CHAPTER 9

Bella POV:

We arrived home from our honeymoon very late at night and I had groggily made my way up the stairs to Edward's room, pulled off my clothes and flopped down onto the bed. I slept for the next ten hours straight. This jet leg was a bitch.

When I finally woke up, I found I was alone in bed . . . with a note on the pillow beside me.

Bella,

Went with Jasper to hunt. Be back later tonight.

Love,

Edward

PS There is coffee waiting in the kitchen.

Coffee . . . he knows me well. I headed into the bathroom and as I undressed to take a shower, I felt a small wave of nausea pass over me. I had suffered through bouts of it on the flights home, but I thought it was just the turbulence. Now I wasn't so sure. I showered, dressed in my own clothes, finally, and slowly descended the stairway in search of my coffee. I found it in the kitchen, along with Esme, who was dressed impeccably, as usual, with a crisp white apron covering her clothes.

"Good morning, sleepy head," she greeted me with a smile and a hug. "I take it you enjoyed the island?"

"Yes, it was gorgeous! I loved it there," I told her as I poured some coffee into a cup. I took a sip and added, "Thank you so much for letting Edward and I use the house."

"You're very welcome. Anytime." She then stepped over to the oven and took out a tray of the most heavenly smelling cinnamon rolls I had ever come across.

"Oh, Esme. You have outdone yourself," I gushed, my mouth already salivating in anticipation.

She smiled at my compliment as she scooped one onto a plate and added a fork before handing it to me. "Be careful, it's still hot. Enjoy."

I sat down at the counter and did just that. I quickly devoured it as I watched her move around the kitchen. She couldn't eat any of the things she cooked for me, but she loved it just the same and was very good at it. Maybe I could do that, too, once I was changed. I hated the thought of giving up cooking. As she cleaned up, she asked about our trip, and I filled her in on all our activities . . . minus one.

Once I was finished, I told her I wanted to drive into town to see my dad. Of course, I was really embarking on a covert mission to get a pregnancy test, as my period had still not shown up, but I did hope to see my dad, too. I was kind of surprised at how much I had really missed him. "Of course, Bella. Take whatever car you like," Esme told me. "This is your home, now. We want you to feel comfortable."

I loved how their extreme way of living was nothing to them. They had thousands of dollars worth of machinery in their garage and to the Cullens, it was just normal. I guess there had to be some upside to living as bloodsucking immortals for all of eternity. Since my black tank was still parked at my dad's, I looked forward to driving something a little smaller and sleeker.

I ran upstairs to brush my teeth and grab my purse when all of a sudden, another wave of nausea hit me, this one a lot stronger, and I had to run into the bathroom. What a waste of a heavenly cinnamon roll, I thought as I finally stopped heaving and flushed the toilet. With my stomach now empty, I brushed my teeth and then went to sit on the bed for a moment. Now I was more suspicious than ever. I needed to get to town for a pregnancy test.

I picked up my purse and headed downstairs to take a set of keys from the rack near the garage door. As I entered the garage, I pushed the unlock button on the fob to see which car I would be driving then laughed. Just my luck, I grabbed the keys to the big, black SUV that Esme usually drove. Oh well. That would make Edward happy.

I drove to town, trying to stay calm, considering the errand I was really running. I just prayed I didn't run into anyone I knew at the drug store. Although, getting married at 18, right after graduation, I knew most of the town probably thought I was pregnant anyway.

I parked the car and ran into the drug store, grabbed not one, but two different tests, paid cash for them then ran back out to duck into the car before anyone saw me. I drove home, uh, I mean to my dad's house, and used my key to go inside. It was so strange to think I didn't live here anymore. It still felt like home to me. The Cullen house was gorgeous, but it didn't seem homey to me yet. I was sure I would get used to it in time.

I ran up the stairs directly into the bathroom and shut the door. I felt like a slutty teenager as I ripped open the box and quickly scanned the directions. I peed on the first stick then set it on the counter, and then I peed on the next stick and set it on the counter beside the first. I pulled my pants up, flushed the toilet, put the lid down and then sat on it to stare at the sticks.

As I sat there, I wasn't sure what I wanted them to tell me. I thought I really wanted it to be negative. Then I could move on with my original plan to have Edward change me and I could live out all eternity with the man I loved.

But, I found that a small part of me kind of hoped it was positive. I had never thought much about having a child until now. The last few days, I was really thinking about what I would be giving up by never having a baby . . . feeling a new life moving inside me, then raising and nurturing a child. And there was a little voice in the back of my mind that kept reminding me it was Jacob's baby. It was like a way for me to selfishly keep a part of Jake with me always. It had been a month since I had seen him and I suddenly realized how much I really missed him.

I dropped my head into my hands and tried to shove that thought from my mind. Ten minutes suddenly seemed like such a long time. Finally, I looked up at the clock to see it had been eleven minutes. I closed my eyes, took a deep breath and stood up to look at the sticks.

