OK so this chapter is a whooping 9,200 words! Now I could have cut it down but it just means that the chapter isnt as dramtic as I intend it to be. Now due to this chapter being so long, I'm going to refrain from posting next week so I have some editing time. I havent had a chance to write much on this story because I've started another story.
Now what I want from my readers is to 1) PLEASE review this chapter, this chapter is really important and i want to get everyone's feedback of the last scene. 2) I have a poll on my profile please vote as it is also important.
Chapter 10 - Tears' Point (of view).
He gripped the steering-wheel of his car, he could make out the blood withdrawing from his knuckles as they began to grow white. Anger filled him almost to the brink of boil; he was practically shaking. The image of Rinoa on top of Seifer made him sick; he knew something wasn't right about the scene. He knew it was funny that of all people, Lauren was the one to lead him to Rinoa. He knew something wasn't right, but even with that feeling, he just couldn't help but get mad at Rinoa.
Selphie ran up to her bathroom looking for Rinoa. She was walking around looking for the girl when she bumped into Squall, who was eager to get out of the front door as quickly as possible. When she asked him about Rinoa he didn't even bother to answer; he just stormed out. Lauren was leaning against the railing to the stairs and had told her of Rinoa's whereabouts and the incident with the soaked top. She handed Selphie Rinoa's shirt and mobile phone and lingered back to her friends.
Reaching the bathroom door she walked in to find Rinoa crying and Seifer with a very sympathetic look on his face, unaware of what he was supposed to do. It was then that she noticed Rinoa's half naked body.
"Er, Rinny are you okay?" Selphie asked concerned.
"Selphie get her a top or something" Seifer asked making his way out of the bathroom and looking around, most probably for Squall.
Selphie looked at Rinoa's soaked shirt but decided against it, taking off her zip-up fleece and handing it to Rinoa instead. Zipping it up she wiped her tears away and took a deep breath. "Where's Squall?" She asked.
"Oh he headed out, what happened?" Selphie asked rubbing Rinoa's arm.
"I'll explain later, I really need to find him." She quickly made out before bursting into more tears and headed out the bathroom door.
"Rinny, your phone." Selphie called out. Rinoa grabbed it, cursing herself for not keeping in with her when she took her shirt off. I could have used it to call him. He told me not to trust anyone.
Running down the stairs she scanned the room, people were looking at her oddly for her abrupt entrance into the foyer. She tried to ignore the stares, but looking to her left she caught Lauren sitting on one of the couches smirking at her. The blonde looked rather happy with herself. I should have known. Rinoa decided she would deal with her another time, what benefit the girl had in making Rinoa's evening a shambles would have to wait, she had more pressing matters.
She ran down the walkway looking around the neighbourhood until she reached the end of the walkway and opened the gate, but still couldn't see any sign of Squall. She took a couple of steps towards the next house and spotted his black Audi still parked in the parking spot. He sat inside holding the wheel, eyes locked into space, face emotionless. It broke her heart to see him like that, he wasn't the world's bubbliest person, but even this new image was on many levels beyond Squall's natural expression.
The door to the passenger's side opened and Rinoa got into the car. She shut the door and turned to look at him. She looked sad, her brows were frowned and the tears were still streaming down.
"Squall, what happened back in the hou-" Rinoa was cut short as her body thrust forward and then pulled back by the sudden movement of the car. Squall reversed out far enough and then hit the brakes changing the gear to first before speeding off into the streets.
Hurriedly, she put her seatbelt on and turned to try to educate him on the event that took place. She found it hard to talk or to stay in her seat due to the constant sharp bends Squall was taking. She looked out past his face to the window beside him and could only make out the silhouettes of trees and houses as he drove by quickly.
"Look Squall, I know you're upset but it wasn't what it looked like." Rinoa tried again her voice trembling. He said nothing, his face didn't change one bit. His eyes were focused on the road and his lips were pressed down showing his concentration.
"Someone spilled drink on me and I just went into the bathroom to change. Seifer happened to walk in and we kind of got locked in-" again her body moved towards the windshield as the car made an abrupt stop.
She looked ahead and noticed they were already parked outside his house. Selphie didn't live that far away but it still took 10 minutes to drive down nonetheless. Squall would have to have done some major speeding to get home this quick. She looked back to him to only notice he was already making his way out and walking towards the house.
She quickly unbuckled herself from her seat and opened the car door. She ran up to him as he raised his hand behind him and turned the alarm on with his controller.
She met him at the front door as he let himself in, she followed close. He took of his shoes and made his way to the stairs walking up completely ignoring her.
She still persisted. "Squall please listen, it was an accident. When you opened the door, I fell on-" For the third time she was cut off. They had already reached the landing when Squall had turned around facing her, his face only inches away from hers. He looked into her brown orbs with his steel blue, his eyes weren't showing the sad loneliness she saw in him when they first met, now they were alight with fire, angry at the turn of events.
"Who you chose to engage in extra curricular activities with is none of my business. I made a promise to your father to get you here in one piece, I did just that." He spoke so coldly. "I hope you had a pleasant evening… now stay out of my way."
