where it was for a moment, taking in the tight heat and feeling more at home and at peace in that moment than she had in months. Finally, pulling out slowly and then, watching Emily's reaction, she slid in a second finger and saw her grip tighten on the headboard, her mouth falling open in a soundless moan. Steadily she increased the speed of her movement, curling her fingers slightly with each stroke. Emily's heart was hammering in her chest at this point, her pulse like thunder in her veins and she felt a tightening in her core. It was rare that JJ took control like this, and even rarer that Emily's surrendered it. She felt her mind fighting to take over, to keep her body from giving in to the intense pleasure she was feeling. She wriggled her remaining hand out of JJ's hold and dipped it, without hesitation, between JJ's thighs. Before she could gain entrance to her center, JJ recaptured her hand and held on tight, interlacing their fingers.
"Let me love you Emily." JJ's eyes locked with hers as she spoke. "I've got you, let go." She could see the fear in Emily's eyes and it broke her heart. "Trust me Emily. I've got you." She repeated as she continued her thrusts, adding to them her thumb stroking along Emily's clit. She could feel the last of Emily's fight go out of her as she let herself open to JJ and her muscles began to spasm around JJ's fingers.
"Jayje..." Emily gasped as her body arched of its own accord and, the hand holding JJ's tightened its grip impossibly.
"Look at me Em, I'm right here." Doing as she was told Emily held JJ's gaze as she felt herself flailing over the edge of ecstasy. An almost primal cry escaped her lips as her skin flushed with orgasm. Her mind went blank as wave after wave of overflowing joy crashed over her. All it took was the sight of Emily cumming beneath her and the sustained pressure from her thigh to set JJ off herself, moaning as her body gave out from the unexpected release and she collapsed. She left her fingers in place as she panted, trying to catch her breath and feeling Emily doing the same beneath her. She smiled, relaxing further as she felt Emily's hand begin to stroke through her hair. Ever so gently she retracted her fingers, hearing the quivering in Emily's breathing as she did.
"That was...different...and amazing." Emily spoke once she'd finally regained enough of her wits to put more than two words together into a sentence.
"Mmmhmm." was all JJ could managed in response. For several minutes they stayed as they were, sweaty bodies pressed together, feeling the thrumming of their pulses align. At long last JJ spoke, "I can't believe it took me so long to come back to you. This feels like home to me Em. You feel like home." A tear slipped from her eye and ran down her cheek and she was uncertain whether it was one of happiness or sadness, or perhaps just relief.
"You're the only thing that's ever felt like home to me." Emily was almost too scared to admit this and shocked herself by saying it out loud before her brain could get control of her mouth. She couldn't shake the thought that this wouldn't last, that just like every time before she would put up her defenses and cut ties before she could get hurt, or JJ would go home to Will and realize the mistake she was making. "JJ, I don't want this to be goodbye..." JJ sat up and grabbed Emily hands roughly, her expression one of seriousness and absolute sincerity.
"Emily Prentiss you listen to me. I love you. This was not some fling or a last hurrah. This is what I want. You are who I want. And if you so much as think of leaving me again..."
"Ok, ok! Sorry. I just, I didn't want this to be like last time. It's not a fling for me either Jayje. You're all I want, I'm with you." Emily's eyes were soft and loving and JJ's momentary panic subsided. She didn't even want to fathom having to say goodbye to Emily ever again. But then there was Will, and Henry...just as she felt her panic returning Emily's cell rang from the nightstand. Glancing over and seeing that it was Garcia's office number she reached for it and handed the phone to Emily, figuring it was about work. Emily took the phone with a look of annoyance at being pulled out of their perfect afternoon and answered it in her best "Agent Prentiss" voice.
"Prentiss. Yes Garcia, I'm at home. We're supposed to have the whole weekend off so you'd better have a good reason for disturbing me. What? No Will hasn't called me. Why would he call me?"
JJ's heart dropped and she jumped out of bed at the mention of her boyfriend's name. Why was Garcia asking Emily about Will? She frantically began searching the clothes scattered on the floor trying to find her phone, continuing to listen to Emily's conversation.
