Chapter 10

Pain radiates out from the balls of her feet, climbing up over the arches to shoot through her calves. Kate curls her toes inside her high heels, swaying from side to side as she watches couples twirl past on the dance floor. The ceremony ended hours ago; the formal photos have been taken, the dinner served and cake cut. With the exception of a few more candids of the reception, she's finished for the night.

A smile tugs at her lips and her camera flashes as a boy in the remnants of a suit - jacket shed and shirt untucked, his blue and yellow plaid bow tie askew- dips one of the flower girls in a move way beyond his single-digit years.

"You think he gives lessons?"

"I don't think you could afford him," Kate chuckles as the miniature Gene Kelly twirls the giggling girl around the parquet dance floor, drawing hoots and hollers from some of the guests. "And, honestly, I'm not sure that even he could make something out of those two left feet of yours."

"Hey," Rick argues, his breath rushing past her ear as one hand cups the dip of her waist, pulling her back snug against his front. "I did pretty well in the park that night."

Her stomach ripples at the memory. "Yeah, you did."

"And, Ms. Beckett, I will have you know that courtesy of that single exemplary lesson, one of my feet has decided to come out as ambidextrous." He taps the toe of his right dress shoe against the side of her heel. "It wasn't an easy decision, but I accept it for what it really is and think it would be best if I show it support by trying to dance yet again."

She twists her neck to look at him, his face just inches from her own. Only pride in her professionalism keeps her from tipping her head forward to run her mouth along his jawline.

"Is this your way of asking me to dance?"

"Would it be inappropriate for the hired help to take a twirl around the dance floor?"

Kate shakes her head and gives in, dropping a single kiss low on his cheek. His five o'clock shadow tickles her lips and even over the din of the chatter and music, she can hear him swallow.

"No," she says, Rick's hand tightening against her hip. "The bride invited us to stay and enjoy the party."

Turning her attention back to crowd, Kate snaps a few more shots of the kids and the other couples who have decided to join them on the dance floor. Tiny Romeo drops into the splits and she presses the button as the crowd erupts in applause.

"And I am now officially finished."

"Really?"

Kate turns to fully face him, his hand slipping around to rest at the small of her back as she reaches up to free her neck of the camera strap. Rick sways them from side to side and she raises an eyebrow at him.

"Yes, really. But before we can go play Fred and Ginger -"

"Baby and Johnny," Rick cuts in, bumping his hips up against hers in a way that makes her legs quiver and goosebumps lift along the valley of her spine.

"Wh - What?" She chokes, knuckles burning from the iron grip she has on the camera. White noise fills her ears and the spicy scent of his cologne floods her nostrils.

Leaning in, Rick smudges his grin along the crest of her flushed cheek. His hand slides all the way around her back, pulling her in tight as the other lifts to play along the length of her forearm.

"We're definitely more Dirty Dancing than Swing Time," he asserts, lips brushing at her earlobe. "Don't you think?"

Kate takes a deep breath, her head clearing with the rush of fresh oxygen. The music fades back in and she reaches for him, running her fingers over the smooth cotton of his dress shirt.

"Well, I have always wanted a castle of my very own," Kate breathes against the side of his neck, swallowing back a giggle when she feels his adam's apple bob. "But before we can have the time of our lives, I need to put this -" she presses the end of her camera lens into his chest - "away and we both need to get some sort of sustenance."

Rick nods, his eyes glassy in the flickering candlelight. "Food sounds good."

Reaching around behind herself, Kate snags his hand from her waist. She laces their fingers and leads him through the neat lines of tables, each adorned with crisp white linens and a vase of daisies. Two covered plates wait for them on a bare table in the a little room off the side of the hall, the rest of her gear stacked up against one wall. Rick makes a beeline for the food and Kate heads for her equipment, shaking her head as she listens to him moan in delight.

"Oh my God, Kate," he mumbles, cheeks chipmunked with seared tuna and asparagus tartlet. "You gotta try this."

"I will in a minute. Just gotta -" she twirls a finger at the array of bags by her feet - "take care of this first."

"You need help?"

"Nah, I got it. You eat." Squatting down next to pile, she fixes him with a sharp look. "But you'd better save me one of those tartlets."

Holding greasy fingers to his forehead, Rick gives her a mock salute before reaching for another puffed pastry appetizer. Kate rolls her eyes at him even as her cheeks lift in a smile. She examines the bags with diligence, cataloging every camera, lens, and memory card. She generally doesn't have issues at upscale events like this, but better safe than sorry.

Satisfied that everything remains where she left it, Kate secures her Nikon back in its case and stands. Smoothing a hand down the back of her thighs, she slides into the chair perpendicular to Rick's and offers him a whispered thanks when he pushes the plate - now containing only her half of the appetizers - toward her. Kate picks up one of the tartlets and as the pastry shell melts on her tongue, she echoes back his moan of delight from before.

