A/N: Thank you, elbeewoods.
I own nothing.
"Let's go," Jax said with a smirk as he revved his Dyna's engine. Tara laughed before placing a quick kiss on Jax's lips and stashing some brownies in the motorcycle's saddlebag. Jax automatically took off his black hoodie and passed it to Tara. Winter in Charming was laughable to most people but 60 degrees was on the chillier side no matter where you lived. Tara took her time lowering Jax's hoodie so he could get a good view of her new outfit; it was bought courtesy of her money looting ability and Donna's lift to Stockton mall. She was wearing a soft, light-weight, plum-colored sweater that showed more cleavage than was polite for company. The purple color made her porcelain skin glow underneath the bright moonlight. That, combined with her tight, dark washed jeans and black, four inch heels made Jax want to lead Tara to the nearest bed available. Jax idly wondered if Tara had a matching lingerie set on underneath her outfit; the thought made his cock stand at attention immediately. But before Jax could produce a good visual of that image Tara had lowered his hoodie below her torso and moved towards the passenger seat. Tara then lifted her right leg in order to straddle the bike before settling into position. She weaved her arms around Jax's waist and he thought for the hundredth time that it was the most wonderful feeling in the world.
"I think you need to stay by my side tonight," Jax commented as he felt the length of Tara's body press into his back. The thought of a bunch of drunk teenagers admiring his girlfriend's body was enough to make his heart race and teeth clench. Tara's arms squeezed softly around Jax's waist. "Wouldn't have it any other way, Teller."
This Saturday night was going to be a little different from the typical talking, drinking and smoking at Opie's. Word had spread that Oswald's storage facility was empty. All of Oswald's fuel and lumber trucks were on the road and all that remained was a huge, empty space in the middle of nowhere where the junior class could party. It was near the Wahema reservation but its residents could care less about what happened outside their territory. Charming police would have no reason to patrol that far out of town and the underclassmen couldn't crash unless they had transportation. A perfect location for the upperclassmen to drink, smoke and play music. The event was going to be attended by every 11th grader at Charming High. Everything had been coordinated by Jax and Opie and no one wanted to miss a SONS party.
Jax and Opie had lifted one of Gemma's marijuana plants from her sunroom and had spent all morning rolling joints to sell for a dollar a pop. Tara used the leftover leaves to bake brownies to sell as well. Donna's brother and a few prospects had purchased beer and alcohol with the money the juniors had pooled together for the occasion. Plus, the fast approaching holidays and school break caused the students to be in an even more festive mood than usual, and everyone planned on getting drunk and high and having a good time.
Jax had another reason to be in great spirits as well. He could tell Tara was just about ready to have sex. Or maybe more accurately, make love. Lately Tara's hands and mouth had developed minds of their own and Jax was more than happy to let her explore every inch of his body. Jax had resisted doing anything to hurry or force Tara's decision, and in a tiny place in the back of his head Jax was relieved that it had taken so long. If Tara had been any other girl he wouldn't have had any hesitations about sleeping with her and showing her a good time. At an earlier point in his life Jax would have thought it ludicrous to wait a whole month to have sex, actually two if he counted when they first started hanging out together. He knew enough about female anatomy by this point to guarantee that a girl would get off with him. Jax had never minded letting his more experienced conquests take the lead and show him exactly where their trigger points were. The croweaters were especially good for doing that, and Jax figured it never hurt to learn some new things in the bedroom. It was always good to have some tricks in your back pocket because each girl was different and that was probably why he got so many repeat visits in his bed.
But Tara would be different. He loved Tara and considered her to be the most precious thing in his world. She wouldn't be some random pussy that he could toss aside once he bust his nuts. If Tara had been someone who just wanted to have a wild time, Jax knew he could oblige with his eyes closed. But Jax didn't have a road map for when the women meant more than a casual lay, and had never even seen any of his future brothers with someone they considered more than a piece of pussy. Jax knew he could go to Opie for advice, but he considered the situation to be a private matter, not even for his best friend's ears, and come to think about it, Opie had never spilled the details about any intimate moments he had with Donna. Jax knew whatever moment he had with Tara in that arena would be magical for him, but he was afraid he wouldn't be able to provide Tara with as wonderful an experience. Tara was a virgin, and the thought of not pleasing Tara her first time around was enough to make him forego the whole event entirely and just stick to shirtless kissing and fondling. Jax thought it was insane for him to even make peace with that choice because he couldn't remember a time since he was fifteen when he didn't at least get a blowjob several nights a week.
Jax was just about to maneuver his bike down the driveway when his pager started vibrating on his hip. Jax knew it couldn't be Opie calling; Opie would know he was on the road and wouldn't want to cause a distraction. That only left one person, someone who wouldn't give a damn about disturbing others if it suited her needs. Jax quickly decided to ignore it, telling Tara that it could wait until they made it to Oswald's.
A loud, persistent ringing sound began as soon as Jax finished his comment. Tara looked puzzled for a minute before hopping off the Harley and dashing to her front porch. "It might be my dad," Tara called out as she unlocked the door. Sometimes the police station would call to let Tara know they had her father for "safety reasons" but she decided to keep that tidbit to herself.
