Disclaimer: owns Twilight and all the characters… I'm just borrowing them for a bit of fun.

A/N: Thanks again everyone for the reviews and for putting this story on alert. I didn't realize how much it would mean to me, knowing that people are reading and like the story. I hope I don't disappoint too much! This chapter was tough to write and hopefully its easier to read. Please remember to review- I really want to know what you think about the story, and if there are things that you don't like etc..

Also, I have a lot of things in store for these guys in future chapters, so if things seem to be moving too slowly it's because I am trying to build some back story into it.

Reminder that this story is rated M for content.

Chapter 10

I could hear the shuffling of his boots across the floor as he made his way over to me. I held my breath and tried to remain still. I heard the clank of the buckle as he released the catch and then pulled it from around his waist. No, please no! Not again. I am good, I didn't move, I didn't cry out! I could feel the hot tears falling across my face and soaking my pillow. I tried to hold them back, but I had no control. A muffled whimper escaped my lips as I heard the whoosh of the belt then felt the buckle connect with my bare back over and over again. I tried to stay alert, tried not to let the darkness take me as the pain coursed through my body.

"You are an evil little bastard! An abomination to this world! You should not be alive. You can't be allowed to spread your evil to the world. You must be punished."

His hand grabbed me, causing my body to react in ways that I didn't understand. He coerced these reactions from my body and seemed to get pleasure from my pain.

"You look like an angel, so beautiful…" He then forced himself into me and it felt like he was ripping me apart. Crying didn't help. Screaming just made him hurt me more. I tried to just lay still and not make any noise. When he was finished he would lay on top of me, crushing me so I couldn't breathe. He would sometimes start sobbing, incoherent words falling from his mouth as he tried to regain his composure. Other times he would just leave afterwards or he would get angrier and beat me with more force than before. I never knew what to expect. I would have prayed for death, but I was afraid that he would do this to Alice, and I couldn't let that happen.

"Look what you've done! Evil! Abomination… Must Die… Must sacrifice and be reborn…" His eyes were glassed over and dead looking. He was yelling incoherently, and pacing the room. Something had changed in him and I knew he was going to kill me this time. He removed the restraints and pulled me to the floor. His fists were everywhere, my stomach, my face, until I finally collapsed. His hands were around my throat, and I couldn't breathe. My hands were reaching out for anything that might help me, and came in contact with a lead door stop. I focused all my strength and energy into that one action and slammed it into his head as hard as I could. I was able to connect a second blow to his head before he grabbed it from me. He staggered around the room, and then fell. I don't remember putting on clothes, or leaving the house. I remember seeing Alice and knowing that we were safe for now.

I felt her hands running through my hair, before I heard her soft voice whispering to me.

"Shhh, it's ok. You're gonna be ok. I'm here. You're safe." My whole body stiffened before realizing that it was Bella, we were in the cottage, and I had been dreaming.

She moved her self even closer to me and softly kissed my eyelids, and wiped away tears that were on my cheeks.

"I'm sorry." I barely managed to whisper. My throat was hurting, and even though I knew it was impossible I could still feel his fingers digging into it.

"Are you ok?"

I couldn't answer. I was still trying to pull myself out of the dream. I focused on her hand, tender and gentle, tracing the scars on my back. I knew I was sobbing, but couldn't stop my body from shaking. Bella just pulled me closer, and I clung onto her like she was my only lifeline.

BPOV:

I woke to Edward screaming in pain. He was still asleep. I wasn't sure what to do, so I just held him close and whispered to him that he was going to be ok, he was safe now. When he finally woke up he could barely speak, so I just held him tighter and let him cry until his body finally started to calm. I don't know how long we lay there like that, but the sun was starting to peek through the windows.

He tried to pull away from me. "I'm sorry Bella. You shouldn't have to deal with that."

"No, Edward. You shouldn't have to deal with that. You aren't alone now." I held his face and tried to make him look at me so he could see that I was sincere.

He just sighed heavily and closed his eyes again.

"Do you want to talk about it?"

I could tell he was struggling with whether or not to tell me. "You don't have to, but it might help to get it out."

He took a deep breath and looked in my eyes for a long time. He looked so vulnerable and afraid. I could tell that he was trying to decide if I would be disgusted by him and not want to be around him anymore. So I tried to reassure him.

"You don't have to tell me, but nothing you could say is going to push me away. I am here for you Edward. I will always be here when you need me. Let me help."

We lay there, naked and vulnerable, just holding each other. Edward finally relaxed slightly in my arms and buried his face deeper into my shoulder. He finally started to tell me about the dream, but explained that it was a memory of his father trying to kill him. I did the only thing I could do, listen and hold him tight. It felt like if I let go he would crumble into a million pieces.

"I'm sorry to dump all of this on you Bella. You shouldn't have to deal with my crazy bullshit. You deserve so much more than this."