A plus sign and a YES. Both of them were positive. I was pregnant. Oh my God, I'm pregnant. I leaned against the wall and slid down to the floor. Just my luck to get pregnant the very first time I have sex. My hand instinctively moved to my stomach as I thought, Now what?

I have no idea how long I sat there on the bathroom floor until the house phone rang and I practically jumped out of my skin. I stood up and shoved all of the evidence of the tests back into the bag to take out and bury deep into the trash can. I was glad that trash pick-up was tomorrow morning.

As I opened the bathroom door, I heard the answering machine pick-up the phone call and was stunned as Jacob's voice came through loud and clear, "Um, hey Charlie, it's Jake." Then there was a long pause, like he was trying to decide whether to leave a message or not. "I, uh, I just wondered if you've heard from Bella. Um, I guess I'll talk to you later." Then he hung up.

I stopped at the bottom of the stairs to sink down onto the bottom step. It amazed me that he would pick this exact moment to call. Should I tell him? Maybe I should talk to Carlisle first . . . I dropped my head into my hands again and wondered how the hell I ended up in this mess. It was just too hard loving both of them. And I did. I knew I did. I loved them both, but so differently. If I could just roll them together to make one guy, I'd be great. Yeah, that's not selfish at all.

I pushed myself off of the step to take the bag I was now clutching to my chest out to bury deep into the trash can then I walked back inside. I glanced at the clock and noticed it was almost noon. Maybe I could convince Dad to have lunch with me. I just hoped I could stay clam enough to talk to him. Then I would call Carlisle. I not only needed his medical expertise, I needed his advice. I just hoped he would understand.

"Bells! Look at you . . . you look great!" Charlie gushed as he hugged me outside the diner. "I think you even have a bit of a tan. How'd that happen?"

"You know there are places in this world where the sun actually shines more than once or twice a month," I teased.

He chuckled as he held the door open for me to walk past him into the diner. We sat down at his usual table and the waitress walked right over to pour him a cup of coffee. "Want some, hon?"

"No," I answered with a shake of my head. "Just water for me, thanks."

Dad order a cheeseburger deluxe with fries, while I went for a bowl of chicken noodle soup, as my stomach was still a little shaky. He politely asked about my trip and I told him all about the island and snorkeling, which he got a big kick out of. "I can't believe my little girl went snorkeling."

"It was scary, and I hate to admit, I didn't really like it all that much, but Edward enjoys it, so I went to be with him."

"Like a good little wife, huh?" I gave him a look and he laughed. "Yeah, that won't last long. At least it didn't with your mother."

Luckily, our food came and I got out of that conversation. As we ate, he talked a little about what had been going on here in Forks, and of course, I didn't miss much. He told me about fishing with Billy and how poorly the Mariners were doing again this year. Then he surprised me by saying, "Haven't seen Jake much. He's been spending most of his time in the garage working on some dirt bike he plans to sell."

A knife through the heart, Dad. Thanks. "Oh yeah? That's cool," I commented, trying to keep my voice as even as possible.

"Billy tells me he's a pretty good mechanic. He did a good job with your truck. I've been letting him borrow it by the way . . . I hope you don't mind."

"No, of course not."

"He, uh, he's pretty down right now. I feel bad for the kid."

"Dad, don't go there OK?"

"I'm sorry, Bells. I'm not telling you that to make you feel bad, I just . . . well, he was such a good friend to you when you needed one, and, I don't know . . . isn't there some way for you to still be friends?"

Friends . . . yeah, well, if we share a child, I guess we should at least be friends.

I took a sip of water and wondered how to get away from this topic when thankfully he glanced at his watch and said, "Oh, hey, I better get back to work. Thanks for coming by. I . . . well, I missed you, kiddo."

I smiled at him and hugged him as we stood up from the table. "I missed you, too, Dad." When he let go, I stepped back and told him, "I was thinking that I would like to set aside one night of the week to come over and cook for you and have dinner, just the two of us before I go off to college. Would that be alright with you?"

His eyes softened as a smile spread over his lips. "Yeah, I think that would be great."

"OK, what night works best for you?"

"Um, how about Wednesday? Middle of the week."

"Sounds good. Wednesdays, it is. Dinner is at six. Don't be late," I warned with a mock angry look.

He chuckled as he put his arm around my shoulder to give me a squeeze. "I wouldn't dream of it."

After he left to walk back to work, I pulled my cell phone out of my purse and called Carlisle. I asked if he was available to see me about a private matter, and he told me he would meet me in his office in 15 minutes. I closed the phone and sighed deeply. Oh Carlisle, I hope you're ready for this one.

I took a deep breath then knocked on the office door and waited nervously until I heard, "Come in." I opened it and stuck my head inside. "Hey."