Jax walked through Tara's doorway just as she lifted the phone and greeted the caller. Jax knew the voice on the other side of the receiver couldn't be a pleasant one from the way Tara furrowed her eyebrows and set her chin.
"It's your mother," Tara whispered towards Jax as she covered the mouthpiece with her hand. It was Jax's turn to look puzzled. He had taken great pains to keep his girlfriend away from Gemma and her thinly-veiled hostility. Jax had never been involved with a girl this long and he knew his mom wouldn't take kindly to anyone she thought would compete with her status as number one. How in the hell did she get Tara's number? Jax shook his head in irritation; did it even matter at this point?
Jax walked towards Tara and took the phone from her hand. "What?" Jax hoped his resentment rang loud and clear in Gemma's ears.
"Where are you?" demanded his mother.
Jax didn't even try to rein in his temper. "Where in the hell do you think I am? You called me!" Jax was exasperated. He knew Gemma made it a point to be privy to the happenings of his life. There was never a moment when she didn't know about Jax's whereabouts whether he told her or not. Gemma rarely shut down his actions but she always knew what was going down in his life. At times it was a pain in the ass but he tried to cut her some slack because the cause was Thomas' death.
"You need to come back. I need you to run to the house and pick something up for the club."
"Are you fucking kidding me?" Jax couldn't believe his mother would ask him to do this. After all, she had several prospects at her command to run her bitch errands, and she had to know that Jax had helped organize the party he and Tara were attending.
"Won't take too long. Besides, you're not fashionable unless you're at least an half-hour late."
Jax weighed his options. He knew he could just ignore his mother's request, but that would result in God knows what kind of punishment. Gemma might not have laid a hand on his ass since he was five, but she was still a master at making his life miserable if she felt he had crossed the line of respectfulness. Besides that, she was screwing the president of the Sons of Anarchy, someone he may have to answer to someday, and the last thing he needed was for Clay to hold a grudge against him for not being an obedient son to his old lady.
"Jesus Christ, what could be so important?"
Gemma knew she had him from his pause, and made her voice sound thankful. "Money from the safe to back the bets being made." Jax still knew this was a bullshit errand because she could have sent the SONs treasurer, Bobby, to get the funds, but it would be best to get the task over with so he would be left alone for the rest of the night.
"Give me thirty minutes." As Jax hung up the phone he turned sideways to glance at his girlfriend. She remained silent, but had a puzzled look on her face. "I'm sorry. Got to deal with Gemma first." Jax's voice was apologetic.
Tara shrugged her shoulders. "Let's get it done, then."
Jax released a breath he didn't know he was holding. As usual, his girlfriend didn't question the demands occasionally placed on him, simply accepted them and rode along. He was grateful for Tara's mindset, and it only confirmed to him that they were meant to be together. Lord knows he would need her understanding when the time came for him to prospect.
Tara's stomach became queasy when Jax rolled through the gates at Teller-Morrow; it was her first time at the site. Jax had to wait for the guards to recognize him before they opened the security doors, and Tara couldn't help but wonder what was so precious on the property that it needed to be protected by angry looking men with military guns in their hands. Tara couldn't help but take in a good visual of the layout as Jax slowed his motorcycle and backed into a parking space next to what she assumed was the SONs meetinghouse. What stood before her sent her mind into a state of fear and her body into a "flight or fight" mode. Dozens of hardened-looking men in leather vests were scattered along the perimeters of the Teller-Morrow auto shop as well as on the porch of the Sons of Anarchy's clubhouse - the place that incurred the gossip and notoriety of Charming's citizens. Men and scantily-clad women were either sitting on benches in front of the clubhouse's entrance or smoking blunts and drinking along the outskirts of the building. A fire had been lit in a couple of open garbage cans and produced an eerie glow that highlighted the inhabitants of the surrounding area. On the right-hand side of the clubhouse was a boxing ring with two men on either side preparing for a fight. Whoever wasn't lurking among the grounds of the repair shop or the clubhouse was surrounding the ring and giving cheers to one or the other fighters involved.
Jax was wordless as he left the bike's driver seat and tugged urgently on Tara's arm to remove her from the rear. Tara had remained silent when Jax pulled into his house's driveway a few minutes ago and had her wait in the living room while he entered his mother's bedroom. He had exited the room with what appeared to be several thousand's worth of cash. Tara had been speechless at the amount of money Jax was holding and she got the distinct feeling that Jax was relieved she didn't make a comment about the funds. Jax had stuffed the money into one of his bike's saddlebags and had repositioned his bucket on his head before Tara had even reached for her helmet. The ride to Teller-Morrow had been silent, and Tara had felt an anxiety usually reserved for when her father returned home after a long binge.
"Hey, Jax, how's it going, man?" A man with soft dark ringlets, big blue eyes, and a well-groomed goatee called as Jax pulled her towards what appeared to be an office. Jax nodded curtly but didn't stop his gait towards a small, lighted room that appeared to be empty at first glance. Tara followed Jax up the steps to the office and stood behind him as he addressed a woman with dark brown hair, an all-black outfit and heels that Tara could never manage. Jax used a tight clip as he spoke. "Who do I give the house to?"
