I am turely sorry, you guys. This wasn't at all what I had planned when I said I could write for some time and yeah...I am really sorry it took me so long to get back to this story, but it just all went out of my hand at some point and suddenly my life started changing a whole lot. Now i guess everything has settled so far that I will hopefully be able to write more regularly, at least I promise to try my best. ^^
So I am really happy for everyone that reviewed and favoed and alerted this story as always. You really help me keeping this up and reminding me that there are people out there that want me to write more of this so thanks for that. ;)

This chapter is Chris centered, for everyone missing him last time, but I promise the next few will have both thier POV's again so that we get to know how their situations develop. ^^

Chris was furious. That pretty much said it all. But from time to time into that fury there would tangle a portion of sadness, which would increase more and more until the fury grew once again over his weakness. It had gone just like that for the past three days.

Chris was back in Los Angeles and he still thought about what Darren had done, asking himself if Darren had even been thinking what his actions would do to Chris. On the one side Darren sure had done the right thing, when he had just left but Chris didn't get over the fact that he hadn't even got a written goodbye. Sure, Darren had left that note, but it had made everything just more confusing instead of little more clear.

With a loud thump, Chris' head meet the surface of the wooden table in Ashley's apartment. Ashley was still looking down at her friend in patience, but she already knew that something had to change to get Chris out of this circle of constant thinking. Darren this and Darren that. Sure, at the very beginning, after she had found out she mid have said that it had been cut, but the longer Chris had taken to get over the dork with the curly hair the more it did hurt her too, seeing Chris like this always did things to her that she couldn't explain herself. She wanted to protect him somehow, in all the ways she could, but Chris needed to do this alone, just like he had said. He had to learn to stand on his own feed all over again and all Ashley could do was hold his hand and steady him, but she couldn't do the walking part for him.

"Chris, you have to get out of the house. Go out or something, but just do it. Don't fall back into your own pattern where everything revolved around Darren, okay." ,she looked at him questioningly, but there was no responds from Chris, who had his head still on the table top. It was a few minutes later though when Ashley heard Chris mumble something into the table.

"What does it mean, Ashley? It makes me go crazy. What does it mean?" Ashley knew Chris was revering to the note Darren had left, but she didn't know the answer either. She had first thought Chris knew, when he had come and shown it to her, but he had made it very clear that he knew just as much as she did about the meaning.

"Why didn't he say goodbye? I don't understand him.", Chris mumbled further on and Ashley rolled her eyes. They had also covered that a couple of times before.

"Chris, Darren wanted a clean cut for the both of you. I don't know as much as you don't who he thought would be the one to suffer under the renewed goodbye, but he thought about it, Chris. Maybe he just wanted to be nice. To help you get over the entire parting thing. Wanted to prevent another one of the heart wrecking goodbyes you guys shared last time. I really don't know what his intentions were, but you can clearly see that he thought about what he did before he did it and I think that says a lot Chris. He cares. He doesn't want you hurting, you understand that. That's why he did all of this." Chris sighed when Ashley had finished her little speech and lifted his head from the table.

"I know all that, but still. It just doesn't seem right." Another sigh escaped Chris before he stood up.

"But maybe you are right. Getting out doesn't sound all too horrible. Maybe that will take my thoughts off of Darren, because there are many more besides that curly haired freak, aren't there." And there even was a smile playing around Chris' lips as he went for the door and finally disappeared into the hallway.

A little later Chris stood in front of the mirror in his bathroom. His hair was a mess and his face was flushed from the wind it had previously encountered, while he had made his way back to his apartment on his motorcycle. He just stood there his blue eyes looking straight at his reflection in the mirror. Chris' eyes looked like he hadn't slept in days which wasn't the case and his hair looked like he hadn't showered for as long as he hadn't slept, which also wasn't the case. In a conclusion Chris felt totally disgusting and unattractive and certainly not in the mood to go out, but he still did shed his clothes and stepped into the shower, where the warm water finally woke up his body.

