Chapter 10: Waterfalls, fights, and Sea Kings, OMFG!

I'll tell you the truth; I don't usually say the f-bomb. I only say it if I'm pissed, or too shocked to realize what I said. And neither do the girls in my class. But when we saw that the river we were sailing was going off the end of a cliff, we couldn't help but shout,

"OH MY F!#KING GOD!"

Trust me; you would scream too if you were witnessing what we were seeing.

"Idon'twannadie,Idon'twannadie,Idon'twannaDIE!" Al chanted in a corner with Ussop and Chopper. Rick-James fainted with his eyes rolled back and foam spraying from his mouth. Pete followed his lead and did the same. Chip, who just happened to be poached on Pete's shoulder, was squished underneath the shadow user before the poor monkey knew what happened,

"Oh good God in heaven!" Ashley shouted as she and Jessica tied themselves to one of the masts.

"YOSHA! Here it comes!" Luffy shouted from his position on the panther figurehead, a Monkey D. Luffy © smile stretched across his face.

"LUFFY YOU DUMBASS! STOP JUST SITTING THERE AND HELP US!" we scolded Luffy before we noticed that he was right; the boat was about to fall off the cliff. We all shouted,"OH GOD!" And the Crouching Panther fell down the waterfall. The only thing that Bobby-Joe could say to everyone was,

"Hold on tight ya'll!" To which Ana shouted right back to him,

"TO WHAT?!"

"To something solid, Ana!"

"SOMEONE HELP ME!"

"LUFFY! USSOP FELL OFF THE BOAT! GET HIM!" Jessica ordered our Captain. Luffy got off the figurehead and ran to the back of the boat. By now, poor Ussop was a good 50-something feet in the air behind us. The rubber Captain twisted his legs around the railing and stretched his arms out and grabbed the long-nosed sharpshooter. When he pulled Ussop back onto the boat, he was also passed out from fright much like Rick-James and Pete.

"Everybody brace yourselves!" Nami warned us.

You don't need to tell me twice! thought to myself as I hung on to the rope ladder going up the mast for dear life. No sooner had the words reached my ears did our boat hit the water. I looked behind the mast and Nami's face was bright blue and was mumbling something we couldn't understand.

"Excuse me for interrupting Navigator-san, but I don't think now is the right time to be overwhelmed." Robin calmly stated. We all looked around our ship and saw she was right; every boat except ours was fighting with one another!

So this is what the life of a pirate is like... f!#king cool man! This sure as hell beats the boring shit we do at home!

"What the hell are they doing?!" Ussop asked. Seemed like the sound of the cannons woke him up.

"The race has started Ussop," Zoro said with a small grin on his face.

"Right, from this point on, anything goes." Nami said.

Well in that case, maybe Rick-James should do his "Men Gone Wild" stunt, that always works!

Nami's loud orders disrupted my thoughts, "Ussop, go and guard the aft deck! Val, does anyone in your class have good aim?" Val answered with,

"David and Randy do, they go hunting every chance they can get. Bobby-Joe and Fort Knox may also be a good shot, but I'm not 100 sure."

"Alright then, David and Bobby-Joe, go guard the port side with the cannons! Randy, you and Fort Knox do the same thing with the starboard side!"

"Which one's which?"

"Port side is the left side Bobby-Joe!"

"Ya'lls left or my left? And which one is left?!"

"Bobby-Joe, now is not the right time to be dyslexic! The port side is THAT side! And will someone please wake Rick-James and Pete up!" Nami shouted as she pointed to the correct side of the boat to Bobby-Joe that was the real port side.

"We're on it ya'll!" Fort Knox replied as he, Bobby-Joe, David, and Randy took the stairs to go below deck. Ana quickly kicked Rick-James and Pete in the sides, causing them to wake up, before returning to help Ussop load the cannons. I looked ahead of us and saw that Gasparde was not that far in front of us. All the ships in his way either made sure they got out of his way ASAP or they were crushed by Gasparde's much bigger boat. Pretty soon, just about everyone on a crew was boarding someone else's ship and started to fight the people on it. Luffy watched all of this while sitting on the figurehead, laughing his head off.

One of the cannons on our port side went off, hitting the ship to our left. The person on the wheel tried to get back on course, but they wound up crashing onto shore and one of it's masts hit a rather tall building.

"Good job down there!" Chopper shouted down the stairs before returning to his position at the rudder.

"Hey, look over there! It looks like Bobby and Pongo are tryin' something out!" Jessica announced. We looked to our port side and saw that the two giants were heading straight towards the beached ship that we hit. It seemed like they were going to use that as a ramp to send them up into the air to the other side of the river, putting them ahead of everyone else.