"And good evening to you, too. Aren't you going to introduce me to your friend? Been long overdue." The woman asked in a saccharine sweet voice.
"Mom, Tara, Tara, my mother." Jax reluctantly took two steps to the side so Tara could get a full view of his mom.
"Pleasure's all mine," Gemma drawled before Tara had a chance to speak. "I've heard a lot about Gerald's Knowles' daughter. Couldn't wait to meet you for myself." Tara felt a dread that surpassed anything she had felt since her mom's illness. Jax's mom turned her head towards her only son. "Give Bobby the funds so Tara and I can become acquainted." Tara's alarm became even more intense as she felt Jax's reluctance to leave her alone with his mother.
"Don't worry, I won't keep her long." Jax's mom's voice should have been soothing but made the hairs on Tara's head stand at attention.
Jax narrowed his eyes at his mother but left the office as if to finish his instructions as soon as possible. For a brief moment Tara hated Jax for leaving her in such a vulnerable position.
Once Jax was out of earshot Gemma began her attack. "So you're the latest pussy my son is trying to hit." Tara was so shocked by the language Gemma used that she could only stare in disbelief. "I have to hand it to you, you've been able to keep my son's attention for the longest I've ever witnessed."
The intellectual side of Tara's brain began ringing bells and reminded her to be courteous to adults no matter how vile they were. Tara's survival instinct won the battle in her brain though and took control of her mouth.
"I'm sorry, but Jax rarely mentions you, Mrs., um, Teller? I know you'll be changing your name soon so I'm not sure what to call you." Tara used her nicest smile as she spoke; she knew the dig would take Gemma by surprise. Tara had no idea whether Clay or Gemma would be getting married but she wanted Gemma to know her son knew everything about their relationship.
The comment took Gemma off-guard. Jax had actually opened up his life to Tara. No man did that unless he planned on having a long relationship with a woman. Not only that, Tara's little aside reminded Gemma of how her son felt about Clay sharing her bed. A mean little smile briefly crossed Gemma's face. She knew Tara was smart and resourceful but had no idea she could be fierce. Tara wasn't going to let anyone walk over her and Gemma had to give the girl points for that. It was making a little more sense why Jax had fallen for her, and Gemma knew Jax was hooked the moment he came to Charming Gardens to talk to her. What she hadn't known was besides her looks and body, Tara possessed a strength and sense-of-self that was quieter than Jax's but just as strong. Gemma had to acknowledge to herself that this bitch might be around for a long time and she had better get used to it. Still, that wouldn't prevent her from trying to sabotage their relationship whenever she could.
"Don't worry, you won't be around long enough to find out." Gemma cut her eyes at Tara so forcefully she couldn't help but tremble slightly.
"You must know you and Jax won't be a long-term thing. You're just a challenge until he finds something better to focus on. Evidently your schoolbooks didn't teach you that." Tara noted how much pleasure Gemma Teller seemed to take while cutting her down.
"Did you really think going with Jax to get his tattoo meant anything?" Gemma couldn't help but let the scathing in her voice show. When Gemma first saw Jax's tattoo she confronted Happy about it. And when Happy told her that Jax had taken Tara to JT's gravesite and brought Tara to the tattoo parlor she had been furious. She had always thought his first tattoo and JT visit was something they would do together. Instead, this piece of gash had not only beat her to it on both counts, she had helped Jax choose the tattoo for JT's commemoration.
"That boy would do anything if he thought it would help him get in someone's panties."
Tara told herself that Gemma was lying; no one who wasn't sincere could have expressed as much emotion or vulnerability on that day. Tara closed her eyes and tried to control her breathing; she knew any sign of weakness would heighten the woman's attack and she couldn't let her get the upper hand. "Well, I guess you'll never know since you weren't with him."
Gemma was furious by this point; she couldn't believe some sixteen-year-old actually thought she could go toe-to-toe with her about her son. Gemma needed to go all-out on Tara. She'd be damned if she let Tara take her place in Jax's life and interfere with his future.
"Are you really deluded enough to think you can fit into my son's life? A sweet, little innocent girl like you who leaves every summer for San Diego with her cousin? Do you really think a couple of months of learning my son is enough to handle him? Don't kid yourself. Your little summers with your cousin haven't given you the training to handle my son and all that comes with the package. We all know your plans for the future: a life in San Diego free from your drunk father and the redneck citizens of your hometown. So long to the place that gave you roots and a sense of belonging. What kind of person do you think you are, with no loyalty to your father or the people who carried you through your mother's death? Do yourself a favor and run away to cousin Pat before your feelings get hurt." Gemma's eyes were steely and they stared like lasers at Tara's face.