He walked into his room and bolted the door shut. She stood there for a second shocked by his words, she never saw this coldness in him. He was abrupt at times, he was reserved, but he was never cold, cynical or rude.
Her eyes filled with tears again and she slumped down by the wall near his door. She hugged her knees and let her head rest on her folded arms. Unable to contain the emotions inside any longer she silently sobbed.
"Can I get you anything else ma'am?" The waitress asked slightly irritated that the teen had only ordered a small coffee and sat sipping on it for the past 40 minutes.
"No thank you, I'll just get the bill." Quistis replied. She took her purse out of her bag taking out the change she owed the woman while the woman wrote up her bill.
The door to the little café opened, a jingle of the bell announcing the arrival of a new customer. Seifer walked in and took a seat opposite Quistis looking up at the waitress.
"Can I get an Americano and a blueberry muffin please." He asked and moved his sight onto the blonde sitting in front of him. The waitress rolled her eyes and went to make the order. Quistis slouched back readily expecting the ear full she was about to receive, she knew she had a lot to apologise for, but she didn't know that her actions would have become this disastrous. In all honesty, although her actions weren't based on sincere intentions, she had hoped that in some way she could replace someone like Seifer for Rinoa; to make up for the promise she made her take. Seifer wasn't a bad guy; he was handsome, he was trustworthy and, when he was bothered, he was actually a very capable and conscientious student.
But that didn't matter now, she had posted something she thought would force the two together, but instead it had led to defaming her cousin and causing a huge embarrassment for her, not to mention cause a rift between them.
"Whatever you have to say make it quick because I feel a migraine coming on" Quistis dully started the interaction between them.
"Funny." Seifer mocked, he couldn't believe her stubbornness, he hadn't even said anything and already she jumped to defence mode. "Why'd you do it?"
Seifer knew Quistis more than anyone else in their group, he had always had a keen eye on her from the moment they met. If Quitis was a book, Seifer was not only the student who studied and wrote a theses on it, rather he was the author. He knew she was planning on something the day a poll was made about himself and Rinoa, her constant remarks of how cute the two were together just heightened his suspicions.
"I was trying to help." Quistis replied not meeting his eyes, she kept her focus on the sugar container in front of her.
"Bull." He knew Quistis, he knew there was more to this, there had to be some underlining maliciousness in her actions. Quistis would never go to such measures to match up her friends, there had to be another reason for her stupidity.
"Its true." She looked right at him, straight into his eyes and stood her ground. "She enjoyed spending time with you, she mentioned you were interested in someone else and I thought you were playing hard to get."
"So what? You thought posting a picture of her in an awkward position on a public forum was going to help? You didn't think that maybe people would have taken it the wrong way?"
"I… I didn't think that far, after the poll results I thought people would be supportive." She tried to prove her point, but she knew she was failing. Seifer was like a hawk, had the boy concentrated a little more in school he could become Balamb's next top lawyer.
"It still doesn't explain why you went to such measures. Don't try and work your way out of this. I saw the efforts you made when getting Irvine and Selphie together, and no offence to you, but lets just say you were more than lacking. Quistis you have a pretty laid back personality, it was you that told Irvine that if she said no, than he'd have to accept it. Why work so hard on Rinoa?"
The waitress arrived with Seifer's coffee and muffin and set it down on the table. She looked at the blonde girl whose eyes were trance like fixated on the sugar container.
"Will the young lady order anything else?" She asked politely. A couple of minutes ago she was irritated by the girl's waste of time and space, but now she couldn't help but feel sorry for her. The young lady was obviously distressed about something and her mood had worsened since the arrival of the blond man.
"Quistis?" Seifer got her attention forcing her to lift her gaze off from the safety of the sugar container and look up at the waitress, glancing at Seifer on her way.
"Could I have a bottled water please." She replied softly.
"Have you eaten anything?" Seifer asked. It was just past 11 o'clock and he figured an early lunch would at least keep her here to discuss the situation that unravelled last night.
Quistis shook her head, she couldn't eat, she kept thinking back to Rinoa's tearful face running across the house and rushing out of the door. She thought something had happened with someone upstairs, maybe someone made some comments about her and decided to further provoke and abuse her. But Rinoa was stronger than that, she still found it odd but couldn't think of anything else that would cause her to run off the way she did. She had asked Lauren what happened thinking it was her doing but the girl refused to acknowledge the incident nor give reason to her leaving. Even Selphie didn't understand why she took off the way she did, leaving Quistis to call her asking if she was alright, but Rinoa wouldn't even answer her phone. She wanted to see her but neither daughter nor father left an address that Quistis could find to apologise.
"Can we have two tuna and sweet-corn sandwiches please." Seifer asked returning to Quistis once the waitress went to carry out the second order. "So?" He continued their conversation. "Why try so hard with Rinoa?"
Quistis hesitated, she didn't want Seifer to think badly of her, she knew it was childish and immature but somehow she thought maybe Seifer might understand and it would lessen the degree of her actions.
"Because I was afraid that Squall might ask her out," She stared at Seifer now, "I've seen the way he looks at her, and I wished he'd look at me like that." She could feel the tears prickling at her eyes, not from a sense of self pity, but because she realised just how shallow her actions were. Now that she thought about it, Rinoa hadn't made any advances towards Squall, her actions were all down to fear in case Squall made the moves. Although regretful of her actions, on a humorous side, it would have made more sense to set Squall up with someone.