"Stop. You are not 'dumping' anything on me, and nobody should have to go through what you did. You are such an amazing, caring, loving person. I fully intend on making you realize that." I kissed his forehead and pulled back so he could see that I was serious.

He smiled a half smile, but I could tell that part of him was at least relieved. My stomach started growling, breaking us out of our little bubble. "Sounds like someone is hungry." He chuckled as my stomach rumbled again.

"Yeah, well, we burned off a lot of energy last night, what do you expect?" I said raising an eyebrow at him.

He cupped my face with his hands, his eyes burning with an intensity I had never seen before. He leaned in and kissed me with so much tenderness it overwhelmed me. When he pulled back his eyes were closed and he said "Thank you for being here."

I couldn't form words, so I just nodded and blushed. He smiled at me then, and I knew that the demons from his nightmare were gone for now.

We finally got up and got dressed. We found some granola bars and had those for our breakfast. We didn't really talk much as we went about gathering things up. The snow was already starting to melt and it looked like we could probably leave later this afternoon. Every so often, Edward would walk up to me and just kiss me for no apparent reason. It almost felt like he was trying to prove to himself that I was real.

"I'm not sure I am ready to go back to reality." I finally said.

"Yeah, it's going to be weird going back." His face took on a serious look and he pulled me to his chest kissing the top of my head. "You know, we don't have to go through with the whole arrangement thing. It was a stupid idea, we were drunk, it's ok if you want to go back to the way things were."

I could feel myself tensing up at his words. A million things racing through my head. I was sure now that he didn't really want me as a girlfriend. I realized that I was too far gone to go back to how things were. It was stupid for me to think that this was anything besides a night of shared emotions. I couldn't keep my hands off of him now, how would I be able to handle it if he didn't want to be near me once we got home?

"Um, I am still fine with it if you are. Unless you would rather have Tanya and Lauren trying to rip your clothes off of you in public some more?" I tried to tease, but inside I was torn. It felt like we had progressed to something more, and now he wanted to go back to how things were. I swallowed the lump in my throat and resolved that I would just be there for him, and see what happened from there.

"Bella, you are too perfect. I don't deserve you in my life." He cut off my protest by kissing me again.

******

The snow had melted almost as fast as it had fallen. We managed to get back to his house around 3 that afternoon. We were both self conscious and acting weird around each other. The ease that we shared at the cottage was replaced with anxiety.

I could tell when he walked by that he wanted to reach out and touch me, but he always pulled his hand back. I asked Alice if I could shower before getting ready to go home, so she led me upstairs to the bathroom and showed me where the towels were.

The shower relaxed me somewhat. My gash was starting to heal, but very tender. A huge bruise covered most of my upper thigh. That was going to be hard to hide in gym.

I finished my shower and darted back to Alice's room to dress. Edward was waiting for me when I re-emerged. His hands wrapped around my waist pulling me hard against him. His lips crashed into mine with an urgency I hadn't felt before. It wasn't long before he had me pushed up against the wall and we were both panting heavily.

"Wow, that was… unexpected." I said trying to catch my breath.

"It's been driving me crazy not being able to touch you. I guess I just needed to make sure you were real".

"So? Am I real?" I teased.

"I can't tell yet. My dreams can be pretty realistic." He gave me that wicked half grin and pulled me in for another kiss. "Definitely better than a dream." He finally said.

"That's good to know. I would hate being outdone by a dream of myself doing a better job!"

Alice seemed to appear out of nowhere making both of us jump as she cleared her throat.

"Ah-hem." I blushed and Edward just glared at her.

"What do you want Alice?"

"I wanted to talk to Bella if you are done sticking your tongue down her throat!" With that said she grabbed my arm and pulled me into her room, leaving Edward standing there with his mouth hanging open. I couldn't help but giggle at the expression on his face.

As soon as she had the door closed, she pulled me into a death grip of a hug. For a little pixie, she had some power! "Alice… can't….breathe" I gasped.

"Oh, Sorry!" She said releasing me. "I just wanted to thank you for being there for Edward. I don't think I have ever seen him so happy before. You are good for each other."

"You don't have to thank me Alice. I was glad to be able to help, and he is a really great guy."

"So… do you want to tell me what happened that made him all smiles?"

"Do you really want me to tell you about what your brother and I did?" I said blushing again.

"No, you are probably right. Not something I really want details on. I am just so happy for you."

"Yeah. Well, I probably should be getting home. I am sure Charlie is wondering where I am and what I am doing." I would have liked to have talked to Alice a bit longer, but I knew there were things I had to deal with. Charlie being the main one. I wasn't sure if I could handle seeing Edward again. I knew if I did, then I wouldn't be able to leave. Instead I would end up dragging him into the bedroom and trying to prove to him that real Bella is far better at everything than dream Bella!