Jax reappearance prevented Tara's rebuttal but he knew from the color on Tara's face the women's conversation hadn't been pretty. Jax embraced Tara's stiff body in his arms as he directed his words towards his mother. "Understand this, mom: Tara is here to stay and you need to get used to it. I thought Clay was doing a better job at keeping you in check, but maybe I underestimated the strength of your relationship. After all, I'm sure no one could take the place of my father in your heart." Jax's words were cutting and Gemma actually felt nauseous for about thirty seconds after Jax's statement.
"What's crawled up your ass, Jackson? I thought you would want me and your girlfriend to connect." Gemma's tone was sweet but her eyes told Jax about the malice that had been previously displayed. Jax grabbed Tara's hand. "We need to roll."
"Stay a little while longer, Jackson." It was more than a request but Gemma's voice had gone from fake sincerity to almost pleading. "I hardly ever see you between school and your….extra-curricular activities." Gemma took another hard look at Tara and Jax couldn't believe his mother would hold a grudge against someone who actually encouraged him to attend school.
"The club's having an inauguration party for the new boxing ring and fight club," Gemma said as she nodded towards the noise outside. "You need to be here and show your face for a minute." Gemma took a deep breath. "Clay also has an announcement to make. It concerns you, too, and it'll happen in a couple of minutes." Jax saw his mother's body tense and something akin to guilt cloud her face; he gave his mother a weary stare in response. He had no idea what it could be about and that caused his body to tense as well.
Tara shifted uncomfortably and peeked at Jax's face. "Five minutes." Jax's tone was gruff and Gemma looked as though she might argue but decided against it. Jax pulled on Tara's hand and led her out the office door.
Jax sighed. He had tried to keep Tara as far away from Teller-Morrow and the clubhouse as he could. And of course, the day she officially visits is the day the club breaks in their newest toy.
Tara had been confused when Gemma used the word inauguration but now it made sense. Black and white balloons were loosely tied to the boxing ring's ropes and the entire set-up looked shiny and new. Tara had no doubt it would look totally different soon if the expressions on the fighters' faces were any indication. Another man with a vest was holding a clipboard in front of the ring and scribbling information while people called out dollar amounts. The whole environment held a barbaric feel and Tara squeezed onto Jax's hand in anxiety.
"Come on," Jax said softly as he led Tara through the bodies around the clubhouse porch and into the building. The huge main room smelled like sweat, weed, and cheap perfume. There were almost double the number of people inside than outdoors, and the room's floor vibrated from the music and bass sounds playing from a huge speaker. A huge white cloud hung above the entire room due to all of the weed and cigarettes being smoked. Bottles of beer and tequila were passed around by guys who didn't look much older than her and Jax but who were wearing leather vests with the word PROSPECT sewn on the back. The sight might have passed for a sleazy bar on a Saturday night except that all the men sported leather and corrupt, lethal looks while the women looked and dressed like prostitutes and porn stars. The whole scene renewed Tara's sense of intimidation and she swallowed hard to try to hide her panic.
Jax could feel Tara's anxiety and led her past the great room and into a small hallway with doors on either side. Moans and bedframe squeaks could be heard from behind a couple of doors and Tara turned away from them in distaste. Jax calmly led Tara further back until he opened the last door in the hall and scooted her into a room that resembled a dorm bedroom. Tara analyzed the cleanliness of the blankets on top of the bed before hesitantly sitting on its very edge. Jax leaned his body near the doorframe and watched Tara intently.
"So how do you like the clubhouse so far?" Jax tried to joke but the words came out jilted and unsure.
Tara shrugged and gave a tight smile. "I guess it's another day at the office for you."
It was Jax's turn to shrug. "Yeah, I guess it is." Jax couldn't deny this was a typical sight in his life on any given weekend, but this was the first time he felt embarrassed about it. He lifted himself off the wall and turned towards the door.
"Wait here. Lock the door behind me." Tara did as instructed and sat back down. Her mind was going a mile a minute trying figure out how she could fit into this dynamic, or if she'd even want to. Tara knew her world would be framed around this if she remained Jax's girlfriend. Slutty women who wore skirts that covered less than some thongs. Street-hardened men who had thousands of dollars at their disposal and who knows what they did to earn it. And these were actually minor concerns compared to Jax's mother. The thoughts in her head made her dizzy and she desperately needed a toke to ease her tension.
A knock on the door distracted Tara from her thoughts and she timidly unlocked the door and let Jax in. He was caring two beers and a blunt and she had to smile despite herself. "Thought you might need this. I know I do," Jax chuckled as he relocked the door and pulled up a chair next to Tara's seat. Together they drank their beer and shared puffs. Jax was quiet and so was Tara. They were both trying to regroup and make sense of how the world outside their door would change their relationship.
They were both startled out of their meditations by a sharp rap on the door. "Time to go outside," said a low voice in the hallway. "Clay's about to speak."
Tara and Jax looked at each other before holding hands and walking out the room. Jax prayed that Tara holding his hand was a sign she was willing to handle this, the club, hell, SAMCRO in general. Her hand remained inside his but her face was poker-faced and it disturbed him that she would use that look around him.
Slowly they joined the masses out of the clubhouse and into the night's darkness. Jax could see Clay standing in the middle of the boxing ring while dozens of club members and croweaters surrounded him from below. Clay looked like a king holding court from his position and Jax figured he was loving every minute of it.