"Do you think she likes him back?" He asked Quistis not sure if she knew the truth.
"I thought she did, she's quite open with him and he seems to be okay with that. He's normally closed up, but around her, it's as if he doesn't mind the attention she gives him." She thought about the next sentence she was going to say, she knew she had to word it in a way where she didn't look pathetic, however, she realised there was no way. "I was upset when he said she was his girlfriend so I… made her promise not to go out with him ever."
Seifer sat up straight and inhaled in, Damn you girls and damn you Leonhart, he looked right at her and asked her his next question. "So you made her promise something, and what you thought she'd break her promise?"
"I dunno, I guess. She's always so bubbly. I knew if she didn't do anything Squall would, and then she might say yes." Quistis's hand went to her head and she rubbed at her temples she could feel a headache coming on.
The waitress came with the food and soon disappeared. Seifer sipped at his coffee and set it back down on the round coffee table. He broke off a piece of his muffin nibbling at it.
"Do you know that a month ago, when the six of us when to watch that film, I accused her of liking Squall." He stated, Quistis looked up at this new source of information. "Do you know what she said?" The blonde shook her head. "Wel,l she didn't say he liked him, but she neither denied it. The one thing she did say on the matter, was that YOU liked him. That was a month ago, you seem to be over Squall now and guess what? She still won't admit her feelings, I know she likes him, and sorry to burst your bubble but he likes her too." He took off another piece of his muffin and shoved it into his mouth.
Quistis just sat in silence listening, not knowing what to say. She knew Rinoa was trustworthy and she wouldn't break her promise, she'd have to do some major grovelling to be forgiven.
"Look when I see her I'm going to apologise, I tried calling her last night but she wouldn't pick up. I guess she's still upset over the whole thing." She tried reasoning hoping Seifer would cut her some slack.
He laughed shaking his head. "You are so clueless. Do you even know what happened last night?" She shook her head again her eyes widening in fear of some horrendous news. "She was made a fool of, she was locked in a bathroom with little less than a bra and then I got shoved in with her. To top it off, she was knocked down on top of me, in a very awkward position, when Squall tried to get in. Long story short, he wasn't too happy when he saw us in the position we were in, and took off."
Quistis's mouth was slightly agape in surprise of what she had just heard, she started putting the pieces together and now it all made sense. Rinoa's distraught exit at the party was obviously because she was running after Squall.
"What happened after that?" She croaked.
"Don't know, both of them went home but I don't know if he actually talked to her. One thing I do know is Leonhart. If anything he'll be cold and distant to her, once his trust is taken; he closes up like a oyster with a million gil pearl." He kept staring at Quistis, she was crying now, he wondered if she was crying out of guilt or because she felt sympathy for Rinoa.
"I have to talk to her." She finally managed to speak, she wiped her tears away and blew her nose. She felt horrible, she didn't know it would lead to this kind of degradation but her actions definitely spoke louder than the words posted on the forum.
"You need to give her some time." Seifer took a deep breath, he needed to tell her now, he needed to make sure that she knew the truth and that maybe it might just get her to leave the whole Rinoa and Squall situation alone. "Look Quistis, there's something you should know. The date we all went on, that group thing." She nodded in acknowledgement. "It was a set-up, Squall only went along with it because I told him to. He has never had feeling for you, in fact he's never had feelings for any girl, until Rinoa."
Quistis stared at him with her forehead creased. "But why? Why would you do that to me after the lecture you just gave me?" She asked confused, she wanted to be angry but she was too upset over the situation with Rinoa to get worked up at this new revelation.
"He only asked you out so that you'd spend time with me, but in the end it didn't work out that way, you went off with him and I went off with Rinoa." It was Seifer's turn to stare at the sugar container.
"That still doesn't make any sense, why would he accept my invitation if he was only going to go off with Rinoa, he didn't even know of Rinoa then." It still didn't add up for her and she was more confused than before.
"Sheesh woman you're pretty dumb for a smart lady. Quistis open your eyes and get your head of the clouds." He spoke clearly still trying to keep his voice moderate. "Squall doesn't like you, he only agreed because I made him. Me… so what does that tell you?"
"Um." She creased her forehead trying to think. Because Squall listens to Seifer? "Because Squall listens to you?" She offered.
He slapped his head. "No you airhead, because I like you… and made him agree so I'd go in his place and…" He trailed off agitated.
"Oh." Quistis suddenly felt her cheeks growing red.
Rinoa woke up in her bed groggily looking around and wondering how she got there. She focused her eyes against round clock on the adjacent wall which was displaying the time 11:43. She widened her eyes at the extent of her oversleeping, usually on weekends she would sleep in latest by 10am. She looked down at her clothes; she was still in the clothes she was wearing to Selphie's party minus her own shirt replaced by Selphie's.