"Stop that," Rick husks, knuckles blanching white around his fork.

"Why? You did it."

"Mine didn't sound quite so - " He flutters his free hand at her, fingers wiggling - "X-Rated."

Popping another piece onto her tongue, Kate lets out an exaggerated groan, the sound trapped low in her throat. Her ribs vibrate with it and want rushes hot through her middle as she watches the sky blue of his eyes turn stormy. Her heels hit the floor before she even has time to think about what she's doing.

"Come dance with me," she says, one hand extended.

Rick blinks, head rocking back on his neck. "What about the - Don't you want to finish eating?"

Prying the fork from his fingers, Kate tosses it to the table with a shake of her head.

"Later," she tells him, a victorious cheer rising up in her heated blood when he slips out of the chair without any further coaxing. She leads him toward the exit to the patio, his fingers thick and warm between her own. "Right now, I want to dance with you."

She'd wanted to dance with him out here earlier in the evening, when the sun was slipping down to kiss the horizon, its bright orange rays radiating out from behind the buildings and making the world glow golden. But this, now, with the lights dancing across the still water of the reflecting pool and the night breeze cool against her skin - this is perfect.

"There's no music," he points out as she turns to face him, arm already slipping around her waist, fitting right into the curve as if it was made to rest there.

The party pulses on the other side of the thick glass, a hundred guests dancing and drinking in raucous yet dignified celebration. The air vibrates with the beat of the music as Kate shifts her hips to one side and back again. Rick moves with her and they sway on the spot, the noise from the street below their only melody. With her heels on, they're almost the same height and Kate leans in, her cheek pressed to the hinge of his jaw.

"We don't need it."

It's not unusual for Kate to beg off from the invite to stay and join the party once her commitment has expired, choosing instead to spend the entire night after a wedding with her nose in the photographs- uploading, developing, editing. Her body burns for it. She loves the thrill of discovery, the way her heart leaps and stomach flutters as she works to uncover the magic preserved in her photographs. The love and devotion and commitment. The joy.

But tonight, for the first time, that fire has been eclipsed by another, this one far brighter than she has the will to resist. It's been crackling inside of her since the first night they met, growing hotter with each passing day. She thrums with it, her every single nerve ending sparking until her entire body vibrates. The tip of her nose, the soft spaces behind her knees, the sensitive skin at the base of her spine. It invigorates and scares her, body fluctuating between hot and cold as she wars with herself.

"Anything you want to share with the class?"

Rick's voice cuts through low buzz of her looping thoughts and she jerks in the circle of his arms, her temple bumping against the blunted point of his cheekbone.

"What?"

"I can feel you thinking."

"Oh, just my usual post-wedding stress that I didn't get any good pictures for them," Kate covers quickly, guiding them into a slow turn.

"Really? That's one thing I'm definitely not worried about," Rick counters, his low voice spilling down the side of her neck, thumb rubbing lazy circles across the back of her hand. "You were amazing out there. Whatever you charge is so not enough. Your work ethic, your eye for shots, your investment in making sure it's the best it can possibly be -" His hair tickles the end of her nose as he shakes his head - "The who's who of New York would be lucky to have you shoot their wedding, Kate. And you pretty much did it by yourself."

"You helped."

"I handed you things and held your shoes," he corrects with self-conscious chuckle. "Don't get me wrong, I really loved being here, watching you work. It was fascinating. Exhilarating. But I'm sure another photographer would have been more helpful."

"Maybe," Kate concedes with a shrug, her fingers playing with the fine hair along the back of his neck. "But not nearly as fun. Plus -" she adds, turning to coast her lips along the sharp cut of his jaw - "I couldn't do this with another photographer."

She grazes her mouth over the arched corner of his and Rick turns into her, his tongue soft and seeking at her bottom lip. A purr rises up out of the depths of her chest and she doesn't even try to swallow it back, to hide what he makes her feel. Vulnerability has always terrified her but with him it just might be worth it.

"Yeah," Rick breathes when they part, his lips hovering mere millimeters from hers, hand stroking at the jut of her hip. "I doubt Sophie would enjoy that very much. Well maybe she would, who knows. And it might give Laurent a heart attack if you did that to him."

Dropping her forehead to rest on against his chin, Kate huffs a half-hearted groan into the exposed skin at the base of this throat. "Please do not talk about Laurent when I'm kissing you. That's just-" She shimmies her shoulders in a faux shiver. "Wrong. It's so wrong."

Rick chuckles, a low rumbling sound from deep within his chest that has her shiver taking a sharp turn from theatrical to genuine. "No May-December romance for you then?"