The last few days hadn't been easy on him. Chris didn't know anymore how many times he had made Ashley explain to him why Darren had done what he did. On some level he really was grateful for Darren's actions because he himself had feared what would happen in the morning when they had to part once more, but then Chris was also willing to fly up to Chicago and push Darren. How could he even dare to think that he couldn't handle a goodbye? Okay, yes the last one was mildly put overly dramatic, but other than that…? Yes, he didn't want to let go but still he always had and would do it again. Darren was the past and his future wouldn't go on without Darren freaking Criss. Time didn't just stop because he wasn't there.

Chris wanted to move on, let go and live past this, so he step out of the shower and picked his favorite clothes, called his chauffeur and stepped outside of his apartment, with the one goal in mind. It is time to forget about Darren freaking Criss.

He was sure he did the right thing. It would take all the hurt and discomfort from him and would maybe even be replaced by required love one day or another. Darren as his best friend also was help being rid of all the tension between them, he would probably even be happy when he would get to know that Chris finally had fallen in love …blah blah blah. It would certainly be good for their friendship, Chris thought, because that was everything they had friendship and notice more.

And with these decisions made Chris had finally slipped into his last step on the `how do I get over Darren´- To-Do list.

I just let it go, let it go, let it go
Because there are many more besides you

And soon Chris was sitting in his favorite bar in the city of Los Angeles. It was a rather quite night, but still there were a few really good looking guys wandering around the club, while Chris was observing the entire situation from his seat at the bar a margarita in his hand. He really did entertain the idea of having someone by his side that actually liked him in that way, even though Chris knew that it would probably take him a few more weeks to really open up to someone new. Sure, Darren never really did things that could have been equaled with anything Chris had ever wanted but still all these small touches and shy smiles that sometimes were exchanged over the length of the room where swirling around in Chris head on a steady manner even though he tried to keep the memories at bay ad he knew that it just wouldn't be all to good for him to just jump into the next thing. For fucks sake, Darren was his best friend, guy friend and it took some time to get over him when he still meant so much to you.

Chris took another sip of his drink, shoving the ongoing argument in his head back and burying all these problems for a bit. His eyes were fixed onto a guy with short blond hair and really nice hazel eyes and Chris was debating if now would be a good thing to start this night for good, when someone flopped down onto the seat next to Chris and his eyes sweep to the man now sitting next to him. A smile is playing around his lips as he orders his drink and turns to Chris.

Chris swallows hard when emerald green eyes meet his. Chris had never ever seen someone with so green eyes and some of these raven black curls fall into the eyes of the man where his long eyelashes slightly meet his hair. He was fairly not unattractive.

"Enjoying the view?", the man asked, the smile growing even wider, so that now his eyes even started to sparkle with the amusement.

"Uhm, oh, no…well yes…uhm, I'm sorry. I was somewhere else with my thoughts." Chris smiled back, his cheeks getting hot and a light blush flashing over them from the embarrassment. He really badly wanted to just vanish into the ground.

"I saw that. Well, anyways. My name's Dan." He glanced over at his, his beer bottle clutched in his hands, whilst a few more curls fell into his eyes. Chris swallowed another time and smiled back at Dan, who's smile had turned into a smirk.

"So, do you dance, Chris?" Dan asked still that smirk on his face that if it had ben Darren sitting in front of him would mean nothing good, but right now Chris shoved all the warnings back that were screaming at him, when he tried to read the guy in front of him. Dan was certainly not Darren, so why should he even try to read him. Darren was an open book and Dan most certainly seemed mysterious and therefore everything but an open book.

"Actually, I do." Chris replied and slid down from his seat, his glass still in hand as he went over to the dance floor with his new companion. Dan grinned at Chris and abandoned his beer on the bar, before he followed Chris.

"So, I take you know me? Well, the media me anyways." Chris hadn't instantly noticed that Dan hadn't asked for his name but had known it without even thinking, it seemed.

"Who doesn't know you these days? But yeah, I know a little, but I wouldn't say no if you would reveal a little more of the real you to me." Dan's smirk had definitely a flirty edge to it and Chris was more willing to play the game Dan was offering right now.

"I'll consider that.", Chris replied with a smug grin on his face, which Dan, by the look on his face, took as a challenge to get as much out of Chris as he could.