The party! She remembered everything. She remembered how Squall stormed into his room leaving her weeping on the landing. She remembered kneeling down against the wall and sobbing. The house was pretty quiet, it was nearing 10pm and her eyes felt sore, she needed to rest them. But defying and trying to keep awake in case Squall came out of his room she remained seated there and waited for him to come out. She could have knocked and made him open the door, but she wanted to talk to him when he had calmed down and knowing he wanted to talk to her. She remembered telling herself she would just rest her eyes but soon she fell into a sleep. She couldn't remember walking into her room after that, though she had some recollection of feeling someone strong pick her up and place her into bed, they had stroked her hair and closed the door quietly leaving her in the dark in a peaceful slumber. Dad. I wonder if he knew why I was out there. Her mind went back to Squall, how disgusted he looked and how cold he was to her after.
She looked at the time again, 11:45, wanting to see him and explain she jumped out of bed and started for his room. She opened the slightly ajar door and peeked inside. The bed was empty, neatly made, his books were scattered on his desk and his window was slightly open. She poked her head back out and ran downstairs hoping she'd find him in the kitchen.
She walked in only to find her father sipping on tea and typing like lightening speed on his laptop. He was in his home clothes which consisted of his checkered black and white shirt, buttoned up to the top excluding the collar and black khaki pants complete with brown slippers.
"Morning Dear, or shall I say afternoon?" He joked smiling without actually looking at her.
"Morning Dad. Erm, Dad where's Squall?" She asked getting straight to the point. She was hoping to see him as quickly as possible before she had to go out with her father.
"Oh, they've gone to Winhill for the day." The General replied looking up. "Said they might be back late and that we should help ourselves to lunch. Laguna is such a well-mannered host, exactly why Galbadia needs someone like him. He even offered to send in a chef all the way from Galbadia to cook for us while they're away."
"So they'll be gone for the whole day?" Rinoa asked hoping by chance her father was wrong and they'd walk into the kitchen any minute. Her father only nodded and she slumped down on a stool feeling like the weights on her shoulders were getting heavier.
"Why don't you get ready poppet and we'll head down the town, you can buy something for Quistis while you're there, as a thank you present for making you feel welcome here." He suggested sipping on his tea again.
Yeah right, thanks Quistis for everything, I feel really welcome. She felt the sadness she was feeling a second ago vanish replaced by irritation and betrayal.
Laguna rolled down the driver's side window and stuck his hand out leaving it to hang. His sunglasses sat on top of his head allowing him to see the road ahead in all it's sunlight. Ellone sat next to him in the passenger seat reading a book with her feet up resting on the dashboard.
Squall sat behind them with his head pressed against the glass window staring out onto the Galbadian plains. His thoughts only consisted of two things; seeing Rinoa on top of Seifer and seeing Rinoa slumped outside his room. The latter was playing on his mind the most, even though seeing Rinoa with Seifer made his stomach knot he couldn't help but feel responsible and affectionate seeing her in her slumber. He had watched her at first looking at the innocence in her face, he couldn't believe that an angelic face as hers was capable of getting down and dirty in a bathroom at a high school party. Something just wasn't right about that scene. He knew it was some kind of set up.
Seifer had called him last night using Irvine's phone, Seifer knew he wouldn't pick up if he had called him himself. He only got one sentence in though, before Squall hung up on him. But that sentence was informative enough, it only took one sentence to make Squall realise that yesterday wasn't what it was made out to look like. If anyone knew Squall well enough other than Ellone it was Seifer, it only took him that one sentence to get Squall to open his mind to the truth.
He replayed Seifer's words in his head over and over. Was it true? Or is it just for my solace? Was that her true feelings? His head was filling with so many questions, so many things he wanted to answers to. He wanted to talk to Rinoa, he wanted to ask her for the truth. But at the same time he felt knowing the truth would cause him more grief. Seeing Rinoa in that position regardless of whether it was sincere or not, showed Squall the attachment he had over her, an attachment he hadn't formed with anyone since his mother's death. He didn't want to be dependant on anyone, physically or emotionally. People either betrayed you, abandoned you or neglected you and he didn't want any of those things to occur to him again.
Of course Raine couldn't help her death, neither was it in her hands the emotion Squall felt after. But he promised himself he wouldn't get close to another person after his mother's death so he wouldn't have to go through it again. Just thinking about losing Ellone and even Laguna one day worried him, he knew the day would come, but he'd try to cope.
He closed his eyes mentally kicking himself. How could I let myself like her, how did I become so attached to her? He didn't want this feeling, he didn't want to be emotionally dependant on another human being again. He had just suffered minor hurt from Rinoa's actions that he didn't want a repetition regardless of the truth.
He knew what he had to do, he had to take control of the situation, he had to take control of his feelings.
The Balamb Hotel was Balamb's busiest and most expensive hotel with its seaside view, excellent restaurant and its top 5 star rating for it's services. It was situated just off the hillside off the town's Intercontinental Rail Station and between the cobbled pathway to the local pier. With its large foundation and friendly exterior it attracted many tourists and acted as the General's decoy as to why he was in town.
Father and daughter sat on the large patio of the hotel's restaurant sampling a range of Balamb's fish. The restaurant's patio was decorated with beautiful red roses and white lilies that made the bleak concrete of the granite slabs look more pleasing. Six large square tables were scattered across the large patio with an equal amount of two seated tables. Each table also was adorned with small gold and white lanterns that would be used during night making the setting more serene.
