MAKING THE CUT

"We are... monsters. We have neither dreams, nor honor." ~ Genesis Rhapsodos

DAY 9

1:22 AM.

Genesis blinked open his eyes in confusion.

He'd been running down a dark hallway, being pursued by hordes of winged creatures. They'd surrounded him and began engulfing him like a massive tidal wave, shrieking at him, insisting that he was a monster and he was to join their ranks. He tried to escape, but the closer he looked at the creatures, he realized that every single one of them had his face.

And then he blinked, and found himself to be staring at a blank red wall.

Had it been a dream, then?

Sighing, Genesis rolled onto his back only to wince as pain spiked at his side.

"Good to see you've joined the land of the living again."

He glanced over to see Sephiroth standing in the doorway, looking rather... tired. "Are you alright?"

"Shouldn't I be asking you that?" the general said, moving to sit on the edge of the bed.

"Huh?" And then Genesis was flooded by a torrent of memories and emotions. "Oh."

Sephiroth idly drummed his fingers on the bedspread. "Would you like to tell me what happened?"

Rolling onto his good side, Genesis buried his face in his pillow. "I screwed up."

"I'm sure it can't be that bad."

"Oh Sephiroth, you haven't the slightest idea of the magnitude in which I have screwed up," he murmured. "I had a chance to help someone else and I blew it, all because I'm too selfish and rank-conscious. And now he hates me."

Obviously agitated, the general huffed in annoyance. "Who hates you?"

"Cloud Strife."

"Him? Are you sure you're not blowing this out of proportion? After all, he is only a cadet."

With much difficulty, Genesis forced himself into a sitting position. "That cadet," he hissed, "represents the majority of this company's opinion of me. He had no idea who I was this past week, and when I happened to ask if he knew Genesis Rhapsodos, do you know what he said to me?"

Sephiroth shook his head.

"That he wasn't someone he'd want to see as ShinRa's hero." Genesis squeezed his eyes shut and gritted his teeth. "If I can't even wear ShinRa's name, what does that degrade me down to? I'm pure destruction; nothing but a monster who takes orders."

"That's not true."

"It is!" the redhead yelled. "I'm not fit to help anyone, lest I pass my nature on to others. My friend, the fates are cruel... there are no dreams, no honor remains... the arrow has left the bow of the goddess."

A firm hand came to grip his upper arm and Genesis reluctantly looked up to meet the general's sea-green eyes.

"You. Are. Not. A monster," Sephiroth said, emphasizing each word with a pointed shake of his hand. "You are Genesis Rhapsodos, my Second in Command and the only one I would ever want to have. Over the years, you've taught me to be more human than I could've ever hoped to become on my own. How could a monster teach me that?"

The commander sighed. "It's not that simple, Sephiroth... I've done damage that I couldn't possibly ever undo."

"Tell me what happened," he urged.

"I saw too much of myself in Strife and it made me careless. I started telling him things that I really didn't mean to, and it brought us closer than intended. When the time came to finally address the problem, I was too weak to just tell him no and I regretted it." Genesis shifted, pulling his knees to his chest. "After that, he found out who I really was and why I was training him, and I got scared. I thought that if I hurt him first, it would save me from getting hurt, but in reality it did just the opposite. Now I've let you down, I've let Angeal down, but most of all I've let myself down. And I've lost someone who I think could've become a very valuable friend to me."

"And how long were you in that training room?"

"I don't know," he shrugged. "I started at three and ended whenever you found me."

"Genesis! That's seven hours straight," Sephiroth frowned. "You can't go that long without taking a break or Curing yourself. Or even drinking water, for Shiva's sake. What the hell were you thinking?"

"I wasn't, alright?" the redhead snapped, balling up his fist and punching the mattress. "You don't know what he said to me, how I felt. I needed to distract myself."

The general snorted and pinched the bridge of his nose. "That is so like you, Genesis. You lose your temper and act like it's everyone else's fault," he chastised. "Maybe you should stop whining about your problems and try to fix them instead."

Genesis pinned Sephiroth with an icy glare. "How can I possibly fix this?" he demanded. "Dreams of the morrow hath the shattered soul, pride is lost, wings stripped away, the end is-"

"Stop that," Sephiroth interjected, cutting off the last of the verse. "Are you just trying to redeem yourself in the eyes of this cadet so you can win our bet?"

