The following does not reflect the views or opinions of Marvel or the author known as 'Kinetically Charmed'.

Entry number ten:

I'm usually the first one to crack when it comes to apologizing. I don't know why, even when I'm not at fault, I just do. Something inside of me melts, and I start feeling all warm and apologetic... it's always been this way. Ever since I was a little kid, I'd always be the first to apologize to my friends after a petty little fight, and we'd go off skipping hand in hand into the sunset.

Which is why three days after our fight, I was kind of impressed with myself for not caving and sulking to Pete with an apology.

Not that I'm not at least a little guilty, I probably over reacted a little bit, and I definitely got angry over the wrong thing. See, it's not exactly that Pete talked to Rogue and not me. It's more that... Pete is a pretty quiet guy. He keeps his thoughts and feelings to himself. And sometimes, this whole mysterious thing he has going drives me nuts. So when he opens up to someone else, it really rubs me the wrong way.

Especially when he insults me with his explanation. I mean, yeah, I'm a meddler, but I'm getting better. I really am. You guys see how well I've been doing with Remy. I deserve a little bit of recognition there.

Anyways, the first two evenings after our argument, Pete wasn't even around. I'm told he'd spent most of his time at the stupid art studio with Simon and the gang, which sounds like it'd be a super awesome band from the 70's or something.

But when I got home from school the third day, it was pretty hard to avoid him. I went down for a pre-homework snack and there he was, sitting in the kitchen with Illyana, hunched over one of her books, the rest of which she had sprawled out over the kitchen table as he tried his darnedest to explain her algebra questions to her in Russian.

I could see him glance up at me through the corner of my eye as I dug through the pantry for a granola bar with chocolate chips in it, because I figure if I'm going to eat chocolate, it might as well pretend to be healthy sometimes, and I turned to leave without a word. I got back to my room and sat down on my bed with my laptop and granola bar, pretty dang proud of myself for holding strong. I opened my laptop, trying to ignore the intermingling feelings of guilt and forgiveness seeping in, as I began my work.

By the time I'd finished eating my granola bar, there was a knock on my door. Pete let himself in, shut the door behind him, and came to sit down on the edge of my bed silently.

"Pete-"

"I am not used to... sharing." He began, looking up at me from over his shoulder. I shut my laptop and pressed my lips together, "It is not you." He sighed, "I did not mean to upset you-"

"Of course you didn't." I said sincerely, cutting him off from his attempted explanation, "I know that, Pete. And really... I'm happy that you're comfortable sharing with Rogue, I really am, and I get why she would be the obvious person to confide in here, I just... wish that you could open up to me a little bit more. Sometimes."

He pursed his lips and looked back at me from over his shoulder.

"You're kind of a closed book. Sometimes I feel like you just want to keep me out... Or... I don't know."

He stared at me silently for a moment with his lips pursed tightly as he processed everything. Eventually he let out a breath and adjusted his position on my bed so he was facing me a little more.

"I do not want to keep you out." He began, "It is just... how I have learned to operate. I have always been expected to shoulder the responsibility on my own, and to keep my burdens to myself. But," He let out a heavy sigh, "I have been responsible for Illyana for nearly 10 years now and look where it has gotten us. She is failing almost every class. She uses her language barrier as an excuse, but I know it is mostly just laziness on her part. That, and the fact that she seems to be easily distracted by male teachers." He rolled his eyes.

"She's a teenage girl." I shrugged with a half smile, "It's pretty normal."

"I just know if she would stay focused, she would do so well. And it is frustrating to me when I know what is best, and people do not listen to reason. It is as if I have given them the answers to a test and they still manage to fail."

I could tell he was referring to both Remy and Illyana here. And possibly me. And Rogue. Probably everyone he's ever given advice to, ever.

"You expect too much of yourself Pete." I frowned. He looked up at me with a single laugh,

"Of myself?"

"You can't be everything to everyone. You can't expect to be everyone's voice of reason, and then take all the responsibility when they eventually screw up. It's not all on you. You want to hug all the cats, but you just can't. You can't hug every cat, Pete."

I think I may have lost him on the cat comment, but I still got my point across. His eyes dropped down to the bedspread between us and he nodded quietly. I put my hand on his shoulder and dropped my head to the side to force him to look at me, giving him an impish little grin,

"You have to let people screw up sometimes. Like the Pyro incident. She learned a very valuable lesson from Pyro, as did I."

Pete pressed his lips into a reluctant smile and shook his head, "And what lesson was that exactly?"

"Well," I sat back, leaning against the headboard and stretching my legs out on the bed, "That we should always listen to you. Obviously." I informed him with a serious nod which caused him to laugh. He laid back, resting his head on my lap and folding his hands on his chest comfortably as he chuckled,

"Things would be so much easier if everyone did."

"Look, I know things are really strained between you and Remy right now. But I really think you need to try and cut him some slack." I started idly weaving my fingers through his hair as I spoke, "I'm not saying what he's doing is right, because, duh. But this is his dad. No matter how poisonous and life sucking the man may be. Remy just needs to learn that he doesn't need to work for the guy, and maybe just stick to Christmas phone calls and birthday cards. That kind of stuff, you know?"

The corner of Pete's mouth tugged up and he nodded, "I know."