The two had shopped in the town for a few hours buying souvenirs and presents for family and work colleagues back in Deling City. Rinoa had to pick something out for Quistis as a thank you present initiated by her father but had a hard time finding something that accented her true feelings. She didn't want her father to ask if anything happened between them as her usual uplifting spirit she felt towards the mention of Quistis refused to make its way. Settling for a white gold tennis bracelet she asked the woman behind the counter at the jeweller's to wrap it up. She decided she wouldn't give it to Quistis straight away, she didn't deserve it, but maybe once the anger in her subsided she would hand it over at least for the hospitality she showed her when they weren't at war.
She was still playing with the square black velvet box when their waiter returned with his notepad in hand.
"Have Sir and Madam decided which fish they will be having for lunch?" He asked looking at both father and daughter.
"Yes I think I'll try the Balamb fish, it's a bit foul on the nose but I quite like the texture, a very meaty fish. Yes I'll have that with jersey potatoes, without the butter, parsley sauce and a garden salad please." The General ordered and handed back his menu.
"And the lady?" The waiter asked looking at Rinoa who was still idly poking at the small black box.
"Dear?" Caraway tried to get the girl's attention.
Rinoa looked up and just noticed the waiter in front of her. "Oh sorry, erm… what's in your Ocean Delight?" She asked feeling stupid for not attempting to look at her menu.
"The Ocean Delight is a choice of our freshly caught fish, grilled and served with an Estharian salad and mushroom sauce."
"Ok, can I have that then please." She smiled and handed back the menu.
"And which fish would you like?" The waiter asked.
"Salmon please, and could you make it well done?"
"As you wish ma'am." The waiter obliged and went off.
"So Rinoa, are you going to tell me what's bothering you?" Carway asked crossing his arms and looking at his daughter worriedly.
She knew sooner or later he'd figure something was wrong, back in Deling she'd always confide in her father when something was bothering her, here she kept bottling it up having no one to talk to.
"Its fine Dad, everything's fine." She decided against coming clean, she wasn't exactly sure how he would take the fact that she was naked in a locked bathroom with another boy.
"Things may be fine but they are not good. And I want to know why things aren't good."
"Dad, I'm your princess, not the world's. You said yourself I can't expect the world to hand me everything on a silver platter." She said slightly harsh not wanting to seem rude, but quite irritated that the conversation was still being pursued.
"Yes I did say that, but that doesn't mean people can treat you otherwise. I know there is something wrong, you were quiet the whole time we were shopping and just now you wondered off into a daydream. I also happened to notice every time I mentioned Quistis you avert your eyes." He continued to analyse.
There was no way getting past her father, he wouldn't relent and she knew she'd have to say something before he wanted to discuss things with Quistis's parents.
"We're just going through a phase, like all friends go through." She decided to make the situation lighter than it was.
"And what type of phase are you going through?"
The waiter returned from the kitchen into the foyer of the restaurant. It was only 1:30pm, but he couldn't wait for his shift to be over. The day in day out smell of the Balamb fish was driving him mad, but only a couple of more overtime shifts and he'd have the money he needed for the big question. He couldn't believe people touched that stuff, like the General for instance, yes it was a good textured fish but it smelt so foul it was enough to put you off from being able to consume it. Tourists normally only ordered it as an experience to Balmab dining, they liked the modernity and cultural experiences of Balamb and trying out the world worst smelling fish was all part of the package.
Shaking his head at the naivety of foreigners he went to serve his next customer.
"Yes Sir may I be of assistance?" He asked the large man in front of him. The guy was a typical tourist clad in a floral print shirt and cream khaki cut off pants. The look was complete with a straw hat and black sunglasses and a camera attached to his neck.
"G'day mate, can I get table, I'm just on me lonesome." The man's strong Shumi accent voiced back.
"Of course you may Sir." The waiter replied and picked up a menu. "Follow me please."
They made their way to a small round table at the back of the patio near a wall decorated with roses and vines. The man took a seat and took hold of the menu being passed to him.
"I'll give you a minute to read through the menu." The waiter informed and left the man by himself.
He wanted to call the waiter back to order a drink as he felt very parched. He held out his hand to wave to the waiter but noticed him walking to a table with a very familiar man and a young woman.
"Your food will be with you shortly Sir, can I offer you any more beverages while you wait?" The waiter asked Caraway.
"No thank you, I'm perfectly fine." Carway dismissed the man and Rinoa just shook her head.
Once the waiter disappeared she continued with her story. "So I guess in a way I was breaking my end of the promise, I swear I didn't know I was doing it at the time. I just thought that maybe if I couldn't like Squall, I could at least be friends with him."
Caraway thought for a long time processing everything his daughter had said in the past 15 minutes. He had listened to her version and could honestly tell that she felt something stronger than a high school crush. But is she ready for such a serious bag of emotions?
"Darling, first of all, even though you did make a promise, and I have told you to always carry out your commitments, you shouldn't feel guilty about this one." He started.