The question made the redhead pause. Was it really still about winning a bet? Not really. From the start, all the bet had been to him was a way to prove himself just as good as...better than Sephiroth and Angeal as a mentor. Of course, he'd obviously lost already.

Except halfway through the journey, his emotions began to get involved.

He stopped seeing Strife as a means to an end and started seeing him as a human being. One who reminded Genesis painfully of himself.

Granted, the redhead had been one of the most talented cadets the company had ever seen while Strife was two steps away from getting dropped from the program, but they both had the same drive, the same dream. Strife was an innocent child who wanted nothing more than to become something, someone... Genesis could remember the nights when he'd lay back in his family's orchard and gaze up at the stars, imagining himself battling ferocious monsters, rescuing civilians and garnering the praise of his admirers.

Had Strife done the same back in Nibelheim?

"He told me he looked up to me..." Genesis whispered hoarsely, surprised that tears were threatening him. "I was... I was his hero, Sephiroth. I-I'm so cruel..."

Sighing, the general shook his head. "You're not cruel, you've only acted that way," he said at length. "It's never too late to change, Genesis."

The redhead blinked. "What do you mean?"

"I mean, if you don't like who you are, then you should make an effort to change instead of just lamenting about it," he replied.

Leaning his head against his knees, Genesis traced abstract patters on the blanket with his finger. "How? I've been like this for so long, I wouldn't even know what I'd want to become."

"Well," Sephiroth said, standing up from the bed and heading out of the room. "You'll just have to think about that, won't you?"

And so he left the commander alone in the dark with nothing but his turbulent thoughts for company.

The implication of 'Don't bother showing up tomorrow' had been in Genesis' words yesterday, and that was one order Cloud was more than willing to follow. After crying himself to sleep last night, the cadet had woken up strangely calm, as though he'd gotten all the swirling emotions out of his system and could now think clearly. It still hurt, knowing he'd only been a pawn in a game between two First Classes, but in a way he felt stronger because of it. And he refused to let anyone take advantage of his weakness like that again.

With an air of new confidence, he strode proudly down the hallway to his combat class. He would no longer play the innocent shadow on the wall who startled at the slightest noise. Cloud Strife was going to pass that exam, and he was going to do it without anyone's help.

For the first time in months, the blond arrived on time. He ignored his fellow peers for the most part as he got ready in the locker room, only sending glares to those who got in his way. It wasn't so much that he was intimidating that made them leave him alone, but the fact that Cloud never glared. Period.

The kid obviously meant business.

As soon as class started, the cadet threw everything he had into training. He forced himself to do more pushups, more sit ups, and jog more laps, pushing his body to its limits. He made sure his aim with the rifle was steady and straight, and shot more bullseyes than he ever thought he was capable of.

Cloud Strife used to be the cadet everyone would laugh at when he screwed up.

But today, there just was something about the determined glint in his eyes, the hardness of his expression and the almost challenging tilt of his chin that confused even Jadak. For once, he was not bothered. He felt like a machine: a powerful locomotive that could not be stopped by any human means.

"Alright, you grunts," Instructor Davis bellowed, meaty hands going to his hips in what looked like a pathetic attempt at a heroic stance, "line up!"

The sweaty, panting cadets scrambled into formation. Cloud felt a sharp jab in his side and glanced over to see that he'd ended up beside Yuza. The taller blond gave him a questioning glance, obviously having noticed the change in his behavior as well. Instead of shrinking away like he normally would, Cloud matched his gaze until Yuza chuckled in that eerie way of his and turned his attention back to Instructor Davis.

"Now... how many of ya' wanna be in SOLDIER?" the brawny man asked.

Nearly everyone in the room raised their hand. Much to Cloud's surprise, Yuza wasn't one of them. Out of the corner of his eye, he saw Jadak glaring at his older brother. Yuza kept his eyes forward.

"Well, none of ya are getting anywhere if ya can't at least swing a sword," he continued. "Tomorrow, all of you are starting your official sword training. So make sure you idiots get out your aggression before class since I'm not gonna scrape your carcasses off this floor if you decide to stab each other. Dis-missed!"

The other cadets thundered by, leaving Cloud to trail behind in their wake.