"Um, no, I don't know where JJ is. I haven't seen her since I left the yesterday, but she was still in her office. You did what Garcia? In her desk? Penelope don't panic, she's a big girl, I'm sure she's fine. She probably just forgot it, you know how she is, and then went out with some friends and lost track of time. Yes I'll let you know if I hear from her. But promise me you won't go calling the rest of the team about this until we give her a little longer to show up. Pen she's probably going to walk through those doors with a hangover in search of her phone any minute now. You know how JJ gets when she's challenged to a game of darts. Yes, I promise. Goodbye Garcia." Emily hung up the phone and tossed it aside, looking up to find JJ pulling on one of her tops from the closet over yesterday's underwear.
"What was that about Will?" JJ asked as she turned her attention to finding the pants she'd been wearing yesterday.
"Will called Garcia looking for you this morning. He said you never came home and hadn't answered your cell phone since yesterday afternoon. Garcia went in to work to look for you, when she didn't find you she panicked and tracked your phone and found that in your desk drawer on vibrate with about a hundred calls and texts from Will. He thought you might have gotten stuck on a case but after finding out from Garcia that we were all sent home early yesterday I think you're going to have to come up with another excuse for avoiding him." Emily's voice was flat and emotionless, her walls sliding back into place to keep her terror at the reminder of Will and JJ's 'real' life well hidden. Having located her pants and slipped them on, JJ turned her full attention back to Emily, seeing the professional mask firmly in place where just moments ago had been the open and fragile Emily she loved, who loved her.
"I have to go home." was all she could say, knowing there was no way to make this right in the moment. Emily gave a curt nod, pulling the covers up slightly, subconsciously wanting to cover her body. JJ moved to the edge of the bed and leaned over, placing a tender kiss on her lips. "I'm sorry." she whispered. It seemed a phrase she said too often and she doubted whether it actually did anything to make up for all the hurt she'd caused. Emily kissed her back but didn't say anything. JJ stood to leave, feeling an overwhelming sense of guilt and the intense desire not to leave this room, this bubble of tranquility they had created over the past several hours. She looked out the window, desperate for an easy fix.
"Go, JJ. I understand." Emily spoke softly
"This is going to get messy, isn't it?" JJ asked sheepishly, still staring out the window as if she might find the solution to all of this if she just looked hard enough.
"This started messy Jayje." Emily answered, gazing down at her hands as she began to pick at her nails. JJ avoided eye contact as she scanned the room for anything she might be forgetting before heading into the living room to collect the last of her belongings. Emily couldn't bring herself to get up as she listened to JJ gathering her things. She wasn't sure why she'd lied to Garcia. Couldn't she have just told her the truth? Or not the truth exactly, but she could have said JJ was with her, that'd they been out the night before and the night got away from them. It was her guilty conscience that made a lie come easier than the truth, and she wondered whether that should set off warning bells. After all, if what they were doing was right, was what was meant to be, why would she feel so damn guilty about it all? She wasn't the one with a dedicated boyfriend and child waiting at home. She was doing no harm to anyone by being with JJ. Even as she thought it she couldn't make herself believe it, wasn't able to honestly say that she didn't feel like JJ's cheating wasn't somehow her doing, her fault, a result of her seduction, in the first place. Then again, would it be so bad if they were caught red handed? At least they'd be together and they could stop lying. Lying, it seemed, was always what Emily's life boiled down to.
"Emily?" JJ's voice drifted back to her from the entry way.
"Yeah?"
"This isn't goodbye. Promise me this isn't goodbye."
"I promise." Emily heard the door creak open and then three last words reached her ears,
"I love you." With that JJ was gone, the door clicking shut behind her. Emily flopped back onto her pillow playing JJ's words over and over in her head like a mantra, 'this isn't goodbye. this isn't goodbye.' She rolled over and reached for the pillow JJ had been sleeping on just hours before, bringing it to her face and inhaling her scent. She closed her eyes, suddenly completely drained and grateful that she wasn't expected anywhere that day. Within minutes she had drifted off, clutching the pillow to her chest like a life preserver, the mantra still running through her mind.
'This isn't goodbye, this isn't goodbye, this isn't goodbye..."