Rinoa looked up at her father surprised. "You see, making a promise about liking someone, it sort of has that reverse effect. I am not saying you like Squall because you are not allowed to. But the level of fondness you have on him is made greater when someone deters you from that." Caraway tried to explain.
She wanted him to continue and give her an explanation for her feelings, she hadn't talked to anyone about this and she was glad and appreciative that she had someone to finally confide in.
"Now making someone promise not to like someone, or even love someone," He paused making eye contact causing Rinoa to look away, "isn't fair. We don't always have control over our feelings. You might hate someone one day and wake up the next declaring eternal love. Its silly to make these promises and you shouldn't have agreed, it would have made this situation easier."
"But Dad I did try and stay away." Rinoa tried to plea.
"I know honey, but you see, once you made that promise, whenever you made advances to Squall even if it was a in jest or as a friend, you were making Quistis feel insecure. The promise was more for her benefit than yours. To be honest I would prefer if you didn't like anyone and stayed with me until I'm on my deathbed but I know that isn't going to happen. You need to talk to her Rinoa, you need to tell her that although you made that promise, you regret it and…" Caraway paused.
"and…" Rinoa prodded.
"…that you can't keep to terms with it." He finished.
She was surprised by her father's suggestion. "No Dad, I can, I can do this I've done it this far I know-"
"You don't know." Caraway interrupted. "Rinoa I've seen the way you smile at that boy, I don't think I've ever seen you smile that way towards those pop boy bands you liked. That smile you adorn yourself with is a serious one. I've seen it before and I can tell from your smile you are serious about Squall."
"How?" She asked still not sure.
"Because your mother smiled at me like that."
The waiter placed the two plates on the General's table and made his way to the large man sitting on the small round table.
"Has Sir made a decision?"
"Yeah, could I just have the Balamb fish and some sea salt chips please?" The man asked his gazed still on the couple at the back.
"Right away."
"Er, excuse me, but that man over there, is that who I think it is? Is he the General Calway from Deling City?" The man asked the waiter hoping for confirmation.
"Yes, the General Caraway, I'm guessing the young lady is his daughter." The waiter replied about to make his way back to the kitchen.
"Yeah, the young Sheila looks like the late Julia doesn't she?" The man inquired further. "So why is he here?"
"I am sorry Sir, I would not have that information. Please excuse me." The waiter replied and walked off.
The man took his phone out and dialled in a number. He placed his phone near his ear and waited for it to connect. Three rings and then someone picked up.
"G'day mate, its me Skippie, never guess whose here in Balamb?"
Squall sat legs crossed under him on the large hill covered in grass. His mother's tomb stone sat in front staring out at him as if to ask what was wrong. He felt silly talking to a stone, Ellone and Laguna did it all the time saying it was a way to relinquish grief. Squall just thought it was silly, his mother was dead, she had been for years now, it wouldn't make him feel better to talk to a tomb stone.
His thoughts kept going back to Rinoa and the course of action he needed to take. He wanted to open his mouth and ask his mother, well ask the stone in front of him but he knew it was pointless. He wouldn't get an answer if he was doing the right thing. He had only himself to depend on.
Caraway waited for the waiter to return to him with his credit card. The two had finished their late lunch and were waiting to head off home before Laguna and the others returned.
Rinoa was still thinking about the impending conversation she were to have with Quistis. She didn't know if her father's advice was the right thing, she was trying to image Quistis's reaction but the only thought that came to her was Quistis's tearful eyes accusing her of planning this all along. She remembered back to the day when she first heard about Squall and how she promised to help Quistis, now that she thought about it she felt rather guilty and even more apprehensive about telling her about Squall.
"What's wrong pet? I thought we sorted your problem?" Caraway asked breaking Rinoa's train of thought.
She sighed and looked up at him. "Dad, yesterday something happened at Selphie's party, something Squall didn't like. And I'm pretty sure when I get home he won't be talking to me." She paused.
"What happened?" Caraway asked worried.
"Its not a big deal, but I was thinking, there isn't any point in telling Quistis about my feelings for Squall. After last night I doubt he'd return them."
"Mate, its Skippie again. Yeah I got 'em, I just need to know why he's here… Well I'm not sure about that… Look mate you got your reasons and I got mine. Why don't we make a deal, I'll get you all the information and pictures you want and you find me a way into Esthar?… Hehe, good one mate, see ya then."
Rinoa tipped the content of her handbag onto her bed and picked up her phone. The screen displayed that she had one new message. She slid her phone up and viewed the message.
We both got mail, mine was about the Geog. trip to Shumi Village, I'm guessing so is yours.
You don't need to txt back, thought you should know thats all.
Q.
She rolled her eyes, it seemed that she would have to see Quistis sooner rather than later. She had hoped to steer clear of the blonde during school as she was still confused and upset about this whole situation. Now however, she needed to retrieve the letter from her to get parental approval.
Sighing to herself she hit the reply button and started tapping away.
OK bring in my letter 2mrw
Ill meet you in the library 8.45am
Ill get my dad to sign it so don't ask Anna or Jacques.
R.
The car passed by the Balamb Hotel towards the upper hill estates of Balamb. Laguna was tired of the long drive through the wide Galbadia plains but he enjoyed it nonetheless. He looked in the rear view mirror at Ellone sprawled at the back listening to her iPod. Squall was in deep contemplation in the passenger seat. Laguna really wanted to prod his mind but from past experiences he knew he wouldn't get anything out of the young boy.