"God, no," she says, bun rubbing against the nape of her neck as her head shakes. "Laurent is like a grandfather to me. He's my mentor. I knew I loved photography before I met him but he helped me understand why I love it. And how to be good at it."

"I envy you that, you know?"

Kate cocks her head to one side. "What?"

"That confidence. In your work. In yourself and your abilities."

Rick's eyes go wide at her bark of laughter. "You're kidding me, right?"

He shakes his head and she sighs.

"Rick, I literally just told you how I always worry about the quality of my shots after a wedding. I spend hours pouring over the pictures, my stomach in knots. I can't relax for weeks until the bride tells me she likes them. And this -" she waves a hand at the flowered archway above them, a leftover from the ceremony and pictures - "this isn't even really my career. My passion. It's like you with teaching. This is my day job. It pays the bills while I pursue the rest."

"But you are pursuing it," he says pulling her in close again, breath feathering at her temple. "That's something to be proud of."

"You have the same thing to take pride in."

Rick gives her a hum and takes the lead, his strong arms holding her securely as they travel lightly across the bricked patio. He spins them around with a fluid grace and her heart catches somewhere in her throat when he dips her backward, his smiling face framed by the clear night sky.

"Faker," Kate accuses, pinching his earlobe as he rights her. "How many women have you lured into giving you dancing lessons by pretending to have two left feet?"

"I am appalled at the suggestion," he huffs, the warm exhale ruffling the errant strands of hair that have slipped out of her bun. The ends tickle her neck and her muscles quiver. "This is all merely a product of your fantastic instruction."

"Oh, so you're just a fast learner then?"

"With the right teacher," Rick answers, dipping his chin toward her. "Though not too fast. I do like to linger. In certain circumstances."

"Is that a fact?"

"Indeed it is," he confirms, leaning in to press a hot kiss against her parted lips. "I'll have to show you sometime."

"Yes, you will," Kate murmurs, swallowing down a laugh as she steps back and his face falls. "But not right now. Right now, we need to pack up my gear and head out." She points at the reception hall, the crowd considerably thinner. "Party's over."

Taking step forward, Rick spreads his arms wide, body silhouetted against the Manhattan skyline. A wide, beaming smile splits his cheeks and Kate rocks on her toes, struggling with the urge to press herself against him once more, to feel his arms wrapped snuggly around her middle.

"Your pack mule awaits."

Rick pants as they hike up the flight of stairs to her apartment. Bags bounce off the walls and the railings and Kate winces, sending up a silent prayer to the photography gods that her cameras are well protected.

"You could have let me carry some of that," she reminds him, waving a hand at the at least fifty pounds of photography equipment draped over his shoulders. "It's not like I haven't lugged it all over the city by myself before."

"I was trying to be chivalrous, dammit. But you -" he huffs, leaning against the wall next to her front door, sweat beading up along his hairline - "You could have let me order a cab. Or an Uber."

She could have, yeah. She probably should have.

But -

Rolling her shoulders back, Kate pushes the thought away. Not tonight. Shoving her key into the lock, she pushes open her door, waving Rick in ahead of her. He stops in the middle of the living room, his entire body sagging under the weight of his load.

"It's a waste of money," she says, feeding him her standard excuse as she slides the door back along the track. "Here, let me help you."

Together, they unwind the straps from his neck and shoulders. Kate piles the equipment next to her desk and kicks off her shoes. She pulls the bobby pins from her hair and scratches at her scalp, sighing.

"Much better," she declares, aching toes curling into the balls of her feet as she turn back to Rick. "You want something to drink?"

He nods. "Sure."

"I have wine," she offers. "And coffee, but it might be a little late for that."

"Wine's good," Rick agrees, following her over to the kitchen.

Kate waves him into one of the mismatched stools at the island. She can feel his eyes tracking her as she putters around the tiny space, pulling down glasses and tugging the bottle half empty bottle of white out of her freshly stocked refrigerator.

"Oh, I have some strawberries too," Kate tosses over her shoulder. "Sound good?"

"Yeah," he agrees after a couple of beats. "That's fine."

Dropping the plastic flat of berries onto the island, Kate looks at him, butterflies erupting in her stomach."Are you okay?" She asks, trying and failing to conceal the waiver in her voice as she reaches for the bottle and pours them each a glass. "You've been quiet since we left the wedding."

"Oh, yeah," he says, the graze of his finger sending sparks up her arm when he takes the wine from her. "I'm just -"

"What?"

Abandoning the glass, Rick sighs, hands falling to the table. He stares at his fingers and Kate feels her heart sink. This - Shit, this cannot be good.