Real sword training! Finally! With a slight bounce in his step, he headed off to the Mess Hall. He couldn't wait to tell Zack.

Angeal poked his head into Sephiroth's office. The general was bent over his desk as usual, long silver hair brushing the edge of the paper he was writing on. Angeal rapped his knuckles on the door frame, even though Sephiroth was probably already aware of his presence.

"Did you... get a chance to talk with Genesis?" he asked, getting right to the point.

Wordlessly, Sephiroth nodded.

Well. That was... maddeningly unhelpful. Angeal folded his arms. "And? How is he?"

"I believe you should go ask him yourself."

"Will I be endangering my life if I do that?"

Sephiroth shrugged. "Genesis is unpredictable," he said. "Regardless, you need to sort out whatever happened between the two of you."

Sighing in defeat, Angeal bid the general farewell and traipsed down the corridor to pay his childhood friend a visit. He paused in front of the door and took a deep breath before lifting his hand to knock. No turning back now. Angeal winced at the sound of a muffled curse, then a louder call for entry.

"Genesis? Can we talk?" he asked, stepping inside the redhead's office.

The look Genesis gave him was smoldering enough to melt a Blizzaga spell. Angeal immediately regretted listening to Sephiroth. "No," the redhead growled.

"Don't be like that. I just want to apologize. I should have confronted you directly instead of sneaking behind your back, and I'm sorry."

Scoffing, the redhead sneered. "Why hello Kettle, you're black."

Angeal furrowed his brow. "Excuse me?"

"Don't bother apologizing for things you're not sorry for," Genesis said harshly as he stood from his chair. "You're just about as sorry as I am on the rare occasion I actually manage to disarm Sephiroth."

"No, Genesis, it isn't like that—"

"The end justified the means, didn't it? After all, you got exactly the proof you wanted that I was an unfit teacher. Who really cares how you found out?"

"I do," Angeal snapped, losing his patience. "It was dishonorable of me and if there's anything I can do to make it up to you..."

Suddenly, the redhead's posture deflated. "Unless you can turn back time, I'm afraid you'll have to be satisfied with doing nothing," he sighed.

"Genesis, I really am sorry—"

"You got your wish."

"What?"

"I am no longer a teacher," he said icily, "so there is no need to fear the corruption of innocent youth."

No longer a teacher? "Wait, what happened?" Angeal asked.

Genesis laughed. "You mean your loyal hound hasn't told you yet?"

Shaking his head, the brunet folded his arms. "Evidently not."

"Then I suppose I'll let him tell you, since you're more likely to take his word over mine anyway."

Angeal opened his mouth to respond, but a knock sounded at the door.

"Come in," Genesis barked.

The door opened to reveal Instructor Davis, the man in charge of training the cadets. He glanced back and forth between the two Firsts for a few seconds before fixing his attention on Genesis and giving him a salute.

"Commander Rhapsodos, sir," he said by way of greeting and ignored Angeal completely. "I would be much obliged if you would pay my class a visit tomorrow for a sword demonstration."

Immediately, the redhead looked wary. "Why aren't you asking Sephiroth?"

"General Sephiroth said he was busy and recommended you, sir."

"Figures," Genesis muttered, rolling his eyes. He shot Angeal a look. "Don't tell me; you're busy tomorrow too?"

"Yes," the First nodded, "I'm going out on a mission tomorrow." He stood in astonishment, wondering why the redhead was trying to get out of an opportunity to show off when it dawned on him. Instructor Davis taught Cloud's class. So something really did happen. A stone of dread sank into Angeal's stomach.

"Very well," the commander grumbled. "I will... oblige you."

Davis looked confused for a few moments until he finally decided to take that as a 'yes.' "Very good, sir!" he grinned. Angeal couldn't help noticing he was missing a tooth. "Oh, and by the way, sir?"

Genesis arched an eyebrow.

"What in Shiva's name did you do to that little blond runt?"

Turning away, the redhead shook his head. "I'd rather not talk about it."

"Suit yourself," Davis shrugged as he moved to leave. "But whatever it was, he's sure as hell improved. Wish all my students were as motivated as he was today."

From the way Genesis' hand twitched, Angeal knew his friend was itching to run the burly instructor through. If things were really that bad, he wasn't looking forward to talking to Zack.

RegenesisX