"Penny for your thoughts." Laguna joked and awaited the usual rolling of the eyes from Squall. To his surprise Squall turned to him looking directly at him.
"I've been thinking, I want to Study at Esthar Central University."
"Really?" Laguna was surprised he actually got something out of Squall. He was even more surprised Squall was thinking of moving to Esthar, it excited him to think that Squall would move with him, that he'd choose to study in a country that one day he would run, that he would finally start learning about the country his father governed.
"Yeah." Squall replied and went back to staring straight ahead.
"May I ask why?" Laguna played it safe, he didn't want Squall to close up again after finally showing his father some initiative.
"My time in Balamb is up. There is nothing else keeping me here." He said seriously still not looking up.
The excitement Laguna felt only seconds ago was now replaced with apprehension. Squall's decision seemed clouded, it wasn't sincere, it wasn't for passion or to seek knowledge. It seemed like he was running from something.
Not wanting to invade his son's privacy Laguna settled with the answer. He'll tell me when he's ready.
The two families sat around the dinner table, helping themselves to the hot spicy food purchased from the Trabian restaurant Laguna was talking about the day before, making general chatter. The two father's would sometimes go off on a tangent about their youth and how they spent their time at jobs they were not very good at before they found their passion, and talking about the current plans with Esthar and Galbadia.
Currently they were talking about horrendous family vacations laughing at the mishaps and blunders that took place.
"… and there's Rinoa; lipstick smeared all over her lips and chin, foundation powder all over her face and eyeliner vigorously sketched onto her forehead, adorned in her mother's heels, jewels and a very expensive Galbadian Silk scarf." Caraway was saying through laughter along with the rest of the room. "But to top it off, she had gone around the room with the same make-up colouring in all the flowers printed on the silk wall-paper of the hotel room. Well you could imagine the hotel owner's face when he saw the room, I thought he was about to explode."
They all laughed, Rinoa with tears in her eyes from the laughter, she remembered the event vividly although only being four at the time.
"I think our best horrendous vacation has to be in Winhill when Squall…" Ellone said trying to stifle the laughter that was bursting out of her.
Laguna caught on and let out a chuckle himself banging his fist on the table.
"Alright we don't need to talk about that, it was nothing." Squall quickly tried to prevent the story from unfolding.
"Oh I want to know!" Rinoa piped up, she met Squall's eyes hoping that he wasn't still upset from yesterday. When the family had walked in she greeted them as they were plating up the take-way. She had said hi to him and he replied back as if everything was normal.
"Trust me you don't." Squall replied back before putting a mini samosa into his mouth.
"Trust me I do." Rinoa smiled back. She was happy they could go back to being normal again, after the cold shoulder he showed her, she thought she had lost their new found friendship. It made her reconsider the talk she was suppose to have with Quistis.
"Well it all started with a water shortage in the Inn we were staying at." Ellone started. Squall rolled his eyes knowing the outcome of the story. "We all knew about the water shortage and it just so happened, that during the hottest day that summer, the Inn had no access to any water and therefore lost a lot of customers. Our mum used to run a pub in Winhill and she knew the owner and so we stayed out of loyalty. The only person that didn't know about the water shortage was Squall. It just so happened that Squall's luggage was the only one that got misplaced when we got to Winhill, so he had to make do with what he was wearing." Ellone tried to reiterate the story but finding it hard through giggles.
Rinoa kept looking at Squall who was trying to busy himself with the spicy food on his plate.
"To cut the long story short, Squall went in to take a shower leaving his clothes in his room. While in the bathroom trying to figure out why there was no water, the housekeeping lady came in and took his clothes mistaking it for dirty laundry. So Squall comes out while the lady has just popped out to the corridor to put the clothes away. There he is standing completely nude with the door wide open and the manager of the Inn as well as his wife and kids all staring at him in shock."
The group all burst into laughter, minus Squall whose face couldn't get any redder from the embarrassment.
"Oh my God, how old were you?" Rinoa asked.
Squall rolled his eyes, "I was 10." He replied back.
She smiled at him, she liked that she was able to share one experience with him, she wondered if Quistis knew about this. Ridding herself of the thoughts of Quistis she decided to bask in the moment she shared with Squall.
Squall was putting his clothes away neatly folding them and placing them in his draws.
He had just gotten into his sleeping clothes when he heard a light rapping on his door.
"Come in." He called out looking as the door opened.
"Hey" Rinoa squeaked as she made her way through the room and sat on his bed.
He turned around again and folded more clothes putting them away in his draws. He took a deep breath in contemplating whether or not to make a move first.
She beat him to it. "Squall, erm I just wanted to see if we could talk about yesterday." Rinoa started, looking at him hoping he'd turn around.
"There's nothing to talk about." He replied back casually.
"I wanted to explain what happened." Rinoa said still facing his back. She wanted to get up and make him face her. She didn't need to as he turned around that moment.
"You don't need to. I know it was a set up." He replied moving to his desk and shuffling around the items placed on it.