"I'm just thinking about something you said. About pursuing dreams and how we both have that to be proud of." He sighs again, the heavy breeze of it rustling the leaves of the strawberries. "I - I'm not. I don't."

Kate scoots around the island and sits down next to him, a comforting hand braced on his thigh. "What are you talking about? You write every day, Rick. For hours."

He nods, hair flopping down into his averted eyes. "Yeah, I do. But I -" A frustrated growl rumbles in his chest and Rick pushes back from the island. He strides across to the windows and looks out, shoulders rolled forward and hands stuffed into his pockets. "This is hard for me to talk about."

"You don't have to tell me anything you don't want to," Kate assures him, the knot in her stomach loosening as she spins around to look at his hunched back. Whatever this big secret of his is, it's not relationship ending. Not if it's just about his writing.

"No, I want to. I do. It's just not something I like to talk about."

"Rick -"

"When I was twenty, I wrote a novel. I was young and arrogant and fancied myself the next Great American Author. I got an agent and sold the manuscript, all before my twenty-first birthday."

Kate pads over to him, her hand slipping into the crook of his elbow. She leans into his side, watches his reflection in the glass. The sadness in his eyes makes her chest clench and she presses a gentle kiss to the ridge of his bicep.

"That sounds amazing."

His brittle laugh shatters at their feet. "It would have been if the book hadn't been so egregiously awful."

"I'm sure it wasn't -" Kate interjects. She knows his kind of passion, has seen ample evidence of it in only the short time they've been dating. No one has that type of intensity without the talent to accompany it.

"No, it was," he cuts in, brushing off her reassurances with a shrug of his shoulder. "I haven't been able to pick it up in over twenty years, but trust me when I tell you it was the height of literary pretension. Overwrought and overwritten and just plain bad. I was panned in every major literary review in the country."

He sighs again and Kate shifts, slipping her body between his and the bay of windows. She wraps her arms around his waist, squeezing him tightly, hoping that at least some of it can reach that defeated twenty-one year old kid she can hear in his voice.

"What happened?" She asks, his heart thumping a steady beat against her cheek.

"My agent cut me off like I was a cancer. I ended up having to pay back most of my advance. I didn't even manage to sell a quarter of the first - and only - printing." His chin bumps against the top of her head as he talks, hands spread wide over her back. "It was humiliating, Kate. I had all these lofty ideas about what my career as a writer would be. Interviews with Charlie Rose and Terry Gross, honorary teaching positions at prestigious universities. Being able to make a living off my words."

"But you still write," Kate argues, tilting her head back to look up at him. "You can still have that."

Rick shrugs, his unfocused eyes still staring at the nonexistent view out her window. "I write but I don't do anything with it."

"What do you mean?"

"I didn't write for a long time after all of that. I couldn't. It took me about ten years to be able to face it again," he confesses and her heart aches at the thought of him suppressing his talent and passion for so long. "And once I started - Well, I have something like fifteen finished manuscripts in a box at my apartment. They're just sitting there, gathering dust."

"You haven't tried to find another agent? To get published again?"

"No." Rick shakes his head, finally tilting his gaze down to meet hers. "I can't go through all of that again. Once was enough. More than."

"Rick, I'm -"

"No," he says, lifting a finger to press against her lips. Her stomach does a somersault and she takes a deep, steadying breath. "It's okay. I've mostly made peace with it. But I wanted you to know." His hand moves to cup the side of her face. "You are amazing, Kate. So much about you astounds me. Your passion and your drive and your talent. You need to recognize that in yourself. Don't ever doubt it."

Hands fisted in the back of his shirt, Kate presses herself up onto her toes. Their lips meet with an intensity unmatched by any of their previous kisses. Unmatched by any other kiss in her life. Rick's hand sinks into her hair, twisting the strands around his fingers as he devours her mouth. Kate moans and he steps forward, pressing her up against the window.

"Stay," she whispers, her fingers scuttling around to work on the buttons of his shirt. "Stay with me tonight."

His hand slides down the back of her neck, thumb brushing at the smooth metal zipper nestled between her shoulder blades. "Are you sure?"

Pushing off the window, Kate guides him backward across the living room. They pass behind the ornate Chinese screen and she backs him up to the bed, lips playing along the newly exposed skin of his chest.

Hands planted on his shoulders, she pushes, grinning as he bounces on his back on the mattress. The skirt of her dress rustles against the bedspread as she climbs up over him, knees planted on either side of his hips. His hands coast up the length of her back as she leans over him, one hand planted next to his hand and the other reaching for his belt.

"I'm sure," Kate says, her hair a curtain around their faces. "And - " she brushes her nose along the side of his, holding herself just out of reach of his seeking lips - "I want you to linger."

Thank you for reading. Your thoughts and comment are always appreciated.