"Ladies and brothers, thank you for coming out tonight to help us celebrate the newest addition to our SAMCRO family." Clay's arm performed a quick air sweep of the boxing ring and there were several chuckles among the audience as Clay continued. "We know a lot of you traveled quite aways be with us tonight and we feel blessed to have so much support. You know SAMCRO never holds back when it comes to hospitality and tonight will be no different except for the show that's about to commence." Loud shouts and claps punctured the air after Clay mentioned the impending fight.
"But before we begin, there's something else I want to announce. Something that has truly made me the luckiest man in the world but will sadden all of the eligible young ladies with us tonight." Jax felt his stomach drop; what could Clay be getting at? Tara grabbed his right hand and held it tightly. She had a gut feeling about the "young ladies" joke and wondered irrationally if she had some sort of fortune-telling ability that had remained dormant until now. Tara took a quick peek at Jax; his expression told her he was confused in general. If she was right about what was about to happen Jax would need a double dose of comfort and she began to slowly stroke her free hand against Jax's arm. Throughout all these thoughts Tara couldn't help but smirk; her previous dig at Gemma about a name change had hit harder than she realized.
Clay became serious. "It's no secret how JT's death affected the charters, but it hit SAMCRO the hardest. The only thing that pulled us through, our one saving grace, was Gemma Teller. JT was her husband, but she put her grief aside to help JT's brothers heal from their loss. It wasn't long before I became more and more dependent on her selflessness and eventually I realized I was in love with her. And the really bizarre thing is that she loves me back." A few chuckles emerged from the crowd.
"I wanted to tell my family the news. Hell, I'd shout if from the mountaintops if I could. I asked Gemma to marry me this morning and she said yes." Happy murmurs began to spread through the audience. "And now, may I please introduce my fiancée, Gemma Teller, soon to be Gemma Morrow." A huge amount of clapping and cheering took place as Gemma stepped into the boxing ring. Even more cheers were produced when Gemma and Clay embraced and kissed each other.
Jax couldn't prevent his body from shaking; his emotions felt razor-sharp and were combined into a crazy mix of anger and betrayal. Gemma and Clay hadn't had the balls to tell him privately; they knew Jax would be against the wedding but evidently his feelings didn't matter to his mother anymore. They were both cowards and he wanted to punch anything and everything that was next to him and cry for this disloyalty against SAMCRO. Was this the type of "brotherhood" he wanted to be a part of? Jax thought wildly.
Tara wrapped her arms against Jax's waist and tugged against him until he looked at her. The shock was still prominent on his face and she tried to soothe him. "I'm sorry, baby. But at least it's out in the open now. You won't have to deal with Clay lurking around your house and trying to play like he's just checking up on a friend." Tara thought that at least now it was official and maybe that would help Jax deal with their impending matrimony.
Jax gave a bitter smile in response. "Yeah, instead of him lurking around my house he'll actually be sharing my house now." Tara could only respond with a hug.
Jax barely had time to process the announcement before several men and women approached to offer their support. Jax forced his features into a happy expression and soon Jax was being swarmed by well wishers; Tara had to let go of Jax's hand to allow people to have more access to him. Tara thought the safest course of action would be to walk towards the motorcycles: it was pretty deserted by the vehicles and would give her some distance away from the club and its members.
Tara had been standing alone for several minutes when a voice registered in the darkness. "What're you doing over here by yourself, little girl? Don't you know the boogie man could come and get ya?" Tara looked up and was confronted by the same dark-haired man who had greeted Jax when they arrived. His tone was nice enough but the lewd looks he was giving her gave her the creeps. Tara smiled hesitantly. "Oh, I'm fine. Just waiting for Jax so we can go." The man looked as though he was going to say something else but thankfully a booming voice called his attention.
"Tig! Stop being a pervert and find someone who isn't underage," an extremely tall, gruff looking man commanded. Tara vaguely thought the man sounded like he was out-of-breath, like he'd just come back from jogging. Tig winked as he began to walk away. "See you in a couple of years," he smirked as he directed himself towards the clubhouse. Tara gave a silent word of thanks to the man who took Tig away. It was all becoming too much: the skanks, the club members, hell, the whole thing in general. The boxing match had started and Tara could hear punches land on the men's faces while the crowd shouted and urged the fighters on. Tara felt like she was on the set for the filming of a modern-day Caligula movie and her eyes searched for Jax in the crowd. Tara's eyes found him quickly but not in the manner she expected: two young, barely dressed women were hugging on Jax while he smiled and listened politely to their conversation. Before Tara could think rationally she bolted towards the girls and said "back off" with a sneer she didn't even know she possessed. The girls slowly looked at the hoodie that engulfed Tara's body and gave Jax a look that said Really?
Tara knew Jax was dealing with some heavy shit right now but she had had enough. She turned to face Jax and said, "We need to go. NOW." Jax didn't have time to answer before Tara had sprinted towards motorcycle and picked up a helmet.