"Oh, so you know there's nothing going on with me and Seifer." She looked at him waiting for him to confirm as he nodded. "Well that's good. I hope we can go back to being the way-"
"Look Rinoa." He faced her now, seriousness written all over his face. "Don't think that the dinner downstairs changed everything. I was being civil because I didn't want your father knowing something had happened last night. Also, you're a guest in my home so I have to treat you with hospitality and kindness. But…" He thought about this carefully, once he said it, it would change everything.
"But?" Rinoa asked getting up from the bed.
"But once you go back to Quistis's house, we can't be friends." He said and went back to tidying his books.
"Wh-" She had to swallow, she was getting worked up. "Why?" She asked her breathing quickening.
"Because, we're not cut out to be friends. We're different." Squall said without looking at her.
"How? I'm no different from Selphie or Quistis, and you said we could be friends." She said making her way towards him. He wasn't staring at her, he was facing the door with her to his right.
She raised her hand and held his arm, feeling the tone and firmness of his hard biceps. She pulled at his arm forcing him to face her.
"You were different downstairs, how can you change so quickly?" She asked after he refused to answer her other question.
"Look, I don't like leaving my dirty laundry out to dry. Call it fake or whatever." He said to her coldly refusing to look at her.
"Still, if you know I didn't do anything with Seifer why don't you want anything to do with me?"
"Look, don't make this long. We're just not friendship material… I find you annoying." He said still with his gaze averted, serious faced, leaning against his desk.
"I'll change, tell me what you find annoying and I'll stop it." She pleaded her eyes prickling with tears.
"Its nothing you can change, its your character." He stayed cold and emotionless.
"Well, we haven't gotten to know each other properly, if we did then maybe-"
"I don't want to get to know you." He interrupted.
She shook her head adamant that it wasn't true, she wouldn't believe it. The tears in her eyes were increasing making it hard for her to see him now, he was just a blur, a gorgeous blur that was slowly being taken away.
She swallowed again, a huge pill like bump formed inside her throat. She steadied her breathing and put her hands on his chest looking up at him as she moved her body closer to his. She could feel his heartbeat against her right hand, it was moving almost as fast as hers. She didn't want to lose him, she wanted to bring back any morsel of friendship they could have, if he wouldn't give her anything more than that.
But she knew friendship wasn't what she was after. Now in his shell-like state detesting to have anything to do with her, she was willing to do anything to keep him, to have him in her life. She realised she couldn't and didn't want Squall to not be a part of her life, she wanted to share her moments with him and she wanted him to share his moments with her. She wanted to feel him embrace her, to stroke her face and hold her in a lock in his strong muscled arms. She wanted him so badly in that moment and she wanted to hold him and never let him go. I love him.
"I heard you talking to Ellone Friday night. I know how you feel about me and I feel the same way." She finally revealed in a little louder than a whisper.
Squall stood stiff with his jaws locked. So she did hear. This made it harder for him, he wished he had never had that conversation. He made eye contact with Rinoa now, she was in the brink of spilling her tears. It was hurting him to see that he was cause of her sadness, but he couldn't let himself get attached to her, she was like poison for him and she would only lead to his destruction. He wouldn't let the tears be a trick for him to fall back into dependency. He just shook his head.
"Squall…" She breathed again steadying her herself, she realised her body was very close to his, her eyes were inches away from his lips. She bit her lip at their closeness and at how close she was of losing him. She couldn't let that happen, she needed him, she wanted him and loved him too much to let it happen.
"Squall…" She repeated, he didn't look at her. "I love you." She swallowed again, her breathing was still coming in short rasps and the tears, the tears were brimming to the top almost like a steel kettle whistling at boiling point.
He looked at her directly in the eyes, she was inches away from him, it killed his heart but he couldn't let it happen. happiness was immediately thrust into him when she spoke the words he wanted to hear. "She likes you just as much as you like her." Came Seifer's voice from the call last night, it was true, this whole time she did love him. But it was too late.
"I don't love you." He lied.
The tears escaped, each one quickly following the other as they made their way down her soft eyelashes falling onto the smooth warmth of her cheeks. From there they all descended down, each streak paving the direction for the others to follow. They slid down her cheek in ease, the left tears racing the right, each racing to make it to her chin where they'd jump off meeting their end.
She backed away from him. She turned. And hastily made her way out of his room and into hers, shutting the door and sliding down to the floor with her head resting on her knees. The tears started again followed by the sobs that escaped her mouth.
Squall turned back to his desk leaning in and fixing his books busily. The polished oak desk was normally clad with books open and unopened, but now he had them all neatly pushed back standing against the wall. The front of the desk was all but clear. Tears stained the desk, they were small tears, only three droplets shedding a private amount of hurt.
Squall sniffed and wiped his cheek with the back of his hand, turned off the lights and got into bed.
I hope this chapter was as upsetting as i intended it to, i remember writing this about 3 weeks ago and thought i had achieved some form of heartbreak on Rinoa's side. The next chapter will see some changes, but dont worry there will be more Squinoa, i wouldn't do that to you guys.
PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE review, and thank you to ALL those people who reviewed last time! Especially GrimReaper1989 and MonMonCandie!