"Tell Edward I said bye. Ok?" I gave Alice a quick hug grabbed my stuff and headed for the door.

I was thankful that I made it out before Edward noticed. I just needed some time to think about everything, and being near him made that impossible. I knew I would have to spend time with Charlie before I could escape to my room, so I decided to cook supper. He could grill me while we ate.

Thankfully, Charlie didn't really have much to talk about. He asked the general questions, 'Did I have fun', 'What'd you do'. I tried to keep my answers as truthful as possible. I just let him assume that all of my responses were about things Alice and I did, rather than telling him about Edward. Charlie knew I was no angel, but I was still his little girl and he just wouldn't react well knowing that I spent the night in a cottage alone with a boy.

He seemed pleased that I was making friends. He liked the Cullen's. Commented on how well respected they were. After dinner, he went to watch a game, and I went upstairs to homework and thinking.

I wasn't able to concentrate on the homework, so I started unpacking my bag from earlier and getting my laundry gathered to wash. My cell phone alerted me to a new text message, and I saw it was from Edward. My hands started shaking with nerves as I opened the new message.

B-

Are u ok?

E

Before I could respond I got another message, only this one was from Alice.

Bella-

Edwards really upset u left w/o saying bye. You should call him!

Alice

Great! I didn't mean to upset him. I paced around in my bedroom trying to figure out what to do. My thoughts even more confused than before. Just call him Bella, I told myself, and then hit send before I could chicken out again.

"Bella? Is everything ok?" His voice sounded shaky and almost frantic.

"Yeah, everything's fine."

"You didn't say goodbye. You just left."

"Sorry, I just wasn't sure… I mean I didn't know…" I was too embarrassed to finish my thought.

"Didn't know what Bella? Did I do something wrong? You have to tell me, I'm going crazy here."

"No, you didn't do anything wrong. In fact you do everything right. Too much so. I wasn't sure I could leave if you kissed me again." My voice trailed off in a whisper.

"What do you mean?"

"I mean, that if Alice hadn't interrupted us I would have been dragging you into your room and proving that real Bella is far better than dream Bella". The words flew out of my mouth before I even realized I was saying them.

Silence. Then a slight chuckle.

"I was about to drag you in there myself. I guess maybe that should be added to the list of off limits kissing huh?"

"Yeah, I guess so. I didn't mean to worry you."

"It's ok. As long as we are ok."

We talked for a little while longer before both of us realized that we still had a lot of homework to do. We made plans to meet up in the parking lot before school and said goodnight.

I decided to text Alice back, figuring if I didn't then she would be pissed at me. So I sent her a quick text letting her know that we talked, and that I'd see her tomorrow.

I was just getting ready to start in on my homework again when Charlie knocked on my door.

"Bella, I almost forgot to tell you, your Mom called before you got home. She wanted you to call her. She's worried you are still mad at her for sending you here. You should probably give her a call okay?"

"Sure Dad. I'll call her before I go to bed."

"You know, I am really proud of you kiddo. I know you didn't want to come live with me, but I really like having you here." Charlie was generally a man of few words. So when he did say something, it was usually something he had thought about and really meant.

"Thanks Dad. You're not so bad yourself." I said trying to lighten things up. "It's nice being here."

"Alright, well, I will let you get back to your homework then. I think I am going to go ahead and turn in."

"Goodnight."

Living with Charlie really wasn't so bad. He was much more relaxed than I thought he would be. I think he was even beginning to trust me again. Not that he should. It wasn't like I had been the best daughter. I decided I needed to make more of an effort to be the daughter that he expected.

Better get it over with, I thought, then picked up the phone to call Renee.

"Bella? I am so glad you called sweetie."

"Hi Mom."

"Are you still mad at me?"

"Not completely. Forks isn't really that bad, for a small town."

"Charlie said you have made some friends already. Do you like school ok?"

"Yeah well, you know, its school, lots of homework. I still have a lot to finish up before tomorrow." I was trying to talk, but I was still pretty hurt by the fact that she just shipped me here instead dealing with my problems. Typical Renee, though. She wasn't use to taking care of other people, because she was always the irresponsible one. I didn't want her to know how hurt I was, so I tried to end the conversation. "I probably should get back to my homework."

"Ok Bella. Oh, I almost forgot, a really nice young man stopped by the other day looking for you. He was really cute too."

"Who?" I couldn't think of anyone that would be trying to find me. The people I partied with weren't exactly the type to just stop by and say 'Hi'.

"He said his name was James. I can't remember his last name, I'm not even sure if he told me. He was just so nice, and extremely good looking. How come you never talked about him before Bella?"

I was still in shock over her telling me James had been looking for me. "There was nothing to talk about really. What did he want?"