"Tara, I'm sorry. I know it was a lot to deal with tonight." Jax tried to diffuse Tara's anger as he helped her fit her helmet. Tara was silent as she waited for Jax to sit on the driver's seat and lift the kickstand. "Let's get to our party now." Tara secured her place on the passenger seat and Jax wasted no time driving out of the Teller-Morrow lot.
"I want to go home," Tara said before Jax directed his bike towards the bi-way. Jax turned his head slightly to make sure he heard her. "I said I want to go home. Just drop me off and then head on out." Tara felt like a royal bitch considering the blow Jax had just received but Gemma, the clubhouse and the marital announcement was too much. She needed to take a breath and figure things out.
Jax knew that was the last thing he should do if he wanted to keep Tara in his life. He knew if he took her to the Knowles' house she would think long and hard about everything she'd seen tonight and reconsider being in his life. Hell, what sane person would want to deal with that unless he'd been around it since birth? Jax knew the only chance he had with Tara at this point was to get her to focus only on him and what they shared together. Jax knew that the only way he could endure the clusterfuck known as Gemma and Clay was by having Tara by his side.
Tara loosened her arms when they began approaching her house and became disconcerted when Jax didn't slow down. "Where are we going?" Tara demanded but Jax ignored her until he reached Charming Gardens.
Jax had barely turned off the bike's ignition before Tara jumped off and began gunning towards her house. Jax jumped after her and took her hand. "Tara, please, let's talk."
"Talk? About what? It's obvious I'm not the girl for you, Jax. There is no way in hell I'd ever fit into your lifestyle or win your mother's approval." Tara tried to blink back the tears that were brimming in her eyes. "There's no sense in dragging this out."
"Don't I get a say in this? This isn't just about you – it's about us." Jax's tone was pleading. "Five more minutes, that's all I ask."
Tara's silence lasted for so long Jax was scared she would tell him to fuck off and start running. Finally, Tara nodded her head but released her hand from his. "Five minutes."
The miles of dark acreage in front of Tara should have caused her a bit of unease. However, the moon still gleamed in the sky and provided a bright light, and the Gardens always filled Tara with a sense of serenity. Normally Tara would have said the same about Jax but Gemma's comments and the clubhouse mayhem were still fresh in her mind. She couldn't separate Jax from the previous events and it scared her to think that Jax had grown up with in such an unsavory lifestyle.
Jax was grateful he'd thought of the Gardens – it was quiet, empty and free from distractions. The Gardens were composed of three sections: community plots, greenhouse, and storage units. The community plots were similar to farmland and began an additional mile up the road. Instead, Jax had stopped his bike in front of the sizable, enclosed greenhouse. Tara wordlessly traveled up the few steps that led to the nursery portion of the Gardens. The crystal-clear glass walls were bright with the moon's beams and held dozens of flowers and plants in all shapes and sizes. There was no door to open, no type of security alarm to set off – Tara simply stepped through a makeshift, wooden, trellis-type walk-though and entered the greenhouse. Tara thought with more than a little irony that the criminal types she'd just left at the clubhouse were the main reasons it was safe to enter the nursery without any fear. Tonight the three-tiered fountain located in the middle of the room was surrounded by bright red poinsettias. Poinsettia plants hung at all different lengths from the roof frames as well as covered most of the floor space in the greenhouse. The petals were a beautiful sight that covered the hard dingy floor like a lush red lawn but she knew it would be short-lived. The Gardens would be starting their holiday fundraising soon and had had dozens shipped to the site to sell to the community.
Tara carefully walked through the mass of holiday plants on the ground until she found a small bench she knew was located past the fountain. Jax followed Tara silently and sat beside his lifeline; he knew if he lost Tara he would suffer a wound that would hurt more than Thomas and JT's deaths combined.
"That isn't me," Jax began. He bent his torso until it was almost parallel to his thighs and nervously used his hands to grab handfuls of the long blonde tresses on his head. "I mean, it's not the only part of me."
"But it will be soon," Tara stated quietly. A silence that used to be accepted between them with ease was deafening to their ears and Jax knew he needed to find the words to make her understand.
"What you saw, it's not all the club was meant to be. My father didn't handle the club like that. He didn't hold those type of parties and he wouldn't have agreed to a bunch of boxers breaking each other's noses at his repair shop." Jax abruptly realized that what he said was true. Sure the club had its share of celebrations when he was alive but nothing like the ones Clay had been holding for the past several months. Jax and most of the club, in fact everyone except Piney, were all for the Roman-style parties and Jax felt ashamed at the amount of fun he'd had at those events. But that was before seeing it through Tara's eyes, and now this realization that Clay had introduced that dirty element into the club left a nasty taste in his mouth. Jax's mind whirled at the contradictory thoughts in his mind. "My mother would never have signed off on it if she thought it was bad for the club. It's just a distraction to help us deal with JT."
"A distraction? Are you fucking kidding me? Going to a ball game is a distraction. A vacation is a distraction. What type of people would hold something like. . . ." Tara waves her hand in emphasis, "that as a distraction?"
"Tara, you have to believe me; things will change eventually. The club is just going through a bad period. It's not going to stay like that." Jax hoped his words sounded sure because his mind wasn't so sure.