"Hey Chuck, I betcha ten bucks they don't make it." T.J. proposed while flashing a ten dollar bill.

"Dude, I'm not stupid; there's no way in hell they're gonna make it." Chuck replied. He was right, the Giants hit the boat and went into the air, but wound up crashing halfway to the other side of the river. Seeing this, Nami turned around and ordered,

"Chopper, cut the helm!"

Now why did she want him to do this? Oh, maybe because we just happened to be going in the exact same direction Bobby and Pongo took before they tried to take off flying. Chopper however was struggling.

"I'm trying, but it won't budge!" he said as he put all his weight against it.

"What!? We'll crash at this rate!" Nami said. Hearing the word 'crash' Al instantly started to run around in circles with his arms in the air like a headless chicken.

"We'regonnacrashwe'regonnacrashwe'regonnaCRASH!!" He cried out with fake tears running down his face. I pulled a rather large spatula that my family uses to flip pancakes with and handed it to Jessica and Ashley. They grabbed it and took turns slapping Al with it before giving it back to me.

"Dude, you're not helping much so calm down before you blow a blood vessel in your brain!" I said.

"Hey, if I kicked the ship from below, would that cushion it?" Zoro asked. I could feel a sweat-drop forming behind my head after hearing that comment.

Zoro, even though you win with the most amount of fangirls back home, you're still a big-ass BAKA!

"YOU CAN'T DO THAT!" Nami shouted before her eyes lightened up with an idea, "Ah! A cushion! Luffy!" she called out to our Captain.

Next thing we knew, Luffy performed his GOMU-GOMU NO FUUSEN(1) on the crashed boat, causing us to roll off him and go flying into the sky!

Ussop ran to the back of the boat and held out his hand, allowing Luffy to grab on.

"Y'know I don't wanna spoil the mood here, but WHAT THE HELL ARE WE GONNA DO NOW?!" Pete frantically asked. He was right, we were gonna suffer the same fate as Bobby and Pongo if someone didn't do anything soon!

"OROGRAPHIC CURRENT! (2)"Bri shouted while holding her arms straight out in front of her. A strong wind caught our sails, making us get a bit closer to the river. The wind only lasted for about five seconds before Bri had to stop it. Holding the ship with brand-new powers that you haven't gotten used to can really drain you. Poor Bri was sweating and panting heavily. Robin put her hand on Bri's shoulder and said,

"Thank you Wind-san for your help. I'll take it from here." The archeologist crossed her arms and said,

"GRAN FLUER!" A bunch of arms sprouted from the starboard side of the boat. Then they kept appearing by sprouting on top of one another until they reached the right side of the short and formed a large hand that grabbed a building near the water. The arms pulled us until we were safely in the water. Well, about as safe as one could be surrounded by fighting pirates.

"Good job Robin-chwan! You are amazing as always!" Sanji said while twirling around on a rather large heart.

"Do ya'll wonder where he gets those hearts?" Grant asked us. No one really raised their hands, so the topic dropped.

"It's almost unreal how some of this stuff happens. I'm surprised we've lasted this long to be honest." Ussop said as we continued sailing onto the river as it became part of the sea.

"Ya'll haven't seen anything yet Ussop. Just stick around, things get much stranger when you're with us." Maggie said with a small smile on her face. Everyone's jaws almost dropped; Maggie spoke more than five sentences in one week!

"Oh, by the way, thank you Robin! Everything went just like I planned!" Nami said as she sat down on the stairs. Zoro couldn't help but shout,

"LIAR!"

"Well, now that we're on our way, we might as well enjoy the ride." Robin suggested.

"Good idea Robin." David said after coming up the stairs from below deck with Fort Knox, Randy, and Bobby-Joe. Randy's eyes darted across the deck before asking,

"Hey, have any of ya'll seen Anaguma lately? I haven't see him since we boarded the ship." There was a long pause before Val said,

"See THAT'S the reason why none of ya'll should have any kids when ya'll are older!"

"Hey, it's not like someone told us to watch him!"

"OK, everyone split up and search for him. Wait, Zoro, you stay where you are and I'll make sure we stay on course." Nami ordered.

"THE HELL IS THAT SUPPOSED TO MEAN NAMI?!"

"Hey Zoey, what does Nami mean anyway?"

"Oh, basically to make up for him being so freakishly strong, Oda-sensei designed him to have a lousy sense of direction Fort Knox.

"How bad is that?"

"He thinks that the direction North is up."

"Well at least as not as bad as Ryouga from Ranma 1/2, right Zoey? He could get lost in his own house."