"As far as your sister goes, you're doing the best you can. And frankly, she's actually pretty well rounded, even though a lot of the time I wouldn't mind slapping her upside the head." I smiled down at him with an innocent bat of my eyes.

"I overheard her speaking with Tabby the other day about the amount of "acceptable flirting" with a married man." Pete squeezed his eyes shut and pinched the bridge of his nose, "It is as if she is trying to send me to an early grave."

"Hoo boy..." I grimaced as I continued to run my hand through his hair, "I think we need to teach her about the American term Jail bait. Do you have a Russian equivalent, or does it get lost in translation?"

"I am not sure what is worse though, at least with the married men it is less likely that her flirtations will be reciprocated." He looked up at me and furrowed his brow, "It is the boys her own age I am most worried about. I have been 17. I know what boys her age are like..."

All this served to do was remind me of Pete's hidden experience with relationships.

"What are boys her age like, Pete?" I asked with a crooked smile.

He gave me a pointed look and I snorted.

"Is that what you were like? Did you used to be a teenaged Russian Casanova?" I giggled when he rolled his eyes, "I'm just trying to figure out how you managed to impress Tabby with your dating knowledge."

I was of course, referring to the debate which had ensued a few days ago over when Rogue should call Chad back. Pete had been shockingly knowledgeable on the subject.

"It was just common sense, which is something Tabitha does not posses in spades." Pete commented, closing his eyes comfortably while I massaged his scalp.

"It was a little bit of common sense." I conceded with a nod, "But you kind of sounded like you knew your stuff."

The corner of Pete's mouth tugged up in silent response.

"Alright, so out with it." I phased away from him, letting his head fall back onto the mattress with mock seriousness in my voice, "How many girls are we talking here, because if I'm going to have to deal with some crazy ex some day, I'd like to brush up on my Krav Maga."

Pete laughed, winding his arm around my waist and pulling me down to lay next to him, "There are no crazy exes, I promise. I left them all in Russia."

"So that's why you moved to America..." I joked as he nuzzled against my neck, "What did you do, date all the single women in Russia?"

"I do not know why you are complaining," He murmured against my collar bone, "It left me with a lot of experience."

"I'm not complaining." I stated, trying to ignore the way he kissed his way up my neck to nibble on my ear, "I'm just saying, you know, you gotta give a girl some warning. I don't want some crazy ballerina showing up on my doorstep one day trying to bring the pain."

I felt his chuckle reverberate through his chest and the feeling of his warm breath on my ear pretty much made me forget what the hell I was talking about. I vaguely remember saying something about Kung Fu Panda... which is around the time he found my mouth and quite effectively shut me up.

I was enjoying the feel of his hand lightly dancing across the skin on my stomach, and too busy twisting my finger through his hair as we kissed to notice the sound of the door opening.

Which in my defense, is pretty soundless. So it's not like I would have had much warning anyways.

Instead, I heard a frustrated groan, "Aw guys, come on..."

Pete pulled back slightly and we both turned to see Rogue standing in the doorway with her arms crossed, "Sock on the doorknob! How many times do I have to say this? It literally only takes three seconds. I'll even leave a sock sitting out on the dresser for you if that helps... geeze..."

"Sorry." Pete said as he pushed himself up off of me, glancing at me with that mischievous little twinkle I so love, "We just got carried away."

"Yeah, I've heard that before..." Rogue muttered before jerking her thumb over her shoulder, "Illyana is looking for you. Thank the sweet Lord she didn't find ya."

The playful smile disappeared from Pete's face as he was suddenly reminded of his responsibilities. He gave Rogue a nod and turned back to me as I was sitting up and flattening my mussed up hair.

"I'll see you later." He said with a quick kiss on my forehead before he was off.

Rogue closed the door behind him and gave me a smirk, "At least it's good to see you two gettin' along again."

I rolled my eyes and slid my laptop front and centre, flipping it up to get back to work.

"You didn't happen to mention the double date again, did you?" Rogue asked with a forced casual shrug, "You know, it's not a big deal or anything..."

"No, oddly enough the topic didn't pop up." I snorted.

"I bet I can think of one thing that popped up." Rogue grinned. I did not grin. I grimaced.

"You're disgusting." I shook my head, "You should definitely try to curb that kind of trucker talk when you're with Chad. I don't think his tender little ears could handle it."

She sat down hard on her bed with her brow pinched, staring at me with sudden concern, "I hadn't thought of that."

"Well you should." I muttered, paying more attention to the computer screen than to her. "Chad isn't Remy. He's not gunna find your crude mouth endearing."

She turned her eyes to the floor and absently chewed on a nail, "You're right. Shit. What the hell am I gunna talk to him about..."

"You'll figure it out." I said, looking up from the computer screen reassuringly, "That's what the double date is for. To bridge the gap between the awkward first few dates, and the comfortable dating stage, you know? I'm sure you guys will get along just fine." I looked back to my work, typing away on the keyboard as I spoke, "And I'm sure Chad's not that boring once you get to know him a little more. You guys might even have something in common."

"Yeah." Rogue nodded, clearly in an attempt to convince herself that I was right.

"And then you can tell your future children about how effing boring their daddy was on your first date and how you had to drink eight double espressos just to stay awake during the conversation." I smirked at my computer screen until a pillow wolloped me in the back of the head.

Something tells me Rogue doesn't find that "future children" joke funny...