"And where do I fit in?" Tara's voice was wavering and when Jax turned towards her he could see her tears being highlighted by the moon's beams. "What happens when you become an official part of the club?"
Jax used his index finger to lift Tara's chin. His blue eyes were serious as he told Tara, "If I do, it means you become my old lady." Jax shook his head, grasping at generalities, because he honestly had no idea what he would face if he became a SON. "It means we can make changes in the club. It means you become part of the club family and have people who love you and are loyal to you. You get the town's respect like you deserve."
Jax's voice became firm. "It means you can never, ever leave my side, because I love you too much."
The words made Tara shake slightly and her eyes begged Jax to be sincere. "Do you promise?"
"I promise I will always love you and need you." Jax's voice lowered as he whispered in Tara's ear, "You own my heart, Tara. I can't be without you."
Jax turned his head and began kissing Tara. "My life begins with you."
Tara's mind was racing and she felt like she was drunk after hearing Jax's words and feeling his breath on her face. A voice inside her head screamed she was making a mistake but she tuned out the warning. Tara returned Jax's kisses so forcefully he had to wrap his arms around her to steady their bodies. Jax's warm mouth left Tara's and began trailing towards her jawline and gently nipped along its contours until he stopped at her earlobe. Tara closed her eyes and moaned while Jax sucked and kissed it.
Jax felt Tara's hands weave into his hair and knew he was done; he couldn't control his actions anymore. Tara's scent invaded his nose as he kissed and nipped her neck and he knew he had to take more as he buried his head between her neck and shoulder-blade. Jax's fingers gently scraped the hoodie on top of Tara's breasts before traveling down towards its lower hem and raising it upward.
Tara always knew she would lose her virginity to Jax but was astonished at her willingness to do it on a greenhouse floor. Her mind was made up though; she didn't want to wait any longer and needed to do this both to express her love to him and to feel his commitment towards her.
"I want you, Jackson." Jax stopped his adoration of her neck and shoulder to look into her eyes. He didn't know if Tara's eyes held fear or if his feeling was being reflected back to him through hers. Jax wanted this more than any material thing he had ever hoped for but the thought of hurting her or providing a poor experience caused his heart to beat painfully in his chest.
Tara gruffly raised the hoodie above her head; her efforts were doubly rewarded because not only did she remove the hoodie but her sweater as well. Jax's entire brain went on autopilot at the sight of her bra and he decided to trust his senses and feelings towards her. Jax unhooked Tara's bra and immediately began sucking and nibbling one breast nipple while molding and caressing the other with his hand. The feel of Jax's rough calloused hand against her soft breast caused such a lengthy moan to escape from her mouth she barely could stop Jax for a moment.
"Jax, wait." Jax removed his head from her breast only to mold and shape both of them with his hands. Jax reclaimed Tara's mouth with urgent, nonstop kisses and Tara had to use her entire will to push him away.
Jax brain was generating a mixture of horror and confusion. Had he misinterpreted Tara? He had never intended to hurt her and it would be the hardest thing in his entire life but he would stop if she wanted to.
Tara didn't waste time explaining to Jax what she was doing. She dropped to her knees, crawled towards the opposite side of the greenhouse and roughly pushed several plants off of what, Jax couldn't tell. It was only when Tara pulled a long rectangular piece of foam from underneath the scattered plants he realized it was a pallet. Tara laid the pallet on top of an empty portion of floor and lay her body upon the cushion.
Jax felt feverish from a combination of lust and excitement, and could barely handle the sight of the girl he loved on her back with open arms directed towards him. Jax removed his clothes as fast as he could and practically ran towards Tara before kneeling between her legs and bending his torso lengthwise towards her.
Tara felt Jax's hands unclasp the button of her jeans and kicked off her heels before he pulled down both her jeans and panties. Then Jax's mouth was on her neck again as his hands toyed with her breasts. Tara's hands swept along Jax's shoulders and she arched her chest towards his hands to continue the sensations on her breasts.
Jax reveled in the pressure Tara was placing on his hands because it ensured she was enjoying herself. Anxious to give her more, Jax leisurely moved his tongue along Tara's collarbone before moving his hands to her hips. Jax trailed kisses between her breasts and down her stomach. He didn't think a girl's pleasure had ever meant so much to him and was relieved to feel her goosebumps with each bodily kiss. Jax scooted his knees back several inches to give himself room while gliding his hands up and down Tara's thighs.
Jax repositioned his head and allowed his mouth to roam from Tara's navel to the thick curls on her mound and gently engulfed large amounts of hair and skin with his teeth.
Tara whimpered at the sensual biting Jax was performing on her thatch. Tara instinctively opened her legs farther as Jack ducked his head even lower and licked her entire sex.