"Oh yeah, I forgot about him Ana."

Fast forward 2 hours later

Well, it took us two hours, but we found Anaguma. He was hiding in a chest full of cannon balls. Don't ask me what he was thinking because I've got no clue. And after that, since we couldn't see any other ships, Sanji started to make us lunch.

Ah yes! Finally, I get to try some more of Sanji's food! And since I'm a girl, Sanji will let us have first dibs!

I was about to offer Sanji some help, only to be interrupted by Anaguma shouting,

"I can't take this anymore! Goddamnit, why won't you all kill me already?! I'm no use to anyone, so go on and kill me." I could tell by the looks on my classmates faces that his words were like stabbing a knife in our hearts.

"Don't you think you're treating your own life a bit lightly?" Nami asked as she looked at the boy from her seat at the table.

"I don't need to be lectured by a pirate," Anaguma said as he sate on the ground, "Why should I care? There's no reason to keep living without any hope. I'd be better off not existing at all." At this, Rick-James stood up, walked up to Anaguma and punched him straight in the jaw.

"You can't keep living because you have no hope? That's the most retarded thing I've ever heard! You said that you have a Grandpa to take care of you, so what about him? At least you have someone! My parents aren't really my parents. I've never met my birth mom or birth dad and how do you think I felt when I found out that I was the result of a one night stand with a 16 year-old girl and some random guy working at a carnival?!" Val stood up and then slapped Anaguma on the other side of his face, saying,

"You think your life is so bad? Try walking a mile in my shoes then. I was an alcoholic and addicted to painkillers by the time I was eleven and I was arrested when I was twelve! The only reason why I didn't go to jail is because they pitied me! They felt sorry for me! So when they returned me to my parents, they sent me to a f!#king mental hospital where I was put on suicide watch! But I'm still here and you wanna know why?" Val didn't wait for him to answer, "It's because even when you think ya'll are at the lowest possible point you could be, there's always the chance that it can get better. It because of that, I'm not dead right now. Besides, if you're alive, then you can't talk about dying!" My mouth was on autopilot and I couldn't stop myself from saying,

"Anaguma, you're young and that means that the best is yet to come. If you keep thinking that it's only gonna get worse, then it is! I should know because at one point I thought it could only get worse. I had to leave all my friends and family behind when I was nine and when I was twelve, I saw my best f!#king friend die right in front of my own eyes.(3) Everyone made fun of and ridiculed just because I was different than them. So if you think you're the only person here who's got some problems, then you're dead wrong," I motioned my hand to all my classmates, who were standing up and glaring at the boy, "Because all of us have gone through some shitty stuff but it's those things that made us who we are today."

"Oi, lunch is ready!" Sanji announced. Our ADHD minds were distracted by the smell of food, so we rushed to the table, leaving Anaguma very confused as he continued to shake in a corner.

FF 2 hours later

I was trying to relax a bit before dinner, but that idea crashed the moment another ship fired a cannon at us.

"Oh c'mon! Can't we get one f!#king break around here?!" Rick-James yelled to the sky, as if someone was going to answer him. The captain of the other ship started to go off on a monolog, but we just ignored him.

"Who is that?"

"I dunno, but he's getting annoying."

"So which one of ya'll is gonna fight them?"

"Now I remember! He was close to us at the beginning of the race!"

"I thought we were in last place."

"Apparently he's in last place Chopper." The other ships Captain heard this and demanded,

"WHAT THE HELL DID YOU SAY?!"

"He got mad when he heard the truth!"

"I don't think that was the smartest thing to say Luffy!" I don't think Ussop could take anymore because he fired an egg from his slingshot into the Captain's face. This gave Zoro and Sanji enough time to jump onto the other ship and start attacking.

A Zoro and Sanji fighting team! GOD DOES EXIST!

Of course just when the fight started, both boats started shaking and rose into the air. We all ran to the railings to see what was going on and we all just about fainted. Why?

"JESUS, VIRGIN MARY, ON A SLICE OF TOAST! WE'RE ON A SEA KINGS HEAD!"

Authors Notes

(1) Gomu-Gomu no Fuusen: Translates as 'Gum-Gum Balloon'

(2) Orographic Current: Orographic is a type of wind that tends to lift things up, hence this move that helps keep the boat in the air

(3) This is somewhat true. When I was 12, my best friend at the time was my pet dog, Rider. We had to put him down because he had cancer. Six months earlier he had an operation and we thought they got rid of it, but apparently we where wrong because it spread to his chest and leg. It was either amputate the leg and he lives a painful year or put him down. I had Rider since I was three so This was like loosing my best friend and brother all at the same time.