"Hello, Bella! It's so good to see you. Look at all the color in your face. Looks like Island Esme agreed with you." He had come around his desk to envelope me in a hug.

"Yes, it did. It was wonderful. Thank you so much for letting us use it for our honeymoon."

He closed the door and pointed toward a chair as an invitation to sit down. I noticed as I looked around that his office was well manicured, just like Carlisle. He displayed his latest medical licenses and a few watercolors of Esme's on the walls, and there were several beautifully framed photographs of the family sitting on his massive wooden antique desk. "So, what is this visit all about? Is something wrong?"

I chewed on my lip for a couple of seconds then blurted out, "I'm pregnant."

I noticed his quick look of confusion and shock, but being Carlisle, he made the fast switch to medical mode. "Are you sure?"

"I took two tests this morning and both came out positive."

"When was your last menstrual cycle?" he asked as he automatically reached over for a large pad of paper and began jotting notes.

"Two weeks before the wedding, which means I should have had a period two weeks after the wedding. I'm now almost three weeks late." He nodded and jotted a few things down on a pad of paper.

Then he shocked me by saying, "I'm so sorry, I should have warned Edward. I have heard of this happening, but it's very rare. In all my years as a vampire, I have only heard of a handful of cases . . ." What? Edward? This baby could be . . . Edward's? Oh my God. I was stunned! I had no idea that this was even possible! As I had my small panic attack, I realized that Carlisle was still talking, so I tried hard to focus.

" . . . there are stories about a vampire in South America who has used several women to try and create a family for himself. I've never met him, but I talked to someone once who swears they met him and his family." Then I noticed he was quiet. Too quiet.

"What are you not telling me?" I asked anxiously.

"Well, the women . . . usually they don't survive the birth."

I closed my eyes and my hands moved over my stomach to protect it. "Why?"

"Bella, it's unnatural for a vampire to mate with a human. A baby that is half human and half vampire, well, both halves don't always combine correctly. It can create a very strong creature that eventually ends up tearing the mother apart."

"Oh my God," I whispered. No, I couldn't believe that this baby was some monster that would kill me. Nope . . . not happening.

Again he picked up his pen as he asked, "Bella, have you had any symptoms yet besides the missed period? Morning sickness? Weight gain?"

"I actually had some nausea on the plane ride home, and this morning, I threw up one of Esme's delicious cinnamon rolls. Such a waste." I gave him a small smile, but it went unnoticed as he jotted again on his notepad.

"Hmm. These babies usually progress very quickly from what I've read. I should do some more research," he said as he scribbled on the pad.

Tell him, Bella. Just tell him. "Um, there may be a chance that . . . this baby . . . isn't . . ." Just spit it out! "Um, isn't Edward's."

Carlisle closed his eyes for just a moment then asked quietly, "Jacob?"

I nodded and tried hard to sniff the tears back. I didn't deserve to cry and be comforted. I wronged Edward and I deserved to be screamed at, to be called names. Of course, Carlisle, being who he is, did neither of those. He simply asked, "When?"

"Two nights before the wedding," I answered softly.

He nodded. "I take it Edward doesn't know?"

I shook my head and wiped my tears. "No. I never wanted him to know. I feel so horrible that it happened at all." Well, that wasn't entirely the truth, but I did feel badly about it. "It wasn't planned . . . it just . . . happened."

Carlisle quickly switched back to medical mode. "I would like to run some tests, if that's OK with you. I hate to say it, Bella, but for your sake, and the sake of the baby, I hope this is not Edward's child. I don't think any of us could go through that, especially him."

I nodded. "OK. Let's do the tests."

He smiled his reassuring smile and said, "I'll go make some arrangements. I'll be right back." I nodded as he quickly got up and left the room.

I sat there, alone and let the tears come. I had no idea what to hope for. If this is Jacob's baby, he or she and I would come through safely, but Edward would hate me for my betrayal. If this was Edward's baby, it might be a monster who could kill me. Either way, it wasn't looking too good at the moment.

I shoved the tears away and wiped my eyes just as Carlisle returned to tell me he wanted some blood work first then in a couple of days he would do an ultrasound. "Why don't you follow me to the lab and we'll take your blood now, alright?"

I followed him down the hall to the lab, where he graciously turned me over to one of the lab techs who would take the sample. He left me there with a pat on the shoulder and a smile then told me he would see me at home. I was so amazed by his kindness. I just admitted to him that I betrayed Edward, and yet, he still treated me like a daughter.

After I finished in the lab, I walked slowly down the hall and out to the car. I climbed in behind the wheel and wondered how I would get through the next few days. Would Edward see this in Carlisle's mind? Probably not. Carlisle was very good at hiding things . . . he had centuries to practice. I knew it drove Edward crazy. So, my secret was safe for now, but not for long. I knew this was one secret that would have to come out, and it would be very painful for all of us when it did.