"He asked about you, said that he hadn't seen you around in a while, and was wondering if he could get your address and phone number. He said he might write you a letter. I probably should have given him your email address, but I honestly didn't even think about it at the time. You know how scatterbrained I get!"

"Mom, I really should get back to my home work." I was starting to shake now that I knew James had been trying to find me, and Renee just practically handed me over to him.

"Okay honey. Phil said to tell you hi. I guess I will talk to you in a few more days. Love you."

"Love you too, bye." My mind just couldn't process all of this. My entire body was shaking and I was starting to hyperventilate. I needed to calm down before I had a full blown panic attack.

I wanted to call Edward and just hear his voice, but I knew that was a mistake. I wouldn't be able to even talk right now, and that would freak him out. I just tried to think about Edward. I let my mind focus on his face, those deep green eyes, and that crooked grin. I could feel my body starting to relax. I was still curled up in a fetal position clutching my arms around me tightly, but I could feel my breathing starting to calm. I finally drifted off to sleep and dreamed of Edward holding me close and feeling safe.

The dream shifted into something sinister. James was always hovering in the background, hiding in the shadows of my dream.

********

When I pulled into the parking lot at school I saw Edward right away. He was running his hands through his hair, but his face immediately softened into a smile as soon as he saw me. Even from this distance, just seeing him, helped calm all of my anxiety from the previous night.

"Hey" He said as he wrapped his arms around me.

"Hey yourself" I said as I buried my face in his chest and deeply breathed in his intoxicating scent.

He pulled away slightly and lifted my chin so he could kiss me. It was a tender, gentle kiss.

I sighed and relaxed even more.

"You okay?" His brow furrowed into a deep crease as he looked at me more closely. "You look worried."

"I'm fine" now "I just didn't sleep well." I tried to shrug off my anxiety as lack of sleep, but I couldn't completely hide my jumpiness. A car door slammed near us, and I jumped in his arms.

"I think it's something more than lack of sleep. You seem very anxious, like you are expecting something bad to happen."

"No, really, it's nothing." I was a horrible liar, and hated not telling him, but I just wanted to forget about James and not let him ruin my life any further.

Thankfully, Edward let it drop as he led me into the school and to my first class. "I'll see you at lunch." He said as he brushed his lips against mine before heading to his class.

We had classes on opposite sides of the school, so I knew I wouldn't see him again until lunch. I easily got lost in the distraction of school and tried to stay focused on what the teachers were lecturing about. By the time lunch came around, I told myself I was going to focus completely on Edward and not let my past keep us from enjoying being with each other.

Alice caught up to me after gym and wanted to know what I was moping about. I guess I wasn't doing as good of a job as I thought at hiding my emotions.

"Did my brother do something stupid again? If he did, just tell me and I will set him straight. He can be such an idiot at times."

"No, Alice. Edward didn't do anything at all. I just…" I knew I would have to tell her something, so opted for partial truth. "I just talked to my mom last night, and it got me upset. It's nothing really. I'll get over it. I just need some time to sort things out."

"Oh, okay. Well, you know I am here if you need to talk, right?" She turned and gave me a hug. "I'll tell Edward to quit worrying. He is completely convinced that he did, or didn't do something, and that's why you are so down."

"Thanks." I knew I wouldn't be able to talk to Edward about this, not yet anyway.

We met up with everyone in the parking lot. Rose and Emmett were all over each other, as usual. Alice ran up to Jasper and jumped into his arms giggling. Edward just stood there watching me.

"So, do you want to go do something?" He asked shyly.

"I really need to just get home. Charlie is just starting to trust me again, and I don't want to screw that up."

"Oh." He looked so dejected. So I walked over and threw my arms around him, hugging him fiercely.

"Would you call me later though? I don't think I could go the rest of the day without at least talking to you." I could see his face brighten and the scowl slowly turned into a smile.

"Anything for you Bella. I missed waking up with you in my arms." He whispered in my ear. His breath and closeness causing chills to run down my spine.

"Me too." We kissed again, keeping it well within our 'allowable' kissing range and then parted ways.

Things were pretty uneventful. I had almost completely forgotten about James knowing how to find me. It had been weeks since Renee told me, so I was finally starting to relax. Most of the other students seemed to accept mine and Edward's new relationship, with the exception of a few. Tanya wasn't willing to give up on him so easily, she hadn't tried anything yet, but I knew it was only a matter of time.

I seemed to just fit with the rest of the gang. We all got along great, and always hung out together. The only down side, was that Edward and I didn't seem to get much time alone. Not that we didn't try, but we always seemed to get interrupted before things got too far along. I was actually kind of glad in a way. It made taking things slow a lot easier. The cottage seemed so far away, like another world completely sometimes. The emotions we shared there were so intense and overwhelming. This slower pace gave us time to really get to know each other. I knew I was falling hard for Edward, even though I didn't want to.