They danced together and everything seemed to just fall from Chris' shoulders. He felt lighter letting go of what had settled meters high above him and onto his shoulder that had carried this `burden´ for far too long already. It got even easier to open up to Dan with his charming smile when the drinks that always seemed to appear everywhere Chris went settled and the effect of the alcohol was starting. Chris smile was unbearable and one would have said that Chris almost started shining with his flushed cheeks and his smug grin playing around his lips as Dan asked him one question after another digging deeper and deeper into the Chris that only a few really knew about.

Chris never had been the one to open up all that easy and lightly, but now it felt good begin asked about what his favorite color was or what he did in his free time that hadn't been revealed to the media. He actually felt like someone wanted to know him, because he was just his way and that maybe that person even wanted more than the friendship that Mark, Harry and Darren had offered him. Maybe this was what Chris had needed all along. To find someone who could give him what he needed and he could give him the same in return. He had suffered through so many one-sided loves or maybe they all had just been crushes, except for Darren that really was something else completely, but now he felt different. Each time Dan looked at him that special way Chris felt how his body began to tingle and he flushed a little more in embarrassment because of being caught watching. It was maybe childish and he felt like he now was the teenager back at high school, but hell, maybe this would be everything it took to finally have Darren out of his head.

But as Chris thought about it again, that also would just be wrong from his side. Using Dan to get over Darren just to dump him afterwards was just as worse than falling in love one-sided. Maybe it even was the same when Dan really wanted that and Chris was just using him for his own. It would make Chris feel disgusting. He had never wanted to be one of these people to just be with someone to get over someone else and dump that person when he had fulfilled his use or to be with someone to get someone else jealous. It was just wrong and Chris wouldn't sink so low and do that.

It was that very moment that Dan once again looked over. They were at the bar once again, Chris sitting next to Dan another drink clutched in his hand and his cheeks still flushed while he had been thinking about all that when Dan turned slightly and his emerald eyes meet with Chris that were shining in the dim light in a special blue grey combination. The smile playing around Dan's lips shifted a little and the wired tingle returned to Chris' stomach. This fairly hadn't happened that often to Chris that he took this reaction lightly. Something about Dan just made him feel this wired way between comfortable and wanted that Chris just couldn't ignore it. If Darren for god's sake just had looked at Chris like this for one time, Chris had been sure his life had been ruined with no way he would have ever turned back and look at anyone else, but this man sitting in front of him gave Chris the same shills and the same sometimes wired feelings that were floating like clouds around in Chris. Maybe Chris' theory that he would only use Dan to on a selfish manner wasn't quite right after all. At least Chris' feeling told him something entirely else. It wouldn't go as far and say he crushed on Dan, but he fairly had a certain amount of want bubbling up inside him for that man with the raven black hair and the incredible emerald eyes.

A few drinks later, when it surely was already the next morning Chris and Dan left the bar together, Chris arm lopped into Dan's as he laughed and stumbled forward. Dan next to him also could barely hold himself upright without falling over from all the drink and laughing. They stood in the middle of the parking lot, the stray laps shining down onto them when Chris came to a halt and turned to Dan smiling.

But before Chris could even open his mouth Dan was already talking.

"I hope to see you again, Chris. I think it was a night that calls for a next time, don't you think." Dan winked and lipped a piece of white paper into Chris pocket before he turned and walked towards a waiting cab near the bar.

Chris still stood there, his hand slowly closing around the paper as he waited for his driver to arrive. Maybe life finally had thought that he deserved someone who wanted him in equal measures as he wanted him.

Sorry for the ending and where I am leaving all of you now, but everyone deserves their chance to smile and now is just Chris'. he needs some happyness after everything he went through. ^^ ;P
P.S.I will change the rating of the story at some point because it justgot unavoidable. So for everyone liking smut, you'll get it here now too. For everyone who doesn't, please don't be afraid I'll just let you run into something you don't want to read. I will mark the chapter were you'll find the smut, plus it's not going to be the entire chapter but only a part, so you can read the rest of it. I will also mark the section of the chapter that will contain the smut. :)
I hope that will be enough so that you don't run scared from this story because that would just be sad.
I guess that would be all for now. ^^