Jax couldn't stop licking, sucking and kissing the outer edges of Tara's walls and her nub. He loved Tara so much all he wanted to do was to drive her crazy. He wanted to erase any doubts she had about giving herself to him. Jax felt drunk as his senses went into overdrive at Tara's slightly musky scent and wetness. The feel of Tara's hips writhing into his face, her hands alternately squeezing and releasing the hair on his scalp and her continual groaning only spurred Jax on. Jax was sure this was the hardest his dick had ever been; it jumped at Tara's every sound and begged to not be ignored. Part of him wanted to receive immediate relief through Tara's body but he forced himself to act slowly and savor this moment - the first time he slept with someone he didn't consider an eventual toss away, and the first time he considered himself making love.
"Jax, please." Tara's voice had lowered an octave because of her lust and wanting. "We need the condom."
Jax refused to remove his head from between her legs. "Jax, we need the condom." It took several seconds to realize what she was asking. Jax stood up and took long strides before reaching his discarded clothes and finding his jeans. Jax pulled his wallet from the back pocket and quickly retrieved a square package from its compartment.
Tara thought her heart would stop beating when Jax arrived back with the protection. The moon caught his body at just the right angle and gave his hair a bright sheen. The lines of his tight chest muscles were excruciatingly clear and Tara couldn't believe she had the love of someone who looked like him. A quick glance at his long, throbbing penis reminded her that there would be pain involved in a matter of minutes but she wanted him so badly it quickly became an afterthought. She loved Jackson.
Jax knelt in between Tara's still-opened legs. Tara watched in fascination as Jax rolled the condom with all the assurance of someone who had done it many times.
"Are you sure Tara?" Tara gazed into his beautiful blue eyes and nodded.
Jax crawled on top of Tara's waiting body and placed one arm in an elbow position beside her head to support his weight. He shivered in anticipation as his other hand position his dick at her entrance.
"I love you Tara Grace." Jax claimed Tara's mouth as he slowly but determinedly pushed himself inside of her. The tightness and warmth of her made him clench his teeth to suppress the animal growls he wanted to make. He felt like his body was drowning in pleasure and knew that within these thirty seconds he had become absolutely manic about Tara's pussy. The bliss he was experiencing made it too difficult to hold his body weight on just one elbow so he quickly made a plank on top of Tara and let his eyes roll to the back of his head.
Tara's mind was adrift. Seeing the red, beautiful poinsettias surrounding her like a forest diminished the sudden pain she felt; she would have smiled at the sight but her pussy was too busy feeling like it was Jax's personal sheathe. She was aware of Jax's heated body hovering over hers and she loosely thought Jax asked her if she was okay. Tara closed her eyes and could only wonder why her hips felt compelled to rotate towards Jax's. The movement caused a burning, friction-type sensation around Jax's dick but underneath that was a titillating, nerve tingling pleasure that was expanding inside her nether regions.
Jax felt Tara's arms encircle his back as her hips moved upward. This was the answer Jax sought and he began to slowly and carefully thrust inside her. Jax continued his motions as Tara learned the stride and soon they were moving in a slow rhythm that gradually increased in tempo.
Sweat was pricking on Tara's forehead and neck and her hips were keeping time with Jax's harder, faster thrusts. Her facial cringes and verbal squeaks were making it difficult for Jax to hold his come; Jax knew that Tara's grabbing onto his back meant her body was climbing towards an orgasm but she most likely didn't know how to close the deal herself. He forced his mind to concentrate and lowered one of his hands towards Tara's nub. He used his knuckles and fingers to wiggle and place pressure on Tara's nub; he felt his own sweat dripping off his back and kept chanting hold on, hold on in his mind to halt his impeding climax.
Soon Tara's lower body began jerking hard towards Jax and he thought he shouted "Oh, shit,' before thrusting helplessly inside Tara and shooting his load. Jax placed his other arm beside Tara's face to avoiding falling onto her but didn't remove his dick because he wanted to lengthen its feeling of warmth just a little longer.
Tara weakly caressed Jax's back and raised her head slightly for a kiss. Tara's emotions kept jumping from love to satisfaction to astonishment. She wanted to focus on her love for Jax but her body was still processing all the sensations Jax's dick had developed inside her. Her pussy was still aching slightly but that was nothing compared to the satisfied glow her nub was radiating. Tara's lower body felt wobbly and she wondered how long it would be until they could have sex again.
"Are you okay?" Jax's voice was thick with contentment. He was surprised he could even form words at the moment. Tara's arms squeezed Jax's back as hard as she could before she laughed.
"I guess you didn't notice my new bra set. I should have gotten it a long, long time ago."
Jax chuckled as he rolled onto his back while embracing Tara until she was snuggled into his side. Both Jax and Tara were silent as the moon made its nightly crossing through the sky. They both realized this was the beginning of their forever, and at this moment it felt more than wonderful.
This concludes the short story, "Veiled Hearts." I'm honored that so many of you have taken the time to read and review my work, thank you so much. If I decide to carry on, I will write a series of skits, Tara's POV, called "Wild Nights are Calling." This short story will highlight Tara's descent into the world of SAMCRO with some smut thrown in for good measure. I couldn't include smut in this story because of Tara's innocence. But she won't be innocent any longer in the next segment, so anything goes, LOL. I figure we all need something light-hearted and different after the end of last season, so why not?
Until then, take care.