A/N: =D

Sakura sighed happily as she lowered herself into the steaming hot bathtub. This was literally her first bath in over three months. The last time she took a bath was the day before the funeral. And since then it had been hop into the shower, clean herself as fast as she could, and then hop back out.

She just had too many things to do.

Namely, a baby to take care of.

But now that her brother-in-law was home earlier after his promotion, she had time to soak in the bathtub.

Pulling her knees up to her chin, she wrapped her arms around her legs and rested her chin atop her knees. She sighed. It's been a little over three months. Only three months. Time seemed to drag on after the funeral. It almost became unbearable.

But at the same time, it seemed like she didn't have enough time. There just wasn't enough time to wake up early, prepare bentous for her and her brother-in-law, get Mari ready for Ami, go to school, come back home, go grocery shopping, make dinner, feed Mari, eat dinner, bathe Mari, put her to sleep, make sure her brother-in-law was in bed correctly, clean the house, take a shower herself, do homework, study, take care of a crying Mari who woke up in the middle of the night from a nightmare, and go to bed in the middle of the night only to wake up a few hours later to do it all over again.

She groaned and rubbed her temples, she got a headache just from thinking about all of it.

Time was such a strange thing.

It's already been three months.

Mari was finally sleeping peacefully at night, her first few baby teeth were almost all grown out and her others were starting to grow in, she took her first steady steps and will soon be on her way to running around everywhere, she even said her first word a few days ago. Mama.

Sakura scoffed. Her sister beat out her brother-in-law even in death. That was so like her.

Her older sister had always so reliable. (-_-)...scratch that, Karin only started being reliable after their parents' death. Before that, she was the devil herself!

With the two of them being nine years apart, Karin was the person Sakura looked up to...and Sakura was the person Karin bossed around and teased.

Sakura didn't need to be reminded how many times her sister had made fun of her childish–even if she was still a child!–ways in front of her friends in elementary school. Especially in front of the cute boys. Sakura narrowed her eyes at nothing in particular. Now she realized why she was so awkward around the opposite sex. It was her sister's fault!

But all that came to a halt when they were told about their parents' death. Karin's personality did a complete one-eighty. It should've been completely foreign to Sakura as a little girl who was always ordered around by her older sister, but it wasn't. It didn't feel out of place at all.

Maybe it was because Sakura knew all along that despite her sister's evil ways, Sakura knew that Karin loved her and cared for her as her baby sister.

So after their parents' death, Karin, who was only seventeen at the time and wasn't of legal age to become Sakura's guardian, solemnly left her baby sister in the care of one of their more trustworthy relatives. Then she thew herself into her studies, graduated high school at the top of her class, got accepted into a top-notch college, graduated early, once again at the top of her class, and found a high-paying job before becoming Sakura's guardian as soon as she turned 20.

The night they were finally reunited, they slept together in each others' arms and just held each other. Sakura remembered balling her eyes own and the gentle hand of her older sister running through her hair, whispering to her and promising that they'll never get separated ever again.

Liar.

Sakura clenched her fists and aloofly watched the ripples caused by the motion spread out until they hit the sides of the tub.

She had promised and yet, today she wasn't here to hear about Sakura's day or to see Mari's smile or to receive Suigetsu's kisses.

What a liar.

Sakura laid down in the tub and submersed herself in the water. She looked up at the bathroom ceiling through the water and saw how unclear it was. She tried to focus on the tiles on the bathroom wall but couldn't.

Was this how her life had for the past three months? Or even for the past eight years?

Her lungs were starting to strain from the lack of oxygen, but Sakura didn't sit back up yet. She needed to think.

Was this her outlook on the world after her parents' death? Unclear and unfocused? Was this why she asked the ridiculous question of whether or not her brother-in-law was going to leave her after the funeral? Was this why she understood Uchiha Sasuke? Was this his outlook, too?

Her chest felt hot and her lungs burned, Sakura struggled to hold her breath a bit longer.

Was she slowly drowning herself from her obscured view of the world?

Was she slowly killing herself?

She yelled out "NO!" into the water and accidentally took in a breath. Sakura quickly sat up and choked on the water that got into her lungs, coughing and breathing heavily as her lungs greedily took in as much oxygen as they could. She gripped the sides of the bathtub to keep herself upright.

KNOCK KNOCK KNOCK

"Sakura-chan! Are you alright?!"

Sakura breathed in too fast and took a bit more water into her lungs, causing her to choke some more before she was able to answer her frantic brother-in-law's call. "Yeah! I'm fine."

"Are you sure?"

"Yeah, I'm okay."

"Okay then." Sakura listened closely to her brother-in-law's footsteps walking away from the bathroom door.

Sakura quickly grabbed a towel and got out of the tub lest she wanted to really drown herself in her lightheaded state. She stood in front of the mirror, dripping water everywhere, and stared into her reflection. She felt a tickling sensation behind her eyes but no tears spilled out.

Her eyes were red but that was from getting water into her eyes.

She still couldn't cry yet, even if her brother-in-law had nudged her closer. It still wasn't her turn yet.

But in all honesty, no one could tell if the water on her face was from the bath or from tears running away from her eyes after being trapped in her tear ducts for the past three months. Or even for the past eight years.

A/N: How was it? Intense? Do you guys feel the tension building?

Well, hopefully you do, 'cause that was what I was trying to do, lol. If you guys didn't feel it then it's fail on my part XD

And as always, sorry but not sorry, this will be the length of the chapters throughout the whole story.

Thank you for the reviews for the last chapter! I hope to hear from you guys again!

Updated – 8/20/2013

EDITED – 9/6/2014 (Oops...took me so long to go back over and fix all the grammatical mistakes...my bad...XD)